Really having trouble with food
Replies
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First of all, congratulations on working all those hours plus looking at a Master's. Those are great accomplishments and goals.
It's hard to balance everything in your situation. I'm am older person who works plus went back to college, and while I love taking classes, I've found I really have to plan ahead what I'm going to eat or I will grab whatever is around. I take time 1-2 nights a week to make meals. I cook a big pot of steel cut oats and then heat some up in the morning with a sliced apple instead of sugar. I eat a lot of spiced lentils, stir fried veggies, steamed greens, and winter squash, so I cook those ahead of time and always have 1-2 meals in the fridge I can just heat up. I pack my lunch and take fruit for snacks.
I took a quick look at your diary. It looks like you are eating a lot of prepared foods with lots of sodium and possibly corn syrup/hidden sugar. Those two things will give you cravings.
I've found that filling up on steamed greens and other vegetables is a low cal way to curb my hunger. Soup is good, too, and doesn't have a lot of calories.
I've also found that I need to build on my motivation. Just knowing the reasons why I want to be healthier isn't enough. For example, when I need inspiration, this amazing true story lifts my spirits every time:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu4480 -
I think the winter months are harder. Something about the bear instinct, storing fat reserves for hibernation, etc.
I exercise so I can eat more. I used to think that was weird.
Food is extraordinarily powerful. You're not alone. I remember my Dad saying that even though he had given up cigarettes 20 years ago and hadn't touched one since, he sometimes still felt like sucking on one a mile long for an hour without stopping.
Yeah, it's like that.
The only difference is, we need food to survive. We don't need cigarettes. Keeping 'trigger' foods out of the house is fine while you are losing weight, but what about maintenance? At some point, we all need to learn to simply choose to not eat certain things at certain times. This is not something that a true addict can do (according to most addiction models).0 -
Silly question I know but do you take a multivitamin? I noticed a week or so when I started counting calories that I kept feeling like I needed more. With the restrictions I was missing things I had in abundance before. I added a multivitamin and it helped massively. I also cut down on simple carbs like bread, rice and white pasta and increased my proteins because I would have cravings at night when I had carbs for my snacks or a lot at dinner. These things helped me a lot, maybe they can help you too.0
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Read Eating Less by Gillian Riley. It's a great book on the psychology of eating.
Please don't take this the wrong way but have you ever been involved in playing the ' but ......' Game on a course or anything. It seems like often when people give you a suggestion, you say but,,,,,,, and give a reason why you can't do it. Try instead to twist it round and give a solution as to how you COULD do it.
As someone said to me- 'losing weight is hard, being over weight is hard- you need to just choose your hard.'0 -
I'm having food issues too-I work in convience store so all right there for me....all the time.....biggest weakness and always in my face is reese cups!!!! Also we all know not the best choices every night for dinner. try to take my dinner and that's not always the best choice either....I know my eating habits are the worst!!! Any suggestions?? I do use MFP and exercise. looking to lose total of 60 pds but would love to lose 30 by march 2014.0
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I also looked at your diary. Your ticker looks like you'd like to lose 60+ lbs? What are your stats? I think 1400 cals may be too aggressive for you and the restriction is causing issues. Do you have a food scale? Are you weighing and measuring everything? Looks like there are a lot of estimations on there (McD side salad with what looks like a homecooked meal). Weigh EVERYTHING and write it all down - even ketchup. This doesn't take willpower - just don't be lazy. What is your free time like? Looks like you could benefit from some light exercise. And, I know you have time. If I have time, you have time. You just need to make yourself and your health a priority in your life. You don't want it bad enough.
I use a scale often, but not all times. And No, I DO NOT always have time to exercise. I work 20-30 hours a week in a hospital that is an hour from where I live. I also work full time nearby where I live. Please don't say things like that "I don't want it bad enough" or tell me I'm "lazy". NOT APPRECIATED. I work MANY hours per week. Minimum of 60, not including drive time... max of 90 hours.
Also, I don't count exercise because I use a fitbit, and somedays I CANNOT get up to my step goal because I'm chained to a desk in an ER. When I go to the gym and do things, or when I do a kettlebell workout, it doesn't decrease my calories so why add it on here? I keep track of it in a calendar. I'm VERY strong. My bodyfat percentage does not match up with my bmi. If I kept all my muscle mass, but lost all body fat I would still weigh over 140 lbs, where some women at my height can weigh 135 lbs. I CAN'T.
Also, my boyfriend is a manager at McDonalds. So yes, sometimes I will put a mcdonalds side salad down because HE is making it based on the specifications from where he works. I don't use anywhere close to the amount of dressing the salad stipulates though. So I decrease the side by an estimation. Clearly, I know HOW to count. I just don't quite know HOW to keep my counts down to 1400 lately, which is what MFP put me at. I didn't choose the number.
If it's so easy for you, MISS, then why the hell are you on here? Don't need "tough love". Need some tips. Some support.
Ok, first things first. When I first responded I gave you some tips. You said, "yeah, doesn't work" I just eat it out if the freezer, I can't say no, etc. so, at that point it is just sheer willpower. A lot of time passes for you to think about eating something when you have to go to the kitchen, get it out if the freezer and heat it up. If losing weight was truly important to you then you would find the will to say no. No one will say no for you. And I didn't call you lazy. I said not logging accurately is laziness because that doesn't take willpower. Using a scale and logging accurately are TIPS to successful weight loss. I suggested more exercise because that will give you more calories to use. I asked your stats because perhaps, with a fitbit, tdee would be a better method for you. I have a full time job, two kids, a commute too, and a husband. I had all of that and an ailing mother and I still found time to exercise when recovering from knee surgery. It's called 4:30am. I'm not special which is why I know everyone can do it. I am on here because I had to lose baby weight and I learn a lot from other members about fitness and nutrition. I am sorry if it sounded snotty but the truth is the truth.0 -
It sounds like stress from work to me. When I'm tired, exhausted or frustrated from work I tend to overeat or defy my eating plan even though I know it hurts me in the end. Try forcing yourself to only bring healthy snacks to work. What I've been doing is buying lots of different teas to fill me up and to enjoy after dinner to mark the end of a meal, without adding calories to my daily intake. Additionally, if tea is too boring, you can always add a little bit of soy/almond/rice milk or similar creamer and a tiny bit of sweetener to boost its flavor. Sometimes it's impossible to fight that kind of urge, but keep trying!0
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Choosing a reply to these types of posts is difficult, because the program is simple math. Eat fewer calories than your body burns in a day. Keeping up with calories is simple - fast food places are great about posting calories. Even if you don't have a smart phone or internet access, there's never a valid reason for not tracking your calories because pencil and paper works.
Every bite is a choice.
It really is that simple. Every other "reason" we give ourselves for misbehaving around food is us enabling ourselves.
There is a difference between "wish" and "want". If we say we "want" to lose weight, yet we choose to overeat, then what we really want is instant gratification, the satisfaction that comes from rebellion around food rules, the immediate craving satisfaction, etc. - we don't really want to lose weight. We WISH we could lose weight.
When a person WANTS to lose weight, their choices reflect that.
I say this with the perspective of someone who used to wish for a fit healthy body, and who struggled for years with overweight and tried everything and paid a lot of money and did it every unhealthy way... and now I'm a person who WANTS to be fit and healthy every day. I've been logging for 180 days in a row and I don't eat over my calorie limit EVER. Not even on Thanksgiving. When you choose properly there is plenty to eat. I don't eliminate anything and it has really given me complete and total freedom around food and has eliminated my cravings. I'm a nurse but I don't fault anyone for fast food choices - at least they've done the calorie work for us.
Every bite is a choice.
What do you WANT? You may just not be ready yet - and that's ok! It works - but only if you work it.
Best of luck to you!0 -
Choosing a reply to these types of posts is difficult, because the program is simple math. Eat fewer calories than your body burns in a day. Keeping up with calories is simple - fast food places are great about posting calories. Even if you don't have a smart phone or internet access, there's never a valid reason for not tracking your calories because pencil and paper works.
Every bite is a choice.
It really is that simple. Every other "reason" we give ourselves for misbehaving around food is us enabling ourselves.
There is a difference between "wish" and "want". If we say we "want" to lose weight, yet we choose to overeat, then what we really want is instant gratification, the satisfaction that comes from rebellion around food rules, the immediate craving satisfaction, etc. - we don't really want to lose weight. We WISH we could lose weight.
When a person WANTS to lose weight, their choices reflect that.
I say this with the perspective of someone who used to wish for a fit healthy body, and who struggled for years with overweight and tried everything and paid a lot of money and did it every unhealthy way... and now I'm a person who WANTS to be fit and healthy every day. I've been logging for 180 days in a row and I don't eat over my calorie limit EVER. Not even on Thanksgiving. When you choose properly there is plenty to eat. I don't eliminate anything and it has really given me complete and total freedom around food and has eliminated my cravings. I'm a nurse but I don't fault anyone for fast food choices - at least they've done the calorie work for us.
Every bite is a choice.
What do you WANT? You may just not be ready yet - and that's ok! It works - but only if you work it.
Best of luck to you!
I love this- will think about WANTING rather than WISHING in future. THANKYOU0 -
I can relate to you. I too have a busy life, 3 young kids, husband, job, and I dont feel like I have time right now in my life to exercise either. I would like to, but I just can't seem to find any extra time. So...I am doing this a bit different than others it seems...exercise isnt even my goal right now...just trying to tweak my intake to work better for me. I did some little things to motivate myself to have a more healthy food attitude.
1 i got some gum I really like.
2 I bought myself a fancy water cup.
3 I drink water...goal is at least 8 c a day. And i measured it in my fancy water cup...lol
4 I weigh myself every morning to stay motivated I love to see the numbers change and track my progress w reports on mfp.
5 I didnt like my job so i applied for what i liked and waited and waited and prayed and waited 10 mos...and landed my perfect job...i start in a few days
6 i eat everything i want but i track it. And try to make healthier choices so my calories fit. I feel raw fruit and veggies are ok to go over with no guilt, if i ate it raw, i was really hungry...
7 i was fixated on food for awhile, so i upped my calories...im at 1580 right now and i still go over sometimes...but i keep going. This is my new way of life.
And so far, most days its working, im disapointed in myself sometimes, but overall, i'm proud of the new me. You can do this, keep going. Change your calories, see if that helps, mayb try something thats worked for someone else, stay positive.0 -
I think you have lots of things going that could increase your appetite to ravenous levels. The BC will probably settle out, but it might take a couple of months! Also, if you just started new workouts like that they can definitely make you hungrier. I got so hungry at first. Now I actually have less appetite from working out, but it was crazy at the beginning.
Eating more protein helped me a lot, and fiber also helped. With the various hormonal issues you have going on right now from stress, BC, and exercise, do try to avoid lots of fast food if you can. Frozen dinners are even better, believe it or not. They have lots of good Mexican food in the frozen section; you might check that out! Yes, they are still high in sodium and processed, but they are better than the fast food versions. They'll be more likely to not give you crazy cravings, too, if you pick from the healthy (well more healthy) brands. Those do try for more balance than Taco Bell does0 -
Kinda hurts when you post something so intimate and get no replies huh! Don't worry though, you're not invisible, we just don't always see posts!
I often struggle with that, and I don't think it's hormonal I think it's mostly just emotional. I had a really bloody awful job which was physically exhausting and emotionally dreadful. It was hard work, hard hours and there was barely a return for the hard labour. I still managed to lose weight (how? I don't know - probably because I worked at least 50hrs a week doing really high-intensity cardio. As a nurse you walk at LEAST 10 or so kms a day) but ate the worst of the worst. Nearly every night it was a Maccas run or something else deep fried. I think that when life is stressful and unrewarding, we start to feel emotionally unsatisfied and turn to alternatives to meet those basic needs of satisfaction. For me, I quit my job and instantly lost two kgs and have eaten maccas twice since then. Quitting your job mightn't be an option, and it doesn't sound like it as you have two jobs, and if you can't find another job, you need to meet your needs in another way. So how you're doing it is needing to eat more. No, that's not saying that you have an emotional eating problem, either. I think you have a job/life satisfaction problem!
Alternatives could be:
- cutting back hours at work
- joining a class for personal interest (craft, yoga, tai chi, pilates, painting, language lessons)
- being around friends and being social more often. (I don't go out with my friends. We always sit at home and have a cuppa and it is always the best thing ever. We often catch up on weekends with their kids and I spend the whole weekend there, just helping out/cleaning their house/minding the kids/playing with the kids/chatting to them/etc. and it's really bonding. So much fun too. Oh, and the best? Free! Yay! Stress-less!) Mind you, I have two close friends that are in the same state as me, you don't need a million friends to enjoy a rich social life!
- reading a book
- having a bath at home, instead of a shower
- planning your future (I always find this helps when I feel like the present seems miserable or stressful!)
- having more activity in your life. Me and my man have taken an interest in hiking and are working towards going on a three-day 60km hike (woah. Seems currently impossible haha!). It's really valuable doing something enjoyable; free/cheap; applicable to any weather (although, that's only if you're daring!); doing something with another person and having a common goal. We also do things like ride motorbikes together, play board games together, run around the yard with the dog together and sit at our parents' houses together!
- spending more time under the sun than under the roof. It's unbelievably valuable. Today, it was decent weather (not hot, and very windy) and I went and lay on the concrete to sunbake. Why not?! It was really relaxing, totally soothing, completely free, completely doable for however long I wanted to, non-restrictive and fun!
Just noticing that you are feeling unsatisfied is hugely satisfying. It is such a deep emotion and usually goes unrecognised. Most people usually say they are bored or just feeling 'bleh' or want a change, or can't stand things the way they are, or keep wanting things to be different or, on the other hand, completely avoid the emotion (as they probably can't see it or understand it) and try to fill a void. (I said void as a hole can be filled, a void? Not so easily!)
You can absolutely message me if you want to talk about it more, hopefully it makes sense and I really hope you can relate to it (mostly because it'd mean an answer for you, and hopefully less wanting to eat!!!!)0 -
I also looked at your diary. Your ticker looks like you'd like to lose 60+ lbs? What are your stats? I think 1400 cals may be too aggressive for you and the restriction is causing issues. Do you have a food scale? Are you weighing and measuring everything? Looks like there are a lot of estimations on there (McD side salad with what looks like a homecooked meal). Weigh EVERYTHING and write it all down - even ketchup. This doesn't take willpower - just don't be lazy. What is your free time like? Looks like you could benefit from some light exercise. And, I know you have time. If I have time, you have time. You just need to make yourself and your health a priority in your life. You don't want it bad enough.
I use a scale often, but not all times. And No, I DO NOT always have time to exercise. I work 20-30 hours a week in a hospital that is an hour from where I live. I also work full time nearby where I live. Please don't say things like that "I don't want it bad enough" or tell me I'm "lazy". NOT APPRECIATED. I work MANY hours per week. Minimum of 60, not including drive time... max of 90 hours.
Also, I don't count exercise because I use a fitbit, and somedays I CANNOT get up to my step goal because I'm chained to a desk in an ER. When I go to the gym and do things, or when I do a kettlebell workout, it doesn't decrease my calories so why add it on here? I keep track of it in a calendar. I'm VERY strong. My bodyfat percentage does not match up with my bmi. If I kept all my muscle mass, but lost all body fat I would still weigh over 140 lbs, where some women at my height can weigh 135 lbs. I CAN'T.
Also, my boyfriend is a manager at McDonalds. So yes, sometimes I will put a mcdonalds side salad down because HE is making it based on the specifications from where he works. I don't use anywhere close to the amount of dressing the salad stipulates though. So I decrease the side by an estimation. Clearly, I know HOW to count. I just don't quite know HOW to keep my counts down to 1400 lately, which is what MFP put me at. I didn't choose the number.
If it's so easy for you, MISS, then why the hell are you on here? Don't need "tough love". Need some tips. Some support.
Ok, first things first. When I first responded I gave you some tips. You said, "yeah, doesn't work" I just eat it out if the freezer, I can't say no, etc. so, at that point it is just sheer willpower. A lot of time passes for you to think about eating something when you have to go to the kitchen, get it out if the freezer and heat it up. If losing weight was truly important to you then you would find the will to say no. No one will say no for you. And I didn't call you lazy. I said not logging accurately is laziness because that doesn't take willpower. Using a scale and logging accurately are TIPS to successful weight loss. I suggested more exercise because that will give you more calories to use. I asked your stats because perhaps, with a fitbit, tdee would be a better method for you. I have a full time job, two kids, a commute too, and a husband. I had all of that and an ailing mother and I still found time to exercise when recovering from knee surgery. It's called 4:30am. I'm not special which is why I know everyone can do it. I am on here because I had to lose baby weight and I learn a lot from other members about fitness and nutrition. I am sorry if it sounded snotty but the truth is the truth.
I felt at the beginning of your post that you meant well. But using terms like lazy does not sit well with me. I have great work ethic. Regardless of how you meant it, most of your post felt negative and judgemental. And I wasnt asking for technique. I was asking for help in pinpointing where my appetite is being difficult to control. Am I working too much? Am I sad about my job issues? Or ami having a hormonal issue because my eating has FELT OUT OF CONTROL. Im aware of when I'm simply screwing up. Making bad choices. The point was that I have tried to wait out the "hungry" feeling and it doesnt just go away.
Perhaps you felt you were being helpful by asking about my technique (weighing food not estimating etc) but that wasn't my question. I was asking for help in figuring out my thoughts vs it possibly being hormonal. And honestly, I understand and don't take offense when people talk about technique of calorie counting. It was your negative framing and word use that I didn't appreciate.0 -
Kinda hurts when you post something so intimate and get no replies huh! Don't worry though, you're not invisible, we just don't always see posts!
I often struggle with that, and I don't think it's hormonal I think it's mostly just emotional. I had a really bloody awful job which was physically exhausting and emotionally dreadful. It was hard work, hard hours and there was barely a return for the hard labour. I still managed to lose weight (how? I don't know - probably because I worked at least 50hrs a week doing really high-intensity cardio. As a nurse you walk at LEAST 10 or so kms a day) but ate the worst of the worst. Nearly every night it was a Maccas run or something else deep fried. I think that when life is stressful and unrewarding, we start to feel emotionally unsatisfied and turn to alternatives to meet those basic needs of satisfaction. For me, I quit my job and instantly lost two kgs and have eaten maccas twice since then. Quitting your job mightn't be an option, and it doesn't sound like it as you have two jobs, and if you can't find another job, you need to meet your needs in another way. So how you're doing it is needing to eat more. No, that's not saying that you have an emotional eating problem, either. I think you have a job/life satisfaction problem!
Alternatives could be:
- cutting back hours at work
- joining a class for personal interest (craft, yoga, tai chi, pilates, painting, language lessons)
- being around friends and being social more often. (I don't go out with my friends. We always sit at home and have a cuppa and it is always the best thing ever. We often catch up on weekends with their kids and I spend the whole weekend there, just helping out/cleaning their house/minding the kids/playing with the kids/chatting to them/etc. and it's really bonding. So much fun too. Oh, and the best? Free! Yay! Stress-less!) Mind you, I have two close friends that are in the same state as me, you don't need a million friends to enjoy a rich social life!
- reading a book
- having a bath at home, instead of a shower
- planning your future (I always find this helps when I feel like the present seems miserable or stressful!)
- having more activity in your life. Me and my man have taken an interest in hiking and are working towards going on a three-day 60km hike (woah. Seems currently impossible haha!). It's really valuable doing something enjoyable; free/cheap; applicable to any weather (although, that's only if you're daring!); doing something with another person and having a common goal. We also do things like ride motorbikes together, play board games together, run around the yard with the dog together and sit at our parents' houses together!
- spending more time under the sun than under the roof. It's unbelievably valuable. Today, it was decent weather (not hot, and very windy) and I went and lay on the concrete to sunbake. Why not?! It was really relaxing, totally soothing, completely free, completely doable for however long I wanted to, non-restrictive and fun!
Just noticing that you are feeling unsatisfied is hugely satisfying. It is such a deep emotion and usually goes unrecognised. Most people usually say they are bored or just feeling 'bleh' or want a change, or can't stand things the way they are, or keep wanting things to be different or, on the other hand, completely avoid the emotion (as they probably can't see it or understand it) and try to fill a void. (I said void as a hole can be filled, a void? Not so easily!)
You can absolutely message me if you want to talk about it more, hopefully it makes sense and I really hope you can relate to it (mostly because it'd mean an answer for you, and hopefully less wanting to eat!!!!)
Thank you for your post. I definitely feel dissatisfied between my two jobs. The last time I felt really good about my counting and work outs was last jan until around march. During that time I felt sufficiently challenged with my studies at school, I was mostly working one job (full time) and my boss at that job was going through problems and took a 45 day leave of absence, leaving me in charge. I felt appreciated by my coworkers. I could walk around at school and I did zombies, run at night after work nearly every night. Then my boss came back and because of her embarrassment at the things she neglected the last two years and probably her great of being fired, she became extremely critical of everything I did and do and shows no appreciation of the hours and time I put in assisting her with her job duties. And finals hit. After school was done I started working a lot. Trying really hard to get out of my full time job. But there wasn't anything available. Every application has been returned with "we have more qualified applicants". It hurts like hell. Nearly 10 years of trying to be that indispensible employee and person is really hard to swallow with several thousand in student loans and to "better myself" and being rejected everytime I go for a promotion or job change. So a bachelors degree and 5 years working at hospital 9 at my fulltime job and I can't get anywhere.
I know others have it worse than me. I just have that American idea that if you work hard you will get what you want. You don't always.0 -
When I started birth control, a similar thing happened to me. Something that has helped me personally (and. I say personally because this may not work for everyone) is to just eat. Eat healthy if you crave healthy, or eat a different way. Listen to your body, and if its just stress eating, try to find someone who you are comfortable with. Talk to them, set aside time for yourself and Color on paper. Its therapeutic
So maybe you'll gain weight. Maybe you'll go way over calories. Tell yourself it is temporary, it was for me. As my body adjusted to BC, things seemed to level out.
Also, find ways to move around. It seemed to make the side affects from my BC pills less intense.
Edited because of autocorrect's dumbness.0 -
I also looked at your diary. Your ticker looks like you'd like to lose 60+ lbs? What are your stats? I think 1400 cals may be too aggressive for you and the restriction is causing issues. Do you have a food scale? Are you weighing and measuring everything? Looks like there are a lot of estimations on there (McD side salad with what looks like a homecooked meal). Weigh EVERYTHING and write it all down - even ketchup. This doesn't take willpower - just don't be lazy. What is your free time like? Looks like you could benefit from some light exercise. And, I know you have time. If I have time, you have time. You just need to make yourself and your health a priority in your life. You don't want it bad enough.
I use a scale often, but not all times. And No, I DO NOT always have time to exercise. I work 20-30 hours a week in a hospital that is an hour from where I live. I also work full time nearby where I live. Please don't say things like that "I don't want it bad enough" or tell me I'm "lazy". NOT APPRECIATED. I work MANY hours per week. Minimum of 60, not including drive time... max of 90 hours.
Also, I don't count exercise because I use a fitbit, and somedays I CANNOT get up to my step goal because I'm chained to a desk in an ER. When I go to the gym and do things, or when I do a kettlebell workout, it doesn't decrease my calories so why add it on here? I keep track of it in a calendar. I'm VERY strong. My bodyfat percentage does not match up with my bmi. If I kept all my muscle mass, but lost all body fat I would still weigh over 140 lbs, where some women at my height can weigh 135 lbs. I CAN'T.
Also, my boyfriend is a manager at McDonalds. So yes, sometimes I will put a mcdonalds side salad down because HE is making it based on the specifications from where he works. I don't use anywhere close to the amount of dressing the salad stipulates though. So I decrease the side by an estimation. Clearly, I know HOW to count. I just don't quite know HOW to keep my counts down to 1400 lately, which is what MFP put me at. I didn't choose the number.
If it's so easy for you, MISS, then why the hell are you on here? Don't need "tough love". Need some tips. Some support.
Ok, first things first. When I first responded I gave you some tips. You said, "yeah, doesn't work" I just eat it out if the freezer, I can't say no, etc. so, at that point it is just sheer willpower. A lot of time passes for you to think about eating something when you have to go to the kitchen, get it out if the freezer and heat it up. If losing weight was truly important to you then you would find the will to say no. No one will say no for you. And I didn't call you lazy. I said not logging accurately is laziness because that doesn't take willpower. Using a scale and logging accurately are TIPS to successful weight loss. I suggested more exercise because that will give you more calories to use. I asked your stats because perhaps, with a fitbit, tdee would be a better method for you. I have a full time job, two kids, a commute too, and a husband. I had all of that and an ailing mother and I still found time to exercise when recovering from knee surgery. It's called 4:30am. I'm not special which is why I know everyone can do it. I am on here because I had to lose baby weight and I learn a lot from other members about fitness and nutrition. I am sorry if it sounded snotty but the truth is the truth.
I felt at the beginning of your post that you meant well. But using terms like lazy does not sit well with me. I have great work ethic. Regardless of how you meant it, most of your post felt negative and judgemental. And I wasnt asking for technique. I was asking for help in pinpointing where my appetite is being difficult to control. Am I working too much? Am I sad about my job issues? Or ami having a hormonal issue because my eating has FELT OUT OF CONTROL. Im aware of when I'm simply screwing up. Making bad choices. The point was that I have tried to wait out the "hungry" feeling and it doesnt just go away.
Perhaps you felt you were being helpful by asking about my technique (weighing food not estimating etc) but that wasn't my question. I was asking for help in figuring out my thoughts vs it possibly being hormonal. And honestly, I understand and don't take offense when people talk about technique of calorie counting. It was your negative framing and word use that I didn't appreciate.
With respect, if you feel out of control, please talk to a medical professional. If you have any inkling that you are fighting a hormone imbalance, your gyn or and endocrinologist should be adressing these issues with you. Hormone imbalances can undermine your best efforts to get adequate sleep, control your diet and manage your stress. Those three things alone are enough to counteract sincere efforts to be become/remain fit. Please don't put yourself in the position of fighting that uphill battle. Find out for sure if your body is out of balance. You are worth it!0 -
I also looked at your diary. Your ticker looks like you'd like to lose 60+ lbs? What are your stats? I think 1400 cals may be too aggressive for you and the restriction is causing issues. Do you have a food scale? Are you weighing and measuring everything? Looks like there are a lot of estimations on there (McD side salad with what looks like a homecooked meal). Weigh EVERYTHING and write it all down - even ketchup. This doesn't take willpower - just don't be lazy. What is your free time like? Looks like you could benefit from some light exercise. And, I know you have time. If I have time, you have time. You just need to make yourself and your health a priority in your life. You don't want it bad enough.
I use a scale often, but not all times. And No, I DO NOT always have time to exercise. I work 20-30 hours a week in a hospital that is an hour from where I live. I also work full time nearby where I live. Please don't say things like that "I don't want it bad enough" or tell me I'm "lazy". NOT APPRECIATED. I work MANY hours per week. Minimum of 60, not including drive time... max of 90 hours.
Also, I don't count exercise because I use a fitbit, and somedays I CANNOT get up to my step goal because I'm chained to a desk in an ER. When I go to the gym and do things, or when I do a kettlebell workout, it doesn't decrease my calories so why add it on here? I keep track of it in a calendar. I'm VERY strong. My bodyfat percentage does not match up with my bmi. If I kept all my muscle mass, but lost all body fat I would still weigh over 140 lbs, where some women at my height can weigh 135 lbs. I CAN'T.
Also, my boyfriend is a manager at McDonalds. So yes, sometimes I will put a mcdonalds side salad down because HE is making it based on the specifications from where he works. I don't use anywhere close to the amount of dressing the salad stipulates though. So I decrease the side by an estimation. Clearly, I know HOW to count. I just don't quite know HOW to keep my counts down to 1400 lately, which is what MFP put me at. I didn't choose the number.
If it's so easy for you, MISS, then why the hell are you on here? Don't need "tough love". Need some tips. Some support.
Ok, first things first. When I first responded I gave you some tips. You said, "yeah, doesn't work" I just eat it out if the freezer, I can't say no, etc. so, at that point it is just sheer willpower. A lot of time passes for you to think about eating something when you have to go to the kitchen, get it out if the freezer and heat it up. If losing weight was truly important to you then you would find the will to say no. No one will say no for you. And I didn't call you lazy. I said not logging accurately is laziness because that doesn't take willpower. Using a scale and logging accurately are TIPS to successful weight loss. I suggested more exercise because that will give you more calories to use. I asked your stats because perhaps, with a fitbit, tdee would be a better method for you. I have a full time job, two kids, a commute too, and a husband. I had all of that and an ailing mother and I still found time to exercise when recovering from knee surgery. It's called 4:30am. I'm not special which is why I know everyone can do it. I am on here because I had to lose baby weight and I learn a lot from other members about fitness and nutrition. I am sorry if it sounded snotty but the truth is the truth.
I felt at the beginning of your post that you meant well. But using terms like lazy does not sit well with me. I have great work ethic. Regardless of how you meant it, most of your post felt negative and judgemental. And I wasnt asking for technique. I was asking for help in pinpointing where my appetite is being difficult to control. Am I working too much? Am I sad about my job issues? Or ami having a hormonal issue because my eating has FELT OUT OF CONTROL. Im aware of when I'm simply screwing up. Making bad choices. The point was that I have tried to wait out the "hungry" feeling and it doesnt just go away.
Perhaps you felt you were being helpful by asking about my technique (weighing food not estimating etc) but that wasn't my question. I was asking for help in figuring out my thoughts vs it possibly being hormonal. And honestly, I understand and don't take offense when people talk about technique of calorie counting. It was your negative framing and word use that I didn't appreciate.
How are we supposed to help you determine that? We can't read your mind, we can't tell you if your hormones are screwed up, and we aren't with you every moment of the day.
My opinion? You're not eating enough which is why you have difficulty controlling your appetite. I would be interested in knowing your stats as well. I have never eaten less than 1800 to lose weight, even when I was only lightly active.0 -
I also looked at your diary. Your ticker looks like you'd like to lose 60+ lbs? What are your stats? I think 1400 cals may be too aggressive for you and the restriction is causing issues. Do you have a food scale? Are you weighing and measuring everything? Looks like there are a lot of estimations on there (McD side salad with what looks like a homecooked meal). Weigh EVERYTHING and write it all down - even ketchup. This doesn't take willpower - just don't be lazy. What is your free time like? Looks like you could benefit from some light exercise. And, I know you have time. If I have time, you have time. You just need to make yourself and your health a priority in your life. You don't want it bad enough.
I use a scale often, but not all times. And No, I DO NOT always have time to exercise. I work 20-30 hours a week in a hospital that is an hour from where I live. I also work full time nearby where I live. Please don't say things like that "I don't want it bad enough" or tell me I'm "lazy". NOT APPRECIATED. I work MANY hours per week. Minimum of 60, not including drive time... max of 90 hours.
Also, I don't count exercise because I use a fitbit, and somedays I CANNOT get up to my step goal because I'm chained to a desk in an ER. When I go to the gym and do things, or when I do a kettlebell workout, it doesn't decrease my calories so why add it on here? I keep track of it in a calendar. I'm VERY strong. My bodyfat percentage does not match up with my bmi. If I kept all my muscle mass, but lost all body fat I would still weigh over 140 lbs, where some women at my height can weigh 135 lbs. I CAN'T.
Also, my boyfriend is a manager at McDonalds. So yes, sometimes I will put a mcdonalds side salad down because HE is making it based on the specifications from where he works. I don't use anywhere close to the amount of dressing the salad stipulates though. So I decrease the side by an estimation. Clearly, I know HOW to count. I just don't quite know HOW to keep my counts down to 1400 lately, which is what MFP put me at. I didn't choose the number.
If it's so easy for you, MISS, then why the hell are you on here? Don't need "tough love". Need some tips. Some support.
Ok, first things first. When I first responded I gave you some tips. You said, "yeah, doesn't work" I just eat it out if the freezer, I can't say no, etc. so, at that point it is just sheer willpower. A lot of time passes for you to think about eating something when you have to go to the kitchen, get it out if the freezer and heat it up. If losing weight was truly important to you then you would find the will to say no. No one will say no for you. And I didn't call you lazy. I said not logging accurately is laziness because that doesn't take willpower. Using a scale and logging accurately are TIPS to successful weight loss. I suggested more exercise because that will give you more calories to use. I asked your stats because perhaps, with a fitbit, tdee would be a better method for you. I have a full time job, two kids, a commute too, and a husband. I had all of that and an ailing mother and I still found time to exercise when recovering from knee surgery. It's called 4:30am. I'm not special which is why I know everyone can do it. I am on here because I had to lose baby weight and I learn a lot from other members about fitness and nutrition. I am sorry if it sounded snotty but the truth is the truth.
I felt at the beginning of your post that you meant well. But using terms like lazy does not sit well with me. I have great work ethic. Regardless of how you meant it, most of your post felt negative and judgemental. And I wasnt asking for technique. I was asking for help in pinpointing where my appetite is being difficult to control. Am I working too much? Am I sad about my job issues? Or ami having a hormonal issue because my eating has FELT OUT OF CONTROL. Im aware of when I'm simply screwing up. Making bad choices. The point was that I have tried to wait out the "hungry" feeling and it doesnt just go away.
Perhaps you felt you were being helpful by asking about my technique (weighing food not estimating etc) but that wasn't my question. I was asking for help in figuring out my thoughts vs it possibly being hormonal. And honestly, I understand and don't take offense when people talk about technique of calorie counting. It was your negative framing and word use that I didn't appreciate.
How are we supposed to help you determine that? We can't read your mind, we can't tell you if your hormones are screwed up, and we aren't with you every moment of the day.
My opinion? You're not eating enough which is why you have difficulty controlling your appetite. I would be interested in knowing your stats as well. I have never eaten less than 1800 to lose weight, even when I was only lightly active.
Read my first post. If you've ever ever been part of a discussion group that is how you explore things. People say things like I have a similar experience. .... and from that I can gain insight from others insights. This is how forum discussion works.
I've come to the conclusion based in many of the posts that I'm very much stuffing down angry feelings at work and eating. I've decided to increase my count to 1900 and focus on getting my work outs in, eating back half my exercise calories if I feel I need them.
When the one girl talked about why she thought it could be emotional eating I suddenly had this out pouring of frustration come to me as I responded to her post.0 -
Choosing a reply to these types of posts is difficult, because the program is simple math. Eat fewer calories than your body burns in a day. Keeping up with calories is simple - fast food places are great about posting calories. Even if you don't have a smart phone or internet access, there's never a valid reason for not tracking your calories because pencil and paper works.
Every bite is a choice.
It really is that simple. Every other "reason" we give ourselves for misbehaving around food is us enabling ourselves.
There is a difference between "wish" and "want". If we say we "want" to lose weight, yet we choose to overeat, then what we really want is instant gratification, the satisfaction that comes from rebellion around food rules, the immediate craving satisfaction, etc. - we don't really want to lose weight. We WISH we could lose weight.
When a person WANTS to lose weight, their choices reflect that.
I say this with the perspective of someone who used to wish for a fit healthy body, and who struggled for years with overweight and tried everything and paid a lot of money and did it every unhealthy way... and now I'm a person who WANTS to be fit and healthy every day. I've been logging for 180 days in a row and I don't eat over my calorie limit EVER. Not even on Thanksgiving. When you choose properly there is plenty to eat. I don't eliminate anything and it has really given me complete and total freedom around food and has eliminated my cravings. I'm a nurse but I don't fault anyone for fast food choices - at least they've done the calorie work for us.
Every bite is a choice.
What do you WANT? You may just not be ready yet - and that's ok! It works - but only if you work it.
Best of luck to you!
I WANT you to come and talk to my at-risk students, the ones who wish they were doing better in school, but who don't do their homework, read, or participate in class. They need to hear what you have to say. This is the best message I've seen in a while.0 -
Thanks, teach ; )0
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