Should I feel guilty?

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tyleeloo30
tyleeloo30 Posts: 67
in Motivation and Support
So last night was my brother's birthday party, and I had been eating fairly decently for about a week. I'm trying to lose about 5lbs, so its not like I have a huge goal to achieve. I started my day off well, had a bowl of cream of wheat for breakfast, granola as a mid morning snack, some grapes for lunch, a clementine and the rest of my grapes for a snack in the afternoon. I didnt feel very hungry at all, and I was eating completely healthy until... we went to pick up my brother's icecream cake and my mom bought me an icecream cone.... how could I say no? So I ate it. I figured, I've only eaten about 600calories so far today, and I've been doing well all week, so I can have it. Then unleashed the cravings. I also had a peanut butter cookie. I was content. Not hungry, not really full, happily in between. I could've eaten that all day and been fine. But... my mom made pizza. And her pizza is really, really, really good. So I had 2 slices. Then I had a freezie, offered to me by mom's neighbor, while he commented on how I've "been gaining weight". I was terrified, seriously. But he said he was just kidding (my mom swears he was kidding) and that if anything, I've lost weight and need to gain a bit because I'm so slim. Continuing on... just so happens that right about then I was craving chocolate. So I had 8 truffles. They were delicious. Then two fudge cookies, also delicious. And then a HUGE slice of oreo icecream cake from Dairy Queen. And I'm not kidding when I say huge.
So, question, should I feel guilty? I know that is a ton of food... but at the same time people are telling me I'm really skinny and need to gain weight. I dont know what to believe anymore because I really want to lose 5lbs, but in the midst of delicious food, in reality its only 5lbs. Do I really need to lose it? People say I look incredibly slim... but I still feel a little chubby and would love to lose a bit. I dont even know what I'm asking in this forum anymore, lol.
Just wondering if I should feel guilty, and how should I move on from this? Should I restrict? I probably went over my maintenance by about 1000 calories....

Replies

  • agcarden1
    agcarden1 Posts: 35 Member
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    Guilt accomplishes nothing, except for beating yourself up. Okay, so you had an off day of indulging in your cravings. The fact that you did feel the need to over-indulge may mean that you are being too restrictive to begin with, and are not giving your body all of the nutrients that it needs. Dust yourself off, pick yourself up, and start fresh today. There is nothing you can do to change the past, and worrying about it gets you nowhere.

    Oh, and that comment from the neighbor- ugh!! Why do people even joke about that?! But seriously, if everyone is telling you that you need to gain more weight, why do you feel that you have to lose more? Honestly, from your profile picture, you are beautiful and you do not look like you need to lose any weight. Perhaps you would feel better about yourself if you just focused on muscle toning instead of losing?
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    That's a bizarre question. How could we ever tell you to feel guilty or not? Guilt is an internal emotion; do you want us to shame you?

    If it were me, I *wouldn't* feel guilty, because I'd understand it's one day. When I used to feel guilty about anything with food, I developed and dealt with (and still deal with) anorexia. It seems like anytime a negative emotion starts getting attached to food, it's either camouflaging a deeper issue or creating a new one.

    If you feel unhappy with your body, perhaps talk to someone? You may not be seeing what everyone else is commenting on (you being very slim).

    I'd also recommend some form of strength training (weights, body weight, etc.). Like you, I was very skinny for a long time, but never saw myself as anything other than chubby. Lifting weights has helped my body composition have more LBM, which results in a stronger, firmer, smaller physique.

    It makes me feel great, too, and lets me eat more without... guess what it is?... guilt.
  • tyleeloo30
    tyleeloo30 Posts: 67
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    Thanks for your replies :) I love the suggestion of talking to someone about my body, because I do think that often we are too negative on ourselves. The problem is, everyone sees me with all my winter clothes on, so they don't truly see what I see when I'm getting dressed, or wearing a bikini, etc. Thats mainly why I want to lose the 5lbs, just so I can feel better about myself without being covered in layers of clothes. Although lifting weights may also help firm some areas so I can get that self confidence.
    agcarden1- thanks for your kind words :) I'm very self conscious and the neighbors comment did hit a sensitive spot...

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