Depressed with weight. :(

soccerash21
soccerash21 Posts: 9
in Health and Weight Loss
Ugh. Hi everyone.

I'm in a massive depression right now. I havenmt really had issues with my weight. I've been the same weight since high school pretty much (between 150-157.) But recently I gained weight. I weigh like 160 and i am incredibly embarassed and upset about it. i did a lot of sports growing up, and my mom has a bigger build, so I al by no means a stick (like I'd like to be!) Anyways, I'm 26 and am 5'7. I'm getting married in October, so I al freaking about looking perfect. I don't ever know what to eat, so that could be a problem. I'm a nanny, so 4 days a week I take them on a walk. I can get in at least a mile, and then I try to do 2 more at home at least 4 xs a week. I just feel like i am super fat and just want to hide in a hole. My fiance, as well as a lot of family members, tell me I'm not fat, which idk if they say it bc its true, or to make me feel
Better. I'm just looking for advice or encouragement. :(

Replies

  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,487 Member
    1) You've only gained 3 lbs and it's got you this distressed, I don't know that weight is your real issue.
    2) Why is there no food in your diary?! Starving yourself, especially when you have so little to lose isn't going to do you any favors.
  • soccerash21
    soccerash21 Posts: 9
    Hi,

    I've been super sick the past few days, so i havenmt been logging much the past couple days.

    3 pounds still makes me feel like i've gained a zillion. I have bad self esteem, so yes, this is obviously contributing to my weight issue. But I looked at all these charts and they all said for my height and age, i am obese. So I think that's a big part of my issue.

    Thanks for your reply!
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
    Hi,

    I've been super sick the past few days, so i havenmt been logging much the past couple days.

    3 pounds still makes me feel like i've gained a zillion. I have bad self esteem, so yes, this is obviously contributing to my weight issue. But I looked at all these charts and they all said for my height and age, i am obese. So I think that's a big part of my issue.

    Thanks for your reply!

    At 5'7" and 160 pounds, your BMI puts you just slightly in the overweight range. You're still a long ways away from the obesity line.
  • HeidiCooksSupper
    HeidiCooksSupper Posts: 3,839 Member
    Deal with the depression. Weight is not the problem. The longer you avoid addressing the psychological issues the more entrenched the problems become. This is the voice of experience speaking -- one who avoided addressing it early on and tried to 'self-medicate" with alcohol. Don't do anything as stupid as I did. Go speak to a counselor. They study long and hard to understand what is going on and help with what ails ya.
  • granitendirt
    granitendirt Posts: 76
    Hey there,

    We sound pretty similar! I'm 26, 5'6", and weigh 157. My weight has fluctuated between 145 and 175 for most of my adult and teenage life.

    Also, you are technically in the 'overweight' category, not 'obese'... Although that's just based on BMI charts, which aren't always accurate. At my height, weight, and measurements, I'm about 26% body fat, which is in the acceptable range.

    My self esteem's in a pretty good place right now, but that hasn't always been the case. Feel free to friend or message me if you'd like encouragement along your journey.

    Congratulations on your upcoming wedding!
  • potluck965
    potluck965 Posts: 529 Member
    Don't be depressed. Just renew your determination. Set your goals, log your food, do your exercise and you will reach whatever weight you want.

    Depression is counterproductive. Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

    Go forward, not backward.
  • simply_meggie
    simply_meggie Posts: 16 Member
    Hello,
    You should not beat yourself up about your weight because it will hurt you more than help you. Do not let a few pounds hurt you, your significant other is going to love you no matter your weight. The trick is staying positive!
  • soccerash21
    soccerash21 Posts: 9
    Holy moly, thank you all for your help!!!

    I would like to speak to a counselor about my depression with my weight,
    But i don't have any insurance.. So unfortunately that is out of the question :(


    Everytime I make a comment about thinking i'm fat or overweight, my fiance yells at me and says that i'm
    Not. I really wish that I could just listen to him, but for some stupid reason I can't. I'm just unhappy with it and wish I could weigh less. But no matter how little I eat or how much I workout, it just won't budge off of me. He always also yells at me for looking at those charts, because he says they aren't always accurate, like you stated.

    Thanks again for all of the support everyone!!
  • JenSD6
    JenSD6 Posts: 454 Member
    My small opinion, but you really don't need to worry about being absolutely perfect for your wedding. You'll be stunning and he will love you no matter what. Relax and don't worry about a few extra pounds. They can come off with a little extra attention to your diet.
  • GorJesssOne
    GorJesssOne Posts: 4 Member
    If it makes you feel any better my goal is 165.... and I'm 5'5 and 28 lol Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I bet you don't look as bad as you think you do.
  • michellechawner
    michellechawner Posts: 892
    seek professional help. I understand you have no insurance - do you go to school? All the colleges I've been to offer little to no charge health things, like shots, physicals, and mental health options.

    Weight isn't the issue here. Your self esteem / body image of yourself is the issue. And as odd as it sounds, exercising actually helps with depression. About a year and a half ago I was in a pretty bad depression as I was diagnosed with a new medical issue - the doctor said as hard as it is, just exercise, build up your endurance and even if you just walk, you will feel better. Sure enough, he was right.

    Also, as great as your fiance sounds, he is right. But please don't always go around saying your fat, etc. It takes a huge emotional toll on him too. Go ahead and ask my boyfriend, I used to be the same way (at my heaviest I was 170, at 5'5). He said all those comments I made hurt him and we fought a lot because of it. You don't have to believe what he says if you don't want to, but don't always bring it up.
  • soccerash21
    soccerash21 Posts: 9
    I do go to school, but it's a weird situation. We moved to California a few years ago due to a job he got, so I was able to finish up my degree with the school I was attending back home in Chicago. So I can't really take advantage of any low income insurance they offer, bc it would have to be an in state doctor that the school approved of :( (i already checked into it, haha).

    I know i have an issue with my self image. I try to just contain it and keep to myself, but sometimes (like today) it gets hard and i just have to let out. I enjoy working out because I have found that it does indeed help with my depression.

    I'm sorry if i came off like i am whining or complaining. I was just lookinh for advice as to how other people deal with their weight issues, and i truly appreciate everyones advice:)
  • 1princesswarrior
    1princesswarrior Posts: 1,242 Member
    You need to see a doctor about your depression, this is a chemical imbalance in your brain, not a weight issue. I know having no insurance is brutal but you need to figure something out, it can get much worse. While I don't agree with your fiance's tactics of yelling at you, I do agree that you should not obsess over the charts and such. I'm 5'4" and I have a lot of muscle already so my trainer said I will be lucky to get down below 160 and my goal was 140. So you need to take that into consideration.

    Make yourself do more than walk when you're not working. Zumba or running is a great endorphin release and will help you feel better for awhile. It will also help relieve stress.

    If you want you can add me and if you ever need to vent just let me know. I've fought with depression my entire life so I know you can't just "get over it" without help. Someone else said they turned to alcohol, I turned to food.

    Good luck.

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