so lost and confused

Been there. Kind of still there *hugs*

I started in August, after trying to lose weight and failing for years. My problem was undereating, since I was always told eat less, exercise more. Well, I started eating more, and I started losing weight. That keeps me going! I eat what I want, and eat to my goal, and get some fun outdoor exercise in too (I never go to the gym).

Dont think negative from the beginning. Even if you dont believe it, tell yourself you can do it. You'll believe it when the pounds start coming off.

Dont restrict foods, or try crazy new stuff. You have to like your food!! I've lost 30 lbs already, and I eat salty snacks every weekend, I'd had pie and fast food, and I've still lost weight. I even went over a few days. No biggie, gotta keep going.

And do yourself a favour....go stand in front of a mirror, look yourself in the eyes, and tell you that you love yourself (repeat 10 times). You wont get anywhere if you hate yourself!

You can do it.

Im getting to be way overweight. I weigh 255 right now. Ideally i want to lost about 100 lbs but i dont even know where to start. I was eating really healthy and didnt lose a pound i was so discouraged. I'm trying to do it again but i dont want the samr result. I'm really begining to hate my self image and thats not a place i wanna be. I get myself motuvated for like a week and then stop. I jus dont know where to begin and how to stick to it. Im trying to eat more veggies and ive been eating brown rice whole grain bread no soda except a very occasional diet soda. I love food and snacking and over eating is a big problem but i cant seem to break it. I completely feel like im failing. Im starting to walk every day but jus feel like its not enough. I just really dont know where to begin. Im sure sure this doesnt make sense cuz it doesnt even make sense to me. I jus wanna break down and cry. I feel like im never going to lose weight and im always going to be this big.

Before beginning on the path to weighing less it is important to realize a very important fact: You did NOT gain the extra weight overnight – It will not drop overnight either. Expecting to lose a lot of weight quickly is not what we are here for. If you expect to lose 5-10 lbs a week you are in the wrong place. At first you might have a few weeks where you will lose a lot (assuming you have a lot to lose) but this is not normal. I think in my first month I lost close to 20lbs but after that I started to settle into the more acceptable (and sustainable) 1-2lbs / week. This number drops as you lose weight so if you only have 30 lbs to lose your rate of loss per week should be about .5 to 1 lb / week and by the time you have 20 left you should be down to .5/week. Before beginning your journey, fix your expectations if you need to do so. Get comfortable for the long haul.. I lost 60 lbs in my first year. The last 30 will probably take me most of another one. I’m good with that because after everything is said and done I am still 60lbs lighter this year than I was last year and that’s a good thing!

I wrote once that the biggest predictor of how long someone would stick to MFP was the way in which they went about their first few weeks. Of course these are just observations based on my reality so I wouldn’t expect them to be accurate for every single person who has been able to stick with MFP for over a year but I’d be willing to be that they will be accurate for a good percentage. So then, what follows are my insights into the best way for a sedentary overweight person with over 50lbs to lose and without any medical issues to start the transition to a healthier lifestyle using MFP.

1. Do NOT make any changes to your life just yet, Just LOG everything you eat. This accomplishes two very important things. First, it gets you used to the database without having the added stress of exercise and life changes and second it gives you a baseline from which to start your cutting instead of relying on the inaccurate method of the MFP plan which gives virtually everyone the SAME starting point. It makes no sense what so ever to treat every person the same regardless of their fitness level, age, weight, height and other circumstances. If you have this baseline you have a perfect starting point and then you can actually SEE that you are in fact going to be eating less than what you were eating to maintain your current weight. Most people have no idea how much they actually eat on a daily basis. We tend to underestimate our calories and overestimate any activity we do. At 5’6 and 220lbs I was eating easily 2800 calories per day (this was with very little exercise if any).

Find your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate) – this is the MINIMUM number of calories that someone of your height, weight, age and activity level would require just to lay in a coma all day. There are a million links on the internet where you can go to do this and at least 3 or 4 different methods. I’m not going to go into the specifics of each one because I am just not that geeky. Regardless.. Get at least 3 different numbers and then find the average of them (that will be close enough for most people).
Calculate a good starting base number of calories that you will eat starting next week based on your BMR and the average calories you were normally eating this week. The ‘cut’ you take will depend on how much weight you have to lose in the first place. A very large person will be able to cut more than a person who is just trying to lose a couple of pounds. This is without a doubt THE biggest mistake I see being made by many new people and makes a big difference in how motivated you will remain and how easily you start dropping weight.

Trying to cut out everything from your diet and stop eating anything ‘unhealthy’ will only serve to frustrate you, as well as making you tired and hungry. It very rarely ever works out that a cut of 3500 calories / week yields about a pound lost BUT until you have a good set of your own data it’s a good start. For someone with more to lose cut 7000/wk is good also (this is what I did – I cut 1000 calories /day from what I WAS eating) My BMR at 220lbs was @1700. I set my NET to 1800 and went from there. This is why it’s vital to know what you have been eating before you start, that way you don’t fall into the trap of 1200 calories. Now, there ARE some people for whom that number IS right..but normally they are quite old, very short and also quite light and likely just need to lose a few extra pounds. For my example of someone who has over 50lbs to lose.. unless they are over 70 and 3 feet tall 1200 is NOT right.

Buy a food scale – you can get one for about 10$. Try to get one that is as accurate as possible so that you can easily portion foods. Using ‘cups’ is grossly inaccurate and will eventually lead to issues because no one measures a ‘cup’ the same way – some go right to the top, for some it’s level, and for others its just under the rim. It’s EASY to go over your calories by hundreds just because you do not weigh. There’s a great you tube video on the differences between weighing and measuring food here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVjWPclrWVY

You can read the rest in my blog if you want. Needless to say, I have been where you are and it totally IS possible.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/Koldnomore/view/your-first-2-weeks-will-determine-your-success-here-573450

OP:
Read this link and all of the links in it:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants?page=1#posts-16625920

THis...and eating too much regardless of "healthy" often is the reason weight is not being lost....

I know losing weight is not easy but the concept is...calories in <calories out.

My BMR is 1928. So if im taking in 1680 is that a big enough decrease?

If your BMR is 1928, then you should be able to eat 1928 & still lose weight. BMR is what your body burns doing nothing. So the minute you get out of bed & start moving, you are already burning above your BMR. I have my calorie goal set at my BMR & then eat back most of my exercise calories. You can also do a search for TDEE. Calculate that based on activity level & then subtract 15% - 20% to give you a daily goal. With this method you do not need to eat back your exercise calories.