I need some serious help!

liquidmelancholy
liquidmelancholy Posts: 2
in Health and Weight Loss
Mine is quite a complicated story..

I would say my normal weight (e.g. before I ever went on a proper diet at all) was always around 9 stone (I'm 5"6.) During a year of unemployment (and going through another one now!) I gained a little over a stone to 10 stone 2. This was through not too eating bad food as such, just more than usual and not doing any exercise.

I remembered the time I was studying for my final uni exams and would be so busy and stressed I'd work through days without stopping to eat lunch. Before I knew it I'd gone from 9 stone to 8 stone 4! So I thought I'd try the "2 meals a day" approach again, this time deliberately, to hopefully go from 10 stone 2 to at least 9 stone again.

Well I did, and I ended up getting down to 8 stone 10. However I did this by not only skipping lunch, but only eating 800 calories a day. Unfortunately I stuck to this diet for 2 and a half years. Then when I met my boyfriend and started eating "normally" at the weekends, I found I obviously was no longer able to stick to 800 calories a day and losing weight each day became harder.

I had to leave my job in October last year, and at that time I was about 8 stone 12. I am now at the grand total of 9 stone 8! In this time I realised my stupid diet was just not good and wasn't working anymore anyway. I tried increasing my calories slowly, starting from 1000 calories a day and my new exercise routine was 30 minutes of yogalates and a min 5 minute spurt on my exercise bike 4 times a week, to hopefully boost my metabolism back into working again.

It would work for a couple of days, then I'd gain for the next few days. I kept increasing my calories and stuck to the exercise routine. I started eating up to 1800 calories, but I'd still gain. So this week in desperation I've tried a range of calories to see what will work - and I've already gained 2 pounds!!

I tried 1300 calories on Monday and I gained, 1800 on Tuesday and I gained, yesterday I ate 2000 calories and I gained. I haven't been doing exercise as have had a very nasty cold which has really knocked me out. So I have absolutely no idea what calories to eat anymore, so that I can lose.

I'm 9 stone 8 now, I just cannot keep going on like this and reach 10 stone..and what if it even doesn't stop there?!

Have I completely ruined my body for life now? I know it was incredibly stupid to stick to an 800 calorie diet for 2 and a half years. Advice and help please :(

Replies

  • Hildy_J
    Hildy_J Posts: 1,050 Member
    You're good, you're good, don't worry.

    You're making positive, sensible changes and you've learned your lessons. Everyone makes mistakes, you just gotta learn from them and move on.

    You're doing exactly the right thing trying out different calorie goals. Exactly. This is how you will find out what works for you.

    The only thing you need to change here is the amount of time you try them for. Meaning - give 1,700 hundred a go for a couple of weeks (or whatever number gives you a slight calorie deficit), see how that goes then reassess after the fortnight. You'll know whether you've lost, gained, stayed the same and how comfortable you've felt. Then take it from there.

    The TDEE-10% calculation may be useful, here?

    Good luck!:flowerforyou:
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
    First off, take a deep breath and relax. Your BMR is about 1400 calories so you need to be eating at least that just so your body can function properly. Next, you don't gain over a day. You need to pick a calorie goal and stick with it for at least 2 to 3 weeks then reassess whether it's working. Weighing daily and deciding if you're gaining or losing doesn't work. There are too many variables at play.

    I'd suggest reading up on BMR, TDEE and filling in your info in MFP, setting a loss rate (I'd suggest no more than 1 pound per week) and sticking to it. Log your food religiously by weighing and measuring everything. Give it 3 weeks and then see if you need to tweak the amount.
  • photojunkie28
    photojunkie28 Posts: 292
    Good job for changing this unhealthy cycle! I know EXACTLY how you feel. I "crash dieted" for a long time as well and didn't figure anything out until my weight came to a screeching halt as well even when I added insane amounts of exercise (which I definitely didn't have the energy for).
    It took me SO LONG to be able to physically eat an appropriate amount because my body wouldn't burn it, everything was stored for the next starvation period. I think I gained like 7 lbs in this "reset" process. They all came back off as my body started to adjust, but I felt absolutely disgusting for quite some time.
    I know its hard not to get discouraged, but try to think about everything in terms of having all the time in the world to get it right. Slow and steady is for sure the way to go. I am working on finding my TDEE again right now for a few weeks and then going to try a cut again because my body still doesn't trust me fully and will usually not let me lose weight in a deficit or only a couple lbs and then nothing anymore.
    I was a 1000-1200 calorie dieter and now Im eating 2600 regularly sometimes more and not gaining. Try to stay positive. My fingers are crossed for a quicker fix for you :)
  • primpixie
    primpixie Posts: 39
    Hi there, you probably have done some damage, but don't dispare! It is reversible, but you have to be sensible. Ask yourself - what weight do I actually want to be and stick to, it needs to be a healthy weight for you and not one that is only achievable by starving yourself (800 cals per day is what movie stars do to lose weight for roles, but they get paid to reek havoc with their bodies and minds - it plays on your brain too).
    You also need to know how much you can consume. Don't change the goal daily, you need a fixed amount over 4 - 8 weeks and keep a proper diary, weighing yourself every 2 weeks, or else you'll get water retention build up an so on, leaving you floundering - as you have been.
    I know all this? I was anorexic as a young teenager and into my early 20's, it's taken me years to adjust to being normal.
    Good luck! xx:wink:
  • FrankiesSaysRelax
    FrankiesSaysRelax Posts: 403 Member
    First off, take a deep breath and relax. Your BMR is about 1400 calories so you need to be eating at least that just so your body can function properly. Next, you don't gain over a day. You need to pick a calorie goal and stick with it for at least 2 to 3 weeks then reassess whether it's working. Weighing daily and deciding if you're gaining or losing doesn't work. There are too many variables at play.

    I'd suggest reading up on BMR, TDEE and filling in your info in MFP, setting a loss rate (I'd suggest no more than 1 pound per week) and sticking to it. Log your food religiously by weighing and measuring everything. Give it 3 weeks and then see if you need to tweak the amount.

    ^^ This is great advice. You need to give each calorie amount at least a few weeks to see if you're gaining or not. I can eat 1200 calories, but if I eat a high sodium meal I will see a gain in weight the next day. It doesn't mean I gained anything, I'm just holding on to water weight. Keep this in mind before freaking out about the scale. The things we eat can have a short-term effect on our weight.

    Definitely look into TDEE and try eating 10 or 20 percent less than that. Try it out for a few weeks and then weigh yourself.
  • megsmom2
    megsmom2 Posts: 2,362 Member
    Stop weighing yourself so often!!! You are making yourself nuts with mostly normal fluctuations. Stick to a reasonable calorie level, be consistant and PATIENT. You're on a bad habit cycle...break it! You may gain a bit at first as thins normalize...that's ok...you're going for the long haul, right? Relax, step away from the scale, eat sensibly and log it. You can do this!
  • liquidmelancholy
    liquidmelancholy Posts: 2
    Thanks for all the replies, there's some great advice there :)

    I'm going to try 1500 calories a day for 2 weeks, like has been suggested, and then weigh myself after that point.

    According to most calculations 1500 should be about right for me. But should I eat this much on exercise days? I don't do a heavy work-out at all. But I calculated that 30 mins of yogalates and 5 mins on the exercise bike burns 150-200 calories. Should I eat back those calories too?

    I just would have thought my body and metabolism would have sorted itself out by now though? I've not eaten under 1200 calories since January this year at least! And have been doing the exercise 4 times a week.

    Most people say they gain a bit (i.e. up to half a stone) but that stops after a few weeks. I've gained like 10 pounds so far, and have been doing my healthier regime for nearly the last year! The fact I'm still not sorted out after all this time is the main worry I have that I'll never get back to a "normal" state, and I'll just keep gaining with no end in sight!

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