I need support! :(

AimeeBaumgartner
AimeeBaumgartner Posts: 38 Member
in Motivation and Support
I started using MFP and going to the gym a year and a half ago. I lost 60 lbs., but recently gained 20 lbs. back in the last 5 months. I became a stay at home mom in April and the I have been stress eating after dealing with mouthy 8 yr. old and grumpy 2 yr. old who throws screaming fits daily! I'm about to start looking for a job again, because I'm not cut out the be a stay at home mom. I'm also trying to curb my urge to drink beer on the weekend when my husband gets home from work. Has anyone else gone through this loss and then regain???? I'm embarrassed.. I feel like I've let everyone and myself down. Help!

Replies

  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
    I can't say I have anything in common with you except the name. lol my name is also amy. I don't drink. I don't have kids. but let me tell you I can only imagine how hard it is to be a stay at home mom. it's hard work. best of luck to you on your journey! you can do this.
  • lilbearzmom
    lilbearzmom Posts: 600 Member
    Just have to say I completely understand where you're coming from. I only have ONE child and he's 9. I was in between careers this summer (graduated from college in May) and only worked very part time, when I had been working full time/going to school since my son was 3 months old. He drove me crazy this summer- couldn't wait until he went back to school and I found a job. I am also more the work outside the home mother type. I find everyone is happier this way. LOL
  • GBRhusker
    GBRhusker Posts: 32 Member
    Don't feel bad, Aimee, don't be embarassed......just go get the job and get back on the horse! You've already proven you can do it. 99% of luck is found in intention, the other 1% is from eating chocolate. :)
  • Breeli0519
    Breeli0519 Posts: 63 Member
    I understand where you're coming from! I started MFP in June 2012 and did really well for the first 6-8 months, losing about 36 lbs. Then when a series of illnesses sidelined me, I lost my momentum. About the time I was finally recovered, I had a detached retina in my left eye and that prevented me from working or exercising for the last 6 weeks. So I was home with my very spirited 3 year old. While I enjoyed the opportunity to be at home with him, I was so limited with what activities we could do, which frustrated us both and resulted in much waling and gnashing of teeth. I managed to keep the weigh re-gain to a minimum...I regained 5 lbs. This past Thursday, I finally got the "all clear" from my eye doctor and I've started back at the gym and logging my food. Feel free to add me as a friend if you like. We can motivate each other!

    You got this! :)
  • dragonfly123321
    dragonfly123321 Posts: 51 Member
    im a stay at home mom and when my kids were young it was sooo hard My son was very colicky cried constantly weather I was holding him or not. I also felt guilty that I was emotionally drained and physically tired and couldnt keep up with everything . I felt guilty about resting and watching Tv & I started a bad habit of feeling it was okay to watch Tv if I was eating and of course I usually didnt pick a healthy snack But being aware is half the battle & it is hard staying at home doing the same thing over and over and not getting any acknowledgment for what your doing You can do it try not to feel guilty cause that just a bad spiral down
  • Ewa_Maria_M
    Ewa_Maria_M Posts: 3
    Just the fact that you took time to write this and ask for support shows how capable you are of getting back to a more disciplined lifestyle, health-wise. Don't be hard on yourself, don't ever worry about what you ate or did yesterday, or anything in the past, quite frankly, that's fully irrelevant. Today is the first day of the rest of your life - always. Today, get back to eating well, burning more than taking in.

    You might already know this, but I see this all the time with people who had a lot of weight to lose, so I'll mention it just in case (I work in fitness environment): the lighter you are, the lower is your resting metabolic rate, meaning your body needs less energy to keep your body functioning (your liver or heart working, etc). That means you actually have to adjust how many calories you are taking in, because if you stay at the same amount as you did when you were 60 lbs heavier, you might stop losing and start gaining. So reset your values if you haven't already, adjust everything to your current weight.

    One tip that I would give is to think about switching from beer to wine. Wine in general has less calories than beer and what you're craving is that little bit of alcohol that helps you unwind - and they both have it. You'll also feel quite fancy with your wine glass in the evening time :)

    On the kid side, my Mom keeps reminding my brother and me to enjoy our kids - even when things get crazy. They're small and dependent on you for such a brief time, very soon their friends will be by far more important than you. It's hard to think that way when they drive you crazy, but I try to spend some time with them now cause in a few years they won't wanna be around me at all..

    I hope your day improves!
  • AimeeBaumgartner
    AimeeBaumgartner Posts: 38 Member
    Wow! Thank you all for your support! I got kind of teary eyed. The folks on MFP are more supportive than my own friends and family so... Thank you so much! This means a lot to be acknowledged and to feel understood.
  • MrsTits
    MrsTits Posts: 44 Member
    I lost 97lbs in 2011, put it all back on and then some. Starting again is crap but just think how you'd be if you didn't...you'd put the other 40lbs on and then some. Being a mum is really stressful sometimes, mine is 16 now and it doesn't get any easier. Tantrums, attitude, testing the boundaries, slamming doors...doesn't much change with age...urgh. Do you have any hobbies...something you like to do just for yourself that doesn't involve food? I've always seen food at a treat or reward, that's half my problem, the others are lack of willpower and that constant battle in my head. Distraction works quite well but finding something to treat or reward yourself or to use a stress reliever that isn't food based would probably really help! Do you get a break from the kids at all? x
  • LishLash79
    LishLash79 Posts: 562 Member
    I have five kids.. am 33 years old.. and have gone up and down on the scale my whole life (and of course while having kids was even harder). I know how hard it is to be at home with your kids because it can get very mundane, and if you have coliky, stressful kids ( i have) it can make things harder because you are tired and trying to find time for yourself as well.


    Keep with MFP.. try to keep positives in your life.. Try to find time for JUST YOU (and don't feel guilty about it.. take it when you can).

    you are not in this alone.. there are thousands of people on MFP in the same boat...

    feel free to friend me

    you can do this. ;)

    and PS.. no one is cut out to be a stay at home Mom.. lol.. its a friggen hard job.. kudos for be willing to do it. ;)
  • dougilawson
    dougilawson Posts: 1
    I'm a Dad with two kids of a similar age. I don't have the amount of stress you do, but the drinking, comfort eating sounds all too familiar. My solution has been running - I started off really slowly and gently and I can now run 3.5 miles 4/5 times a week. It give me an extra 500 cals per day on run days - and the endorphins melt the stress too - win/win. This is not a flippant response, just my ten cents, exercise (when you find one you can enjoy) seems to make a huge difference.
  • shenson2522
    shenson2522 Posts: 45 Member
    I'm also a stay at home home and it was a BIG adjustment. I had a mouthy 10 year old and a mouthy 14 year old. Well now I have a mouthy 14 year old and my daughter that just started college 1200 miles away. Don't give up on being a stay at home Mom. It is one of the hardest but most rewarding jobs you will ever have. Which is hard to think about when you are listening to your mouthy child and all you think is I really want to leave right now. :) After your oldest goes to school take your youngest to the park or run around in a grassy area. It's amazing how much better toddlers are after they run around outside and then go to sleep. :) If you could walk to a park that would be even better, you get exercise too. If not then while your toddler is sleeping get your work out in. Another fun work out with your toddler is dancing. Pick them up and just dance around. :) Good luck
  • AimeeBaumgartner
    AimeeBaumgartner Posts: 38 Member
    No real break. Grandparents on both sides also have young children so, it's hard for them to babysit when they have kids still in the house! :(
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Oh I so hear you. I'm a SAHM to 5yo twins (who thankfully are starting full day kindergarten this week) and the only thing that has kept my sanity this Summer was going to the gym every day, and it kept the kids busy too because they have babysitting... I was going to classes twice a week or just walking on the treadmill for an hour... BLISS lol. Would that be an option for you? Before that I was just doing workout dvd's while the kids were in school or going for walks, but that wasn't possible when the kids were home.

    Unfortunately I can't work because I wouldn't make enough money to pay for daycare/nanny, but it would make exercising even more difficult too. But I'm not really SAHM material either so it's been hard sometimes (I really lack patience), I just try to use walks and exercise now as my outlet instead of food.

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