Hubby losing faster that I am :-(

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Replies

  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    My husband has also been dieting, with my help, as I use my calorie count for him, as we eat more or less the same food, and I allow a bit extra for him, as he started at 15st 4lbs and is 6ft, (I'm 5ft and started at 11st 7lbs ) The annoying thing is, although I am very pleased for him, he has lost 16lbs in the same period!

    The swine!

    Men typically have a greater TDEE than women (assuming activity levels are around the same) simply due to the fact they weigh more (and have more lean mass but that is less significant in terms of energy expenditure than overall weight despite the prevailing wisdom.)

    If you are using the same calorie level and he has a higher TDEE then he has a greater calorie deficit and voila - he has lost more weight.

    You could divorce him but that would be a bit harsh...
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    There's a scientific reason for this- men's fat cells are shaped in such a way that makes losing fat easier for them. Men's cells are diamond shaped and ours are square. The square shape doesn't lend itself to shrinking in the way the diamond shape does. Men's muscle mass also plays a role. Muscle allows for a quicker calorie burn, so if you want to start losing quickly start working on building muscle mass!

    I have never heard this theory before. I always understood fat cells to be literally identical between the genders.

    Look it up. Science.

    a diamond is just a square rotated 45 degrees. GEOMETRY!

    S0.gif

    :laugh:
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    OP if you and your husband are eating at close to the same calorie level then he will lose faster than you because he's larger. Your deficit seems perfect since 1 lb per week is a good amount to be losing. His seems like it might be too large.

    Before I lifted weights my husband ate twice as much as I did at dinner time and we lost around the same amount. Now I'm too hungry for that nonsense :laugh: but he still eats a little more than me.
  • metaphoria
    metaphoria Posts: 1,432 Member
    7lb. in 4 weeks is an aggressive loss. Good job!
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    I highly recommend terminating your husband. This will alleviate the problem.
  • JeanRosamundBostock
    JeanRosamundBostock Posts: 4
    I really can't thank all of you enough, for being so kind in replying and giving me so much encouragement. :smile:
  • JeanRosamundBostock
    JeanRosamundBostock Posts: 4
    :laugh: Bit drastic, trouble is I love the rapidly shrinking so and so.
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    :laugh: Bit drastic, trouble is I love the rapidly shrinking so and so.
    :) some may call it drastic. But weight loss is important. Stop at nothing!
  • roniredd
    roniredd Posts: 48
    Let it go and simply be happy for him. My husband and I started around the same time - he is close to losing 70 pounds, me 20.

    1. He had a lot more to lose!
    2. He had more room to cut back his portions then I did ....
    3. He was a complete couch potato before and I was not ....

    Can't let it get to you .....
  • fpelletier
    fpelletier Posts: 365 Member
    Ah yes, I know that feeling all to well! My husband and I are both doing this, I weigh more than he does, he is a few inches taller than I am. We started off about the same, then he took off and past me while I stalled out. I was so blah about it, but knew I'd keep losing. I was like about 15lbs gone and he was closer to 20lbs, then he stalled out and I kept going. I am nearly at 40lbs gone (39.5) and he is at 28lbs gone, we've been at it for slightly over 6 months now.

    Don't get discouraged, know the weight will fluctuate between you and it's OK! :)
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    There's a scientific reason for this- men's fat cells are shaped in such a way that makes losing fat easier for them. Men's cells are diamond shaped and ours are square. The square shape doesn't lend itself to shrinking in the way the diamond shape does. Men's muscle mass also plays a role. Muscle allows for a quicker calorie burn, so if you want to start losing quickly start working on building muscle mass!

    In...

    ...to try to figure this out later.
  • glades250
    glades250 Posts: 10
    Absolutely... Don't compare yourself to others progress. Another thing (from experience) NOT to do is don't focus on speed of the loss. I have just recently started this journey AGAIN. I know my failures. Mine is willpower and no patience. I love food and I want results yesterday. I am 46 years old, 6 foot 3in. and started at 285lbs. (been as high as 304lbs) I just completed firefighter academy and by the skin of my teeth but I never quit!! I know if I had the willpower and patience to do that this journey will be successful and permanent. BUT I don't expect to be "fantabulous" overnight and this journey is going to take time. Good luck and don't get discouraged.
  • emilynw10
    emilynw10 Posts: 60
    My husband actually has to work at NOT losing weight. How unfair is that? If he doesn't take care of what he eats, he loses. And he has a desk job. And he's not overweight. Boo.
  • Dustin710
    Dustin710 Posts: 8 Member
    Men, typically, are genetically predisposed to have a higher percentage of lean body mass than women (1). At rest, the energy expenditure, or calories used, by muscle mass is greater than that used for body fat (2). The brief scientific way of thinking about it is that muscle metabolism utilizes more oxygen than fat tissue metabolism. The metabolic utilization of oxygen, and consquently production of carbon dioxide, is the process in which calories are "burned."(3)

    Although frustrating, your husband is naturally going to lose more weight than you, assuming the same diet and activity level.

    A couple of other thoughts: your husbands BMR is around 1976 calories per day whereas yours is 1397 calories per day. You said that you use calorie count for him and "allow a bit extra." By doing this, you could be allowing him a larger calorie deficit than you allow for yourself.

    If you do have to compare your weight, however, do it by percentage. As of now, you have lost 4.97% and your husband has lost about 7.6% percent, which is really good.

    Also, there may be other underlying factors that aren't obviously apparent. For one, it's helpful to consider if your husband moves around more than you do on a daily basis. Factors that we often overlook as "exercise" can include our hobbies, our jobs (standing, walking, lifting..), and other miscellaneous daily tasks (i.e. walking the dog, mowing the lawn, raking leaves, etc.).

    The key is, as pointed out by everyone else, just try to focus on your own realistic and personal goals. Continue pushing forward, and don't be discouraged by your husband's success, be encouraging and proud.

    You are doing really well. Keep it up.


    Also, I have to call BS on the difference in fat cells between men and women. Adipocytes (aka "fat cells") have no specific shape. They are polymorphic, which is why it is so difficult for researchers to measure the exact size of adipose tissue (4). The only significant difference is where they are bodily stored on different genders...read a book.



    Sources:
    (1) http://jap.physiology.org/content/89/1/81
    (2) http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC296885/
    (3) http://www.unm.edu/~lkravitz/Article folder/caloricexp.html
    (4) http://www.jlr.org/content/43/6/986.long
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    Men, typically, are genetically predisposed to have a higher percentage of lean body mass than women (1). At rest, the energy expenditure, or calories used, by muscle mass is greater than that used for body fat (2). The brief scientific way of thinking about it is that muscle metabolism utilizes more oxygen than fat tissue metabolism. The metabolic utilization of oxygen, and consquently production of carbon dioxide, is the process in which calories are "burned."(3)

    Although frustrating, your husband is naturally going to lose more weight than you, assuming the same diet and activity level.

    A couple of other thoughts: your husbands BMR is around 1976 calories per day whereas yours is 1397 calories per day. You said that you use calorie count for him and "allow a bit extra." By doing this, you could be allowing him a larger calorie deficit than you allow for yourself.

    If you do have to compare your weight, however, do it by percentage. As of now, you have lost 4.97% and your husband has lost about 7.6% percent, which is really good.

    Also, there may be other underlying factors that aren't obviously apparent. For one, it's helpful to consider if your husband moves around more than you do on a daily basis. Factors that we often overlook as "exercise" can include our hobbies, our jobs (standing, walking, lifting..), and other miscellaneous daily tasks (i.e. walking the dog, mowing the lawn, raking leaves, etc.).

    The key is, as pointed out by everyone else, just try to focus on your own realistic and personal goals. Continue pushing forward, and don't be discouraged by your husband's success, be encouraging and proud.

    You are doing really well. Keep it up.


    Also, I have to call BS on the difference in fat cells between men and women. Adipocytes (aka "fat cells") have no specific shape. They are polymorphic, which is why it is so difficult for researchers to measure the exact size of adipose tissue (4). The only significant difference is where they are bodily stored on different genders...read a book.



    Sources:
    (1) http://jap.physiology.org/content/89/1/81
    (2) http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC296885/
    (3) http://www.unm.edu/~lkravitz/Article folder/caloricexp.html
    (4) http://www.jlr.org/content/43/6/986.long

    I like posters who include sources with their posts. :drinker:
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    Men, typically, are genetically predisposed to have a higher [ . . . ]

    Here since December 2011. 3 posts.

    Signal to noise ratio approaching ∞:1.

    standing-ovation.gif
  • stat1124
    stat1124 Posts: 163 Member
    Awww, don't think of it as a race, but a journey together. Realize that you BOTH are winning together because you both are getting more healthy. Also it is very very common for women to experience weight loss at a slower rate initially than men. Also you can account for multitude of different things that could be increasing his rate or decreasing yours. I wouldn't concern myself with how much Im losing and how fast, Just rejoice in the fact that you ARE losing it and in time you will reach your goal and be a happier version of yourself! ;) Good Luck and Keep Working Hard!
  • redladywitch
    redladywitch Posts: 799 Member
    There's a scientific reason for this- men's fat cells are shaped in such a way that makes losing fat easier for them. Men's cells are diamond shaped and ours are square. The square shape doesn't lend itself to shrinking in the way the diamond shape does. Men's muscle mass also plays a role. Muscle allows for a quicker calorie burn, so if you want to start losing quickly start working on building muscle mass!

    Are you getting your information from the 2006 blog?
    http://www.carbohydrate-guide.com/womens-fat-cells-are-different-than-mens/

    or

    Are you getting your information from this 2008 blog?
    http://smallstepstohealth.com/2008/05/differences-between-the-fat-cells-in-women-and-men/


    Although the woman in 2008 uses two books as a basis for her opinion, I'm skeptical about fat cells being shaped differently. If you would be so kind as to list your references....that would be great.

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