2 Be Friend or no 2 Be Friend :)

FelipaJ
FelipaJ Posts: 71
edited September 22 in Chit-Chat
I think I'm weird about my friend requests :laugh:
So I was wondering if anyone else does this...
If I get a friend request from someone I don't know (in real life) and there's no msg...I decline it :blushing:
Does anyone else do this :huh:

And I ALWAYS send a msg with a friend request, letting the person know why I want to be friends :flowerforyou:

Replies

  • Wiitabax
    Wiitabax Posts: 284
    Sounds fair to me - I do that on facebook and ask "why the HELL do you want to be friends with a fool like me?" :laugh: - often it's because they've read my 'comedy' stuff or seen some of my spoof vids... but if I don't get an answer, or don't know them, I ignore.
  • BexC
    BexC Posts: 53
    Most of friend reqs I get are where I have posted some info on medical condition i have which effects my weight and when they dont include message I just look at profile and can see they have it, I very rarely decline as surely we are all here for support lol but thats just me! x
  • I never put a message on my requests... oops :) , never know what to say
  • Natural
    Natural Posts: 461 Member
    i accept all friend requests here. i'm only here to motivate and talk about diet, exercise and fitness, etc. so i'm NOT sharing any personal information, unlike facebook where i do share a little more than usual.

    i'm okay if someone wants to be my friend, i can't say that i blame them. ha. :) i can give anybody a high five or a little motivation if that's all they want. not a problem.

    i also never leave a message either unless it's obvious that we have something in common like books or photography.
  • mykaar74
    mykaar74 Posts: 253
    well considering how we are all here for motivation, and support to lose, maintain, or even gain I accept any request rather with a message or not. I send my request based on maybe a blog someone wrote that inspired me in some way. And more than likely that's why someone is sending you a request, or either you actually know you outside of the virtual world. But that's just me
  • catcrazy
    catcrazy Posts: 1,740 Member
    Decline on FB but not on here, we're all here for support but when I send a request I usually include a message, even if its to say "feel free to decline" lol
  • FelipaJ
    FelipaJ Posts: 71
    Decline on FB but not on here, we're all here for support but when I send a request I usually include a message, even if its to say "feel free to decline" lol

    lol...how could you possibly decline a request like that :laugh:
  • Wiitabax
    Wiitabax Posts: 284
    Decline on FB but not on here, we're all here for support but when I send a request I usually include a message, even if its to say "feel free to decline" lol

    Fair comments re: the support thing - in that case, if ANYONE here wants to add me as a friend, I'll be happy to accept - I need all the support I can get, plus I reckon I'm pretty good in the encouragement and motivational stakes too!

    Thanks for that, and to others who've commented on this - certainly made me think.

    Here's to meeting new friends!!!

    :smile:
  • casshie
    casshie Posts: 10 Member
    Like others here, the more friends the more motivation and support. I don't always remember to send a message with new friend requests.

    On FB, I only add people I know IRL.
  • FelipaJ
    FelipaJ Posts: 71
    Thanks for all the comments. I know that we're all here for generally the same reason, I just don't see how someone with 100+ friends can truly be supportive and encouraging.
    LOL....or maybe I'm just not the type to do it. Or maybe I just feel like I couldn't be 100% there for you without knowing what are common ground is.....hmmmm....lots of inner reflection happening now.
  • Wiitabax
    Wiitabax Posts: 284
    hmmmm....lots of inner reflection happening now.

    Yep - it certainly made me think too! :smile:

    But for now - I've decided to auction myself eBay style lol - in a 'bid' to get friends, here's the pitch:


    I'm Neil.
    38
    Married
    One Wife
    1 Gerbil
    2 Dogs

    Job: Psychiatric Nurse.

    Interests: Comedy, Playing Guitar, Photography, Making vids/remixing tunes and trying to lose weight ("well D'UH lol) :laugh:

    Favourite Music: I LOVE Lady Gaga, but I'm also hugely into a mix of allsorts from the Beatles to lots of Heavy Metal stuff.

    Fave Film: Cast Away (Tom Hanks)

    Fave 'junk' food: Cheese & Tomato Pizza with Jalapeno and Pineapple

    Fave 'healthy' food: Ah come on - do I HAVE to do this? :laugh: okay... tuna! Love it! :smile:

    Fave alcoholic drink: no sorry lol, rare to find in the U.K. but I don't drink!



    Any bids there? :laugh:
  • Cytherea
    Cytherea Posts: 515 Member
    Definitely on sites like facebook, but not here. Most people friended me after a message convo or some response in a thread. Since we are all here for the same reason, I don't see why not. It isn't like we have to share anything too personal. But I definitely do NOT have 100 friends and I don't go out of my way to add people. But it is nice to get the occasional encouraging comment on weight loss or exercise and such. Most of my RL friends aren't on here, so it isn't like I'm inundated with too many people. I think a site like this is very different from other sites like facebook, where I would NEVER add a person a didn't know (and usually, I don't even people that I DO know! LOL).
  • FelipaJ
    FelipaJ Posts: 71
    Definitely on sites like facebook, but not here. Most people friended me after a message convo or some response in a thread. Since we are all here for the same reason, I don't see why not. It isn't like we have to share anything too personal. But I definitely do NOT have 100 friends and I don't go out of my way to add people. But it is nice to get the occasional encouraging comment on weight loss or exercise and such. Most of my RL friends aren't on here, so it isn't like I'm inundated with too many people. I think a site like this is very different from other sites like facebook, where I would NEVER add a person a didn't know (and usually, I don't even people that I DO know! LOL).

    I get friend request from ppl that I've never had convo's with or even seen in other thread, with 100+ friends, I guess that's why I wonder why they want to be my friend. Not that I'm "inundated" cuz really....who would really want to be my friend :laugh:
    I do have RL friends on here, only you can't see them right now because I just deleted my old acct and started this one.
    I guess I'm lucky in the sense that I have a huge support system out side of this site.

    haha...maybe I just decline them because I'm not the type to coddle someone. I pretty much don't comment on any of the "oh poor me post" because I just don't get it. I'm sarcastic and I'm blunt all at the same time and as a RL friend told me yesterday, I can be pretty harsh...if she didn't love me she wouldn't understand why she was my friend. Granted there's more to that story.
    On the same token I had a friend who's fighting cancer tell me she'd rather talk to me because I don't give the 'scripted' answers everyone else gives :laugh:
  • MissingMinnesota
    MissingMinnesota Posts: 7,486 Member
    I will accept any friend request but if I see that they never post any thing and are just trying to get as many friends as possible I will then delete them as a friend. I guess I give everyone the benefit of the doubt here that they are here to support eachother not just get the most friends.
  • LotusF1ower
    LotusF1ower Posts: 1,259 Member
    When I first joined MFP, I declined two or three because I didn't know why they wanted to be my buddy and they didn't include a message. However, I regret doing that, now I would accept anybody as a buddy on here unless they have let down the tyres on my car or put a brick through my window or something like that!

    My view on this site is this, I haven't put very much in the way of personal information on my profile and as somebody said earlier if we all support each other, it makes it that much easier to get through this weightloss thing. I have met some wonderful people on here and made some brilliant friends too, that would not have happened if I hadn't accepted them onto my buddy list.

    I love everybody on this site, seen a hell of a lot of courage here, to say it has been inspiring is doing it an injustice and putting it lightly!
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
    Hmmm never had one declined, I don't think. Maybe from this point on I'll add the message, "Sooo what are you wearing?"
  • Natural
    Natural Posts: 461 Member
    When I first joined MFP, I declined two or three because I didn't know why they wanted to be my buddy and they didn't include a message. However, I regret doing that, now I would accept anybody as a buddy on here unless they have let down the tyres on my car or put a brick through my window or something like that!

    My view on this site is this, I haven't put very much in the way of personal information on my profile and as somebody said earlier if we all support each other, it makes it that much easier to get through this weightloss thing. I have met some wonderful people on here and made some brilliant friends too, that would not have happened if I hadn't accepted them onto my buddy list.

    I love everybody on this site, seen a hell of a lot of courage here, to say it has been inspiring is doing it an injustice and putting it lightly!

    i befriend you (Lotus) because i LOVED a comment you wrote on the boards. a woman asked if she should take a break or rest from exercising and you said you don't mean to get all biblical on her but even God rested on the 7th day. that was the best comment ever on this board, to me. i loved it and it tickled me to death. i had to be your "friend." i love people with a sense of humor.
  • Wiitabax
    Wiitabax Posts: 284
    Hmmm never had one declined, I don't think. Maybe from this point on I'll add the message, "Sooo what are you wearing?"

    Well okay... jogging bottoms and t-shirt!

    :laugh:
  • just4peachy
    just4peachy Posts: 594 Member
    i accept all friend requests here. i'm only here to motivate and talk about diet, exercise and fitness, etc. so i'm NOT sharing any personal information, unlike facebook where i do share a little more than usual.

    i'm okay if someone wants to be my friend, i can't say that i blame them. ha. :) i can give anybody a high five or a little motivation if that's all they want. not a problem.

    I feel the exact same way.
  • ginnyroxx
    ginnyroxx Posts: 763
    Hmmm never had one declined, I don't think. Maybe from this point on I'll add the message, "Sooo what are you wearing?"
    hahaaaaa

    i just woke up so i'll give you 1 guess ;)
  • ♥_Ellybean_♥
    ♥_Ellybean_♥ Posts: 1,646 Member
    Here I will add anyone... because the more support the better.


    Facebook is a whole different story, since I Post a lot of personal stuff... if you do not send a message with your request then I decline or I email and say "Do I know you"..
  • FelipaJ
    FelipaJ Posts: 71
    Hmmm never had one declined, I don't think. Maybe from this point on I'll add the message, "Sooo what are you wearing?"


    :laugh: too funny.
  • JStarnes
    JStarnes Posts: 5,576 Member
    Here I will add anyone... because the more support the better.


    Facebook is a whole different story, since I Post a lot of personal stuff... if you do not send a message with your request then I decline or I email and say "Do I know you"..
    Ditto.

    I'll friend anybody on here (unless they're total creeper lol) but FB I have to know you (and more than just meeting one time in a bar) to accept a request.
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
    I usually don't send a friend request unless there is something in their posts or their profile that makes me feel we have some commonality.

    When I get a friend request, I usually send a thank you email and open up some kind of dialogue. Want to make sure there is some reason besides the usual attraction to my animal sexuality.
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    I accept any friend request on MFP but on Facebook I only accept friend requests from people I know.
  • Cytherea
    Cytherea Posts: 515 Member
    haha...maybe I just decline them because I'm not the type to coddle someone. I pretty much don't comment on any of the "oh poor me post" because I just don't get it. I'm sarcastic and I'm blunt all at the same time and as a RL friend told me yesterday, I can be pretty harsh...if she didn't love me she wouldn't understand why she was my friend. Granted there's more to that story.
    On the same token I had a friend who's fighting cancer tell me she'd rather talk to me because I don't give the 'scripted' answers everyone else gives :laugh:

    LOLOLOLOLOLOL oh my gosh, I think we would get along GREAT! :laugh: I'm totally the same way. I really don't respond to most status updates of my friends... for a few reasons. Some things I don't think need to be commented on (like that they logged all their food today or have signed in for a few days), others, a ton of people have already commented so mine really isn't needed, and yet others still if I commented it would be something pretty blunt and I don't think it would be taken too well! lol

    What I WILL comment on is weight loss, if I see it. If somebody has been working really hard and it is paying off, I will always comment on that because I do think that is great, and it proves that if you stick with it, you can do it too.

    I've never, actually, as far as I can tell, been friended by someone who is just trying to get a higher number of friends. If I was though that would probably bug me and I might reject them.
  • FelipaJ
    FelipaJ Posts: 71
    I usually don't send a friend request unless there is something in their posts or their profile that makes me feel we have some commonality.

    When I get a friend request, I usually send a thank you email and open up some kind of dialogue. Want to make sure there is some reason besides the usual attraction to my animal sexuality.

    Just to let you know....I'm fighting the urge to friend you due to the attraction :laugh:
  • edorice
    edorice Posts: 4,519 Member
    I usually don't send a friend request unless there is something in their posts or their profile that makes me feel we have some commonality.

    I don't send out a bunch of friend requests. Maybe two since I've been on the site. I like to have something in common first as well. I like to surround myself with people who are:
    1: driven
    2: people I can learn from.
    3: doing the same workouts that I'm doing.
    4: again...driven.
  • It is always nice to have a message with a invite. I have accepted with out them though because I think the more friends that are wanting to help one another on their journeys the better. I do however check out their profile sometimes. I have had one person invite me as a friend on here and I looked at her page just to see that it looked like a teenagers myspace. Full of high school stuff and nothing to really do with weight.
  • ♡MyCurves
    ♡MyCurves Posts: 103 Member
    No, i don't decline :noway: . I read their profile first and make my choice upon that....I have never declined one as of yet . When i send a friend request, i don't add a message. ooops lol:ohwell:
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