Feeling depressed...like a failure!

janetbr
janetbr Posts: 20 Member
edited September 19 in Introduce Yourself
I have started and stopped so many diets. I joined this site about two weeks ago and the first week I did pretty good. Then last week we went on a small vacation and I totally blew it. I have about 30 lbs to lose and it seems all I want to do is eat. I know what I need to do to lose the weight, but I can't seem to get myself in the right frame of mind. My son is deployed and my stress level is extremely high. I just want to feel good about myself, and feel better mentally and physically. I know 30 lbs is doable, but it just seems like it'll take forever. Any suggestions on how to feel better about myself and not feel like such a failure? What's a good way to get started on making healthy changes and to stick with it?

Thanks.

Replies

  • janetbr
    janetbr Posts: 20 Member
    I have started and stopped so many diets. I joined this site about two weeks ago and the first week I did pretty good. Then last week we went on a small vacation and I totally blew it. I have about 30 lbs to lose and it seems all I want to do is eat. I know what I need to do to lose the weight, but I can't seem to get myself in the right frame of mind. My son is deployed and my stress level is extremely high. I just want to feel good about myself, and feel better mentally and physically. I know 30 lbs is doable, but it just seems like it'll take forever. Any suggestions on how to feel better about myself and not feel like such a failure? What's a good way to get started on making healthy changes and to stick with it?

    Thanks.
  • tanzmamma
    tanzmamma Posts: 368 Member
    The big thing is you have to 100% want it and be willing to work toward it. The weight didnt come on over night and it's going to take time to get it off.

    If you're 100% committed to it and willing to put in the time and effort needed, you can do it!

    It's not going to be easy... it requires work! But - like i said if you want it bad enough you can make it happen!!!
  • TNTPete
    TNTPete Posts: 701 Member
    Make small changes
    Accept that it won't happen in a day
    Celebrate your success - no matter how small you make think it is
    Share when you feel disappointed
    (My favorite) Post your intentions - makes it more real and makes you own up to it!

    It will take time, but we're all here to help! Good Luck.:wink:

    Lastly - BE POSITIVE!!! YOU ARE A WORTHY PERSON AND YOU HAVE VALUE. :flowerforyou:
  • sculley
    sculley Posts: 2,012 Member
    I found planning days out ahead of time helps. believe me 30lbs is doable. I almost at the 30lb mark. Just cause you fell off for a week doesn't ruin it hun get back on and stay focused.

    I know you can do it and if you stick to this site it will be done :wink:
  • GinaB30
    GinaB30 Posts: 725 Member
    I have started and stopped so many diets. I joined this site about two weeks ago and the first week I did pretty good. Then last week we went on a small vacation and I totally blew it. I have about 30 lbs to lose and it seems all I want to do is eat. I know what I need to do to lose the weight, but I can't seem to get myself in the right frame of mind. My son is deployed and my stress level is extremely high. I just want to feel good about myself, and feel better mentally and physically. I know 30 lbs is doable, but it just seems like it'll take forever. Any suggestions on how to feel better about myself and not feel like such a failure? What's a good way to get started on making healthy changes and to stick with it?

    Thanks.

    I gotta be honest and say, I don't think anyone sticks with it 100% all of the time...we all *slip up*...we all get lazy and skip a day of exercise (or can't work out because of something, etc)...
    I have just kept up with this and if I have a *bad day* because of something (like AF coming LOL) than I just mark it off and start over the next day.
    Keep at it. That's the key!
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    Honey, pick yourself up and start over. Don't worry about the set back. Start again. Devote yourself. Stick to it. Visit this site religiously. This is a supportive community (with a lot of military family, I've discovered). Reach out to us, make friends, come to us for support and cheerleading. It's what we all do!! :flowerforyou:

    You can do this!!! I've recently met my 30lb goal and am now surpassing it. It takes dilligence and discipline, but it's worth it. You can do this too!! :heart:


    EDIT:
    Also remember that this is NOT a diet. This is a lifestyle change, learning to be healthy, to eat healthy, to exercise. I use this site as a means to train myself on how to be healthy and how to lose weight now. Years from now, I won't need to log my foods and exercise-- healthy me will just be!
  • vickyt
    vickyt Posts: 110 Member
    Just stick to it, just you being here is a big step. If you're feeling hungry all the time, you may not be eating the right types of food. Also, when you feel hungry, have a glass of water, dehydration can produce a similar feeling to hunger!!!
    Best of luck:wink:
  • janetbr
    janetbr Posts: 20 Member
    I do want it, but it's like my mind is thinking one thing and my mouth another. :embarassed: I know it's totally up to me to either fail or succeed. I just need to figure out on how to get started and stick with it. I've read a lot of the messages on this board and it seems so many people have success stories. I want to be one of those stories!!!
  • wintergirl1
    wintergirl1 Posts: 6
    You can do it...stay focused. It's a journey. Take a long walk if you can and clear your head. You are capable of anything you put your mind to!
  • janetbr
    janetbr Posts: 20 Member
    Thank you all so much for the encourgement. The quote that got me the most is:

    "Lastly - BE POSITIVE!!! YOU ARE A WORTHY PERSON AND YOU HAVE VALUE."

    It brought tears to my eyes! I know I should feel worthy and have value, but a lot of times I don't. This is something I'm working on as well. It's hard to let myself believe I deserve the best. (Divorce kid syndome I call it. )

    So, my goal is to visit this site at least twice a day, make wise choices and to exercise everyday this week for at least 30 mins. It's a start!
  • tanzmamma
    tanzmamma Posts: 368 Member
    RIGHT whoever said it's not a "DIET".. you're 100000000000000000000% right. You have to change your life.... to make it work and to make it last.

    You can do it. EVERYBODY has a bad day!!! Everybody has a day where they just don't feel like getting up to work out. It's ok.. just start the next day fresh and focused.
  • tracigarrison82
    tracigarrison82 Posts: 4
    HI! first and formost never call yourself a failure, it you start with that mindset you will never meet your goal. Go into it saying I will do this!!! If you slip up one day that's fine just get back on the next day. I also feel hungry a lot but I always keep a bottle of water with me and when I feel hungry I drink water. It is an easy way to curve your appetite and keep your daily water amount up. Trust me you can do it!

    I am new to this site and I have lost 9 pounds so far. I am so very excited to continue to my goal. Everyone here is very supportive and anytime you need to vent we are all here.....keep up the good work and you will do it!!!
  • country
    country Posts: 57
    Janet, Give yourself a break. It is going to be hard for at least a month and then you will see that your lifestyle changes and it gets way easier. I was the same way the first month always thinking man I miss this food and I miss that food and I plane just want to dive into this food. As you fight the temptation it will get easier I promise! You will do great.
  • pavang82
    pavang82 Posts: 454 Member
    i felt like that depressed and a failure. i'd joined the gym then quit. however, when i wasn't exercising, i was really stressful and it made me more depressed. i think exercising made me feel alot better and i like it when i sweat. i've taken a month off and now i have been exercising again and it has only been a week. YOU CAN DO IT. (^ _ ^) !
  • tamibennettruckman
    tamibennettruckman Posts: 1
    Janet, I've lost 95 pounds in the last two years. The most important thing I have learned is simply not to quit. It doesn't matter how long it takes, how fast it goes, or what I did or didn't eat. It doesn't matter how you do it, what you eat, how much you exercise - just keep going.

    It is like a kaleidoscope - the more you keep going, the clearer the picture. You'll figure out what to eat, how to exercise.
  • oczkowae
    oczkowae Posts: 2
    My advice .. don't let an entire day go to waste because of one slip up. I too have started and stopped too many diets to count. I sometimes crack and have a dough nut or something for breakfast, but that doesn't make my day an entire write off. Instead of saying "today's already blown, I'll start again tomorrow." Think more like, "Okay that wasn't good, but I'll get back on track right now". Also try exercising, and start small .. it will boost endorphins, which over time make you HAPPIER! :smile:
    Good luck!!


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  • missbehavin1
    missbehavin1 Posts: 1
    Today is my first day on this site but I wanted to let you know Janet, that I feel just like you and I think that together we can conquer this!
    also I wanted to tell you a great big THANK YOU:flowerforyou: for sharing your son with us. I can only imagine how hard that must be for you. Please know that you and your son are in my families prayers and we are wishing him a safe and soon return.
    amy
  • graciegirl100
    graciegirl100 Posts: 7
    you sound a lot like me a while back, I would lose a pound or two on a diet, and a few weeks later I would gain that weight back and more. I too thought I was a failure, and would get mad at myself. Now I try to take it one day at a time, and instead of turning to food in times of stress I now turn to my friends, and family.
    good luck megan:flowerforyou:
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  • cnolovechild
    cnolovechild Posts: 179
    Don't focus so much on the lbs you have to lose....focus on getting healthier. Get excited about small things like learning to cook things differently...like with more fresh veggies or replacing butter with something healthier like olive oil...
    I know thats it's hard to get started but once you do you'll start getting really happy about the changes that you will be making to your life. :flowerforyou:
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