5 Foods You Should Never Eat

Mutant13
Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
Read below for a well researched list of foods you should NOT allow into your body.

1. Cloves.

Cloves taste like liquorice, and for good reason. Cloves are just a poor excuse for candy disguised as a spice. It has been scientifically proven that people who eat liquorice are more likely to be damned to purgatory.

2. Two minute noodles/Ramen.

Two minute noodles are Asian food for racists. You don't want to be racist do you?

3. Marshmallows.

Marshmallows are puffed up with air. Ingesting them will cause you to absorb excess air and become larger.

4. Chair.
In my research I have concluded that chair is not a food. Please do not eat chair meat.

5. Not Bacon.

I was astounded to find amid my studies that some foods are not bacon. Whilst I don't understand why anyone would even consider eating not bacon I am obliged as a man of science to inform you to not do so.

Replies

  • UnitedBoy83
    UnitedBoy83 Posts: 888 Member
    Great research.....compelling and rich :smile:
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    I'm sure you don't need an boring old Aussie but would like it if you do since I think you are really funny most of the time. Today not :laugh:
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I just want to get the truth to the people.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I'm sure you don't need an boring old Aussie but would like it if you do since I think you are really funny most of the time. Today not :laugh:

    As an aussie myself I happen to know none of us are boring. We are all golden skinned, crocodile wrestling superheroes. Right?
  • zorbaru
    zorbaru Posts: 1,077 Member
    I'm sure you don't need an boring old Aussie but would like it if you do since I think you are really funny most of the time. Today not :laugh:

    As an aussie myself I happen to know none of us are boring. We are all golden skinned, crocodile wrestling superheroes. Right?

    thats right, but ill be back a bit later, i have to go refuel my kangaroo for the ride to work in the morning.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I can't travel via kangaroo anymore. Mine has a drinking problem.

    I really shouldn't have used VB as petrol. Everyone knows petrol tastes better
  • myself n stevo the croc have decided to call a temporary truce while I answer this. just wanted to let u know stevo thinks chairs are inedible and that you're silly. don't shoot the messenger.
  • Mother_Superior
    Mother_Superior Posts: 1,624 Member
    tumblr_mjmukcvUXa1s4ztnro1_500.jpg
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    myself n stevo the croc have decided to call a temporary truce while I answer this. just wanted to let u know stevo thinks chairs are inedible and that you're silly. don't shoot the messenger.

    Stevo needs to watch his mouth. I saw him eat a cane toad once
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    tumblr_mjmukcvUXa1s4ztnro1_500.jpg

    Nice
  • 1shauna1
    1shauna1 Posts: 993 Member
    Hahaha, as I'm reading this thread that stupid pop-up ad for the "5 foods you must not eat" is everywhere!
  • erilynbmore
    erilynbmore Posts: 42 Member
    I am convinced!
  • adlace
    adlace Posts: 375 Member
    Dammit! Doin' it wrong again. Chair and marshmallow sandwiches are my trigger food. *Hangs head in shame. Is it ok to love Lamp?
  • dylanafghjkl
    dylanafghjkl Posts: 76 Member
    I'm sure you don't need an boring old Aussie but would like it if you do since I think you are really funny most of the time. Today not :laugh:

    As an aussie myself I happen to know none of us are boring. We are all golden skinned, crocodile wrestling superheroes. Right?
    golden skinned

    YEP THATS ME RIGHT HERE
  • Bucky83
    Bucky83 Posts: 1,194 Member
    Every time I want to travel to work by Kangaroo, he gets killed on the highway. I have to acquire a new kangaroo each day.

    Something to do with having to look right and left before crossing the road.

    Now where's my knife??
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    I'm sure you don't need an boring old Aussie but would like it if you do since I think you are really funny most of the time. Today not :laugh:

    As an aussie myself I happen to know none of us are boring. We are all golden skinned, crocodile wrestling superheroes. Right?

    I live up in the Tropics so yes I am! I love wrestling with those cute crocs. I do it every weekend.
  • ThePlight
    ThePlight Posts: 3,593 Member
    Shoes are also not good to eat. Not that I've tried, but my cats seem to like them. They don't look very nutritious :(