HELP ! i have so many questions !

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so i think I've come to the conclusion that i'm simply not losing the amount of weight i want to lose per week due to what i am eating. I've also came to the conclusion that i don't want to call what i'm eating a " diet " because that just makes me more tempted to want a burger and fries but hey that's just me .

anyway, is it better to have a big breakfast , a small lunch, and a big dinner ? or a small breakfast, small lunch, and a big dinner ? or a big breakfast, a small lunch and a small dinner ?

is it really healthy and beneficial to eat 3-5 small meals a day including snacks?

currently i am having a small breakfast , a morning snack, a small lunch, a after lunch snack, a medium-big dinner and maybe dessert but it is rare. i also drink alcohol .... mostly beer which i already know is a big reason for weigh gain (hence me hating the fact that i pretty much have a double chin) but i cant seem to cut it out completely :/

my goal is simply to lose 40+ lbs in the next 3-4 months which I've heard and seen that it can be done but as of right now i am struggling and i don't want to give up .... this is truly something i need. my ideal weight is supposed to be in between 90-110 lbs which in my case means i'm severely obese for my age and height, (a bit discouraging) but i hope someone sees this post and can give me some feedback/opinions .

Sincerely ,

a big girl .

Replies

  • KateGifford
    KateGifford Posts: 2,395 Member
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    It's beneficial to have 3-5 small meals a day solely because it will keep you feeling less hungry. It doesn't help your metabolism any. As for which meal to have as your big meal, that's all based on trial and error, and what works for you. Personally, I have something small for breakfast (if anything at all, a medium portioned lunch, and a big dinner.
  • Swiftdogs
    Swiftdogs Posts: 328 Member
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    Your mix of meals is something you'll have to experiment with. I'm a real oddball - I have to have breakfast, then my primary meal at lunch. I usually have morning and afternoon snacks, then little or nothing for dinner. That's my best pattern even if I'm not doing that "D" word thing :).

    If you want a beer (or more), just fit it into your calories while making sure you also get enough protein and fat. I found I was able to substitute a very lightly mixed (1/4 oz. to 8 ozs.) bourbon and sparking water when I want fiz with my alcohol, which is much lower calories. Otherwise my preference is a dry white wine.

    Experiment, see what works, then try something else. Good luck!
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
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    It makes no difference when you eat or what you eat for weight loss. How much you eat and how many calories that is makes a huge difference. You said you aren't losing as much as you want. You'll need to get used to that. We can't decide how much weight will come off, where it will come off or how long it will take to come off. The last few pounds can takes months of hard work to lose so it's best to get that mindset now and don't be discouraged that it isn't all happening on your timeline.
  • medic2038
    medic2038 Posts: 434 Member
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    Unfortunately 10+lbs per month is unrealistic for most people. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it depends on a lot of things (IE a 400lb man certainly could lose 10lbs per month sustainably, a 160lb woman probably can't).
    We all want to see fast results, but in truth it took most of us YEARS to get into the bad shape we are (or were) in, and it's not going to be fixed quickly. Progress IS progress, regardless of the pace.
  • Greenrun99
    Greenrun99 Posts: 2,065 Member
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    so i think I've come to the conclusion that i'm simply not losing the amount of weight i want to lose per week due to what i am eating
    ...

    my goal is simply to lose 40+ lbs in the next 3-4 months which I've heard and seen that it can be done but as of right now i am struggling and i don't want to give up ..

    With goals like that failure is almost certain.. you need realistic goals.. like 10-20 lbs in 3-4 months.. what are you losing now 1 lb a week? That is where you should be aiming.
  • notdieting
    notdieting Posts: 116 Member
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    Unfortunately, as the poster above said, you are unlikely to lose that much weight in the given time frame....you simply aren't big enough to start with. People who do lose that kind of weight that quickly are likely to be in the minimum 200s as a start weight. I consider I have done well losing 42lb in five months with a start weight of 227lb, which averages about 2 pound per week but in reality, was a big loss initially and now about 1lb per week.

    At your size, expect, if you are really dedicated and stick to your calorie allowance and work out regularly, to lose that steady 1lb per week, giving a more likely timeframe of nine to ten months, maybe a bit less if you have an initial big drop x
  • cudders121
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    thank you everyone , i really appreciate this . all of your opinions make a lot of sense.
    i currently weigh 183.6 lbs ... i know. i know i made myself sound super huge lol but that is just how i feel honestly ... this is the most I've ever weighed in my entire life which i guess is putting me in a mindset of " i have to lose weight and i have to lose this weight quickly like right now "

    i am turning 23 in January and that's why i set my goal at 40+ lbs putting me back to a slim 135 that i was 2 years ago .
    i guess i just need to understand that it is going to take awhile and that the support and motivation from you good people here on MFP who have came so far and worked so hard to get where you are today can help me.

    i think i'm going to stick with what I've been doing .. a small breakfast a small lunch and a big dinner ... it helps my hunger especially with the snacks in between . i eat a lot of things that are high in protein and low in fat . i workout i'd say everyday with me working in a restaurant as a server, walking to work, and doing circuit training (30 Day shred) 3-4 days from since last week and i'm also trying to pick up jogging with my friends.

    anyway that was just a little insight on myself and my set up/plan .. i hope you guys can continue to give me feedback and support.

    thanks again .
  • Reese104
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    if a sweet tooth is too much, try a dark chocolate kiss. It is so satisfying and doesnt make you feel like you need to finish the bag. Im not even a fan of dark chocolate and it does the trick. I try and do this on those PMS days where everything looks delicious. If you choose to have a kiss, have it right after your meal so everything is processed in your body at the same time rather than starting it up again an hour later.

    Hope this is useful.

    =)
  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
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    Also be aware that you losing 1 lb weekly because you set things up correctly is much more sustainable than you are only losing 1 lb weekly because you set things up badly, which usually won't last.

    Did you change your MFP diet goal to 1 lb weekly loss?
    Are you truly with a 40 hr sedentary desk job with little movement and long commute, and mostly sitting outside the exercise you do?
    Or are you actually Lightly Active that many find out they are?
    Actually, as a server, that's Active for non-exercise activity level. Be honest, it'll benefit you in the long run, many find the short run too.

    Because under-eating for your level of activity can force you into just 1 lb weekly loss, and sooner or later usually less.

    But you eating correctly can keep that 1 lb sustainable, even if it's not linear week to week loss, it still ends up being faster.

    You eating back at least 80% of the exercise calories you log?
    That way you can keep the loss at just the 1lb weekly, no more that is unrealistic for the amount to lose.

    Do you weigh all your food that goes into your mouth, except liquids, even pre-packaged items?
    Eating really 1.25 to 1.45 servings many times a day when you think it's only 1 serving can remove the deficit.
  • thefathippy
    thefathippy Posts: 3 Member
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    Nini! I know exactly what you're going through. I had a goal weight for December that looks like I'm not going to reach because it seems like I've hit a plateau :/ so I started switching up my gym exercises this week and went back to drinking 2 cups of green tea a day. hopefully that works but ultimately I think I've gotten to caught up on scale numbers. Like everytime I'm in the gym I'm tempted to weigh myself. And if it's not what I want I get upset like "what am I doing wrong?" but I should've just kept weighting myself once a week instead of 3 days a week because your weight fluctuates throughout the day. Anyway, this isn't called a weight loss JOURNEY for nothing. there will be days you don't want to work out or days you wanna eat a hamburger that doesn't mean that your journey is ruined. tomorrow is a new day and you learn from your choices. just remember whatever you put into your body this month is making your body for next month (or something like that lol) GOOD LUCK THO! I love you :)) :heart: