Ex weightloss consultant apologises to everyone

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/an-open-apology-to-all-of-my-weightloss-clients/story-fni0fiyv-1226701219108

Wow so very true and powerful reading from one of those who used to be a weightloss consultant!! The sudden realisation that she came to!! edited: this is not me :wink:

I WORKED at a popular weight loss company for three years. I loved my job there. I LOVED my clients. I loved making a connection and sharing my knowledge. And I learned a lot about nutrition, about dieting and weight loss and what works and what doesn't.

My job was to be a weight loss consultant, and I learned that job very well. I can design a 1200 calorie meal plan, tell you which activities are most likely to make the number on the scale go down, and how many carbs are in a cup of rice. I can talk the diet game like it's my business...because it was. Volumise with vegetables. Don't go too long in between meals. Start with a bowl of broth-based soup. Are you drinking enough water? Did you exercise enough? Did you exercise too much? Let's look at your food journal...

This is not an anti-weight loss company post (although I could write that too). It's a letter to each and every woman that I unknowingly wronged. My heart is beating a little bit faster as I write this, and so I know this needs to be said. The words have been playing in my head for months. Sometimes it just takes time for me to get up the courage to say the right thing.

So here goes:

"Dear Former Weight Loss Clients (you know who you are):

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry because I put you on a 1200 calorie diet and told you that was healthy. I'm sorry because when you were running 5x a week, I encouraged you to switch from a 1200 calorie diet to a 1500 calorie diet, instead of telling you that you should be eating a hell of a lot more than that. I'm sorry because you were breastfeeding and there's no way eating those 1700 calories a day could have been enough for both you and your baby. I'm sorry because you were gluten intolerant and so desperate to lose weight that you didn't put that on your intake form. But you mentioned it to me later, and I had no idea the damage you were doing to your body. I'm sorry because I think I should have known. I think I should have been educated better before I began to tell all of you what was right or wrong for your body.

I'm sorry because I made you feel like a failure and so you deliberately left a message after the center had closed, telling me you were quitting. I thought you were awesome and gorgeous, and I'm sorry because I never told you that. I'm sorry because you came in telling me you liked to eat organic and weren't sure about all the chemicals in the food, and I made up some BS about how it was a "stepping stone." I'm sorry because many of you had thyroid issues and the LAST thing you should have been doing was eating a gluten-filled, chemically-laden starvation diet. I'm sorry because by the time I stopped working there, I wouldn't touch that food, yet I still sold it to you.

I'm sorry because it's only years later that I realise just how unhealthy a 1200 calorie diet was. I stayed on a 1200-1500 calorie diet for years, so I have the proof in myself. Thyroid issues, mood swings, depression, headaches ... oh and gluten intolerance that seemed to "kick in" after about a month of eating the pre-packaged food. Was it a coincidence? Maybe.

I'm sorry because you had body dysmorphic disorder, and it was so painful to hear the things you said about yourself. You looked like a model, and all of my other clients were intimidated by you, asked me why you were there because clearly you didn't need to lose weight. And yet you would sit in my office and cry, appalled that a man might see you naked and be disturbed by the fat that didn't actually exist. I'm sorry because you should have been seeing a therapist, not a weight loss consultant.

I'm sorry because you were young and so beautiful and only there because your mother thought you needed to lose weight. And because there were too many of you like that. Girls who knew you were fine, but whose mothers pushed that belief out of you until you thought like she did. Until you thought there was something wrong with you. And the one time I confronted your mother, you simply got switched to a different consultant. I think I should have made more of a stink, but I didn't. I'm sorry because you were in high school and an athlete, and I pray that you weren't screwed up by that 1500 calorie diet. Seriously, world? Seriously? A teenage girl walks in with no visible body fat and lots of muscle tone, tells you she's a runner and is happy with her weight ... but her mother says she's fat and has to lose weight and so we help her do just that. As an individual, as women, as a company, hell, as a nation, we don't stand up for that girl? What is wrong with us? There ain't nothing right about that. Nothing.

I'm sorry because every time you ate something you "shouldn't" or ate more than you "should," I talked about "getting back on the bandwagon." I cringe now every time someone uses that phrase. When did the way we eat become a bandwagon? When did everyone stop eating and become professional dieters? I'm sorry because I get it now. If you're trying to starve your body by eating fewer calories than it needs, of course it's going to fight back. I used to tell you that then, when you wanted to eat less than 1200 calories a day. The problem was, I thought 1200 was enough. I thought that was plenty to support a healthy body. Why did I believe that for so long? I'm sorry because I wasn't trying to trick you or play games to get your money. I believed the lies we were fed as much as you did.

And it wasn't just the company feeding them to me. It was the doctors and registered dietitians on the medical advisory board. It was the media and magazines confirming what I was telling my clients. A palm-sized portion of lean chicken with half a sweet potato and a salad was PLENTY. No matter that you had "cravings" afterwards. Cravings are a sign of underlying emotional issues. Yeah, sure they are. I'm a hypnotherapist with a past history of binge eating disorder. I KNOW cravings are a sign of underlying emotional issues. Except when they're not. Except when they're a sign that your body needs more food and you're ignoring it. Then they're a sign that your 1200 calorie diet is horse****. Then they're a sign that you've been played.

And that's mostly why I'm sorry. Because I've been played for years, and so have you, and inadvertently, I fed into the lies you've been told your whole life. The lies that say that being healthy means nothing unless you are also thin. The lies that say that you are never enough, that your body is not a beautiful work of art, but rather a piece of clay to be moulded by society's norms until it becomes a certain type of sculpture. And even then, it is still a work in progress.

I owe you an apology, my former client and now friend, who I helped to lose too much weight. Who I watched gain the weight back, plus some. Because that's what happens when you put someone on a 1200 calorie diet. But I didn't know. If you're reading this, then I want you to know that you have always been beautiful. And that all these fad diets are crap meant to screw with your metabolism so that you have to keep buying into them. I think now that I was a really good weight loss consultant. Because I did exactly what the company wanted (but would never dare say). I helped you lose weight and then gain it back, so that you thought we were the solution and you were the failure. You became a repeat client and we kept you in the game. I guess I did my job really well.

And now I wonder, did I do more harm than good? When I left, you all wrote me cards and sent me flowers. I still have those cards, the ones that tell me how much I helped you, how much I cared. But I'm friends with some of you on Facebook now, and I look at your photos and you look happy. And beautiful. And not because you lost weight since I saw you last. But because I see YOU now. You. Not a client sitting in my chair, asking for my assistance in becoming what society wants. But you, a smart and lovely woman, who really doesn't need some random company telling her there's something wrong with her.

So I'm sorry because when you walked in to get your meal plan, I should have told you that you were beautiful. I should have asked you how you FELT. Were you happy? Did you feel physically fit? Were you able to play with your kids? There were so many of you who never needed to lose a pound, and some of you who could have gained some. And maybe sometimes I told you that. But not enough. Not emphatically. Because it was my job to let you believe that making the scale go down was your top priority. And I did my job well.

I am sorry because many of you walked in healthy and walked out with disordered eating, disordered body image, and the feeling that you were a "failure." None of you ever failed. Ever. I failed you. The weight loss company failed you. Our society is failing you.

Just eat food. Eat real food, be active, and live your life. Forget all the diet and weight loss nonsense. It's really just that. Nonsense.

And I can't stop it. But I can stop my part in it. I won't play the weight loss game anymore. I won't do it to my body, and I won't help you do it to yours. That's it. End game.

Iris"

This post originally appeared on yourfairyangel.com

Replies

  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    I saw this on the Huffington Post last weekend, and I thought it was a powerfully written piece. Having tried Jenny Craig (not necessarily the company the writer was referring to) the food was terrible and I felt like I was starving all the time. I made it about 5 days before I quit. I was super active at the time too, and was probably only eating 1/3 or less of my TDEE. It was horrible.
  • WeightHacker
    WeightHacker Posts: 260 Member
    bump~ loved it and wanted to get back to it in the future for reminder~
  • obwize
    obwize Posts: 102
    This is beautiful.
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    Oh so true way too often. Thanks for sharing it friend.
  • JessC_28
    JessC_28 Posts: 1 Member
    Wow, that was a powerful posting. I have never been to a dietician, but have definitely checked out a lot of books and browsed endless sites to fine that "perfect" plan to help me lose weight. And the only reason I'm up now and reading about it is because I was thinking about it and what kind of goals I needed to set for myself that I couldn't sleep and had to get it down before I could. In the end, it's going to be about me, and at what point I'm happy with my body not society.

    And to that end, that's what my goals are going to be based on. I will never be that size 2, and I don't want to be. I just want to be happy being myself. I'm tired of my body feeling out of balance and disgusting. So to this, I will begin my journey of finding that peace and balance within myself, for myself.
  • KarenJanine
    KarenJanine Posts: 3,497 Member
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1075705-apology-from-a-weight-loss-consultant?hl=Consultant+apology#posts-16549534

    There was this post a few days ago.

    The writer is sorry but she's still getting new clients to part with cash as part of her new improved weight loss program. So probably not *that* sorry.
  • EDesq
    EDesq Posts: 1,527 Member
    Sooo, WHAT? Are your New Sorry's a part of your New "knowledge" Base? GUESS what, you WILL BE Back because there will be MORE Sorry's! You are/were/is just a part of the whole out of touch Allopathic Medical System that knows NOTHING about Health, Healing and Prevention of Disease, because that's what this is all about HEALTH. What you Eat is the Greatest part of WELLNESS. So, unfortunately what you have learned since your days as a "gym teacher" are still part of that messed up system. Get outta the "BOX" Go Naturopathic/Herbalist/Health/Life and then see where you are.
  • GabriellaMaria
    GabriellaMaria Posts: 150 Member
    http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/an-open-apology-to-all-of-my-weightloss-clients/story-fni0fiyv-1226701219108

    Wow so very true and powerful reading from one of those who used to be a weightloss consultant!! The sudden realisation that she came to!! edited: this is not me :wink:

    I WORKED at a popular weight loss company for three years. I loved my job there. I LOVED my clients. I loved making a connection and sharing my knowledge. And I learned a lot about nutrition, about dieting and weight loss and what works and what doesn't.

    My job was to be a weight loss consultant, and I learned that job very well. I can design a 1200 calorie meal plan, tell you which activities are most likely to make the number on the scale go down, and how many carbs are in a cup of rice. I can talk the diet game like it's my business...because it was. Volumise with vegetables. Don't go too long in between meals. Start with a bowl of broth-based soup. Are you drinking enough water? Did you exercise enough? Did you exercise too much? Let's look at your food journal...

    This is not an anti-weight loss company post (although I could write that too). It's a letter to each and every woman that I unknowingly wronged. My heart is beating a little bit faster as I write this, and so I know this needs to be said. The words have been playing in my head for months. Sometimes it just takes time for me to get up the courage to say the right thing.

    So here goes:

    "Dear Former Weight Loss Clients (you know who you are):

    I'm sorry.

    I'm sorry because I put you on a 1200 calorie diet and told you that was healthy. I'm sorry because when you were running 5x a week, I encouraged you to switch from a 1200 calorie diet to a 1500 calorie diet, instead of telling you that you should be eating a hell of a lot more than that. I'm sorry because you were breastfeeding and there's no way eating those 1700 calories a day could have been enough for both you and your baby. I'm sorry because you were gluten intolerant and so desperate to lose weight that you didn't put that on your intake form. But you mentioned it to me later, and I had no idea the damage you were doing to your body. I'm sorry because I think I should have known. I think I should have been educated better before I began to tell all of you what was right or wrong for your body.

    I'm sorry because I made you feel like a failure and so you deliberately left a message after the center had closed, telling me you were quitting. I thought you were awesome and gorgeous, and I'm sorry because I never told you that. I'm sorry because you came in telling me you liked to eat organic and weren't sure about all the chemicals in the food, and I made up some BS about how it was a "stepping stone." I'm sorry because many of you had thyroid issues and the LAST thing you should have been doing was eating a gluten-filled, chemically-laden starvation diet. I'm sorry because by the time I stopped working there, I wouldn't touch that food, yet I still sold it to you.

    I'm sorry because it's only years later that I realise just how unhealthy a 1200 calorie diet was. I stayed on a 1200-1500 calorie diet for years, so I have the proof in myself. Thyroid issues, mood swings, depression, headaches ... oh and gluten intolerance that seemed to "kick in" after about a month of eating the pre-packaged food. Was it a coincidence? Maybe.

    I'm sorry because you had body dysmorphic disorder, and it was so painful to hear the things you said about yourself. You looked like a model, and all of my other clients were intimidated by you, asked me why you were there because clearly you didn't need to lose weight. And yet you would sit in my office and cry, appalled that a man might see you naked and be disturbed by the fat that didn't actually exist. I'm sorry because you should have been seeing a therapist, not a weight loss consultant.

    I'm sorry because you were young and so beautiful and only there because your mother thought you needed to lose weight. And because there were too many of you like that. Girls who knew you were fine, but whose mothers pushed that belief out of you until you thought like she did. Until you thought there was something wrong with you. And the one time I confronted your mother, you simply got switched to a different consultant. I think I should have made more of a stink, but I didn't. I'm sorry because you were in high school and an athlete, and I pray that you weren't screwed up by that 1500 calorie diet. Seriously, world? Seriously? A teenage girl walks in with no visible body fat and lots of muscle tone, tells you she's a runner and is happy with her weight ... but her mother says she's fat and has to lose weight and so we help her do just that. As an individual, as women, as a company, hell, as a nation, we don't stand up for that girl? What is wrong with us? There ain't nothing right about that. Nothing.

    I'm sorry because every time you ate something you "shouldn't" or ate more than you "should," I talked about "getting back on the bandwagon." I cringe now every time someone uses that phrase. When did the way we eat become a bandwagon? When did everyone stop eating and become professional dieters? I'm sorry because I get it now. If you're trying to starve your body by eating fewer calories than it needs, of course it's going to fight back. I used to tell you that then, when you wanted to eat less than 1200 calories a day. The problem was, I thought 1200 was enough. I thought that was plenty to support a healthy body. Why did I believe that for so long? I'm sorry because I wasn't trying to trick you or play games to get your money. I believed the lies we were fed as much as you did.

    And it wasn't just the company feeding them to me. It was the doctors and registered dietitians on the medical advisory board. It was the media and magazines confirming what I was telling my clients. A palm-sized portion of lean chicken with half a sweet potato and a salad was PLENTY. No matter that you had "cravings" afterwards. Cravings are a sign of underlying emotional issues. Yeah, sure they are. I'm a hypnotherapist with a past history of binge eating disorder. I KNOW cravings are a sign of underlying emotional issues. Except when they're not. Except when they're a sign that your body needs more food and you're ignoring it. Then they're a sign that your 1200 calorie diet is horse****. Then they're a sign that you've been played.

    And that's mostly why I'm sorry. Because I've been played for years, and so have you, and inadvertently, I fed into the lies you've been told your whole life. The lies that say that being healthy means nothing unless you are also thin. The lies that say that you are never enough, that your body is not a beautiful work of art, but rather a piece of clay to be moulded by society's norms until it becomes a certain type of sculpture. And even then, it is still a work in progress.

    I owe you an apology, my former client and now friend, who I helped to lose too much weight. Who I watched gain the weight back, plus some. Because that's what happens when you put someone on a 1200 calorie diet. But I didn't know. If you're reading this, then I want you to know that you have always been beautiful. And that all these fad diets are crap meant to screw with your metabolism so that you have to keep buying into them. I think now that I was a really good weight loss consultant. Because I did exactly what the company wanted (but would never dare say). I helped you lose weight and then gain it back, so that you thought we were the solution and you were the failure. You became a repeat client and we kept you in the game. I guess I did my job really well.

    And now I wonder, did I do more harm than good? When I left, you all wrote me cards and sent me flowers. I still have those cards, the ones that tell me how much I helped you, how much I cared. But I'm friends with some of you on Facebook now, and I look at your photos and you look happy. And beautiful. And not because you lost weight since I saw you last. But because I see YOU now. You. Not a client sitting in my chair, asking for my assistance in becoming what society wants. But you, a smart and lovely woman, who really doesn't need some random company telling her there's something wrong with her.

    So I'm sorry because when you walked in to get your meal plan, I should have told you that you were beautiful. I should have asked you how you FELT. Were you happy? Did you feel physically fit? Were you able to play with your kids? There were so many of you who never needed to lose a pound, and some of you who could have gained some. And maybe sometimes I told you that. But not enough. Not emphatically. Because it was my job to let you believe that making the scale go down was your top priority. And I did my job well.

    I am sorry because many of you walked in healthy and walked out with disordered eating, disordered body image, and the feeling that you were a "failure." None of you ever failed. Ever. I failed you. The weight loss company failed you. Our society is failing you.

    Just eat food. Eat real food, be active, and live your life. Forget all the diet and weight loss nonsense. It's really just that. Nonsense.

    And I can't stop it. But I can stop my part in it. I won't play the weight loss game anymore. I won't do it to my body, and I won't help you do it to yours. That's it. End game.

    Iris"

    This post originally appeared on yourfairyangel.com
    wow....
    this resonates with me so much...
    my stepmom put me on a 1000 calorie diet when i was 12.....and i have been dieting ever since!!!!
    i have read some real interesting nutrition books, more aobut health than weightloss, and guess what...i still have a weight problem..i still obsess, and i still feel unworthy...
    but on mfp, i have found friends, and people who share my experiences, and at least i dont feel so isolated anymore...
  • Lupercalia
    Lupercalia Posts: 1,857 Member
    I saw this before the media got hold of it--a fitness/health blogger I read had shared it. The author seems to have received really mixed reactions to it, but I thought the letter/apology seemed genuine and I'm glad she put it out there.
  • suzmedder
    suzmedder Posts: 49 Member
    Wow.....I was doing 1200 calories up until a month ago when I started the New Rules for Lifting for Women, which completely blows that theory out of the water.

    Brilliant article!! Thanx for posting :)
  • GabriellaMaria
    GabriellaMaria Posts: 150 Member
    Oh so true way too often. Thanks for sharing it friend.
    agreed!!
  • Not sure if she was really sorry! What is the point in apologizing after many lives were screwed up!!!
  • oOxXxOo
    oOxXxOo Posts: 75 Member
    I worked for Jenny Craig in my early 20s whilst I was studying nursing.
    Honestly the biggest money spinning crock of **** I ever had the pleasure of peddling.
    They are there to make money not to help people. End of story.
  • soupandcookies
    soupandcookies Posts: 212 Member
    I worked for Jenny Craig in my early 20s whilst I was studying nursing.
    Honestly the biggest money spinning crock of **** I ever had the pleasure of peddling.
    They are there to make money not to help people. End of story.

    I worked for Jenny Craig, too, and I agree with you. The food is great, though...
  • I didnt read past this letter just thought it was interesting and it struck a nerve with a few friends that why I posted it. I did have a quick look on here to see if anyone had posted it but didnt look too hard as i was in a hurry.

    After reading more into her blog Im a little unsure whether she is truly sorry or just trying to push something else?
  • lovelylela415
    lovelylela415 Posts: 91 Member
    I owe you an apology, my former client and now friend, who I helped to lose too much weight. Who I watched gain the weight back, plus some. Because that's what happens when you put someone on a 1200 calorie diet. But I didn't know. If you're reading this, then I want you to know that you have always been beautiful. And that all these fad diets are crap meant to screw with your metabolism so that you have to keep buying into them. I think now that I was a really good weight loss consultant. Because I did exactly what the company wanted (but would never dare say). I helped you lose weight and then gain it back, so that you thought we were the solution and you were the failure. You became a repeat client and we kept you in the game. I guess I did my job really well.

    While th while thing is questionable because its selling a product, she does make really great meaningful points including the above.
  • joolywooly33
    joolywooly33 Posts: 421 Member
    WOW!