What do you think?

Hi everyone!

I'm going to try to make this short, but I don't know if I will succeed!

I was a normal weight till around 23, when I just suddenly gained a bunch of weight. Every once in a while I would suddenly bump up 8-12lbs without changing anything I was doing. I decided to "do something about it" a few years back, and it was super SUPER hard, but I managed to lose about 2 pounds a month and got down to my lowest weight since the whole weight issue, and that was 212.

I got pregnant, and so I just let my body be. I was 220 when I delivered, but I gained 30lbs nursing my baby. Lucky me right? Most women lose…

When my daughter was about a year and a half old I joined a gym and worked my butt off and didn't lose a thing. In fact, in April (I remember it so well) I suddenly gained 8 pounds in about a week and a half, without changing a thing!

Time went by and I was now 258 and still working out and watching what I was eating. I did join MFP and I just became depressed because the stupid ticker said I should be losing weight and nothing was happening. I stopped everything. Why bother right?

I lost 14lbs last Jan when I had a bad case of the flu. I was then 244 for ages. It did not matter what I did. If I ate a ton, I was 244, if I ate nothing, I was 244. I tried the wheat belly diet for months, and when that didn't work I t even went down to 600 calories and had a very bad mental place with all of this for several months as well. In July or August I just said, forget this. I ate what I wanted (Which ended up being around 1600-2000 calories a day) and went to the gym and worked out at least 5 days a week.

About a month back the weight gain thing happened again. 4 pounds this time. It was out of nowhere and I was scared it was just going to keep going.

I have gone to see doctors about this. Most of them just look at me and shrug. They say, it is easy, eat less, move more. My tests come back normal…
I don't even know.

So what do you think? Why am I such a failure at this? How come other people can lose weight and I can't?

Replies

  • hwoeltjen
    hwoeltjen Posts: 199 Member
    You need to track your food intake. Here is what you do.

    1) Open your diary to the public.
    2) Log your food.

    I guarantee you that you are eating too much. The whole "I ate 600 calories a day" thing doesn't cut it. If the doc says there is nothing wrong with you then calories in vs calories out applies.

    It's not difficult. Log your food...eat under your maintenance and you will lose weight.
  • gigglesinthesun
    gigglesinthesun Posts: 860 Member
    my suggestion would be to keep a very accurate food diary for 2 months i.e. weighing everything, measuring only the liquids, itemised logging, double checking entries etc etc not at 1200 calories, but something where someone of your size should lose some weight (maybe a 1lbs a week)

    Weigh yourself regularly - I would say daily, not to get obsessed about it, but to establish a baseline and to see how your weight fluctuates within your cycle (I gain about 2 lbs during ovulation, then lose those, and then gain 3-4 lbs during my actual period, and then lose those, but overall the weight is slowly moving downwards)

    When you have those 2 months worth of data, go back to the doctor and ask to see a specialist. Doctors hear all these things every day, but unless you have the evidence to back it up, they are going to assume you are not telling the truth.

    Killing yourself at the gym isn't actually helpful, because whilst it is good for health it will throw out you calorie calculations unless you have a chest strap HRM to estimate the calories burnt, so that you eat the right amount of calories back and not some overinflated number.
  • littlepinkhearts
    littlepinkhearts Posts: 1,055 Member
    i agree with the above, open your diary, log your food, be consistent, be precise. Get a food scale and weigh your food. Stay at it vigorously and conciously for days, weeks and months and if you have any questions or things don't seem to be going well? Come back and ask more questions with your diary still open so we can help you out mid-track. Best of luck.
  • OK, I made it public. I was eating very clean for months, but I gave up.

    I have had a bad few days. I ate a wrap because I thought it would be "better" and I was off for instance. But my calories are still decent.

    My husband has lost 30lbs since May, and I just want to cry, because nothing is happening for me. We are both eating and doing the same things, though he is eating a heck of a lot more than me!
    I know I don't have the diary to back me up, but I followed the Wheat Belly diet for months and the scale did not budge. When I was down to like 600 calories I was losing hair by the handful. That is what freaked me out into eating again.
  • 2spamagnet
    2spamagnet Posts: 60 Member
    Agreed with the above responses. Good ideas. Log everything. There are calories in nearly everything, so be very diligent.

    Also - Cut more calories. Eating less always works. Don't go so far as 600 cal/day... Get a baseline of good logging of food/quantities, and you should find a balance where you start losing weight. It is possible to eat very little and still not lose fat. You need to force your body to use stored calories due to your eating less than your body needs. So long as you are above essential body fat levels (10% to 13% for women), your body will burn fat when you have not eaten enough during the day. For me, I know I am burning fat when I feel hungry 2 - 3 times during the day before meals (and then I wait a bit before the meal or snack).

    One sure way to start losing fat is to eat below your BMR. You can calculate your BMR here:
    http://www.bmi-calculator.net/bmr-calculator/

    Put in your stats, and check your BMR. This is the amount of calories your body needs if you do nothing all day but rest. You can add activity multipliers (20% up to 100%) depending on how active you are during the day (excluding exercise), but if you eat at your BMR or slightly below, and you have more than the minimum essential body fat amount (5% for men, 10% - 13% for women), your body will use stored fat to make up the calorie differences.

    3,500 calories = 1 lb of fat. If you have a daily deficit of 500 calories/day (equals 3,500 calories per week) under the amount of calories you burn, your body will convert 1 lb of stored fat into energy.

    If you eat below your BMR, don't go more than 250 cal/day below - that would put you at a 0.5 lb/week deficit, PLUS a deficit for not adding your activity multiplier (at least 20% of your BMR). For the first 2 - 4 weeks, try eating at your BMR and watch if your weight starts going down.

    If you go over today, try to go under tomorrow. Splurge for Thanksgiving (a little bit), then skip breakfast on Friday and eat a small lunch and dinner to try to balance your excess. Look at your weekly calorie intake graph (on a mobile device, I don't think it's online) and it will tell you how much you were over or under your goal for the week on Sunday. Always try to meet your goal at the end of the week, and don't stress if you go over one day.

    And calorie estimates are ESTIMATES. So if you are not losing weight and meeting your goals, then cut more. You will find a place where you will start to lose fat. Be patient and look at overall weight trends, not day to day fluctuations.

    Good luck! Don't get discouraged. You can do this!
  • gigglesinthesun
    gigglesinthesun Posts: 860 Member
    OK, I made it public. I was eating very clean for months, but I gave up.

    I have had a bad few days. I ate a wrap because I thought it would be "better" and I was off for instance. But my calories are still decent.

    My husband has lost 30lbs since May, and I just want to cry, because nothing is happening for me. We are both eating and doing the same things, though he is eating a heck of a lot more than me!
    I know I don't have the diary to back me up, but I followed the Wheat Belly diet for months and the scale did not budge. When I was down to like 600 calories I was losing hair by the handful. That is what freaked me out into eating again.

    if your hair was falling out then something was obviously wrong. Hair doesn't usually fall out right away when you are on a vlcd, most anorexics get the problem down the line, but that is after quite a while of not getting enough nutrients.

    I personally couldn't care less how you get your calories (google twinkie diet for further illustrations), but again if your hair was falling out something is not right.
  • 2spamagnet
    2spamagnet Posts: 60 Member
    And do eat back your exercise calories, or at least part of them. Just living you burn about 80 cal/hour (divide your BMR by 24 hours). So while you may burn 500 cal doing 60 min of exercise, really your additional calorie burn is more like 500 - 80 = 420 cal.

    If you are not feeling hungry after a cardio workout, push off your next meal or snack longer... It's okay.
  • I looked up the BMR thing, and it said I needed 1874 calories a day. I have my food log set to 1427, and I am doing a good job staying right around that. I am staying there even when it is telling me I earned extra calories from exercise. I know I have only been logging a few days, but this is how I HAVE been eating, I haven't changed it.

    I work out at least 5 times a week doing spinning, les Mills Pump, Les Mills Combat ect. Sometimes the gym computer says I burn 1000 calories! See why I am so very frustrated?!
  • littlelexical
    littlelexical Posts: 146 Member
    To me it sounds like PCOS or a thyroid issue - I would suggest telling all of this to your GP and asking them to run checks.

    Despite exercise and a great diet, people with these issues (especially thyroid issues) can gain weight as your thyroid directly influences how your body uses the food you give it.

    Hair Loss can be attricuted to these things - however, hairloss on a 600cal diet is not uncommon at all - and how quickly it happens depends on the individual - however - if it was no a 'nutritionally complete' 600cal diet - losing hair will start much quicker.

    I suggest seeing your GP before such extreme dieting again - if you do have a hormone issue, extreme dieting can be one of the WORST things you can do in the long run.
  • tbonethemighty
    tbonethemighty Posts: 100 Member
    Have a specialist check your thyroid. My mom has a similar problem, and for YEARS her tests came back normal and the dotors told her she was nuts because they were checking for irregularities in...can't remember exactly what. Finally one guy got smart and checked her level of antibodies, and hey, what do you know, they were all over the place (i.e., she had a major problem that wasn't showing up in her tests, but her body knew it).

    I totally agree that going to your docs with eight or so weeks of data in your hand is the best idea and defnitely the first thing you should do...but then when the doctor shrugs and goes, "Hm, I don't know, looks normal to me", push them to find out if there are other ways of doing the tests that might show up irregularities that they're missing the first time.
  • MyJourney1960
    MyJourney1960 Posts: 1,133 Member
    I do understand your frustration - especially since there is so much information out there ("eat carbs!", "don't eat carbs but eat fat!", "Eat fat but don't eat tomatoes!" etc), and you really don't know what to do.

    I've not been on here that long, about six months, but I can tell you that there is sound advice here on MFP. Just looking at the past few days i see a lot of eating out, which is a lot of sodium and fat. I don't know how much you are actually burning at the gym - those "gym computers" are not very accurate, neither are the MFP estimates. So it's a possibility that you are underestimating your intake and/or overestimating your exercise, which, combined with too much sodium could lead to you not losing/gaining.

    here's what you do:
    start today by weighing everything you eat. don't guess, don't 'sort of'. weigh everything.
    Log everything you eat.
    exercise is important but you are going to lose the weight in the kitchen so that is where your focus should be.
    try to eat real food that you make - fresh salads, fresh fruit, chicken etc.

    you can do this.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,023 Member
    Have you had hormones checked? You stated you saw doctors, but not indicated if tests were done.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • lesley964
    lesley964 Posts: 18 Member
    Had a look at your last few days, and I noticed too that your sodium levels are high, that could cause you to hold on to water. I was in a similar spot a couple of years back and it turned out I was ill.....didn't know this until I was in pain! now on meds for ulcer and IBS since getting that sorted and joining MFP and eating sensibly I have lost a lot....I believe mainly water from my poor swollen guts that were so inflamed and irritated. Go back to your doc as losing hair is not right....I did but that was due to my iron levels being almost zero with my ulcer.
  • MyJourney1960
    MyJourney1960 Posts: 1,133 Member
    OK, I made it public. I was eating very clean for months, but I gave up.

    I have had a bad few days. I ate a wrap because I thought it would be "better" and I was off for instance. But my calories are still decent.

    My husband has lost 30lbs since May, and I just want to cry, because nothing is happening for me. We are both eating and doing the same things, though he is eating a heck of a lot more than me!
    I know I don't have the diary to back me up, but I followed the Wheat Belly diet for months and the scale did not budge. When I was down to like 600 calories I was losing hair by the handful. That is what freaked me out into eating again.
    not sure what the wheat belly diet is, but wanted to clarify - when you say your hair was falling out, it was while you were eating 600 calories (and presumably not a very balanced diet)?
  • nlb1106
    nlb1106 Posts: 37 Member
    Are you weighing all your food? I noticed a HUGE difference in my portion sizes when I started weighing. What you think is a portion can quite easily be double what a portion should be, which means double the calories.
  • I don't know what tests were done. Doctors don't take me seriously, I do believe that. Even when I said, it was hard to lose weight before my daughter, but at least I could. If I go back and look at the results what would the hormones be under?

    I don't mean to eat out that much, but my problem is I am on the go all the time. My daughter is home schooled and so we are all over the place all week. I have decided that I have to stop this eating lunch at 3:30 thing. That can't be good. I need to figure out how to do that without eating out. I live in a very warm state, so even with a cooler I don't know if I would trust stuff in my car.

    I haven't been weighing my stuff this time, but I did in the past so I know roughly what a serving should be.

    In short the wheat belly died it no wheat. I did it as no wheat or gluten. When that didn't work I punished myself with the very low cal diet. Hey, I never said I had a good relationship with food.
  • littlelexical
    littlelexical Posts: 146 Member
    You need to persist until you find a Dr who will - even if it means going to a naturalist or an integrative practitioner - who doesn't look at masking symptoms, but fixing their cause. Your health is worth perusing & if you say a Dr doesn't take you seriously, then, it sounds like you know already it may be more than just your diet and exercise - Its worth finding one who will :)
  • MyJourney1960
    MyJourney1960 Posts: 1,133 Member
    I don't know what tests were done. Doctors don't take me seriously, I do believe that. Even when I said, it was hard to lose weight before my daughter, but at least I could. If I go back and look at the results what would the hormones be under?

    I don't mean to eat out that much, but my problem is I am on the go all the time. My daughter is home schooled and so we are all over the place all week. I have decided that I have to stop this eating lunch at 3:30 thing. That can't be good. I need to figure out how to do that without eating out. I live in a very warm state, so even with a cooler I don't know if I would trust stuff in my car.

    I haven't been weighing my stuff this time, but I did in the past so I know roughly what a serving should be.

    In short the wheat belly died it no wheat. I did it as no wheat or gluten. When that didn't work I punished myself with the very low cal diet. Hey, I never said I had a good relationship with food.
    there are a lot of reasons or excuses why you CAN'T lose weight. Believe me, btdt. But if you are serious about this, about yourself, then start taking this seriously. Give yourself one month- weigh all your foods, log consistently and honestly, stop with eating out two- three times a day, exercise, and see what happens. Measure yourself and take pictures before and after.if you have to be out all day the yes, use a cooler. Thousands of cab drivers, long haul drivers, teachers, construction workers, park rangers, cops, etc., do exactly that. You can take healthy sandwiches, big salad with a healthy protein, etc.
  • mmipanda
    mmipanda Posts: 351 Member
    some thoughts/suggestions

    6 ounces of chicken seems pretty tiny. That's like 1/2 a breast. You're certain that you're tracking accurately? It looks like you eat out a lot, and if you're not eating out then you're eating the same old thing at home. Its much easier to control what you eat if you're cooking more.

    TBH I find some entries hard to believe - two slices of a big cheese pizza has to be more than 340 cals. Americans pizzas are HUGE and I know that our much smaller serves are usually 200cals/slice. Anyway. I flicked through a bunch of entries and it was pretty much:

    breakfast - eggo waffle & chocolate almond milk

    lunch - either chicken & frozen veg or some kind of fast food

    dinner - either chicken & frozen veg or some kind of fast food

    Get some variety in there :(

    ALSO you seem to just use a bunch of 'homemade' recipes that are in the system. How do you know what they put into their recipe? Try entering individual ingredients or creating your own recipes. And maybe try to get a bit more creative in the kitchen. I'd be put off eggo waffles (whatever they are??) for life if I ate them every single day.
  • Have you considered the possibility that you might be sleep walking and heading for the fridge? You never know. But I guess you would have noticed food going missing. Just throwing it out there as a possibility.
  • clambert1273
    clambert1273 Posts: 840 Member
    I don't know what tests were done. Doctors don't take me seriously, I do believe that. Even when I said, it was hard to lose weight before my daughter, but at least I could. If I go back and look at the results what would the hormones be under?

    If they tested Thyroid it would be listed as TSH - some labs have different names for their tests but you should be able to pick them up fairly easily. My doctor blew me off for 13 years (he just kept saying I was hypothyroid and nothing else) but turns out I have Hashimoto's AND a rare subacute thyroiditis - go figure.

    However, you can still lose weight with it (I am currently now that it is controlled - somewhat)
    I don't mean to eat out that much, but my problem is I am on the go all the time. My daughter is home schooled and so we are all over the place all week. I have decided that I have to stop this eating lunch at 3:30 thing. That can't be good. I need to figure out how to do that without eating out. I live in a very warm state, so even with a cooler I don't know if I would trust stuff in my car.

    As someone who works over 10 hours per day, has 3 kids, 3 dogs, 2 cats and husband - it can be done. I weigh everything and pack my meals accordingly. Even during baseball/softball season (talk about on the go lol) I carry my cooler with me.. You just have to find out the easiest method for yourself. For me, I cook a bunch on Sunday and get it measured out for my week.
    I haven't been weighing my stuff this time, but I did in the past so I know roughly what a serving should be.

    That is a major problem. Doesn't take that long to weigh it in grams and get an accurate measurement. I know it isn't perfect but I feel pretty comfortable in my intake.

    As far as some radical diet - unless you have an intolerance, then don't deny anything just make it fit into your day. :)
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    I think you need to try again. Set yourself a reasonable goal of losing 1 lb a week, and weigh and log everything you eat. If you still haven't lost anything in 2 months, go see a specialist to have your thyroid and hormones checked.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    You should never be at 600 calories. I'm sure you realize that now.

    I agree with others. LOG every single bite that goes into your mouth, every single day.

    I've been in between 240-270 for almost my entire life - since about age 16-36. My weight spiked up to 307 once but came back down pretty easily with exercise and barely changing my diet. HOWEVER, it felt like no amount of exercising or trying to eat healthy would get my body below 260 in my thirties. It was VERY frustrating. ESPECIALLY when I started dating my now-husband and followed his healthy eating habits and saw very little improvement in my weight. Or when I stopped eating beef etc, and friends doing that lost 50+ lb quickly and I lost like 7 lb in 5 months with a MAJOR dietary change.

    I also remember in high school believing there was something really, really amiss with my health and/or metabolism as some weeks I would eat tons of fast food, cookies by the bag, etc, and weigh 237 and then eat salads and skip a few meals and weigh 241. I started to believe that for me it didn't matter if I ate healthy or not because I was still going to be fat and not lose weight normally. I believed that for years.

    But seriously...despite all of this, MFP worked for me. I have been doing it since March 25, 2013 and have lost EXACTLY 1.57 lb per week averaged out. Even though some weeks I didn't lose any weight or just 1 lb, it averages out to the 1.5 lb loss that MFP "claims" for me...I am a believer. Give it a shot and just do not give up!!
  • cathipa
    cathipa Posts: 2,991 Member
    Try to avoid processed food/restaurant food as much as possible. They contain a TON of sodium and will contribute to water retention. Try to eat more fruit and vegetables to increase your fiber intake. Hope this helps!
  • Tracking consistently for three months can help you identify patterns and their causes.
  • cici1028
    cici1028 Posts: 799 Member
    Hi there Ali! Definitely the food. If you're eating the correct portions and foods, the weight will come off with or without exercise. Calculate your BMR and TDEE (like the other posters are telling you to do!) and take 20% off your TDEE. You are probably not logging everything and if you are, you may not be honest with your portions. Track consistently and without judgment for two weeks. Every day. Everything you eat. Everything that goes in your mouth!! :) Then take a look back. You might be surprised.

    After that two weeks, if you start to 1) eat out less 2) watch your sugars 3) watch your sodium and stick to your calories and make sure your portions are accurate, you should see results.

    IF you don't after religiously weighing and logging your food and staying with your calories, then bring your food logs to your doctor. But based on your diary, I think you are seriously underestimating the calories in your food.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    OK, I made it public. I was eating very clean for months, but I gave up.

    I have had a bad few days. I ate a wrap because I thought it would be "better" and I was off for instance. But my calories are still decent.

    My husband has lost 30lbs since May, and I just want to cry, because nothing is happening for me. We are both eating and doing the same things, though he is eating a heck of a lot more than me!
    I know I don't have the diary to back me up, but I followed the Wheat Belly diet for months and the scale did not budge. When I was down to like 600 calories I was losing hair by the handful. That is what freaked me out into eating again.

    Eating clean means nothing. You can eat too much 'clean' food just as easy.

    Count.Calories. Log.Religiously. Weigh.Everything.Don't over estimate your exercise burn.
  • Hi there-log every single bite-and be patience with yourself-I myself lost a total of 94 pounds I wrote every thing down from day 1-it could be your hormones-when you track you can see a pattern- believe you can do it-I have been at 214 pounds so I know how that feels-so for me it was about keeping track-for me I did take 1-2 pounds aweek off-but everyone is different-I myself use to judge myself by the scale-so today I use portion control-and watch your sodium level-weigh your self same time of the day-and when you workout try different things-as your bosy gets use to same thing all the time- you may see a difference-good luck in your weight lose journey-I lost that 214 pound person-so remember you can do it- you are worth it-thanks for being so honest-hope this helps:)
  • I'd try bumping up your calories to like 2000 for a few weeks (ideally with some good protein like grilled chicken breast, lite tunafish, turkey, etc) and see if anything changes. If you're accurately logging, it seems like your calories are pretty low.

    Who knows though. Some people swear you can eat 500 calories a day and you'll lose weight and some people swear if you go below your BMR your body will go into starvation mode.

    But according to your logs I'd say you are pretty certainly on the too low side if anything.