My (not so) Miraculous Transformation

fernelia91
fernelia91 Posts: 10
edited September 2024 in Motivation and Support
OK, this is my very first "new topic" post, so here goes.

I was a skinny person for the first half of my life (small framed, 5'4" tall weighing between 120 and 130 lbs. give-or-take), and though I have struggled to manage my weight for most of my adult life, I've now reached a point where I've really begun to notice what a toll the excess weight is taking on me. In my 20s and 30s, carrying an extra ten or twenty pounds wasn't pleasant, but I never really felt many ill effects from it, and always seemed to manage to lose the weight with sensible eating and exercise. But now I'm over 40 and have close to 50 lbs. to lose. I've never been this heavy in all of my life (pregnancies excepted), and it all seems so daunting. I'd like to hear about the things people have noticed about themselves and/or about the people and things around them as a result of their weight gain (good and bad). By documenting my list here, and reading people's responses, I hope to be motivated to make major changes that will result in the reversal of the ill effects I'm experiencing. I plan to re-visit this list throughout my weight loss journey so that I may witness my miraculous "re-transformation"!

So here is my list, in no particular order of importance. Would love to hear from others.

1. Low energy levels -- I'm tired ALL the time and am easily winded climbing up stairs, jogging, running, etc.
2. Depression/low self-esteem/anxiety
3. Body aches -- especially knees and back
4. Water retention
5. Decreased libido
6. Increased risk for developing Diabetes, heart disease and cancer, especially given my family history
7. Snoring, sleep apnea, night sweats, difficulty sleeping
8. Going from a Size 4/6 to 14/16 -- I have a closet full of cute clothes I can't wear, and a very limited wardrobe for the things I can!
9. Back fat, muffin top, flabby arms, double chin
10. I can actually feel my thighs rubbing together when I walk
11. I don't recognize myself in photographs and videos anymore, and cringe when someone wants to take my picture
12. Skin tags (gross!)
13. Can't wear my wedding rings anymore
14. Spanx (the need for)
15. Not wanting my husband to see me naked
16. Never wanting to go swimming for fear of being seen in a bathing suit (gasp!)
17. Struggling every morning to find something that sort of fits, doesn't feel too tight and uncomfortable, and doesn't look too hideous
18. Avoiding events where I haven't seen people in some time (... my hasn't SHE put on a lot of weight!)
19. Difficulty in performing the simplest things, like putting on socks, tying shoes, polishing my toenails, standing up from a squatting position
20. The instability I felt getting on my husband's motorcycle not long ago and feeling like I was going to tip the bike over
21. Avoiding clothes shopping, especially bathing suits and undergarments (and I used to LOVE to shop for clothes!)
22. This one will seem really weird, but my family physician is gorgeous. She's my age, has four kids and is a knock-out. I avoid going for check-ups or medical visits because I can't stand the thought of her seeing how much weight I've gained in the past year.
23. The feeling of someone else's thigh next to mine when I'm sitting on the bus, and knowing that it's not because the OTHER person is fat!

Replies

  • Kminor67
    Kminor67 Posts: 900 Member
    I am just like you. Depression, back problems, lack of energy, knee problems, on and on and on.... I know EXACTLY how you feel. I have been serious about doing this for four weeks now, and I can tell you, eventually that WILL go away. I have mostly eliminated all refined sugars out of my diet, and I have changed my eating habits, and I must tell you, even though I've only lost 8 pounds, I feel TERRIFIC!!! I have a lot more energy, and I look forward to exercising. I'm only pushing myself to exercise 30 minutes a day for 6 days a week, but I'm finding that by using the exercise database, I'm actually doing much more than that. I'm sleeping better (I used to take sleep aids every night), and I'm looking forward to doing things that I hated before. You have come to the right place!
  • Mesmereyes
    Mesmereyes Posts: 83 Member
    Excellent idea and excellent list! I suffer from each and every one of the things on the list, with the exception that my doctor is a gorgeous male. I wish I could respond with some feedback that would show the changes. But I am still a newbie and still trying to figure it all out. I wish you the best of luck and am looking forward to us BOTH marking these items off the list. :)
  • 00trayn
    00trayn Posts: 1,849 Member
    To give you some positive feedback from the other side of things... I was 75 pounds over a healthy weight. I've now lost 53 of those pounds and my body fat percentage has really decreased so I look even smaller than that. I can very much relate to most of that list. Here are some of the miraculous transformations that I've experienced myself.

    1. Low energy levels --I used to be exhausted all the time for no reason. Now I really do have a much better energy level. I don't feel like I'm always dragging through the day, I get 7-8 hours of GOOD sleep a night (no waking up constantly), and I just FEEL better! I've never felt like I've had this much energy. I've stopped sleeping in til 12 or 1 in the afternoon, I'm up and working out by 10 on the weekends.
    2. Depression/low self-esteem/anxiety - I feel like a million bucks :) I admit, I love a little attention, and I think the boost in self-confidence is the reason for it. I still want to lose more and I still have chunky legs and a tummy to get rid of, but it doesn't matter because I already feel much better about how I look.
    3. Body aches -- Gone... except from the satisfying burn after a good workout
    6. Increased risk for developing Diabetes, heart disease and cancer, especially given my family history - My whole family has a terrible history of heart disease, I'm happy that I've reduced that risk by quite a bit from losing weight.
    7. Snoring, sleep apnea, night sweats, difficulty sleeping - I apparently still snore... haha. But I sleep much better now.
    8. Going from a Size 4/6 to 14/16 -- I went from 16/18 to a 8/10 now. It's SO much better to shop... I love it!
    9. Back fat, muffin top, flabby arms, double chin - Gone, Going, Going, Gone... much better in taking pictures.
    10. I can actually feel my thighs rubbing together when I walk - it gets better, trust me. I don't get a rash or anything from wearing skirts now, they only rub a bit and some deodorant there takes care of the problem.
    13. Can't wear my wedding rings anymore - I can't wear my class ring anymore... because it's TOO BIG! (I'm not married)
    16. Never wanting to go swimming for fear of being seen in a bathing suit (gasp!) - I wore a bikini for the first time in my life this summer... enough said :)
    17. Struggling every morning to find something that sort of fits, doesn't feel too tight and uncomfortable, and doesn't look too hideous - After a few shopping trips, I now love my closet and it loves me back... haha
    18. Avoiding events where I haven't seen people in some time (... my hasn't SHE put on a lot of weight!) - I relish in getting to see people I haven't seen in a while, because I want to surprise them and see their reaction to how much weight I've lost.
    19. Difficulty in performing the simplest things, like putting on socks, tying shoes, polishing my toenails, standing up from a squatting position - Definitely gets easier, especially with the strength training I've done to built up some muscle.
    21. Avoiding clothes shopping, especially bathing suits and undergarments (and I used to LOVE to shop for clothes!) - Again, was a shopaholic but now I'm even more of one! It's so much nicer buying size 10 pants and size S or M tops!
    23. The feeling of someone else's thigh next to mine when I'm sitting on the bus, and knowing that it's not because the OTHER person is fat! - Haha... I can relate to that one... I went on a plane across the country over Labor Day and I've never felt so comfy or roomy in an airplane seat before.

    Hopefully this is a bit of motivation to keep going to reach your goals!
  • barbarella
    barbarella Posts: 609 Member
    First of all, BRAVO to you for sharing your story! :flowerforyou:
    Not so easy to put ourselves out there... but that's what this site is for! :love:

    Do you know why you gained so much weight? Besides the usual "just because", could there be any medical reasons? Like perimenopause perhaps? Reason I ask is I believe that had a lot to do with my own weight gain, starting in my late 40's. Everybody's different, but heading towards menopause could be a factor in weight gain. wheee....... :-)

    Anyway, back to your list. I would say these numbers I can relate to:
    1 - 5: Exercise helps all of these!
    9: Fat was collecting in weird places like back of neck, arm pits & chest. Weight training takes it off!
    15-17: Feeling lousy & can't find anything to wear sucks!
    19: Terrible time with that one! Fibroids was a big reason for my distended belly!

    After losing 30-35 lbs., I finally felt human again, comfortable in my own skin! Took a lot of effort & hard work but the pay off is worth it! I'm struggling again to lose about 15 more lbs. and regain body strength & stamina. Takes longer as we get older!

    Best of luck to you! You CAN do it! GO Girl! :bigsmile: :drinker: :flowerforyou:
  • batty5
    batty5 Posts: 193
    You are definitely in the right place, so much support from lots of lovely people. Remember you ONLY have 50 lbs to lose which is a lot less than many people here. I gained 56 lbs during a prolonged period of ill health, my general health is good I rarely pick up bugs etc but I have a lot of other health problems which cannot be cured. Last year I had major back surgery & in an attempt to recover I now swim as fast as I can for about 6 hours a week & have decided that despite my meds saying they "may cause weight gain" I am determined to lose weight. My journey is slow & far from easy as even though I stick to my 1200 calories even when exercising I do not always see a loss.
    All your reasons are perfect examples of why you want to lose weight if you keep them in mind I am sure you will be successful but remember if one day you eat a little more you can always adjust downwards the next day. Losing weight is all about frame of mind I am sure, if you have the right mindset you will be successful.
    Remember that you are worth it & you deserve it. Good luck, feel fee to add me for support.
  • lloydrt
    lloydrt Posts: 1,121 Member
    I lost my symptoms of exercise asthma
    I dropped my blood pressure to 110 / 65
    I am stopping my blood pressure medicine in Dec
    I can now stay on a Tread Mill one and a half hours
    I can now wear 38 inch waist pants, and now working towards 36
    I am not out of breath running to answer the phone
    I really like how I feel when I glide around, as opposed to how I used to feel when I walked
    Im not ashamed to go to my Drs office and get weighed
    I am now planning on going to my cousins daughter wedding in Feb in La, and not be ashamed of what I look like in front of the realatives

    Im not so scared of going to have any routine procedures done if necessary, like dying under anasthesia,

    Im proud of myself and all the really cool people who support each other..........

    Good luck, Lloyd
  • fernelia91
    fernelia91 Posts: 10
    Wow! Thanks to all of you for your kind words, support and advice. I joined the website in July, but only as an observer and not as a participant. I just started tracking my food/exercise and stats last week, and only just mustered up the courage to post on the boards yesterday. I'm very impressed with the level of support in this community. I'm also thriled that I've lost 2.2 lbs. in a week!

    I loved reading about how much better you all feel (and thanks especially to "00trayn" for giving her specific examples on every one of my items!). You are all to be congratulated on your successes.

    And "batty5", I do recognize that there is a positive side to all of this, which is that 50 lbs. isn't a lot of weight to have to lose when compared to others. Thanks for reminding me of that.

    "barbarella", in answer to your question about the why. There are a number of reasons: the everyday stresses of a management job, running a household, raising a family and nurturing my relationships; turning 40; loving red wine a little too much and worrying about the world around me are all likely contributors. My doctor ran some tests a couple of years ago (while I was still overweight but not as far gone as I am now), and ruled out Diabetes, hypothyroidism and other possible health issues. But I am definitely beginning to show symptoms of perimenopause, and am convinced that some of the items on my list are attributable to these. I should also say that the "fat" gene is pretty prominent in my family. I think I've managed to rule out medical conditions as the root cause, and believe it's more lifestyle, ageing and genetics.

    Thanks again for your posts. Hope to see more!!
  • kennedar
    kennedar Posts: 306 Member
    My biggest one has been infertility. Doctors do not take us as seriously because of my weight, so it has been hard to get the help we need and for them to understand that there is a problem. I am hoping that I have lost some of the weight and am in the "overweight" category instead of "obese" by our first specialist appointment.
  • fernelia91
    fernelia91 Posts: 10
    I lost my symptoms of exercise asthma
    I dropped my blood pressure to 110 / 65
    I am stopping my blood pressure medicine in Dec
    I can now stay on a Tread Mill one and a half hours
    I can now wear 38 inch waist pants, and now working towards 36
    I am not out of breath running to answer the phone
    I really like how I feel when I glide around, as opposed to how I used to feel when I walked
    Im not ashamed to go to my Drs office and get weighed
    I am now planning on going to my cousins daughter wedding in Feb in La, and not be ashamed of what I look like in front of the realatives

    Im not so scared of going to have any routine procedures done if necessary, like dying under anasthesia,

    Im proud of myself and all the really cool people who support each other..........

    Good luck, Lloyd
    ***********************************

    My list seems so superficial compared to some of the issues you've had to face Lloyd. I am humbled, and sincerely congratulate you on your accomplishments!
  • mcpherson4
    mcpherson4 Posts: 287 Member
    Wed 09/15/10 07:12 AMTo give you some positive feedback from the other side of things... I was 75 pounds over a healthy weight. I've now lost 53 of those pounds and my body fat percentage has really decreased so I look even smaller than that. I can very much relate to most of that list. Here are some of the miraculous transformations that I've experienced myself.

    1. Low energy levels --I used to be exhausted all the time for no reason. Now I really do have a much better energy level. I don't feel like I'm always dragging through the day, I get 7-8 hours of GOOD sleep a night (no waking up constantly), and I just FEEL better! I've never felt like I've had this much energy. I've stopped sleeping in til 12 or 1 in the afternoon, I'm up and working out by 10 on the weekends.
    2. Depression/low self-esteem/anxiety - I feel like a million bucks :) I admit, I love a little attention, and I think the boost in self-confidence is the reason for it. I still want to lose more and I still have chunky legs and a tummy to get rid of, but it doesn't matter because I already feel much better about how I look.
    3. Body aches -- Gone... except from the satisfying burn after a good workout
    6. Increased risk for developing Diabetes, heart disease and cancer, especially given my family history - My whole family has a terrible history of heart disease, I'm happy that I've reduced that risk by quite a bit from losing weight.
    7. Snoring, sleep apnea, night sweats, difficulty sleeping - I apparently still snore... haha. But I sleep much better now.
    8. Going from a Size 4/6 to 14/16 -- I went from 16/18 to a 8/10 now. It's SO much better to shop... I love it!
    9. Back fat, muffin top, flabby arms, double chin - Gone, Going, Going, Gone... much better in taking pictures.
    10. I can actually feel my thighs rubbing together when I walk - it gets better, trust me. I don't get a rash or anything from wearing skirts now, they only rub a bit and some deodorant there takes care of the problem.
    13. Can't wear my wedding rings anymore - I can't wear my class ring anymore... because it's TOO BIG! (I'm not married)
    16. Never wanting to go swimming for fear of being seen in a bathing suit (gasp!) - I wore a bikini for the first time in my life this summer... enough said :)
    17. Struggling every morning to find something that sort of fits, doesn't feel too tight and uncomfortable, and doesn't look too hideous - After a few shopping trips, I now love my closet and it loves me back... haha
    18. Avoiding events where I haven't seen people in some time (... my hasn't SHE put on a lot of weight!) - I relish in getting to see people I haven't seen in a while, because I want to surprise them and see their reaction to how much weight I've lost.
    19. Difficulty in performing the simplest things, like putting on socks, tying shoes, polishing my toenails, standing up from a squatting position - Definitely gets easier, especially with the strength training I've done to built up some muscle.
    21. Avoiding clothes shopping, especially bathing suits and undergarments (and I used to LOVE to shop for clothes!) - Again, was a shopaholic but now I'm even more of one! It's so much nicer buying size 10 pants and size S or M tops!
    23. The feeling of someone else's thigh next to mine when I'm sitting on the bus, and knowing that it's not because the OTHER person is fat! - Haha... I can relate to that one... I went on a plane across the country over Labor Day and I've never felt so comfy or roomy in an airplane seat before.

    Hopefully this is a bit of motivation to keep going to reach your goals!

    Absolutely love this, Sara!!!! How inspiring! Think I will copy and keep! Great motivation! Thank you so much for sharing! xxxxxxx Wendy
  • Sara1978
    Sara1978 Posts: 213 Member
    I can relate to a lot of those points-- particularly point two with the depression, anxiety and low self-esteem. There was a huge change in mental health that came with my improved physical health. I've been diagnosed with depression and social anxiety, and being overweight exacerbated both. I was never obese, but I was overweight, and in my mind I was very hard on myself.

    Part of my social anxiety disorder is tending to feel (irrationally) that people are judging me. When I was heavier, I would always imagine that strangers were judging me based on how I looked. I hated going to parties or out to eat, because I thought people would judge me while I was eating. I hated exercising because I thought people would judge me while I was exercising if I was unable to keep up with them. I hated shopping for clothing because I didn't want to have to take a size 10 off the rack. I was basically in a little bubble where all I could stand to do was go to work, hang out with a tiny circle of friends, and sit around at home. Now that I'm a normal weight, I'm not nearly as overwhelmed in social environments. I *enjoy* eating at a restaurant or a party these days-- I can even have a slice of birthday cake or an ice cream cone when I'm out without feeling that everyone must think I have no self-control.

    My self-esteem has increased by leaps and bounds. I like having my photograph taken now. I've actually started to feel *pretty* sometimes, and that's led me to do things I never thought were necessary before-- like getting a nice haircut for myself, wearing make-up sometimes, and trying to take better care of my skin and my clothes. All of that always seemed silly before since it felt like I was just trying to decorate something that looked gross-- like sticking a new coat of paint on a house that was falling apart. Now I feel like I'm making something nice look a little bit nicer.

    I honestly feel like I'm a different person on the inside now than I was in May when I started all of this.
  • curvykent
    curvykent Posts: 140 Member
    The honesty in your post is the first step, it's admiting out loud that you are aware, responsible, and willing. Good for you! For a number of reasons (getting lazy after high school, enjoying too much fast food, steroid medication for uncontrolled asthma, depression/binge eating, etc) I packed on 68 pounds! I dropped 18 pounds then got pregnant, packed on 30 pounds and now I've lost about 27 of those. It can be daunting. And although I still have 52 pounds to lose I have already noticed some amazing changes, both physically and mentally.
    I can walk 4 miles in under an hour and I'm not drenched in sweat
    I can do poses in yoga that some of the real thin women can't do (egoism, i know. but don't we all compare ourselves to each other? and honestly it gives me a boost in cofidence that i need)
    I've gone from a size 16 and snug around the waist to a 12
    I've been told that my bum looks nice and I've got my hourglass shape back
    The fat under my arm pits isn't as bulgy
    My stretch marks are pale and not as noticeable
    I'm willing to get in a bathing suit. I went white water rafting with a bunch of thin bikini wearing girls and I actually enjoyed myself.
    My sex drive is coming back. WOO HOO!

    So, don't sell yourself short. What you might consider a small weight loss might make a HUGE difference in the way you feel. It has for me :)

    You've found a great tool, this site is amazing. Good luck!
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