18 and BACK at my highest weight ~

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Hotinadvance
Hotinadvance Posts: 18
in Introduce Yourself
Hello all,

This isn't the sort of thing I'm usually keen on doing. I don't even have a facebook at this point given my discomfort with my weight, so posting here feels crazy for me! When I was 15 I weighed 260 pounds, and took a year off from high school (taking classes online during that time) to lose 80 pounds (leaving me at 180). I felt amazing. I had been overweight my whole life, and I could finally shop at "normal" stores given that they carried a size XL. I had my first boyfriend and all that teenage jazz. I maintained for two years, before starting on birth control (the devil!) partially for my own teenage whims and partially to control migraines. I got the depo shot, which people might be familiar with, and immediately gained 30 pounds in a month. The shot stays in your body for 3-4 months, and everything of course went downhill from there in terms of weight gain. Almost a year after the shot I am sitting here at 250. In fairness, the last 20 pounds I tacked on in only a month due to slight nudging from my doctor and the internet in order to make the BMI requirement for surgery that I had worked so hard to avoid some three years earlier. I have now been given approval, and am waiting to hear from my insurance (tufts) whether or not I will be required to complete a 6 month program prior to surgery or if my years of recorded programs (get in shape for women, weight watchers, fat camps) will let me bypass it on recommendation from my doctor. That being said, during those 6 months I will be forced to maintain a weight of 248 or above in order to still meet requirements.

To me, this is insane. I feel as if I am almost being forced to be unhealthy in order to achieve greater results in the long-term. Regardless, upon being approved I still feel as if this is the start of my /second/ journey and would love to hear input from anyone who has been through a similar thing with insurance.

Thanks!
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Replies

  • Sobeone
    Sobeone Posts: 72
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    I don't get it. Why would you have surgery if you could lose it on your own. From what I read the surgery is no picinic. Losing weight seems to be real easy to me. Just eat less calories than you take in. So simple. I know theres all these mental things going on too. They say there is no quick way but I say there is. 10 lbs a month is super fast if you ask me just by eating 1000 calories less daily plus if you exercise you could but don't have to eat back those exercise calories. If I can do it you can do it. Disclaimer, I am no expert just giving out friendly advise
  • Hotinadvance
    Hotinadvance Posts: 18
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    I had considered trying to lose weight again without surgery. I am mostly concerned that I will never be able to breach my 180 plateau that way. On top of that, losing a significant amount of weight for a second time seems to me like it will be even more difficult than it was the first time, especially given that (which I should have mentioned) following losing weight for the first time I underwent very serious knee surgery on both legs to prevent constant dislocation due to a genetic soft tissue this order. Upon gaining the weight back, my knees have been giving me so much trouble that even walking can be relatively painful. I have the same issue in all of my joints, and it is aggravated by my increased weight. At 250, I have been advised against much exercising until I have lost a considerable amount of weight. It is very difficult to lose weight by JUST eating less. I've thought it through, and surgery seems to be my best option for long term results and the surgeons I have met with agree (I did get a second opinion.)
  • nwiedeman
    nwiedeman Posts: 2
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    That depo shot really is horrible! It had the same affect on me . After I had realized that the shot was causing the weight gain I went off of it and have never regretted that choice.

    They surgery you are talking about though isn't good. Both my sister and my mom have gotten the surgery and they have changed completely, their personalities are even different now. My sister went from being the nicest girl around to someone I don't care to talk to anymore . Both of them are always feeling sick it has been over a year for my mom and over 2 years for my sister since their surgeries. My mother has lost a ton of weight she looks anorexic (she has major mental issues) and my sister lost a lot but then gained it right back and stretched out her "pouch" again.

    I wouldn't get the surgery if I were you I wouldn't. I've seen what it has does to those two and I would rather work my *kitten* off then take the easy way out. I feel that the people that have worked hard and take them of themselves to lose weight respect it more and are more likely to keep it off because they know they have earned it. But then the people that get the surgery don't because they didn't have to do anything to get the surgery but eat and not take of yourself.

    I know you are young yet but what if something happens during these 6 monthes of waiting? What if your heart finally says
    "I've had enough!" Girl I have been there I am 40 lbs away from my goal. I was a size 24-26 at one time I know what you are thinking and what is going through your mind but I'm telling you PLEASE rethink the surgery and think about retraining yourself and lose the weight by yourself.

    MFP seems to a big board with a large amount of caring and supportive people . And I am positive that not a single person here would mind helping you out along the way. If you fall you brush yourself off and get going again. It is hard it is very hard but just keeping thinking when your lungs and body feel like they're on fire that you want this, you need this.

    Take care of yourself!
  • lewcompton
    lewcompton Posts: 881 Member
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    I'm Lew and this is my fifth attempt at weight loss... went from 240 to 180... from 360 to 300... 375 to 275... 380 to 310... The problem was those were all plans and plans end. I now simply track what I eat, drink and exercise here and stay under my calorie goal... I was 425 pounds 15 months ago... Now I am at 235.9 pounds. You can lose weight if you want to and the only limit is what you place on yourself... Anyone is welcome to add me. I comment all the time and my diary is open for friends to glean ideas from.
  • This43IsNotMe
    This43IsNotMe Posts: 17 Member
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    Birth control will screw with you. You have seen it happen. You were able to make an amazing weight loss on your own, showed that doing something un natural to your body made you gain...so why are you wanting to do something unnatural again! You need to wrap your head around your goals and what you want. Keeping yourself at a high weight is unhealty and you just seem so young to be considering surgery and staying at that weight for 6 months. Do it the right way, it's harder and takes longer but in the end will be worth it! i'm with Lew, i am fianlly just eating right and exercising to make life a healtny choice....it feels amazing. Do i want my size 10 jeans to fit tomorrow....yes, but i know it will be a while. I just got on here last week and the support is amazing. Look to those who have the same goals and can be there with you, hold you accountable and support, support, support you through it all in a natural healty way!
  • khearron26
    khearron26 Posts: 171 Member
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    Reading your story really hurt my heart. Because I understand the mental anguish that being overweight can cause. I understand the fear of never getting to where you've been before again, and never getting to that goal that seems so unobtainable. I want you to know that it is possible. It sounds like your biggest fear is the level of difficulty your weight loss will put you through, and the overwhelming feeling of how long it will take you to get there. You have to take this one day at a time. And keep suppressing those feelings that you're not good enough, that the journey is too long and too difficult for you. It is so much easier to make it one day at a time. And when you go on your journey that way, then further down the road, when you look back, you will see how far you have come without even realizing it. The surgery is incredibly expensive, involves a lot of recovery time, and puts you at risk of complications, infections, etc. You have so many resources. You can do it WITHOUT the surgery. And as for your bad knees, I understand that too. My father in law has had to have both of his replaced. Although there are many exercises that might be too high impact for your knees to handle, there are many options for you! Swimming and water aerobics is an excellent tool for you! It is soft and easy on the knees. Very low impact. Also, a lot of weight training can be done sitting down. And as you lose the weight, you will find it easier and easier to do things that are higher impact. Take your journey one day at a time! Track your eating habits to the fullest extent. Try your best to stay as close to your goal numbers as you can. And I PROMISE you can make it! There are so many people here that are on the same journey, in the same boat. We can be your support system! Come to us, come to me, and we can get through our journeys together!
  • WaterBunnie
    WaterBunnie Posts: 1,370 Member
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    It's too easy to blame birth control for weight gain and although hormonal changes do effect our weight - to put on 30lbs in just one month you must have been eating WAY in excess of what you needed to be eating, it couldn't have been that high on a sensible diet so it's not fair to blame the depo for everything.

    You've lost it the right way before and with the required effort you can do it again. Swimming is kinder to your knees than walking. It'll take dedication but if you really want it you'll find that strength in yourself and being so young your metabolism will be higher than us older ones!

    Please do reconsider having surgery. It may seem the answer but getting there under your own steam will be safer and give you such a great sense of achievement. Be no longer the victim, be the champion!
  • Sobeone
    Sobeone Posts: 72
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    Please don't anyone take this the wrong way but I hear so many excuses. Someone called me fat so that upset me so I ate and that made me fat, no, eating to much made you fat. If you cant walk use a wheelchair, do what ever you have to do. Enough of excuses, if you are tired of being fat do something about it. No one is going to loose the weight for you. Thinking surgery is an easy way out is wrong. Doctors encourage surgery because they make money off it. If you did it once it should be easier the second time because you know you can do it. No Excuses, tell yourself. Get mad and do it. Trust me, I say this because I care.
  • chauncyrenayCHANGED
    chauncyrenayCHANGED Posts: 788 Member
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    Ok, Sobeone. This is something you learn through life experience. Not at 18 years old. Let's ease up a lil' bit. :flowerforyou:
  • Sobeone
    Sobeone Posts: 72
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    That's the problem everyone eases up. What did I say was wrong, give me an f'n break
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
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    Considering most people who have weight loss surgery end up gaining the weight back, and being in even worse health afterward, avoid it. You don't want to go down that road, it's completely unnecessary and a waste of both time and money.

    Don't throw your life away.
  • elyelyse
    elyelyse Posts: 1,454 Member
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    the last 20 pounds I tacked on in only a month due to slight nudging from my doctor and the internet in order to make the BMI requirement for surgery

    maybe this is the norm? but that sounds like the most *kitten* backwards strategy ever. If I was told to put on 20 pounds in order to qualify for surgery to help me lose weight, i think my head would explode. Then I would go get a second opinion.

    re: birth control...the hormones may make you hold on to a few pounds of water weight, and they may increase your appetite, but they do not just put the fat pounds on you, that comes from too much food. yes, the pills may make it harder for you, but they don't pack the pounds on by themselves.

    you are young. you can do this without surgery. this surgery will change your body, not for the better, for your whole life. count calories, eat at a deficit. that's all you really need to lose weight. (physically)

    im not a big fan of weight loss surgery because of the risks and the fact that you have to make seriously drastic lifestyle changes anyway, even more extreme food restriction than "plain" dieting. When older folks who have tried for 20, 30, 40 years to lose weight decide to have surgery as a last resort, i can almost accept that...but someone as young as you? I have a hard time with that. Learn how to eat right...you will need those skills for the rest of your life. Start now.
  • curlygirl_67
    curlygirl_67 Posts: 1 Member
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    If your mind isnt set, then the surgery wont do any good....It's a quick weight loss physically, but it doesnt fix your lifestyle habits....
  • mikenelson20
    mikenelson20 Posts: 44 Member
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    Either s**t or get off the pot. Excuses are for people that have time and energy to put off their dreams. Surgery is for extremely obese people. Far to many people get surgeries done that do not need it. If you want lose weight then lose it. Otherwise stop *****ing about being over weight and accept the fact that you will always be over weight until you and yourself do something about it. 18 is plenty old enough to realize that you don't want to be over weight anymore. There plenty of 18 years that have done more with there life than I will ever do. Why, because they don't let excuses dictate their life. I don't want to come as mean or uncaring but when I finally stopped looking at all the problems that prevent my goal of losing weight and started looking for solutions, I started to get somewhere. Not finished yet, but I will be there, well before most.

    Remember you don't need to exercise to loose weight. Exercise should be looked at as a healthy lifestyle habit, not a weight loss technique (why would fit people ever workout if there are not fat). Eat properly, track your calories. Then as the weight comes off, slowly introduce exercise and reap the benefits. You done it before, you already how tough it is. You can see the battle that lies ahead. Now are you going to sacrifice today, so you don't have to regret tomorrow? You can, and I know you can.
  • janicelo1971
    janicelo1971 Posts: 823 Member
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    I was on depo for 6 years and the pill before that....never gained more then a few water weight pounds..easy to blame something...also easy to get off something and get on what feels right and move on...

    how is this a journey or helping...seems u want to get fatter and fatter to get a surgery????
  • Hotinadvance
    Hotinadvance Posts: 18
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    Well this has unfortunately been overwhelmingly negative.

    I understand that people can feel very strongly about bariatric surgery, but I see absolutely no reason to blatantly be a **** about it to someone who is considering that as an option (ahem, Mikenelson.)

    To clarify a few things -

    1. I HAVE made up my mind about surgery. That is my decision.

    2. I do not see it as an easy way out. As someone who compulsively overeats, I see it as a tool to set a physical limitation on top of healthy choices and exercise. I have a problem with quantity and not quality (I actually eat very healthy food! Just in large portions! (sans icecream, I'll admit, I do ****ing love my icecream.) I'm going to have to make a lot of very severe changes, and I expect it to be a struggle as I adjust to a very limited lifestyle in regard to eating. I know it will take work.

    3. Anyone who has told you that just eating less is an ideal form of weight loss has lied to you, in my opinion. I don't just want to lose weight - I want to be fit, and have a body that reflects that. Exercising DURING weight loss is key to preventing extra skin that will require future surgery, at least if aesthetics are important to you. The quicker I loose a portion of weight, the faster I can begin exercising again which I miss dearly.

    4. My turning to surgery does not belittle your natural weight loss. **** yeah! You did it! I did it too, and I wasn't able to maintain it. I believe that this will work for me. Just because surgery is not the right path for you, does not mean it is not the right path for me.

    5. Thank you so much elyelyse for at least being respectful.

    6. I have attempted countless programs (not fad diets, which admittedly I also tried) since I was 13, including but not limited to various fat camps, weight watchers, wellspring academy, get in shape for women, overeaters anon, etc.

    7. I tried losing weight without a "program."

    8. The depo shot is not an excuse. It is notorious for causing weight gain, both due to hormones and cravings. Obviously I fell for the cravings, or else I wouldn't have gained 30 pounds. However it did kickstart my weight gain. After that I fell into old habits. I stopped taking it, of course.

    9. I am not currently continuing to gain weight! I gained 5-10 pounds to meet a bmi requirement, and es, while that does sound insane, I believe that the benefit of having the surgery will outweigh the ridiculous **** you have to go through in order to meet your insurance plans crazy requirements.
  • Sobeone
    Sobeone Posts: 72
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    Didn't you ask for input?
  • Hotinadvance
    Hotinadvance Posts: 18
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    That actually sounded really defensive >>

    I guess my whole point was, to soften it, I welcome your opinion but please do be /nicer/ about it, yeah?

    Maybe consider the fact that I have done years of research? That I have worked at it?

    And perhaps you're still very against surgery. And that's okay. My mom is too, but even she believes that this is a good decision on my part. Feel free to let me know.

    But don't be that guy. Or at least another "that guy." Because I've already heard from like 10 "that guy"s so far.
  • Hotinadvance
    Hotinadvance Posts: 18
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    I'm not complaining about your message, I'm just not digging the delivery :P

    Can you blame me?
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
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    A large percentage of weight loss surgery patients end up even larger than they were pre-surgery. Or dead. The success stories are not that common, compared to the horror stories. Malnutrition, multiple surgeries, serious illnesses, you will never have a normal life.

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