Pity party

idivadi
idivadi Posts: 222 Member
edited September 22 in Motivation and Support
I threw myself a""pity party"" today. As usual-- at this pity feast I was alone. I finished my four 12hr night shifts and on the way home allowed myself to indulge in the POOR MES. I stopped at the corner store and picked up my drug of choice---potato chips. A large bag---the 235g bag... I came home went to bed with my potato chips and ate the whole works. I slept for about three hours(drugged stupor) do you suppose? Got up and of course felt just awful. So to make myself feel better I put a large tray of fries in the oven, opened a can of gravey for them and shredded some cheese. Poutine was the plan-- I ate a large plate full and slept for another two hours.
What a carb of a day!!! It is now about six hours later and of course the regret has set in.
Does this senerio sound familiar to anyone or am I as desperate as the above sounds. I really had no reason for the pity party--I am healthy and able to work, I a wonderful family and friends. When I am tired - I seem to be able to get to that awful place where I allow myself to wallow in carbs. I never feel better when a few hours of sanity have returned. I am hoping that by actually writing this down and putting in out to the cosmos...I can not only say what I do but see it and change the behavior. I have filled out my food lists for the day-- I have not hidden calories. In the past I woud just say I had not had much to eat today--if asked. I lhad lots to eat today and tomorrow will make better choices. I willl make this change this time. No more excuses!!!!

Replies

  • chica45
    chica45 Posts: 3
    I am happy that you vented. Move on and give yourself a kiss for being honest.
  • aunienue
    aunienue Posts: 416
    Poutine?!? You must be Canadian :smile: I love poutine:bigsmile:
  • idivadi
    idivadi Posts: 222 Member
    Thanx==thats exact;y what I was trying to do-- thank you for listening. I am wiping the tears and moving on with my journey.
  • anewattitude
    anewattitude Posts: 483 Member
    I'm sure most of us can relate.. at least I know I can because chips have been my go-to food. The good news is today is another day and even though you can't undo the carb fest at least you realize it didn't turn out to be the comfort you were seeking and so now you can move forward!

    Thanks for sharing.

    best of luck
  • idivadi
    idivadi Posts: 222 Member
    Yes Canadian and poutine loving lol
  • kolambert
    kolambert Posts: 1
    it happens to everyone, especially when they are hungry and tired. i know that is the same kind of thing my mom would go through (she worked the night shift at a bakery so she was finishing work right when we were getting up for school). one thing that worked for her was preparing food that was easy to cook or reheat when she wasnt tired. that way it wouldnt take much more time to have a healthy meal instead of carb overload when she was done with her shift.
  • watkinsc
    watkinsc Posts: 177 Member
    Wow! That story is so familiar. When I worked 12 hour nights I would be just exhausted. It was worse than being drunk as far as will power and decision making went. I used to eat so much crap before I went to sleep. I tried carrying a note in my pocket that simply said "DON'T DO IT". It worked sometimes. Good luck dear, and don't beat yourself up too hard. Days like this happen.
  • idivadi
    idivadi Posts: 222 Member
    I appreciate your comment and knowing that others can relate to my foods and feeling is a nice thing. I feel supported on this site in a way that other big name weight loss groups never provided. Here I feel understood, supported and accountable.
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
    Not sure why you went there... I think we all do sometimes. The good thing is- you are being accountable. You logged the calories in. You actually KNOW how much the carbs are 'worth'. Hopefully next time you get the urge to go 'carbwild' :ohwell: you can reflect back on today's log and then have the the strength to say 'no, I wont go there today'. If not, log them again. One day you WILL have the strength. It's all about baby steps and getting there. We each have our own place. You will find yours. Good luck!

    I admire you for taking the steps to post your experience and to be honest. And hey, if you can't vent here... :bigsmile:

    Have a good evening, sleep well and start fresh tomorrow. :flowerforyou:
  • fitnesspirateninja
    fitnesspirateninja Posts: 667 Member
    I have totally been there. I love carbs. And I beat myself up when I screw up...but there's no need to do that! We're human beings, we're going to have bad days.
  • tracy39
    tracy39 Posts: 7
    The best thing you can do for yourself is not give up. We all have those days and you need to say tomorrow is another day. Remember one day at a time. You can do it!:flowerforyou:
  • tjradd73
    tjradd73 Posts: 3,495 Member
    i think that everyone can relate to this in their own way! i know i can...it is sooo hard working nights...not to grab some chips or fast food or ice cream or whatever you think you need on the way home especially when you've had a bad day!! just put your blinders on in the morning, get home, grab a nice relaxing cup of tea, and get straight to bed!! you will get past this habit sooner rather than later! good luck!
  • kdsmith
    kdsmith Posts: 250
    Try mentally preparing yourself for the next time you are that exhausted...have a plan and think about it and see yourself doing it and rehearse it in your mind every day! I use this when I am going to a party or family function that involves lots of yummy foods...I think about how I am going to have a snack before hand and then decide what I am going to allow myself at the party and then I think about how good I will feel when I accomplish my goal. I think I "failed" my vision about 4 times before it actually worked for me and then I was so happy!!!

    I also find that instead of thinking in terms of negatives..."I will feel terrible if I eat a huge bag of chips" I try to think more positively..."I am going to feel so happy when I go to bed after eating a healthy bowl of cereal and some fruit".

    I'm glad that you have the right attitude and are going to start fresh tomorrow, that is strength!!!
  • jbug100
    jbug100 Posts: 406 Member
    I totally relate. I do 12 hou nights also, and many times the following day is a carb disaster. I'm getting better though. Hang in there.
  • LindaSueBakk
    LindaSueBakk Posts: 145 Member
    Been there, done that but my choice of miserable eating is sweets, esp. chocolate. This site has helped me make a lot more good choices and now I have a lot more good days than bad ones. Welcome to MFP, I really think it will help you! If you need more friends accept my request..
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