Self Sabotage

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Well another weekend come and gone and another weekend of self sabotage. I can't seem to get this weekend thing down. I tell myself it will only be this one meal, or this one day, or even better I"LL BE "GOOD" THE WHOLE WEEKEND... then BAM!!!! It's not just this one meal or one day and I'm never "good" the whole weekend. Then I tell myself well you're still working hard so you deserve it. I don't deserve to repack on the pounds on the weekend (whether it's salt or water or whatever the pounds are still there after 2 days) then I have to start my process all over again. I deserve to eat what I actually need to not what I think I want (I never want it AFTER I eat it) and I deserve to treat my self with more respect than that. I think this almost every Monday and never truly admit to it so maybe putting it in writing for everyone else as well as myself to see it will help it stick.
Also if anyone has any tips for a girl to get through a weekend....????

Replies

  • RoyBeck
    RoyBeck Posts: 947 Member
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    Just be strong. Only you can do this. Try looking through some old photos when you were maybe smaller and pin it to your fridge. Works for me.
  • Lucy_6678
    Lucy_6678 Posts: 63 Member
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    I have the same problem :(

    I think of it as the Monday hangover. I am feeling it now as I type actually. It is ok to be mad at yourself but you also have to get over it and move on. Maybe force yourself to do 10-15 minutes more exercise this week.

    I ride the exercise bike 60 minutes a day- today I should ride it for 70 minutes to make up for the bad weekend. Its just a suggestion. Good luck!
  • kbragdon13
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    If you have extra time on the weekend workout twice as long. I agree weekends can be tough. It does help to make a plan. If you know you are going out or to a party stick to the diet all day. God luck!
  • ShrinkingMuslimah
    ShrinkingMuslimah Posts: 99 Member
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    This is just what I do, and it works for me.

    Just take it one meal at a time, start with breakfast. I want pancakes smothered in butter and maple syrup and candied pecans, what I will have is oatmeal with a couple tsp maple syrup, toasted pecans (not candied) and sliced banana. Done? Good! One meal down!

    I keep going like that, just one meal at a time, instead of thinking "Oh I'll just be bad this one meal then good for the rest of the day" try switching it around and thinking "I'll be good this one meal and then see how the rest of the day goes" and for me, when I do that I feel so good that I ate a nice healthy breakfast I feel so proud of myself that instead of saying "I'll reward myself with an unhealthy lunch" I usually feel motivated to KEEP eating healthy!

    Another thing you can try, is get a mini chocolate bar or mini bag of chips or whatever it is that you like as a "treat" and keep it out where you can see it, eat healthy all day, and say if you ate healthy and have your 100 calories (or however many calories that snack is) left at the end of the day then you get to eat your snack, if you weren't able to control your eating enough to have 100 cal leftover at the end of the day, then you don't get your snack, and put it away for tomorrow. That way every time you're making a choice for a meal you think "Hmm should I just be bad this once?" Then you think "No! I have a candy bar waiting for me at home at the end of the day!"

    In the end, I believe that weight loss is mostly in the head, and the tricks that I use to keep myself mentally on track and motivated might not work for everyone. But hopefully you find what works for you, whatever it may be. The guilt of feeling like you've sabotaged yourself can sometimes be worse than the actual amount of weight gained because of it. Try not to beat yourself up though, and take it one day, one meal, one bite at a time.
  • Rarity2013
    Rarity2013 Posts: 196 Member
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    I don't even bother on weekends- I eat, drink and am merry and would be damn well miserable if I didn't. What I try to do instead is limit my greed, and over the months, I've done this in small increments.

    I used to think absolutely nothing of drinking a bottle of wine a day over Friday, Saturday and Sunday, and I would join my husband in sweets whether I really wanted them or not.

    Now I have a bottle of wine to last Saturday and Sunday. If I drink it all on Saturday, that's fine, but there's none left for Sunday. I have a chocolate bar, but if the shop doesn't have the one I particularly want, I skip it rather than have an alternative that I don't fancy. I only have a cake if I really want one, not just because my husband is having one.

    These were small, gradual steps that have become second nature. This Saturday for example, I ate out at a local pub and still came in around 500 calories over budget, compared to when I started when I would easily be 2000 calories over.
  • Skrib69
    Skrib69 Posts: 687 Member
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    Hmmmm, some interesting choices!! Chicken curry for breakfast has never appealed to me!

    Having said that, if you were to cut down on the cheese, fries and pizza it would be a whole load better. You are only just going over on your calories, but these will be loaded with salt and cause issues with water. Hence, your weight will yoyo up and down.

    I know it is hard to resist temptations but MFP makes it easy to keep on track. I have it on my phone so when I am out I can have a sneaky peek to see how much I have left, and make better choices. If you really can't resist, you could try going for a smaller portion rather than the full blown indulgence, but this clearly requires self control that by your own admission I doubt you have. Instead focus on how you will feel after you have eaten it jumped on the scales. Then, when you have reminded strong for the weekend reward yourself with something small but important (and not necessarily food related!!!)

    Good luck!
  • Skrib69
    Skrib69 Posts: 687 Member
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    This is just what I do, and it works for me.

    Just take it one meal at a time, start with breakfast. I want pancakes smothered in butter and maple syrup and candied pecans, what I will have is oatmeal with a couple tsp maple syrup, toasted pecans (not candied) and sliced banana. Done? Good! One meal down!

    I keep going like that, just one meal at a time, instead of thinking "Oh I'll just be bad this one meal then good for the rest of the day" try switching it around and thinking "I'll be good this one meal and then see how the rest of the day goes" and for me, when I do that I feel so good that I ate a nice healthy breakfast I feel so proud of myself that instead of saying "I'll reward myself with an unhealthy lunch" I usually feel motivated to KEEP eating healthy!

    Another thing you can try, is get a mini chocolate bar or mini bag of chips or whatever it is that you like as a "treat" and keep it out where you can see it, eat healthy all day, and say if you ate healthy and have your 100 calories (or however many calories that snack is) left at the end of the day then you get to eat your snack, if you weren't able to control your eating enough to have 100 cal leftover at the end of the day, then you don't get your snack, and put it away for tomorrow. That way every time you're making a choice for a meal you think "Hmm should I just be bad this once?" Then you think "No! I have a candy bar waiting for me at home at the end of the day!"

    In the end, I believe that weight loss is mostly in the head, and the tricks that I use to keep myself mentally on track and motivated might not work for everyone. But hopefully you find what works for you, whatever it may be. The guilt of feeling like you've sabotaged yourself can sometimes be worse than the actual amount of weight gained because of it. Try not to beat yourself up though, and take it one day, one meal, one bite at a time.

    This is also good advice. As they say, not everything works for everyone. You have to work out your triggers and ways of dealing with them!
  • suziepoo1984
    suziepoo1984 Posts: 915 Member
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    This is just what I do, and it works for me.

    Just take it one meal at a time, start with breakfast. I want pancakes smothered in butter and maple syrup and candied pecans, what I will have is oatmeal with a couple tsp maple syrup, toasted pecans (not candied) and sliced banana. Done? Good! One meal down!

    I keep going like that, just one meal at a time, instead of thinking "Oh I'll just be bad this one meal then good for the rest of the day" try switching it around and thinking "I'll be good this one meal and then see how the rest of the day goes" and for me, when I do that I feel so good that I ate a nice healthy breakfast I feel so proud of myself that instead of saying "I'll reward myself with an unhealthy lunch" I usually feel motivated to KEEP eating healthy!

    Another thing you can try, is get a mini chocolate bar or mini bag of chips or whatever it is that you like as a "treat" and keep it out where you can see it, eat healthy all day, and say if you ate healthy and have your 100 calories (or however many calories that snack is) left at the end of the day then you get to eat your snack, if you weren't able to control your eating enough to have 100 cal leftover at the end of the day, then you don't get your snack, and put it away for tomorrow. That way every time you're making a choice for a meal you think "Hmm should I just be bad this once?" Then you think "No! I have a candy bar waiting for me at home at the end of the day!"

    In the end, I believe that weight loss is mostly in the head, and the tricks that I use to keep myself mentally on track and motivated might not work for everyone. But hopefully you find what works for you, whatever it may be. The guilt of feeling like you've sabotaged yourself can sometimes be worse than the actual amount of weight gained because of it. Try not to beat yourself up though, and take it one day, one meal, one bite at a time.
    ^^this.. Very well put
  • STLBADGIRL
    STLBADGIRL Posts: 1,693 Member
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    In the beginning it was hard for me too...but as I start trying new recipes I've come to really love my healthy eating.

    1 trick I used to do is...if I could challenge myself to eat good on Friday, then I would reward myself with a nice lip gloss the next day...and if I did it again on Saturday, I would reward myself with another nice pleasantry that wasn't food. I don't go on shopping splurges anymore...I REWARD myself now.

    Another trick is to have a plan A and a plan B. I would make sure that I am stocked up with groceries and plan my meals for the weekend....ALWAYS carry a snack to ward away feeling hungry and making a bad choice...if plan A didn't work (planning your meal for the day) have an approved list of restaurants that you can eat from....these restaraunts you have already done your homework on and know what you can and should not eat! Also, another trick is to immediately have them plate half your dinner in a doggie bag so you can only eat half the calories.

    Another is to stop hanging around your friends on weekends that do not have the same goals as you do - this is an epic fail when you are trying to develop a GOOD HABIT!

    Also, workout at the top of the morning. I find that when I workout in the morning, I am less likely to fail the rest of the day b/c I just kicked azz in the gym and its totally not worth it! And make sure your home is stocked with healthy foods and ditched the tempting food. You cannot depend on will power...you need a PLAN! Good luck...and on Friday, remember how you feel today and ask yourself is it worth it!
  • Ether1227
    Ether1227 Posts: 7
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    The best thing that has worked for me is to plan ahead. You can still have a treat or yummy meal, but plan ahead so you look forward to it and don't succumb to all the other temptations. I really love reading other peoples replys.......you guys have some great ideas. Thanks!
  • MsEndomorph
    MsEndomorph Posts: 604 Member
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    I don't even bother on weekends- I eat, drink and am merry and would be damn well miserable if I didn't. What I try to do instead is limit my greed, and over the months, I've done this in small increments.

    I used to think absolutely nothing of drinking a bottle of wine a day over Friday, Saturday and Sunday, and I would join my husband in sweets whether I really wanted them or not.

    Now I have a bottle of wine to last Saturday and Sunday. If I drink it all on Saturday, that's fine, but there's none left for Sunday. I have a chocolate bar, but if the shop doesn't have the one I particularly want, I skip it rather than have an alternative that I don't fancy. I only have a cake if I really want one, not just because my husband is having one.

    These were small, gradual steps that have become second nature. This Saturday for example, I ate out at a local pub and still came in around 500 calories over budget, compared to when I started when I would easily be 2000 calories over.

    You're a woman after my own heart.
    Before I was tracking food I couldn't figure out WHY I wasn't losing weignt. Could it have been the entire bottles of wine I could polish off each evening?

    One of my biggest problems has always been eating because my husband was eating - even if I wasn't hungry or particularly interested in what he was eating. He loves Fourth Meal at about 10pm that usually consists of fast food (that I don't really like). Add all that extra food to my own downfalls (going back to school, PMS, and a disproportionate lover of fat and carbs and wine) and it's a recipe for packing on the fat!

    I don't feel like I've given up many things I like on my current fitness journey. The only things I've cut out are things I tend to binge on, because bringing them into my house is fldangerous. I'll eat a brownie while I out somewhere, but I won't bake any to keep at home. I rarely make yummy breads or the goodies that I used to.

    What I did do is cut out a lot of things I was eating that I didn't really want, and threw in some portion control. I can have one piece of pizza with a salad - not 4 pieces.
  • Alicia_1981
    Alicia_1981 Posts: 32 Member
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    some days vs trying to remember and log everything and guessing at quantities I just put a pizza on there because im guessing its petty darn close anyway... and I love leftovers for breakfast :)

    these are great suggestions thank you for them!!!!
  • tonybalony01
    tonybalony01 Posts: 613 Member
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    For me, it's always been a eat junk now, feel like junk later thing. I'll eat something (an entire pizza, for instance) because I love it. Later, when I'm having a sit down meeting with John, I curse myself for being so stupid.
    Now I ask myself, "Is eating this stuff now worth the feeling (upset stomach, guilt, frustration, etc.) later?" Generally, the answer is no.
    Go ahead and treat yourself to something on the weekends, but do so in moderation. Keeping it all in moderation will definitely help you shed those pounds and achieve your goals.
    Good luck!
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
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    One reason people sometimes have trouble with the weekend is that they are very strict during the week when your days tend to be more regimented. Then when you get to the weekend, you're feeling a little deprived and it's harder to stay in control. What works for me is making sure I don't feel deprived. If there's something I'm wanting during the week (lobster mac 'n cheese, brie, pate, ice cream, chocolate, etc), I'll have some. I just make sure it's an amount that doesn't throw me off goal or adjust my other meals so I'm not off goal. Then on the weekends, I'm not having a hard time keeping myself in check because I know I can and am willing to have X whenever I want it, which means I'm not feeling like I NEED to have all of it now.
  • HacheraTsarine
    HacheraTsarine Posts: 278 Member
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    Well another weekend come and gone and another weekend of self sabotage. I can't seem to get this weekend thing down. I tell myself it will only be this one meal, or this one day, or even better I"LL BE "GOOD" THE WHOLE WEEKEND... then BAM!!!! It's not just this one meal or one day and I'm never "good" the whole weekend. Then I tell myself well you're still working hard so you deserve it. I don't deserve to repack on the pounds on the weekend (whether it's salt or water or whatever the pounds are still there after 2 days) then I have to start my process all over again. I deserve to eat what I actually need to not what I think I want (I never want it AFTER I eat it) and I deserve to treat my self with more respect than that. I think this almost every Monday and never truly admit to it so maybe putting it in writing for everyone else as well as myself to see it will help it stick.
    Also if anyone has any tips for a girl to get through a weekend....????

    What may help you is planning meals and snack in advance. I go by 3 week-end rules :

    1. Try and eat healthy
    2. Sneak in an extra long work-out because of more free time
    3. Go to bed early

    And by "try and eat healthy", I mean planning healthy "junk" meals from hungrygirl.com I have my pizza but without the guilt trip (anyway, guilt is not a friend)
  • krisjohnson121
    krisjohnson121 Posts: 87 Member
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    Weekends are definitely tricky - here are some things I do

    * Always make it to the gym Sat and Sun morning. They have some awesome boot camp classes at my gym that are a crucial workout and fun!

    *Always have an active activity planned - for me its summer so there are lots of choices - we go swimming, pick fruit at a farm or just go to the playground with the kids. But it could be walking at a museum, having an indoor dance party with the kids. My weekends always include active to do items.

    * Plan ONE treat per day - but limit it to one...
    -- Go out for a meal (alot of restaurant show their nutritional content on the website so I plan ahead what I will order
    -- Go out for Rita's or frozen yogurt
    -- Get popcorn at the movies

    One thing - ALWAYS track! This is how you learn! I learned the other day that the Nachos at AMC are over 1000 calories... I used to pick at my husbands - now that I know it is NOT worth it but I will absolutely set aside 300 calories for my Ritas Gelati... by tracking you learn how much things are and can decide what is worth it...