Dealing with the psychological effects of weightloss

Bump.... Very interesting stories!

I'm still a work in progress. I'm a bit more outgoing now than I was when I was heavier. I don't hesitate, i.e. fearing I won't fit, when it comes to booths at restaurants anymore. I've gotten rid of almost all my fat clothes except for 1 pair of jeans and shirt. That was a hard one for me. I wanted to keep them just incase. I'm also not used to the attention from the opposite sex. I have a hard time telling when someone of the opposite sex is flirting with me or they are just being friendly. I always assume they are not flirting with me and just being friendly because sometimes in my mind I still think I am 500 lbs. and I think that there's no way a woman would want to flirt with a big guy like myself.

I have lost 60 lbs before and so I know what KtAnne is talking about. People do treat you differently. It is very real.

Podgeford, enjoy your new body, but don't try not to get cocky like some do...I can come back on faster than you can imagine! lol Enjoy the attention, be proud of yourself and do things only as you feel comfortable doing them. If you are wanting to keep people away from you, you will probably want to examine in depth the reasons for that and heal your past hurts.

What I am afraid of now, especially if I go for weight loss surgery (which is my goal), is being able to feel bones and veins and things that I never felt before. Just yesterday, I discovered a vein in my hand (I've just lost 43 lbs) and pushed on it and it moved. I was grossed right out! I've also noticed that when laying in bed on my side now, I can feel my knees clacking together because the fat is melting away on them! YUCK! How do skinny people do it? I'm used to having cushioning!! I don't want to not be able to handle things if I DO lose the weight!

Try a pillow between your knees while you sleep. But seriously, I hear it is very painful to be very thin. Even sitting in a chair your skin is pinched between bone and the chair. Ewwww. I have never experienced this personally but I heard about it when I watched a show about an anorexic girl.

As sad as it is for me to admit I too hid behind behind my weight for the longest time. I wouldn't go out unless it was for a very very good reason (taking the kids to the dr etc) If I was forced to go out I would try and be as invisible as possible and not do anything that would gather any negative attention. I wouldn't eat if we went to a fair and if we took the kids out to eat we would sit in the car and have a drive through as I couldn't bare people to see the "fatty" eating if we went inside.

Now 90lb lost later I can see how silly it all was. We went to the fair saturday/yesterday and I tried lots of different things and people even mentioned the change in me from previous years. I realise not how much of a hold the weight had on my life. I'm actually living now. I'm not afraid to go out or to be seen. I walk down the street with my head held high, I dont care so much anymore if people look at me or whisper when I go past (I'm still overweight) because I know I'm doing something positive about it and I'm so much healthier than I was. I worried that I'd swap my fear of negative responses for a fear of positive responses but it's nice now when someone tells me how much healthier I look. Just take it day by day and remember that the goal you're heading for is to be healthier and fitter for you


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I can completely relate with you. As odd as it sounds, it is really difficult to deal with the psychological stresses that come along with weight loss. A few years ago I lost about 100 pounds (in about a 14 month span), and I was so excited at first that I figured out a way of eating and exercising that worked for me, but as time went on I started to feel less comfortable in my body. Sometimes it would seem like the weight loss had happened overnight and I wouldn't recognize the person in the mirror. Other times I would have a bad week and focus only on the flaws and feel discouraged that despite how far I had come, I wasn't where I wanted to be. Another thing that really drove me crazy was how often my body changed. When you lose a lot of weight you lose it from various places, and usually at different times. It's like your body is re-molding itself, and no matter what I felt so awkward because nothing ever fit right. Even though it has been a few years since I lost that significant amount of weight and I have managed to keep it off, I still feel awkward and self-conscious. I also have come to admit that I have a body image complex, and it really developed with the more weight I lost.

At the same time though, I have become much more out-going and sociable. I make friends more easily now, and I don't think anymore that they are going to judge me for the way I look. That is something that gradually happened without me noticing. It's like I finally decided to let out the person that was stuck inside of me for so long. This all happened after I moved out of state though. To a place where no one knew the "fat" me, they just knew me. When I visit back home, I am overly aware that everyone knew me before I lost weight, and the wall goes back up. Where it's nice for people to recognize where you came from and how far you have gone, it's a constant reminder that is usually something I don't want to be reminded of.

It all takes time, and it's all kind of a strange up and down roller coaster, but you will make it through.