Calorie Deficit - Seems to be a hot but confusing topic.

Oh wow. I honestly don't think I've ever felt this much animosity in a forum or been attacked so harshly. I just made my diary public for all to see. I munch a lot, so I cater my diet to include several healthy snacks per day while having three small-medium size meals. Please keep in mind that normally my diet consists of at least two salads per day, but since I began tracking on MFP, I had munchie foods here (the special K bars and such) so that's what I ate (a lot). My vehicle was in the garage and I hadn't been grocery shopping for "real food". That changed tonight, because I got my durango back today.

Now I'll try to address several issues.

"when they say deficit they don't mean your net calories for the day. they mean how much under what your target maintenance calories would be." & "it's best to make lifestyle changes so you don't gain it all back later when you go back to what you were doing before."

Thank you, that's very helpful! I am actually making several lifestyle changes. Cutting out alcohol, getting off my butt, not working as hard, eating small amounts more often... the list goes on.

"How long do you use the gazelle for?"

90 to 120 minutes per day. I usually go for an hour at a time twice a day. I don't do it to try to kill myself, I enjoy it! I start pandora, grab the ear buds, and have some personal time, and I love it! I'm usually drenched in sweat every session!

"Many of us don't have big stomachs - we got fat on sweets, pastry, sweetened drinks etc, not on big quantities of food. When switching to a clean diet you can feel full on 800 calories a day - for a while. It's just an adjustment period, that I personally don't see needing to be "fixed" as long as you know what's going to come next."

Thank you nelinelineli and QuietBloom, that was the most constructive and helpful message I've seen yet. I wasn't aware that switching to cleaner foods would make me feel fuller on fewer calories. Thank you for preparing me for "what's going to come next" I'll make sure to keep an eye on that.

"Are you losing lbs??? With those number I would think it's falling off you." & "I wish you well"

Thank you for the well wishes! I am! I'm averaging a pound every other day right now, but I do know that will slow down. When I first started with the Gazelle, I was gaining muscle but burning fat. I begin each session slowly to warm up, work up to 140 heart rate (aerobic), and then cool down during the last 10 mins. I follow up with a lot of stretching. When I was gaining pounds but losing fat, I could feel a difference in how my clothing felt, and how I felt overall. I knew it was improvement in my overall health. After about 5 pounds gained, I started losing quite quickly.

"How'd you gain 50 lbs? Did the magical weight fairy kiss your forehead and bestow glitter and starshine calories upon you?"

I've addressed this once, but to reiterate: poor diet choices, fast food, lots of beer and doritos, no exercise, lots of candy, and simply not caring about myself or my personal appearance.

"You didn't get to the place where you need to lose weight by under eating." & " What is your plan after you lose the weight?"

You're exactly right, I didn't. I got to this weight by living a sedentary lifestyle, working at the computer, playing video games with my husband and kids, eating potato chips, fast food, and candy whenever I wanted, and drinking beer. Please don't look at this as "she's whining that she can't eat so many calories oh boohoo, attention *kitten*" - my questions and comments were sincere unlike many of the flaming responses I received. My plan for after losing the weight is to continue building muscle until I feel healthy and look toned. I have already promised myself that I will never be this overweight again.

"Do something you can maintain forever. I know it feels perfect right now, but as mentioned by a PP, in a few weeks it'll catch up to you and you'll be feeling not so hot and wondering why you're craving everything under the sun and having uncontrollable binges."

Thank you for this. What I'm doing right now is something I feel that I can maintain forever. If or when that changes, I will adapt.

"http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2013/105/5/7/you_re_new_here____by_fauxsquared-d61waos.png"
Yes, I am. Cute pic!

To all:

I appreciate most of the comments here. I used to be an assistant aerobics instructor (in 1990 when I was in high school), and I was an exotic dancer (stripper) in 1992 after I had my daughter. I had my son in 1997, and within 6 months I was back into a size 7 (about 130 pounds), and working out with tae bo every day. I also ran three miles twice a week and was an avid horseback rider. I'm no stranger to eating healthy and living a healthy lifestyle.

Several years ago I had some family problems and turned to eating for comfort. That's also when I started drinking more. Then in 2001, my world came crashing in around me. My brother, my only sibling, who was seven years younger than me, was killed in a car accident. No matter how many times you hear, "he died instantly" and "he didn't suffer" - those don't make it ok. They don't make you wish it hadn't happened. They don't make you choose to live a healthy lifestyle. They make you take pills to force yourself back to sleep when you wake up because the reality of being awake hurts to your very soul. They make you ignore everything and everyone around you. Including yourself.

Those of you who made rude comments, I thank you as well. The world needs all types I suppose. I did not join MFP for negativity; I've had enough of that in my life. I hope that after reading a little more about me, you understand that I'm not whining for attention or some uneducated little twit looking to starve to death. If you still have the same initial impression of me, feel free to continue your barrage of insults and negative comments. I'm strong enough to handle them. Life does that.