Scary decision, need some encouragement

You.are.awesome!!!!

I've been overweight my ENTIRE life. Those that have been here know that your life ultimately revolves around the scale. Your self esteem is in direct proportion with the direction the number goes. I have worked hard, mentally and physically to conquer the demons that made me reach 323lbs. I've lost 143lbs and could probably lose another 20. I have been battling with myself the last 6 months to get those 20 off but I can seem to do it. I feel like I'm fighting my body the whole time. After a new bench PR of 230lbs on Thursday I started thinking. I LOVE being strong! My body is made for strength and building muscle. So I have decided to take a leap of faith and throw the scale out the window (or give it to my trainer at least) and focus purely on building those two. I am terrified of gaining weight since I've spent my whole life focused on losing it. I've been reassured by my trainer that if we do this the right way I won't gain too much and I'll get leaner...plus the best part, I'll get stronger! So I'd love some stories of success in this area with pictures of course and just for comparison sake, I currently weight 180, am 5'6" and have 26% body fat.

I don't have anywhere near as much muscle as you but I'm mentally in the exact same space. I haven't weighed myself in months and I actually gave mine away a couple months ago. I also went through a period last year where I totally stopped weighing or logging or anything - just kept working out and ate what I wanted.

If I remember I'll wrassle you up a picture later.

(Um, for the sake of honesty - I *have* gained a little weight but I also went a little bit nuts with it - and I have some medical type issues that contribute to that - because it'd been so long. It wasn't a lot of weight - about 6 lbs over the course of the year. If you think about it - its not too tough to lose 6 lbs. And the mental exhaustion - and physical exhaustion - wasn't worth it anymore for me. I *might* go back to try and drop a little - and I'll buy a scale then - but I honestly don't regret it at all. I feel GOOD instead of tired from dieting.)


ETA: when I say "working out" i mean "lifting 4x a week and lying on the sofa watching back episodes of glee while shoving chocolate in my mouth the other 3x a week" -- so I mean if I'd actually kept to my normal schedule which includes some short runs - 30 minutesish - or similar cardio I'd probably not have gained so much. It'd just been so long that I went a little nuts. I imagine you will also get a bit of rebound weight - you've lost alot more and for a long longer than I had. Don't fret it - you can drop it again and my current state of mental health and body acceptance are MUCH better than they was before I gained the weight. So, worth it.

In for Bench video.

^thisthisthis