Looking for active people needing to lose 100+ lbs

I am new here and have over and around a 100lbs to lose. I come here on a daily basis even though I just joined last week. Although this seems very promising it has been very difficult to control my diet and some motivation every now an then is helpful. Even though I am struggling I have decided not to give up on this so I can say for sure that I am motivated but I still have a long way to go. Feel free to add me.

I am one of those people. I weighed 130 to 140 most of my life. even dropped to 120 in my 20s. but it didnt look good on me. Now... Im 50 yrs old and weigh 230. I know it all started when I became very stressed and my daughter was diagonised bi polar..She ultimatey took her own life while in the hospital. The one place i thought she would have been safe. If only I knew then what I know now. Well... my heart broke and besides fixing my head and my heart.. my body was not a priortiy. I was just trying to get up everday and take care of my youngest son and my daughter... I have four children. So, I had 3 teenagers and a toddler and going thru a divorce while my daughter was going thru the bipolar medication changes etc.

She past in 2005. I feel like the wet wool blanket is off of my head and I am feeling better. Noticed there is colors in the sky and the fresh air. Then I stepped in the mirror... HOLY CRAP.. who is this?? I didnt realize I had mirrors that were only neck high. So... my brain has had to catch up with this mess I have my body in now.

I was athletic growing up and always did something to stay in shape until my life was changed when Erika passed. Okay... now..I dont have 5 10 or even 20 lbs to go. I have a lot. My body looks so different acts different and I refuse to give in to aging and just let it be. I want to be healthy and live to be at least 107. But wont make it like this.

My blood pressure is too high.. my cholesteral is in the 200s and I have other issues. Just not want I want for myself and the example I need to set for my children. yes 100 lbs. and I dont know how to work this goal... 10 lbs at a time? 20 lbs?? whats a good way to look at this and be motivated instead of defeated. Thats a lot of weight I have put on...
any ideas or successes out there or whats working for those for you who are doing this??? thanks for the help and reading this. i decided to put it out there. not making an excuse.. just wanted you to know the background to help understand.