postpartum frustration... ouch

bge1009
bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
I am feeling super discouraged. I have had 2 kids via c section so I lost almost all my abdominal muscles. I weigh 223 at 5'7" I feel awful about myself. I have tried getting motivated and have done okay between 30 and 60mins a day of exercise but it is super painful. Will it ever get better. And I constantly feel hungry I am not sure if that is due to breastfeeding or not. I am trying to make sure I eat enough for her but I am getting really frustrated. I am persistent so I wont give up but I don't feel like My body should feel so fatigued after 15 minutes. Any suggestions for food or healthy snacks, how I can account for nursing but not feel starving. Any reasonable suggestion actually.:ohwell:
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Replies

  • Jesea
    Jesea Posts: 376 Member
    My boys are 9 and 4, and the only advice I have is, "give yourself a break"! When I was nursing, I was exhausted and irritable and easily upset and frustrated. It may take longer to lose weight and tone your muscles, but you'll get there! I think breastfeeding burns about 300 calories a day, so just make sure you're eating enough, make the healthiest choices you can, exercise when you can (both my boys loved being in a carrier for walks, and my oldest loved the jogging stroller), and get as much rest as you can...

    :)
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    Thanks. I am trying to not be so hard on myself. Chocolate and salt cravings are taking over my dreams. lol
  • beattie1
    beattie1 Posts: 1,012 Member
    How old is your baby? The number of calories she takes will increase as she grows, then decrease as she is weaned. I agree that around 300 calories is a figure often given. Have a look in the food database - if you put in "breastfeeding" there are a lot of entries. Pick the one that matches your situation as best you can and it will give you a "negative calorie" amount to add to each day.

    Were you given exercises to do after your c-section? They'd be a good place to start, then you could add in Pilates-style abdominal exercises.
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    How old is your baby? The number of calories she takes will increase as she grows, then decrease as she is weaned. I agree that around 300 calories is a figure often given. Have a look in the food database - if you put in "breastfeeding" there are a lot of entries. Pick the one that matches your situation as best you can and it will give you a "negative calorie" amount to add to each day.

    Were you given exercises to do after your c-section? They'd be a good place to start, then you could add in Pilates-style abdominal exercises.

    I have an almost 4 year old and an almost 4 month old. They did not give me any exercises to do I wish they had. I am alternating Pilates and yoga also walking/jogging and bikeing. I feel like I need to lose weight before I can do anything though. This time of year is hard for me to so anything due to bad asthma I get really tired really quick.
  • MelissaPhippsFeagins
    MelissaPhippsFeagins Posts: 8,063 Member
    How long ago was your second section? It can take longer for the second incision to heal, according to several friends who've had more than one. I was blessed to have all of my four naturally - not even an epidural. But it's hard to get your body back either way. I say give yourself a break, eat healthy, push the kiddos around in a stroller and don't worry about much else for a while. A newborn is enough.




    ETA: Get yourself some Lindt or Godiva truffles and plan one into every day. If you need chocolate to get through the postpartum period, then plan for it and have it. Chocolate is not evil. It may in fact be one of the best things God created: antioxidants, feel good hormones and great taste in one little package.
  • betrishy
    betrishy Posts: 52 Member
    I also have had 2 C sections, just give yourself sometime to bounce back. Even after five years my abdominal muscles are not the same as they were before children, but I am thinner now than ever before. I would like a mini tummy tuck. I would do portion control, drink lots of water to keep your milk supply up and walk! I love walking, get a double jogging stroller, I had a 6 month old and a 3 year old in mine. The weight will come off if you eat less and burn more.
  • betrishy
    betrishy Posts: 52 Member
    I have a piece of chocolate everyday!!! I plan those 150 calories, but only dark chocolate 70% or higher:)
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    I also have had 2 C sections, just give yourself sometime to bounce back. Even after five years my abdominal muscles are not the same as they were before children, but I am thinner now than ever before. I would like a mini tummy tuck. I would do portion control, drink lots of water to keep your milk supply up and walk! I love walking, get a double jogging stroller, I had a 6 month old and a 3 year old in mine. The weight will come off if you eat less and burn more.

    I got a little giggle at this... my 3 year old would never sit in a stroller. I am super jealous he is so high energy he would probably unscrew it while he was in it. I am trying the portion control that seems to be the hardest part for me.
  • umekanzah
    umekanzah Posts: 94 Member
    Even though both my kids were born vaginally, i can feel your frustration. Please give your body time to heal. Your little one is still so young. At this point with my kids, i was always tired and cranky due to lack of sleep. If i were you, i would take it easy on the workout. Try to take walks with your kids. If its too cold where you are, go for a walk in the mall. Its free and warm, lol. Try to watch what you eat but dont cut your calories too drastically. Just make sensible choices. And dont forget to drink your water. Good luc, you can do this but the key is to take it slow and listen to your body first.
  • krystina_letitia9
    krystina_letitia9 Posts: 697 Member
    I don't have any kids yet (one on the way in April) so this could be way off the mark but is anemia a possibility? I've heard through the grapevine young kids make you tired but just something else to think about :happy:
  • ciccanti38
    ciccanti38 Posts: 37 Member
    Hello, I have also had 2 c sections...Don't give up! 4 months is definitely not enough time for your stomach muscles to heal. It has taken me almost a yr until I really started to work on my stomach. If you push to hard too quickly, you can actually do more damage to the tissue. It has been almost 2 1/2 yrs now of consistency and good nutrition and my stomach is now looking amazing! I never thought that it would be possible considering that I had 2 c sections! So there is hope! Also I would like to invite you to my private Facebook group. It is a great place to seek encouragement & support to stay motivated. I will also be having group challenges after the Holidays which will require you to check in daily. Although, they will be optional. Does this seem like something that you may be interested in? The group name is "Fit and Healthy Minds" I would love for you to join us! Anyone else is also welcomed!
  • Seesawboomerang
    Seesawboomerang Posts: 296 Member
    While I was breastfeeding after c-section I had a constant supply of dried apricots, almonds, mixed seeds, and a bottle of water on the go. I wasn't watching my weight back then but it did help to have the healthy stuff to hand at all times (night and day!).

    Don't be hard on yourself, early days (months, years) are so exhausting so do whatever you need to keep well rested and nourished.

    ETA you can mix some chocolate pieces (chips, buttons, chunks, whatever) in with the fruit and nut mixture and it will help satisfy those cravings too.
  • Mangopickle
    Mangopickle Posts: 1,509 Member
    I began walking 5k's every weekend with the stroller brigade-every 5k has one. Just get in back with the walkers and other strollers. You get loads of positive energy and support from the other athletes. You are also doing charity work and you get a nice healthy snack at the end along with your t-shirt. All before most people wake up on saturday. I always took a photo of me with my daughter. I went from a size 18 to a size 10 in 1yr. The positive effect grew beyond me as my daughter left the stroller and began to run in fun runs, then walk 5k's. Her school began to have cross country down to kindergarten due to parent demand. That led to kid triathlons and duathlons. Now my kid is NOT some great athletic talent...and likely won't be. But she has learned that healthy eating and exercise are mandatory no matter what your wt is. Also check your labs, low vit d, anemia, and hypothyroidism will scuttle wt loss. Avoid simple carbs like the plague and get your good fats in. That's what worked for me, good luck!
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    I also have had 2 C sections, just give yourself sometime to bounce back. Even after five years my abdominal muscles are not the same as they were before children, but I am thinner now than ever before. I would like a mini tummy tuck. I would do portion control, drink lots of water to keep your milk supply up and walk! I love walking, get a double jogging stroller, I had a 6 month old and a 3 year old in mine. The weight will come off if you eat less and burn more.

    I got a little giggle at this... my 3 year old would never sit in a stroller. I am super jealous he is so high energy he would probably unscrew it while he was in it. I am trying the portion control that seems to be the hardest part for me.

    Lol me too. My daughter is 2.5 now and hasn't sat in a stroller for a while, and my son barely used his stroller after about 20 months. They keep me on my toes that's for sure!

    I've had 2 children and am currently 21 weeks pregnant with my 3rd. I was very lucky to have easy vaginal births with no stitches after (childbearing hips lol) and I started back exercising when each of my kids was 7 weeks old.

    I put on a tonne of weight with my daughter - when she was 8 weeks old and I dared to step on the scales I weighed 220 and I'm 5'6.

    I had a nightmare feeding her, and was doing a combination of breastfeeding, pumping, and formula feeding. My son was 22 months old when she was born, so that made it harder.

    I found porridge (oatmeal) was a good breakfast and it's supposed to help increase milk supply too, plus it's filling. You could snack on nuts and raisins and things. I get a Graze box delivered which has healthy snacks, but I don't know if you have those in the US. I also like rice cakes with peanut butter, or apple with peanut butter.

    The lactation consultant I saw said to have some dark chocolate every day as that helps with breastfeeding. Not sure if it's true, but it's a good excuse to get myself some next April :smile:

    For exercise you could just go for walks, take your kids to the park, soft play etc. I used to take mine out every day when my daughter was a baby, because staying at home was boring for my son.
  • ElizabethFuller
    ElizabethFuller Posts: 352 Member
    Please don't be hard on yourself! :flowerforyou:
    I had two babies but no C-section, I breast fed both of them, one for 6 months the other for 12 months. All the time I was breast feeding I was starving! I lost weight during both my pregnancies, then put it back on while nursing. This is not the time to be exercising hard, take it easy, drink plenty of water and let your body recover. In a few months you'll feel stronger and will be in a better position to attack an exercise programme. Don't let photos of new Mums in bikinis depress you, photoshop has a lot to answer for!
    Good luck and enjoy your family - they're not babies for long.
  • deanna418
    deanna418 Posts: 103 Member
    I didn't have a c section with either of my boys but with my youngest I didn't lose any weight after I delivered. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism a year and half after my son was born and my doc put me on synthroid. I lost about 10-18lbs in a year but then last December I got back on here and started working out. It sucks and I know how you feel but it takes time unfortunately. Good luck!
  • tashiaberman
    tashiaberman Posts: 48 Member
    Are you still taking your maternity multivitamin? You should probably make sure too that you're not iron deficient. This can cause a lot of tiredness.

    After having my last child I thought I had developed asthma. I had never had breathing difficulties before and it came on gradually about 2 weeks after the baby was born. I had retained so much water weight, so much more than with my other two children. I was exhausted all the time and couldn't even walk out to get the mail and back without being winded and exhausted. My legs felt like they weighed 100 lbs each.

    When I tried to speak to the doctors about it, they blew me off as a "hysterical new mom" and told me it would get better in a month or so. A week later it got so bad I could hardly breath whether sitting up or lying down and went to the emergency room. I had post-partum cardiomyopathy, a relatively rare, but not unheard of heart condition. It was very treatable and I recovered from it with medication and rest over the period of about a year.

    If your body is telling you something and the doctors will not listen, listen to your body and find another doctor. In the meantime, if these symptoms don't sound like you, don't worry. Give yourself some time to recover from having the baby (6 months) and in the meantime eat a normal diet for your baby, walk to exercise, pushing the stroller and pour on the diet/exercise later.

    I had no luck at all with any of the diets on this site, after years have finally found one that works. I am doing the Somersize diet, from Suzanne Somer's books and it is working for me. I don't have a lot of time to exercise, but this works with what I am able to do. I have lost 8 lbs in 2 weeks and plan to continue forever. It is a healthy diet full of good nutritious home-cooked recipes and I love it.
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
    How old is your baby? The number of calories she takes will increase as she grows, then decrease as she is weaned. I agree that around 300 calories is a figure often given. Have a look in the food database - if you put in "breastfeeding" there are a lot of entries. Pick the one that matches your situation as best you can and it will give you a "negative calorie" amount to add to each day.

    Were you given exercises to do after your c-section? They'd be a good place to start, then you could add in Pilates-style abdominal exercises.

    I have an almost 4 year old and an almost 4 month old. They did not give me any exercises to do I wish they had. I am alternating Pilates and yoga also walking/jogging and bikeing. I feel like I need to lose weight before I can do anything though. This time of year is hard for me to so anything due to bad asthma I get really tired really quick.

    I would start taking a good B complex supplement to help with energy. Talk to your doctor about getting your asthma symptoms under control.

    I had very bad asthma a few years ago. I spent 4-6 months in a bad bronchitis/asthma flare cycle. Like bad enough that I was on antibiotics and steroids for 10 days of every month...one month I was on them for 20 days straight! At one point my doctor had me on advair, singulair, an albuterol inhaler AND I had albuterol for a neb for crisis situations. For the last 8 months, I have been able to do just fine with just the albuterol inhaler before workouts.
  • codycsweet
    codycsweet Posts: 1,019 Member
    Give yourself time. I have a 14 month old 3 & 6 yr old aNd after the last on I was like a bottomless pit for almost 4 months I nursed for 7 months I didn't make the best eating choices so I gained weight during this time and no exercise. And my eating of sweets junk etc was not in moderation. I have now learned I can eat anything I just need to plan for it and eat in moderation.. Just make sure what you are eating s healthy stuff with just a little unhealthy when you want it. I had all three via csection Enjoy your baby let your body heal and as you get more energy then workout. Or just go for walks I did this with my last one all summer and loved it. However it's way to cold right now for me to do that. I did get on track with eating and exercise when he started sleeping through the night and I wasn't so tired. Good luck to you.
  • jamiesillimandunn
    jamiesillimandunn Posts: 270 Member
    I haven't had a csection but have had three natural births ...and even vaginaly it takes your body a whole year to recover from a full term pregnancy ...so I can imagine after a csection you can expect that plus some....I would suggest light excercise , if your abdomin is painful try sitting and using some weights , things that are low impact , yoga is wonderful for all strength , balance and flexibilty and does burn calories :) sounds like your being aweful hard on yourself ...four months your body is still freshly recovering ...so take it slow , you don't want to cause an incisional hernia , so be careful ......wish I had more advice
  • Lleldiranne
    Lleldiranne Posts: 5,516 Member
    First, if you're still having incision site pain 4 months later, you should talk to your doctor! (Maybe I'm misunderstanding and it's just general exercise discomfort?)

    An exclusively breastfeeding 4 month old probably requires about 500 extra calories a day. You can add it in as a food (It shows as negative calories so it gives you more). Also, unless you have a lot of weight to lose (sorry, I didn't see your goals) you probably should be set at no more than 1 pound per week loss. If you're truly feeling hungry all the time, you need to eat more.

    As far as exercise, I would suggest start slowly, especially if you weren't doing much before your pregnancy. Walking is a great start. Pay attention to your posture, make sure you are standing upright with your shoulders back and your tummy tucked. Another good starting exercise is to lie on the floor on your back and practice tightening your abs (think of pushing your belly button to your spine and flattening your lower back onto the floor.) If your doctor mentioned you have separated the abdominal muscles (it can happen with any pregnancy, not just c-section - there's a name for the condition but I don't remember it :ohwell:) you'll need to make sure you're clear for abdominal exercise before you do anything. Otherwise, just start with what you can do, and gradually increase.
  • lilred806
    lilred806 Posts: 195 Member
    I had 2 c-sections. Both my boys were breech. Neither would ask for directions :) anyway my second c-section had more scar tissue and I took longer to heal. I avoided crunches and ab exercises like that for a while. I could do planks though so I started there. I kept turkey breast around to snack on and carrots with hummus. I like the Lindt dark chocolate bars 85% because they curb my chocolate cravings. I breast fed both my boys to around 13 months old. With both of them I gained 40lbs while pregnant. I lost about 20lbs the first month and then the rest slowly came off. With my second I joined Mfp and used 500 calories for breast feeding . I counted it as exercise for 1 minute and put it in daily. As I lost weight Mfp would slowly decrease the calories automatically because an exercise would in theory burn less if I weigh less. I think it worked pretty well. Protein always helps me feel fuller. I also began a vitamin d supplement. As my sleep improved so did my energy. I was lower than my start weight when I quit breast feeding. Unfortunately around the time I quit breast feeding I got depressed and began eating everything and gained back 20 lbs so here I am losing 1 lb a week to get rid of it all plus some more. Good luck. Oh and finding a gym with childcare was extremely important for my weight loss.
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    It could be possible. I should have them check iron levels also potassium has been a huge issue for me.
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    Hello, I have also had 2 c sections...Don't give up! 4 months is definitely not enough time for your stomach muscles to heal. It has taken me almost a yr until I really started to work on my stomach. If you push to hard too quickly, you can actually do more damage to the tissue. It has been almost 2 1/2 yrs now of consistency and good nutrition and my stomach is now looking amazing! I never thought that it would be possible considering that I had 2 c sections! So there is hope! Also I would like to invite you to my private Facebook group. It is a great place to seek encouragement & support to stay motivated. I will also be having group challenges after the Holidays which will require you to check in daily. Although, they will be optional. Does this seem like something that you may be interested in? The group name is "Fit and Healthy Minds" I would love for you to join us! Anyone else is also welcomed!

    I will look for it. Thanks :-)
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    While I was breastfeeding after c-section I had a constant supply of dried apricots, almonds, mixed seeds, and a bottle of water on the go. I wasn't watching my weight back then but it did help to have the healthy stuff to hand at all times (night and day!).

    Don't be hard on yourself, early days (months, years) are so exhausting so do whatever you need to keep well rested and nourished.

    ETA you can mix some chocolate pieces (chips, buttons, chunks, whatever) in with the fruit and nut mixture and it will help satisfy those cravings too.

    Thats a great idea. Thanks!
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    I began walking 5k's every weekend with the stroller brigade-every 5k has one. Just get in back with the walkers and other strollers. You get loads of positive energy and support from the other athletes. You are also doing charity work and you get a nice healthy snack at the end along with your t-shirt. All before most people wake up on saturday. I always took a photo of me with my daughter. I went from a size 18 to a size 10 in 1yr. The positive effect grew beyond me as my daughter left the stroller and began to run in fun runs, then walk 5k's. Her school began to have cross country down to kindergarten due to parent demand. That led to kid triathlons and duathlons. Now my kid is NOT some great athletic talent...and likely won't be. But she has learned that healthy eating and exercise are mandatory no matter what your wt is. Also check your labs, low vit d, anemia, and hypothyroidism will scuttle wt loss. Avoid simple carbs like the plague and get your good fats in. That's what worked for me, good luck!

    Thanks.. one of my goals was to do a 5k in april, the color run.
  • ElizabethFuller
    ElizabethFuller Posts: 352 Member
    I had 2 c-sections. Both my boys were breech. Neither would ask for directions :)

    That would be the Y chromosome at work, typical blokes!
  • nancybuss
    nancybuss Posts: 1,461 Member
    Your baby is still Little. You may want to ask the doc why it hurts so much. Mine hurt for a bit but not where I felt like everything "Hurt" you have time!!!! my gut is finally getting pretty good. Its not a 6 pack but I think it looks pretty good for 48 and two c-sections in my 40's. There's still an inch that 'hangs' at that spot. I'm not 20, I can only do the best that I can and still take care of my kids.
  • metaphoria
    metaphoria Posts: 1,432 Member
    I had a c-section and then a v-bac, my kids are 5 and 3, and I still get the occasional twinge or full on soreness at the c section incision. It becomes a part of life.

    Take it easy on yourself, get used to life with two kids, get into a routine. And try for a walk every day or every other day with the kids or by yourself. Friends or family can hang out with one or both for an hour. Set a time of day for a small treat so you can limit the cravings by telling yourself it's not time, yet.
  • bge1009
    bge1009 Posts: 11 Member
    I had a c-section and then a v-bac, my kids are 5 and 3, and I still get the occasional twinge or full on soreness at the c section incision. It becomes a part of life.

    Take it easy on yourself, get used to life with two kids, get into a routine. And try for a walk every day or every other day with the kids or by yourself. Friends or family can hang out with one or both for an hour. Set a time of day for a small treat so you can limit the cravings by telling yourself it's not time, yet.

    I tried for a vbac.. but my little girl was 9lbs 8oz and 48 hours of back labor and 4 pushing was hell. It isnt so much incision pain its muscle pain... not even in my tummy.