SAD after success

I was going to post a bunch of super cute bikini pictures...but just go here...the high waist retro glam bathing suites are way more attractive then the butt floss

http://www.modcloth.com/shop/twopiece-swimwear

In fact, those ones are the ones I'm going to wear, when I hit my goal weight cheer up, you're hot!!

In 2011 when I started my original weight loss I was 210 lbs. I'm now at 152 lbs (58 lbs down). What I hated most was my flabby grandma arms. So I started weight training. Mostly lighter weights starting February of this year and then heavy weights this past summer. My flabby arms are almost gone, my legs are toned and my belly is shrinking.

There are some groups on MFP for women doing weight training (Stronglifts 5x5, New Rules for Lifting). It's working to get rid of my flabbyness. Might be worth a try.

Have you seen the cute vintage style bikinis? I have a hot red one. It's high waisted and flattering and would probably work for what you've described, body wise. (I wear it comfortably as a size 10/12 person with most of my weight in my stomach.)

http://www.modcloth.com/shop/twopiece-swimwear/bathing-beauty-two-piece-in-red

sometimes we need those reminders of where we were to not go back there. try to find pride in what u have done! the joy of pregnancy and amazing kiddos way outweighs the flabby tummy issues i have. its hard to remember sometimes but try to concentrate on the positive side. weight training helped me a lot. starting to see some upper abs again! weight training really helps to tighten things up way more than u think it would. try it! i think also when i look amazing in a new dress or outfit or my *kitten* looks great in a pair of jeans it helps me. focus on the body parts that u can highlite and try to forget the rest

I know what you mean! Hang in there and take it one day at a time. Are you lifting weights?? Building muscle?? They say only muscle looks good naked. Perhaps you should make some new goals that include building some muscle/strength and I'm sure your body will be looking HOT I've seen plenty of pictures here of women whose body was really transformed once they starting lifting heavy weights.

I agree, weight training can help. I'm not sure what you are doing exercise-wise already, but consider a yoga or Pilates class too. Those are really great for toning muscle.

And you know what? Maybe for you to be happy with your stuff, you will need to go have some skin removed, don't feel any shame about wanting that. It's perfectly natural to want to look as great as you now feel. You did all this hard work, DAMN SKIPPY you want to show it off. It's natural to want that, you aren't selfish, vain or a freak.

You're a human being who made a massive change in her life and you are proud of what you accomplished and want the world to know it.

So my advice is spend a good chunk of time with some muscle toning and weights, give that about 6 months or so and track your results with a tape measure ( the scale won't help you here, because of building muscle)

If you aren't seeing any results at all in six months, talk to your doctor about getting the skin removed. And REALLY talk to her, discuss options, discuss risks, talk about the cost and whether or not it can be covered in part by any insurance... ask her questions until you are blue in the face, and feel comfortable that you understand everything involved.

You may find an in depth conversation can help you get a grip on your fears about it, and you also may find it's not as horrifyingly expensive as you feared, or that some of it may in fact be covered under your insurance.

Have these discussions with your GP first off and anything she can't help you with ask her if she knows of a surgeon personally that she would recommend that you can at least have an in depth consult with. (Going through your GP first will be less likely to result in a high pressure sales pitch from a McSurgery Clinic sales rep.)

Also as to the cost, consider registering for it. Use gofundme or something like it to ask your family and friends to help you celebrate your accomplishment by chipping in to have the skin removed. (I know this, on the surface, sounds a little on the tacky side, but I see people doing this all the time, so it's apparently a thing you can do now, if you are comfortable doing it)

I don't have the tummy issue, but I have never liked bikinis because I am busty, and also a little modest. I always wear one-piecers because they are just more comfortable and give more coverage.

Am I the only one that isn't into bikinis?

This is going to seem like really strange advice, but here it goes. Take any money that you have planned for surgery and if you can afford it, book a HOT HOLIDAY - I suggest mexico or the carriebean (Jamaica is my fave - hence the profile pic). I like the all inclusive thing to. Then get yourself 3 bikinis and 1 tankini (just in case). The best bottoms are those that go just under your belly button or high hipsters. Boy briefs work too. If you have lost weight in your bosums - halter style tops that tie around you next and back - you can adjust them so the girls are where they need to be - lol. Here's why I am giving you this crazy advice.

I started my weight loss journey and decided to use a trip to Jamaica as my reward (never had been away with my husband). All my friends were going on weight loss plans that cost a small fortune (read Herbal Magic) - I decided I was not going to pay someone to lose weight (other than a gym membership) I was going to reward ME. So, that drove me to loose the weight and stay on track. I was well into my 200s when I started and was around 160 when we went (took around a year to lose). I was like you. In fact reading your post just was so much like me. I would NEVER EVER EVER wear a bikini and never did - not as a kid or someone in my 20s ot teens. I was always large, so I had stretch marks from that, I had two kids so I had stretch marks from that, I had MOLES (thanks mom and dad for the genes), and I was far from a toned body. Literally the worst body image ever. When I booked our trip I asked my travel agent how many swiming suits I should take - she said you should at least take two bikinis so you can wash them out and they have time to dry. I looked at her shocked and said oh no I won't take a bikini. I would never wear a bikini. And she said - trust me, take a bikini. Just trust me. I thought "ya right - there is no way in H I am going to take a bikini."

So, I was in Old Navy one day looking for summer dresses to take on our trip and noticed the wall of bikini's. I thought - OK, what if I go on an excursion where there may be swimming. Maybe I could take a bikini to wear like underwear, and then I can at least go swimming. I even had a plan - I would quickly throw off my clothes, jump in the ocean, and have my hubby hand me the towel as I got out. So, I grabbed a very plain practial all black basic halter bikini, and for the first time in my life went to the change room and tried it on. It fit, I thought - Ok - underwear. So I reluctantly bought it and I packed the bikini and two tankinis (you know the kind that go past the bottoms - no tummy showing) and was off on my first hot holiday.

So, the first morning I put on a takini and coverup and went to scout out a spot with my hubby. All of a sudden I started noticing women of all shapes and sizes in bikinis. We stumbled across the topless area of the resort and wouzers - big women with bikini bottoms and no tops. I kept looking at my sensible two piece and thinking if they can do it so can I. So, we went for lunch, and after lunch it got REALLY hot. I was still really aware of all the other women in their bikinis and I remember turning to my hubby and saying that I was so hot (sweating hot not cute hot) - did he think that I would look ok in my bikini? He told me "absolutely - you look great - you just don't see what I see. I was really nervous but I think I was even more hot. So, around 2:00, I went to my room and grabbed the bikini and put it on. I threw on a coverup thinking, I could keep this on if I lose my nerve.

I get back to my beach chair and look around at all the women and thought - what is my problem, if THEY can do it so can I. Honestly, that was the single most liberating moment in my adult life. I took off my coverup and literally heard music playing in my head. I COULD wear a bikini. And not one single person looked at me like I shouldn't be. That night I washed out my bikini and wore it again the next day. I even contemplated purchasing one at the resort store, but they were pretty colorful and flashy and I wasn't quite ready for that. So, for 7 days I wore that bikini. By day two my husband told me he had never seen me more confident about the way I looked. Honest to god. I don't think I would have gotton that from several sessions of counselling.

This may also sound strange, but I would recommend if you do this booking a spanish chain resort - Iberostars, Gran Bahias, Barcelos, Grand Palladiiums (there are more) are all spanish chains. Why? Becasue there are lots of Europeans (like from Spain) that go to the spanish ones - there are also alot of north americans - but there are alot of Euopeons. And, Europeans have a WAY more healthy body image outlook that we do - seriously. Sometimes it goes a bit too far (bigger, older guys in banana hammock thongs - lol) but they do have a better image or maybe its just an "I don't give a damn" attitude - in any event it's helpful.

So, fast forward a year later - we booked our 2nd hot holiday. We were going at the end of January. On January 1 I was online a the Victoria's secret website and ordered 4 mix and max bikinis (I had toned up a bit more and lost some more weight in that year), but those stretch marks and moles and the "mommy tummy" was still there. I never even give it a second thought anymore. I did not pack anything but bikinis.

I now own 9 bikinis - halters, bandeaus, colorful, cute, even WHITE (we go on two trips a year - 1 without kids and 1 with kids). They cover up just enough for me not to show a few of those areas I just don't like - and they are appropriate for my age (I am 38 now and was 34 the first year we went) - but seriously I would now DIE before I would pack a tankini or 1 piece.

I know its strange advice - but it worked. It gave me a really healthy view of myself. Just wanted to share.

Love the advice that's flowing! Especially the hot vacation idea!


I bought a bikini for the first time in my life this summer to wear for a spa procedure. I will never wear one in public, only in private, or maybe on a secluded beach but that's due to religious reasons. It USED to be due to self-consciousness too until THIS event where I discovered the right one (for me, a high-waisted bottom with a halter-top) was amazing. I couldn't stop looking in the mirror.

Yes, I have a ton of cellulite now. Yes, the mummy tummy is there (hence the high-waisted bottom). Yes, the girls are droopy from a year of nursing. But WOW! You put that waistband up over the scars and muggy-mammy-belly and you can really see that my workouts have "done a body good."

So I discovered that all those momma-battle-scars don't matter! What matters is that when you look in the mirror you see the progress you made!!

Oh, and most men I talked to about this say they don't care about the imperfections... especially if they were at your side when you were unhealthy. They will care more about how awesome you look at a healthier weight then they will the minor (and I DO mean MINOR) imperfections that seem so large to us in the mirror, and confidence is the best thing a woman can put on!