Lose weight while eating with friends?

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I am trying hard to lose weight but my friends are constantly eating good food and they always ask me out. I only want to eat salads nut they love to eat ramen (the authentic japanese kind, not the instant ones that you get in a packet). And I dislike it because everytime I eat noodles or rice, I can literally feel my face being bloated and gross and although I don't finish my food, I feel really guilty and I hate it.

Because of that I don't even want to go out with people anymore because if I were to order only salads, my friends would be like, "are you trying to lose weight? LOL" and stuff like that.

How do you people deal with that?

Also, lately I think I've been losing weight because my clothes and pants feel looser but I feel fat. Like you know this feeling where you just feel gross and disgusted and stuff? Yeah I feel that.

I haven't weighed myself since last year because I used to have an eating disorder and if I find out about my weight, I'll definitely starve myself again and I am trying not to do that.

Replies

  • astronomicals
    astronomicals Posts: 1,537 Member
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    Seek professional advice. Only a person with an ED would say what you've said.
  • rdsalem88
    rdsalem88 Posts: 8 Member
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    If you want to order a salad or order any other type of lite-menu option, just order it and don't look back! Don't let your friends make you feel insecure about the food choices you make. In fact, I find that owning up to it immediately diffuses the situation. If a friend gives you a hard time about it, say something light-hearted like "Yep, you know it.. don't you wish you can resist temptation like me?!" I don't know, something to that effect. If you act embarrassed, then that'll make the situation all the more awkward.

    And if your friends are giving you a genuine hard time about it, then why are you friends with them in the first place? Pull the main offender aside and nip it in the bud if it makes you that uncomfortable.

    Finally, as a former server, ordering a salad or healthy menu choices isn't anything to be ashamed of. Salads are very popular at restaurants & many people of different shapes and sizes order it. I've never judged anyone or made assumptions based off a customer's menu choice, and neither should your friends.
  • katealbright
    katealbright Posts: 135 Member
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    Seek professional advice. Only a person with an ED would say what you've said.

    That is really not helpful. Do not listen to him. Everyone here is self-conscious about they way they look and wants to change the way they eat -- that's why MFP exists.
    I know how you feel about other people drawing attention to your food. I'm vegan and I don't know anyone else who is, so people always make a spectacle of my food. I HATE IT. I cannot remember the last time I went out to eat without someone starting up the vegan conversation.
    Also, people have difficulty taking things seriously while they are still in progress. People are only impressed by the grand finale. When you put yourself out there and try to actively accomplish something, there will always be nay-sayers and critics. These people are just negative -- they can't fail if they never try, right? Don't let them puppet you around. Stand up for yourself. I eat the way I do because it's important to ME and I enjoy it.
    If your clothes are looser then you are losing weight and accomplishing your goals -- good job! :) You are only feeling "fat" because the process of trying to lose weight makes you hyper-aware of your body. Think of it like this: if you are thinking about food all day, you will feel hungry. If you think about the possibility of a meteor crashing into Earth all day, you will feel anxiety. If you go to Disneyland and think about fun Disney characters all day, you will feel happy.
    It's stressful to lose weight. But listen to your body. If you don't like the way you feel when you eat junk food then don't eat it! Believe in yourself and stay positive :)