Hello! I'm so lonely......

Craznge
Craznge Posts: 13
edited November 2023 in Getting Started
I joined my fitness pal (app) for the experience and also for support but I don't have any friends using it and I really don't have any body supporting me to get fit because they all think I'm super healthy and well. 'A sign of good living' they call it! I just need motivation. It's very hard trying to be healthy for myself without resources or support. I'm under a lot of stress right now and I'm eating like I've being starving all my life.

I was 164lbs but I lost 6lbs over 2months! (Ridiculous but it's progress ) I have a special event in my life coming up in 8months that I want to have lost 28lbs for because it includes a very special dress that used to fit me (I didn't have money to get then and someone got it for me now). I know it sounds like I have a lot of time but it's really not much considering the extremely slow rate of my progress.

I gained 50lbs in 2years because of change. Lots of change! I just need motivation because I'm running out ....fast! I even stopped exercising and eating right (by eating right I mean half a cupcake, one twix instead of two)! I wanna start now when my metabolism is high and I have time for myself and I'm not too discouraged not when I'm extRemely overweight because I know myself and by then I wouldn't even care anymore. Sigh.......

Replies

  • Mechanikitty
    Mechanikitty Posts: 90 Member
    You just have to put yourself out there, reply on forums, log daily, comment and encourage people when you do get friends and suddenly MFP is your best friend. My best success began when I started posting on the forums and now I have some friends who are really fun and helpful. It makes logging even more rewarding to have people say 'good job'. I think it's almost as good as losing the weight itself.

    Everyone is on the same boat here. Even though you might have nothing in common with someone you still have that goal of losing weight and it makes a really strong community of determined, like-minded people. Don't be afraid to send a friend request! Don't be shy!
  • health1971
    health1971 Posts: 136
    Hi, just want to tell u that u r not alone any more... MFP is a big family and we r all here to help each other out... Please feel free to add me ;-)...
  • funnygirlt
    funnygirlt Posts: 23 Member
    Please add me to your friend list--I have the same amount to lose, and have gained a lot also due to life changes, and some unfortunate health news. I blame the meds for the weight gain (ha), but it was probably more emotional stress eating. Bread and butter, cupcakes with frosting, twix bars...you name it and I seem to be gravitating it more and more. Today is the day that I am starting to reach out again, and start over--this time it will work :)
  • Dandman1990
    Dandman1990 Posts: 196 Member
    Hmm from what I've seen some people around your weight have been managing to lose about 1.5lbs per week which would get you to your goal with time to spare.

    Things like cutting out chocolate (not totally just limiting yourself pretty strictly) and lowering the carbs in your diet if you eat lots of bread and potatoes etc would probably help. Of course you're also going to have to go through the blood, sweat and tears that comes with doing cardio exercises (aka hell on Earth) too such as running or cycling etc. Swimming would be a really, really useful thing to do too unless you're like me and too ashamed to go anywhere near swimwear in public. xD
  • Via_14
    Via_14 Posts: 992 Member
    Hi there =)

    Don't worry you will find lots of supportive people on MFP. I've been trying to lose weight for 9 years now, affected by a lot of change and hell, so I can relate when it comes to having trouble with motivation. Just take it one day at a time and remember it gets easier with time - be kind to yourself because any weight loss is good =)

    You're very right in that the earlier you take control of your weight the better for your health but remember it's never too late and there are ample examples of extremely overweight people losing weight at older ages. And even if you add a few pounds try not to get discouraged. As long you are doing the weight loss for yourself you are going to do great!

    All the best!!

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  • Craznge
    Craznge Posts: 13
    Omg me too! Butter is my frenemy and I have tried do many times over and over and I just ended up gaining more! Finally someone similar :)
  • klerato
    klerato Posts: 45
    Sending an add
  • Craznge
    Craznge Posts: 13
    I really don't like exercising outside, it's makes me feel self conscious....a lot! I know no one is looking at me but I can't help to feel like I'm the center of attention...I don't know why.
  • BrittanyHarrington1015
    BrittanyHarrington1015 Posts: 25
    Feel free to add me! I just joined a few days ago :)
  • teamAmelia
    teamAmelia Posts: 1,247 Member
    You have a lot of things going for you that will make your weight loss successful.

    1-You WANT to do it!
    2-You know why you want to do it right now as opposed to waiting later. I think it's important for people to know what motivates them or causes them to lose focus.
    3-You have MFP. As other ppl have stated, MFP is very supportive and won't let you quit...unless you want to. We can only do so much.
    4-You also have time on your side. Twenty-eight pounds in eight months is very doable! Good luck! :smile:
  • teamAmelia
    teamAmelia Posts: 1,247 Member
    I really don't like exercising outside, it's makes me feel self conscious....a lot! I know no one is looking at me but I can't help to feel like I'm the center of attention...I don't know why.

    Do you think that they're judging you bc you're overweight? http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/956718-hey-fat-girl

    In response to you and the other person loving butter, OMG, I'm so sorry that you're addicted to butter. My family used to let us eat pieces of butter when we were kids. WTH? But, as an adult, I literally think of my heart when I see butter. The only time I use it is when I'm eating a baked potato, which is rare, and I hardly ever use it on the potato. Anyway, maybe you should try substituting the butter with other things, like jelly or fresh fruit, or just with some lean meat.
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    6lbs is not bad! At least it's something, which is a good sign. Sometimes we are our own biggest fans, but I understand the loneliness. I am a full time single mama with no family around me. I have loads of friends who are doing what they can to get fit, but my schedule with the kids don't always fit what they can do. Some get together and walk after work, but I have to pick up the kids. Some go to the gym early in the morning, but child watch isn't open yet. I have a friend who goes with me, but we don't always get to go together. It takes a ton of self motivation, but every small victory is a big one! If you can look yourself in the mirror at the end of the day and say that you avoided some kind of bad food, or that you did a good work out, or anything that may seem small, it's all a victory! Keep it up.
  • DianneP6772
    DianneP6772 Posts: 272 Member
    Ok - i started in May 2013 at about the same weight as you are now. I am 5 4 3/4" and started at 159.4. I hadn't weighed myself in ages and was shocked when i saw that. I heard about MFP and looked at it and thought - i will try this. Before i had always tried to lose a few by just cutting back some - but then those lbs would quickly return. Of course i didn't weigh myself because that would validate it!

    You have time to lose the weight you want to lose if you are truly serious and diligent. I put my goal at 129 - which Really - i didn't think was anywhere near possible. But they have tickers and goals - so i thought - put it down. Day one i entered what i normally had for breakfast. I thought - this is very healthy - a big bowl of a mixture of oatmeal, granola, protein powder, dried cranberries, milk. I ate it and then got on MFP to enter it. It came up to 600+ calories! I was floored! That was half of my days allotment! Okay that had to change. Also i had always had a biscotti with coffee before the cereal. Biscotti was 160, not to mention the half and half i poured in the coffee. Ok - next day - just cooked oatmeal with protein powder (and now blueberries) - around 225 calories. And half a biscotti - now no biscotti - there are other things later in the day i would rather have.

    I got back into cycling. Started with about 8 miles, now usually doing 22-30 about 5-6 days a week. Also do tons of yardwork. Yard looks better - i burn calories - a win- win. I love racking up the exercise calories. There are certain treats i have everyday like a blueberry, grape, protein powder, banana smoothie and Zone bars - which taste like candy!

    I am not there yet - but i am getting there and almost where you want to be. Its been 4 1/2 months. You have much longer - you can do it. There are so many people on here that have lost way more than i have - so its totally possible.

    Good luck ~ start today. You have to want it - only you can do it. And you can.........
  • Warchortle
    Warchortle Posts: 2,197 Member
    h607821DA Don't worry, that's what the internet is for.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    "If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company." - Jean-Paul Sartre
  • IAMWORTHIT14
    IAMWORTHIT14 Posts: 6
    You have definitely taken the right first step by joining MFP and reaching out for support. With support and hard work, you will blow those 28 lbs away! Please feel free to add me. I have a lot more to lose, but I do have an upcoming special event which is helping keep me motivated. Good luck and keep reaching out!
  • Craznge
    Craznge Posts: 13
    Oh no. I don't think they are judging me I just feel like I'm walking wrong or my postion well lifting is all wrong and I just feel very self conscious and that lead to me losing focus. I don't know how to explain it.
  • Miffylou
    Miffylou Posts: 307 Member
    Have sent through a friend request.

    Logging onto MFP is now a daily habit for me and I feel a good one. It allows me to say what I need without the feeling that I am going to be judged by my friends. I enjoy reading peoples different opinions about different topics and most of all I have learnt an amazing amount of knowledge about being healthy and living healthy.

    You will get back what you put in and more. If you have the mental attitude the rest will follow. :smile:
  • zenJes
    zenJes Posts: 198 Member
    hey, if you are worried about your lifting form, get one personal training session and see if they can give you some pointers!! Best way to learn is to ask the experts!!! I love getting my form tweaked!!
    I train pretty much everyday love weights!! and crossfit :D Ive been on mfp for awhile now and its all gone a bit quiet so feel free to add me, always stoked to meet people and have a yarn!! :D
  • Miffylou
    Miffylou Posts: 307 Member
    Oh no. I don't think they are judging me I just feel like I'm walking wrong or my postion well lifting is all wrong and I just feel very self conscious and that lead to me losing focus. I don't know how to explain it.

    The biggest think that changed for me about 18month ago was when I realised that I need to do this for me. And no matter what anyone else says or thinks it does't matter.

    It's my life and I'm the one living it and for that I now live it and enjoy it. There are no time limits being healthy is a life long commitment.
  • the_summer_belle
    the_summer_belle Posts: 353 Member
    You need to update your profile most people wont add anyone unless they have at least 1-2 real picture of themselves and something in their profile to say who they are. This is because there are many creepers on here pretending to be women sometimes but its really a perverted old man. Prove you are who you say you are and you'll get more friends on here.
  • teamAmelia
    teamAmelia Posts: 1,247 Member
    You need to update your profile most people wont add anyone unless they have at least 1-2 real picture of themselves and something in their profile to say who they are. This is because there are many creepers on here pretending to be women sometimes but its really a perverted old man. Prove you are who you say you are and you'll get more friends on here.

    Have to disagree. I understand someone not wanting to put their pic online (becauuuuse of creepers). I don't see the point of leaning towards adding someone just bc they have *A* pic up. It could be a stolen pic. Creepers don't do that, do they? Those ppl will make unwanted advances whether they have a pic up or not, and once they do, just delete and block them. The OP just needs to be active, period. Not only active, but request ppl and if they want to accept, they will, and they respond to your updates and interact w you once they get to know you.
    hey, if you are worried about your lifting form, get one personal training session and see if they can give you some pointers!! Best way to learn is to ask the experts!!! I love getting my form tweaked!!
    I train pretty much everyday love weights!! and crossfit :D Ive been on mfp for awhile now and its all gone a bit quiet so feel free to add me, always stoked to meet people and have a yarn!! :D
    Agreed. Get a trainer and get him/her to show you how to do the workouts that you want to do. I'm assuming that you paid for a gym membership, so see if someone there can assist you.
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