Self Sabatoge?

KimGreenholm
KimGreenholm Posts: 5 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Ugh! UGH! UGH!

The harder I try to lose weight and "be good" the more weight I gain. It seems the more I want to get down to pre-pregnancy weight, the worse I do.

I had my 2nd (and last) baby 2 years ago. I gained 75lbs with her and have only lost 48, even though I took up running, am back to weight watchers, and try to go to the gym on my lunch hour.

The first two times around with weight loss (38 pounds gone with weight watchers in my early 20's and 75 lost with my 1st baby) it was so easy! Not this time because everytime I am aound food that I shouldn't be eating, I find myself scoffing it down because "I deserve it". WHY? I am miserable and disgusted with myself, which forces me to binge even further.

I am currently 194 (possibly even higher since I missed weigh in last week due to a week off on vacation) and my goal is to be back down to 150. Seems like a never ending uphill battle that I am just giving into. Where's the motivation?

Replies

  • myfitspiration7
    myfitspiration7 Posts: 25
    Welcome!! You are definitely not alone, it is extremely hard to be a mom, workout, work, and stay healthy. I just had my baby in Feb, and if it wasn't for a 25 min workout program I do at home I wouldn't be as successful!!


    Eating is a big part of it, I have learned that I need to keep focus on a lifestyle change not just a diet. Diets are temporary, then when we cant restrict ourselves anymore, we give up. Lifestyle changes are positive, will there be days we fall short, or fall into unhealthy temptations, sure! But we just gotta keep going forward and try better with the next meal!

    Hang in there, you are in the right place for support, I will send you a friend request!!

    Stay strong!
  • Faithfulcatholic
    Faithfulcatholic Posts: 3
    Have your doctor check your thyroid, your TSH, T4, T3. This was part of my problem. :)
  • mmm_drop
    mmm_drop Posts: 1,126 Member
    For many of us, this isn't our first, second or even third time losing weight; for me personally, it is my third and final time getting healthy. In the past the weight came off quickly for me too and then also went back on quickly as soon as I stopped "dieting".

    I think the key is to not think of this as a diet or "being good", but as a lifestyle change that you can maintain. This means that you should make small manageable changes in your life, incorporating healthy changes slowly. Also you mention that when you are around food you should be eating you tend to eat it. It helps to change your mindset from foods you can and cannot have to eating those things in moderation. It is all about balance.

    Something else that may help is making smaller goals or looking at the smaller picture as opposed to the big picture; plan out your meals for one day and have an activity that you will do that day, just take things a day at a time instead of thinking I *have* to lose (x) amount of weight still, think, wow, I have lost (x) amount of weight and look how much healthier I am!

    I hope this helps, good luck to you!
  • WDA4655
    WDA4655 Posts: 91 Member
    Good morning. I am 58 years old now and have been where you are now and worst. I know the frustrations and the disappointment in myself and out right disgust. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Many of us here at MFP are standing behind you to cheer you along your journey, to pick you up when you fall and to walk with you. There is strength in numbers and we will be here for you.

    MFP has a lot to offer you. So be sure to brouse through the site for some great tools that will help you and when choosing friends it's good to read their profit and see where they're coming from. It will help you choose friends who you can relate too.

    If you like, you can friend me. I know how difficult it is to get the baby fat weight off. I have had two wonder babies (now grown up and with children of their own) and I'm still working on getting off a life time of poor decision. But I am proving to myself that I can do it. I've lost 30 lbs. and have about 100 lbs. to go. I am confident that I will succeed in this.

    And I know you will too. Welcome to MFP.
  • Lonestar5775
    Lonestar5775 Posts: 740 Member
    Hey struggling,

    I am a guy so I know nothing of pregnancy weight or the resutling hormones etc. I did identify with your statement about "rewarding" yourself because I found that was at the root of my gaining weight.

    I finally had to admit the "rewards" I was consuming were not beneficial and, guess what, I had to grow up because life was no harder for me than anyone else. If I was honest my life is much easier than for many.

    Once I decided to own my own health, it became easier for me. MFP is such a valuable tool to set a target, have friends to encourage you, and actually see what I am eating in regards to calories.

    I believe if you have the discipline to be raising children you can also make the right food choices. I have confidence in you and wish you all the best in achieving what you know you can do.
  • britzzie
    britzzie Posts: 338 Member
    Ugh! UGH! UGH!

    The harder I try to lose weight and "be good" the more weight I gain. It seems the more I want to get down to pre-pregnancy weight, the worse I do.

    I had my 2nd (and last) baby 2 years ago. I gained 75lbs with her and have only lost 48, even though I took up running, am back to weight watchers, and try to go to the gym on my lunch hour.

    The first two times around with weight loss (38 pounds gone with weight watchers in my early 20's and 75 lost with my 1st baby) it was so easy! Not this time because everytime I am aound food that I shouldn't be eating, I find myself scoffing it down because "I deserve it". WHY? I am miserable and disgusted with myself, which forces me to binge even further.

    I am currently 194 (possibly even higher since I missed weigh in last week due to a week off on vacation) and my goal is to be back down to 150. Seems like a never ending uphill battle that I am just giving into. Where's the motivation?

    I've found it to be easier to stay consistently on track when I change my way of thinking about it.

    I'm in for the long haul, so rather than trying to stick to a 1200 calorie "diet" and working out so much that I don't have a life, I'm doing TDEE-20%, which allows me to eat about 2000 calories a day, workout three times a week, and lose a pound a week. Would I like to lose faster? Yes! BUT losing another pound per week would mean that I'd have to burn 500 more or eat 500 fewer calories a day, and I can't do that and live like I want to. So...slow and steady weight loss it is. (And I get to eat like a normal person!)

    I also take an IIFYM approach to eating. "If it fits in your macros." Which means, if you are going to hit protein and fat goals and stay under calories, then eat the cake, chips, pancakes, cookies, etc. Restricting entire food groups or processed foods makes me feel deprived, which makes me binge. So...I had chocolate cake last night. It fit in my goals and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

    So...motivation comes from within. But it's a lot easier to be motivated when the change you are making is reasonable. Good luck!
  • spottedkathy
    spottedkathy Posts: 196 Member
    Been there and done that. I did the same thing after my last was born. It was so hard for me to find something motivating enough to keep me straight until recently, my youngest 1st birthday. I want to buy a sun dress that looks great on me and want people to see how good I look after having a baby just a year ago. And for some crazy reason this is working for me. Knowing me when this day comes and goes I could easily fall back into my old ways so I have to find something new to work for! Feel free to add me and we can motivate each other! :)
  • JohnMatrix
    JohnMatrix Posts: 59
    As others have said, it’s about getting healthy, making small incremental lifestyle changes and not thinking you’re on a diet. Diet does nothing but carry a negative feeling associated with it. People feel deprived because they don’t go about it the right way. Granted you might need to get a little extreme about it, but if that’s what it takes, then so be it. Just remember you will be happier for it once you get to where you want and it will be MUCH easier to maintain once you do……with some discipline.

    I lost nearly 50 pounds myself before I got where I wanted and it’s still a fight to improve. My metabolism is god awful so I know how much of a beast it is to rein that monster in. But once you start getting in a routine, become accustomed to the changes, see the results, it does nothing but positively reinforce your own ability to achieve your goals.

    Prepare your meals ahead of time, drink lots of water and get on an eating schedule. After a while you stop even thinking about all the temptations in the house. I know it’s hard with a family to eliminate everything of temptation, but I’m sure you can convince your husband to limit what you get. And when you do good all week, treat yourself to one bad meal or some treat after a good clean meal. But work for it. For example, I eat excellent all week, get my weight training in, do my running, spin classes, circuit classes, boxing and hiking in all week. Saturday I eat spot on all day and exercise like a fiend, but I won’t even hesitate to eat a pint or two for that matter of frozen yogurt. I’ve burned so many calories that day alone that even on top of some of my clean meals I’ve got a deficit. But that’s me. The idea behind it is still the same. Do good all week and reward yourself at the end. Plan it so you and your husband and kids have a nice meal and enjoy it together without the guilt.

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