Building muscle at home?

Thanks very muvh everyone for all the info.

Yes I am not bothered about bulking up overnight, in fact my main aim is to become fitter and healthier, eat more balanced and nutrivious meals and get in superb shape. My ultimate aim is to have a super toned bod (I would say I'm a bit of the way there, my arms are pretty toned and I'm slim just need to rid a small bit of body fat round the middle lol), but am aware this will be a slow process and that is fine.

On average I ho to the gym 4 times a week for an hour and do a combination of cardio 80% and strength 20%. I also try amd do some toning at home as first mentioned which I'm just beginning to introduce weights into to make it more challenging. I also was running 3 miles a couple of times a week but had to give this up when I got shin splints a couple of weeks back. I want to keep the cardio as my overall fitness is important to me, but I will concentrate a more on the strength side of things.

I'll definitely look at all these websites and at the calculator.

So I should up my calories a little but not eat my exercise calories back?
I'll also look into upping my protein, and healthy ways of doing this.

This is going to seem like a really silly question to all of you now, but please bare in mind I'm new to this, I've heard of macros but have no idea what they are, can someone tell me so I don't feel so stupid! :P

Thanks again everyone your input is appreciated

Macros are protein carbs fat

The best way to retain muscle when trying to also lose fat is to do high *intensity* strength training. That means doing things that are quite difficult for YOU to do, or what is usually called "lifting heavy."

Your body is smart. It does what it thinks it needs to do in order to keep you alive. So when you are consistently giving it less calories than it needs to maintain its current condition, it will cannibalize whatever seems wisest in order to provide energy. If you don't send it signals telling it that you need to keep all the muscle you currently possess, it will go after that (because if you are consistently in a deficit it thinks you can't get enough food and initially wants to hold onto fat stores in case you are starving).

The best way to tell it that you need ALL THE MUSCLE is to perform tasks that are VERY difficult. The general consensus is that heavy compound barbell lifts are the best bang for your buck here, as they work your entire body in a fast and efficient manner.

So: Ideal would be strength training with weights 3 or so times a week, full body, doing 3-5 sets of whatever weight you can do 4-6 reps of per set. In the absence of that, bodyweight is better than nothing.

TL;DR--Cut out some cardio, replace with high intensity weight training, and forget "toning" cause it doesn't exist.

I don't particularly want to loose weight, however I do want to loose some body fat that I'm carrying on my tummy, bum, thighs and hips. There isn't loads of it, but it's still there. I also want to get super toned, not particularly 'muscley', but very fit and very toned.
I was eating a small calorie defecit to lpose the body fat (along with cardio and strength) but want to build a bit of muscle at the same time!

Don't worry about getting super muscley. You do not have the testosterone required to build massive muscles. I don't even have the testosterone required to build massive muscles .
Eat at maintenance and lift weights. Your body will recomposition (fat - muscle) itself over time.

Ah right ok, so if I work out enough (and eat at maintenance) my body fat should eventually become muscle?
I thought I'd need to loose the body fat so that you could see the toned muscles that are hidden underneath (can you tell this is all new to me, I've exervised for a while but never really thought any more into it).

So should I up my protein? I'm currently trying to keep at what MFP has set me at (50 something I think), should it be more (I weigh about 125lbs).

Also my current calorie net total goal is 1500, is this about right? I do work a part time office job of about 15-20 hours a week, however I'm an extremely busy person and the rest of my time 7am - 9pm most days is spent on my feet rushing around, usual motherly/household/garden duties plus loads of animals and dogs to walk etc (I don't count any of this as exercise as I do it every day). I was estimating this was about right for a 10% deficit, what does everyone else think? Also sometimes I eat under my net calories sometimes up to 400 under, should I not do this?

When I started this I never thought it would be so complicated!! :P

Yes, if you are eating at maintenance and lifting than your body will use fat cells for energy and you will see more muscle definition. This is a slow process, but it's worth it.
You probably need a little bit more food. My wife is 120 and eats around 1800 for maintenance.
http://iifym.com/iifym-calculator/
This can tell you a little bit better.
I can say that you probably do need to up your protein a a bit. That calculator will tell you exactly, but I'd say around 100g should be adequate.
Don't eat your exercise calories back if you use the calculator.