wanting to have baby but feel like I am out of luck

Options
ampage25
ampage25 Posts: 9 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
To start off, I am 32. I have a 4 y.o. son and after I had my son, we went through a horrid amount of stress. Without going through all the horrid details, it resulted in a good amount of weight gain for myself along with a whole new world of depression that I was not familiar with. I have been treated for the depression and am feeling much better, but my weight has been out of control.

I am happy to say that I am not 53 lbs down from my highest weight (yay) but we would like to start thinking about having another child. I have had a suspicion for awhile that maybe I wasn't ovulating or that something wasn't right with my monthly cycle. Too scared to find out, I waited on going to the doctor until my actual yearly exam was scheduled. I guess I just didn't want anymore bad news. For about a year I did not have a period at all and my OB/GYN told me that she suggested that I lose weight. Well, I got my period back but now it is 35-38 days long and very heavy.

So I had my yearly exam this past Monday and had myself fully prepared for them to tell me that I was going to have to have tests for hormonal imbalances or PCOS (although I don't really have symptoms of that) or maybe even endometriosis. (my office has a few doctors so I was seeing another one of the doctors this time around) When I started telling him about my period and the amount of time between them and how heavy they were, he didn't even seem concerned. He just said, well if you aren't pregnant in 4-6 months we can put you on Clomid.

On the paperwork that they handed me after my appointment though, I noticed that the doctor wrote that more than likely I am having anovulatory cycles. I guess I am just a little concerned about why he didn't want to find out why. I mean, did he just assume that if I keep losing weight it would possibly regulate itself out? When I had the "exam" he said everything seemed normal, but I am still really upset and scared. I am not getting any younger and am really worried that something is wrong. Should I get a second opinion? Help?

Replies

  • lstpaul
    lstpaul Posts: 2,013 Member
    Options
    Have you tried ovulation test strips to see if you are ovulating? they are pretty inexpensive and you can buy them over-the-counter at Walgreens, Target, etc. With my second child, it was taking awhile to get pregnant until I started using ovulation strips to know exactly when we needed to work on getting pregnant (if you know what I mean :wink: ). Once I knew the optimum days - it took no time at all!
    Also, I would try a new doctor. it doesn't sound like this one took your concerns very seriously.
  • bokodasu
    bokodasu Posts: 629 Member
    Options
    The doctor is not taking you seriously. Find one who will. Sadly, it may take a few tries, most of them suck. And if you're overweight, a depressingly large percentage of them will just tell you to lose weight and spend exactly zero time figuring out what your real problem is.

    Oh, and have you read "Taking Charge of Your Fertility"? It's a great resource and will give you a good base to go in and say what you want the doctor to look at and why.
  • soupandcookies
    soupandcookies Posts: 212 Member
    Options
    I don't understand why your doctor would think you're anovulatory if you are getting a period. A long cycle doesn't mean you're not ovulating. I am anovulatory, and I don't get a period at all. It is possible to be anovulatory and still get a period, but it's not exactly a common thing. Have you had bloodwork done? Also, as someone who is anovulatory and has 3 kids, I can say, from experience, that it is absolutely possible to have children, without having normal cycles. I took Clomid, to induce ovulation, and conceived all 3 of my kids very quickly. I obviously can't speak to your situation, specifically, but I would not lose hope, if I were you. There are so many options out there! Good luck!
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    Options
    You have to stand up for yourself! Call the doctor or make another appointment so you can talk face to face. Tell him you're still concerned and keep asking questions until you're satisifed with the answers. Or go see your regular OB/GYN instead as that may make you more comfortable and confident in his/her answers.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    Options
    1) Call your doctor and ask, we can't give you answers but he can.

    2) Weight fluctuations can greatly impact period regularity.

    3) You didn't received your period for a pretty decent time, your body needs time to reregulate and that may be what he's waiting for.

    4) see number 1
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    Options
    you need doctors- not internet computer jockeys. (and I"m serious about my computer jockeying ;) wink wink)

    that being said I have no idea why in the world you would want a third child- so I'd say LUCKY YOU all the unprotected sex you want.

    Babies are icky but sex is awesome LOL.

    but no seriously- go see another doctor- your's sounds like an idiot thus far.
  • emjean76
    emjean76 Posts: 116 Member
    Options
    Go see a different doctor. This one wasn't listening to you. Of course, general health advice would be to lose weight, but you were looking for a specific answer and he didn't even attempt to get you answers. If you have endometriosis you need to know because the older you get the worse it will get and if you want to have more kids, you need to get started ASAP. Take it from someone who knows.
  • rosellasweet
    rosellasweet Posts: 163 Member
    Options
    The doctor is not taking you seriously. Find one who will. Sadly, it may take a few tries, most of them suck. And if you're overweight, a depressingly large percentage of them will just tell you to lose weight and spend exactly zero time figuring out what your real problem is.

    Oh, and have you read "Taking Charge of Your Fertility"? It's a great resource and will give you a good base to go in and say what you want the doctor to look at and why.

    This. My doctor told me to lose weight and he wouldn't even test me to see if I had PCOS because it was "unescessary." It's not like I have some symptoms or anything :p
  • nickalow11
    nickalow11 Posts: 99 Member
    Options
    We had trouble conceiving child #3 and the doc was adamant, since I wasn't over 35, that I had to try for a full year before they'd intervene at all. I think you're doing ok that the doc is willing to re-evaluate after 6 months. Hang in there!
  • Chokis
    Chokis Posts: 131
    Options
    Is this just your regular doctor or an RE? With all of your problems you need to see an RE. You're just wasting your time with a family doctor, they don't do squat. Save your time and get a referral to an RE.
  • claquettes
    claquettes Posts: 3 Member
    Options
    I don't understand why your doctor would think you're anovulatory if you are getting a period. A long cycle doesn't mean you're not ovulating. I am anovulatory, and I don't get a period at all. It is possible to be anovulatory and still get a period, but it's not exactly a common thing. Have you had bloodwork done? Also, as someone who is anovulatory and has 3 kids, I can say, from experience, that it is absolutely possible to have children, without having normal cycles. I took Clomid, to induce ovulation, and conceived all 3 of my kids very quickly. I obviously can't speak to your situation, specifically, but I would not lose hope, if I were you. There are so many options out there! Good luck!

    You can, in fact, be anovulatory and have still have a period. It's fairly common among early 20-somethings and people with recent weight changes. I would regularly have cycles that were 35-47 days, all anovulatory. Progesterin regimens of ~10 days each month can keep the cycle regular, but other than that, there's not much you can do. If OP is indeed anovulatory, her cycles will likely become ovulatory as she continues to lose weight, but it's also possible that they won't until her weight stabilizes a bit. Weight change, no matter if it is gain or loss, can affect your cycles in many ways. That's why the first questions OB/GYNs usually as is, "Have you gained or lost any weight recently?"

Categories