"you look sick"

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13

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  • MercenaryNoetic26
    MercenaryNoetic26 Posts: 2,747 Member
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    Get used to it. Some people don't like change. They'll never accept the newer, leaner you because the saw you "filled" your whole life. Screw them.
  • AllonsYtotheTardis
    AllonsYtotheTardis Posts: 16,947 Member
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    they didn't seem worried enough about my health to talk to me about it when I was obese, so they don't get to talk to me about it now that I'm finally at a healthy weight.

    Period. I flat out won't tolerate it, or continue the conversation.


    However... if they ask how, so they can do it too, I will tell them.
  • ronrstaats
    ronrstaats Posts: 294 Member
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    However... if they ask how, so they can do it too, I will tell them.

    The problem I run into is people expect some magic pill helped me along. No one wants to hear Watching what I ate, Hitting the Gym, and Time.
  • Nicholec2003
    Nicholec2003 Posts: 158 Member
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    How about "You're losing too much weight, I can see you collar bones." :huh: Wait...You can see my collar bones!!! :happy:
  • nicenhealthy
    nicenhealthy Posts: 61
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    I actually got told I look like a holocaust survivor too via my mother, about 2-3 years ago, because I got into weight training and looked amazing. I just kind of looked at her like this:
    tumblr_mwi41i5qft1qgggsqo1_500.gif

    Be a confident and sassy diet king/queen!
    tumblr_mwotr4SWjG1s7ih9do1_400.jpg
  • sybrix
    sybrix Posts: 134 Member
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    It feels like, at least for me, that being fat is a sensitive topic and friends and family don't want to go there. However, when you start dropping lbs then you're fair game, and your weight is no longer a taboo subject.

    When I was gaining weight as a kid, my dad mentioned something about my weight gain once that I can remember. As my weight crept up nothing was ever really mentioned in concern. The vast majority of both sides of my family is overweight/obese. I didn't stand out.

    I'm much thinner now, and have gotten everything from my dentist asking me how I'm doing it, to my parents asking if I'm "eating anything" (i.e. "Are you anorexic or something?") when I visit and they see me avoiding the massive quantities I used to scarf down. They're used to seeing a different person, and the thinner version is of-putting to them. I haven't told them I still have more to lose or they'd probably think I was nuts.

    Every time I visit home my weight is brought up now. It never used to be mentioned when I was fat! :laugh:
  • NewLIFEstyle4ME
    NewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 4,440 Member
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    Awwww...I'm sorry about this, as if it were me, depending on the source...it could possibly be concerning to me:flowerforyou:

    The GREATER majority of all of the people I've seen personally that lose weight, not only look so much better (more beautiful or handsome and super healthier and just plain admirable to me), but they also look so much younger and stronger after losing weight to me as well. Now I have seen some people lose weight (say 20-50 pounds) after being slightly or a bit overweight (not obese) and wow...they looked terrible, sickly and like someone said here--like they had aids or cancer or dying. One woman in particular I'm thinking of I ran into was thrilled to see me and to show me her new slim look and I smiled and said "way to go"...but in my heart (and hopefully NOT in my eyes) I was thinking--
    :frown: :sick: :embarassed: :cry: :indifferent: because she looked absolutely terrible. I HATED that she asked me how did I think she looked, because I'm not a good liar (I've got a poker face, big time) when she asked me how she looked and I just gave her a hug and said congrats on your success...and told her that she's a sweetheart, and changed the subject QUICK. Most all formerly obese and overweight people that lose weight look super tremendous dropping down to a "normal or healthy" weight and size to me.

    So, some people can and do look terrible when losing weight...but more often than not, they will look and feel even more fabulous than they did when they were fat/flabby and outta shape.

    To each is own, however...I value people's opinions, especially loved ones and those I KNOW care about me--so if someone I "respect" tells me I'm not looking too good with my weight loss, rather than blowing it off--I'm going to "pray about it" and seek some help from one of my real life fitness pals (someone who is living a healthy lifestyle and looks fabulous & healthy to me) or personal trainer or something. Now if it's coming from someone I don't respect (say someone sloppy looking/obese/overweight and unhealthy) tell me that I'm not looking good after dropping weight in a healthy manner or someone with some kinda of negative agenda--Well, I'll thank them sincerely for their concern, ask them to pray for me and then ask them ...How you doing? And put the focus/change the conversation to and on them!

    ETA: BTW, I took a peek at your pics and you look super terrific--high fives to you sir!!!!
  • AllonsYtotheTardis
    AllonsYtotheTardis Posts: 16,947 Member
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    However... if they ask how, so they can do it too, I will tell them.

    The problem I run into is people expect some magic pill helped me along. No one wants to hear Watching what I ate, Hitting the Gym, and Time.

    true. I'm concise in my answer - "I count calories and move more"

    that's about all I bother with.
  • PapaverSomniferum
    PapaverSomniferum Posts: 2,677 Member
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    I hear it the most when I don't wear make-up
    .
    .
    .


    but sometimes, when i go through a rough patch, and I gain some weight back, older, overweight relatives say,

    "oh thank goodness! you look more HEALTHY now! you were starting to look sick."

    of course, when I first lost the weight, they told me I looked "great"
  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,346 Member
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    Yep I got this a lot at my lowest weight. Unfortunately it was a little true. I lose a lot of fat from my face even when I still have some around my waist and back. Leaves my face looking pretty sunken in.
  • ellantz8
    ellantz8 Posts: 619
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    My goodness yes! I had multiple people tell me this! "You need to stop dieting, you look sick" but I feel great, I have more energy and trust me I haven't lost too much, still several pounds from a healthy BMI. I have lost it quickly though and lost a lot in my face. I was starting to get a complex so I asked my best friend because I knew she would be honest, she says I'm good, so no complex necessary I'm gonna keep on keepin' on...
  • moya_rargh
    moya_rargh Posts: 1,473 Member
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    Oh my God, this is my life at the moment! After dropping from 16st to 11st 3lbs in 3 years, going from fat and unhappy to feeling great, people are now concerned for me. Biscuits and cakes are left on my desk, my relatives (who used to take great pleasure in teasing me when I was fat) now worry about my weight loss and health. Smokers and diabetics lecturing someone who lifts weights, runs 10k and who eats healthily.

    It's jealousy. Nothing more, nothing less. Keep improving and give the haters even more to be jealous of - sorry, I mean 'concerned about.'
  • marioalberto1
    marioalberto1 Posts: 142 Member
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    I guess it comes down to if you lose enough weight you will hear "you look sick" from some people. I've seen two persons that have lost a lot of weight fast that I thought looked sick. Losing 40-50 pounds in three months doing weight loss shakes from Kaiser Permanente.

    I think it's funny how I used to be a skinny teenager, weight around 155 pounds in high school. I heard the you "look sick" comment from a couple of relatives and also my wife, who knew me as a skinny guy. I'm 40 pounds heavier right now at 195 pounds.
  • vanguardfitness
    vanguardfitness Posts: 720 Member
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    My grandmother tells me that. And of course she was the one always trying to stuff me. Those crazy old puerto rican women... we don't live on a farm anymore. No need to eat like it will be my last meal... at every meal
  • tawanda6329
    tawanda6329 Posts: 139 Member
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    I work with a guy who was average size and looked fine to me. He has since lost weight and his face, neck and head all look smaller and sunken in. I had to ask one of his friends if he was ok. I thought maybe he had cancer or something. And I'm not jealous of him. He looks sick.

    If you don't feel like you look sick, I would just brush off the comments.
  • Danni3ll3
    Danni3ll3 Posts: 365 Member
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    People don't like change and it bothers them when what they expect isn't there. I have a friend that has lost a huge amount of weight and I keep thinking that she looks like skin and bones. It is almost like talking to a stranger. This isn't a conscious thing on my part, it is just automatic and I catch myself at it.

    The ironic thing is that I get the same thing after a 57 pound loss. I get people who tell me I look great but don't lose anymore. Yesterday, I had someone tell me that my face was too thin.

    People who have met me since my weight loss can't picture me with the weight on. Like I said, people don't like change.
  • suziepoo1984
    suziepoo1984 Posts: 915 Member
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    Yup, i have got this one once before when i had lost weight(twice actually) On both occasions(i was very young and immature), i took that as a sign that i should eat more and ended up spiraling out of control!
    I also get, you looked better when you were chubby etc all the time.
    Even now, i am starting to get this from my parents, while as i still have a lot of fat to lose. Now i just ignore :drinker:
  • marioalberto1
    marioalberto1 Posts: 142 Member
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    Yup, i have got this one once before when i had lost weight(twice actually) On both occasions(i was very young and immature), i took that as a sign that i should eat more and ended up spiraling out of control!
    I also get, you looked better when you were chubby etc all the time.
    Even now, i am starting to get this from my parents, while as i still have a lot of fat to lose. Now i just ignore :drinker:
    That's where I am at, I am still 10-15 pounds from goal and these comments were making me second guess myself.
  • redsnapper8
    redsnapper8 Posts: 31 Member
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    Do you often hear this from people who are themselves thin? Or is it more from people who could stand to lose a few pounds? :huh:

    I get something similar from time to time and it is nearly always from people who could stand to lose a few pounds themselves
  • davenporter
    davenporter Posts: 30 Member
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    This is one of the most irritating things for me. People saying "aren't you going to stop losing weight now?" It makes me want to show them the belly fat that I still have to get rid of.

    I think some of it is jealousy. Some of it may be still wearing your old (large) clothes, but I don't want to purchase new ones until I reach my final weight. I still have about 10-15 pounds to go!

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