Totally Frustrated

VanessaFaith
VanessaFaith Posts: 171 Member
in Motivation and Support
Over the past year life has changed so much... For the good and for the bad. As of a year ago I had lost a total of 180 pounds... As soon as I hit that number I was admitted into the hospital for the third time for extremely low potassium... I was malnourished and had lost a significant amount of hair (my own fault... Only taking in a maximum of 800 cals a day at the time). Following this, my little brother took his life (the most difficult thing I've ever been through). That same month I was proposed to and 4 months later was married and moving to VA (a little over 7 hours away from my family, which I'm very close to). With all those life changes came a significant weight gain and total frustration. I'm completely happy and in love with my husband, who is in great shape. At the same time, I have a lot of personal stress (that I try not to discuss too much ) with being away from my family and still dealing with the loss of my brother... Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed, so no need to suggest counseling or anything like that, I just don't know exactly what I need.

Replies

  • Fitfully_me
    Fitfully_me Posts: 647 Member
    I'm sorry to hear of all the sadness you've had to endure. My heart goes out to you.
    Perhaps you're just in need of friends. Have you found a social circle in your new city? Like minded people that you can spend some time with? Surely, they won't replace your family but there's much that can be said about having a "circle".
  • VanessaFaith
    VanessaFaith Posts: 171 Member
    Thank you! I don't really have a circle of friends yet... There are a few from church I talk to, but no one I really relate to aside from church activities.
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    I know you suggest that you do not need some counselling but with the circle of events that you have experienced, maybe it would be helpful to talk to someone?

    Maybe there is someone within the church that you can offload to?

    Whilst I understand and can only try to put my self in your shoes with what you have been through, sometimes, the internet is not a good medium for support?

    Face to face support can be a whole lot better.....making friends is not always easy when you move...maybe speak to who ever runs your church to ask if there is someone you can talk to?
  • MommyisFit
    MommyisFit Posts: 139 Member
    Try meetup.com to meet people in your area. As a SAHM this was a godsend for me!
  • MrsMX
    MrsMX Posts: 98
    Life has many Challenges,
    Ups and Downs and whether we realize it or not We all need to Vent!



    Women love to share news and vent .. It's a part of who we are!

    We all need close friends that we can spill to when the pot starts to boil over
    but when push comes to shove I wonder how many of us truly have that true friend or trust
    in another to not be judged on what can come out ...

    Your human :))x
  • JanMarie2BHealthy
    JanMarie2BHealthy Posts: 159
    You have been through a tremendous about of stress (good and bad) and events in a short period of time. Perhaps that is what you need simply "TIME". Time to perhaps make a new weight loss plan so that you do not end up in the ER again? Time to perhaps reflect, rejoice, mourn, adjust to your new community? Time to perhaps just "be still". It will all work out and things work in very mysterious ways :) Good luck and stay healthy - we can't take care of anyone else if we are not able to be healthy ourselves. :)

    ..
  • Fitfully_me
    Fitfully_me Posts: 647 Member
    Thank you! I don't really have a circle of friends yet... There are a few from church I talk to, but no one I really relate to aside from church activities.

    If you aren't already on it, I'd recommend you check out www.meetup.com. (as I see someone else has suggested) Its a great place to meet existing groups of people with a myriad of likes/loves/hobbies. I know what its like to move... often, so I welcome all the help I can get.

    I bet you'll find an existing group that matches one of your interests. I don't know what part of VA you're in, but when I lived in Va Beach a couple years ago, there were many, many, active groups.
  • lizziecheek
    lizziecheek Posts: 65 Member
    I think everybody offered sage advice. That is a lot of loss and joy. My boyfriend died suddenly the end of 2005 at age 41. About a year later I was in a downward spiral, developed clinical depression that was quite severe and returned to old pattern of binging. I gained over 100 pounds in a very short time and now am trying to get back to a good place.

    One thing that really helped me besides seeing a therapist, and friends was I went to a grief support group. It was really helpful and I meet some really nice people. I am still friends with one of them this many years later.

    Feel free to add me as a friend. I can relate to much of what you are going through.
  • ItsLessOfMe
    ItsLessOfMe Posts: 374 Member
    This is a life long journey sis :) I've been on it with you. I have been gaining weight as well after about 7 family deaths in a row. It's hard. Death has a REAL way of reminding us of what is eternal. That is my focus now. Taking care of my temple and learning how to nourish my soul with His word, because man does not live by bread alone. The scale cannot be my God. The Lord speaks so much about how spiritual discipline is better then physical disciple. I have not attained it yet but I I pressing forward and forgetting the past. Learning how to listen to the Holy Spirit when eating, I'm fasting, and I can't do many of the beastly workouts I used to do because of 2 injuiries BUT I refused to be discouraged,

    I love you, keep pressin
    Mel
  • VanessaFaith
    VanessaFaith Posts: 171 Member
    Thank you all so much!

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