Help! Disappointed, as usual :(

Let me start by saying that I am just returning to MFP and watching what I eat after several months break. I am 5'4" and 170 pounds. My goal weight is 150. I am 42 years old and have seen a HUGE change in my ability to maintain my goal weight since hitting 40. I know a week is a short time to judge success of any lifestyle change but I am FRUSTRATED! One week ago I started using Ideal Shape shakes. I use it once per day to replace my morning breakfast. I eat normal meals and track otherwise. I have not been working out, partly because of time and partly due to a foot injury. I plan on getting back into the gym now, as I was cleared by my second dr to do so, with some limitations.

So, I track my food, watch what I eat and NOTHING...actually a .5 pound gain. I am so frustrated, discouraged, annoyed..........My friend does a cleanse and loses 5 pounds in 1 week and I gain .5 I have opened my diary for all to see. I do use a fitbit M-F and allow it to add calories burned to MFP. Please, Please, give me some advise, pointers, inspiration.....I am afraid I am going to give up again.

It is so frustrating because weight use to fall off of me before hitting 40, now it is so hard. TIA

Oh, and can someone help me with my base calorie intake? I am not sure if 1600 is correct...perhaps this is my problem??

Charlene
«1

Replies

  • 00NL
    00NL Posts: 171 Member
    hi not very experienced but still

    start exercise as soon as possible
    and lower calories a bit without exercise

    one week cannot bring any changes especially without exercise
    look for another 7 days into it.
  • JesterMFP
    JesterMFP Posts: 3,596 Member
    Weigh/measure your food accurately (with a digital food scale if possible) and track everything. For example - in your diary you have entries such as "one piece" or "one slice". These are not likely to be accurate. You also have a mixture of grams and ounces which makes me wonder if you are weighing these things or just guessing.

    It's only been a week, which really is too soon to judge progress. Weight fluctuates all the time, and 0.5 lbs can easily be part of those normal fluctuations. Nothing to worry about yet. Carry on for a couple of weeks, and if you still don't lose anything, lower your calories a little.

    Your friend did not lose 5 lbs of fat in a week with "cleansing". Please don't be tempted to go down that route. It's great for losing water weight, and, if done aggressively enough, for losing lean mass and getting malnourished. Really not the best way to lose fat (and keep it off).

    The meal replacement shakes are not necessary by any means (but are also no problem if they help you keep within your calories.)

    By all means, get exercising as soon as you can, but nail down the calorie intake first, as that is where the weight loss really comes from.

    This takes time and patience. I know it's frustrating when you don't see results at first, but where is giving up going to get you? :flowerforyou:
  • cherrybomb526
    cherrybomb526 Posts: 13 Member
    A couple of things...

    When you first get started weight won't necessarily fall off immediately. My suggestion would be to not weigh yourself for a few weeks and give your body time to adjust to new levels of activity and new foods. I haven't weighed myself in years (I even look away at my annual weigh-in at the doctor). The scale for some people is a huge mindf*** and might not give useful information (especially for women with hormonal weight fluctuations throughout the month). Try taking some photos and getting some solid measurements and then just plug away for a while and revisit later to see what's working or not working. Are you planning on any strength training? I know you've heard it a million times, but losing %body fat won't always appear as a loss on the scale.

    In that same vein, 1600 might be too many calories, it might not. If that is a satisfying amount for you, go with it for a few weeks and then check your photos, scale, and measurements and see what happened. In my opinion, it's better to lose slowly and not be hungry all the time. That keeps me from binging, and it's more sustainable in the long term. When you start exercising 1600 might be more appropriate.

    Looks like you're eating a lot of processed foods (crackers, ice cream bars, MR shakes, coffee creamer, pretzels). My mood and energy improved a lot when I replaced those foods with meat, vegetables, and simple carbs (quinoa, wild rice, farrow). A lot of us are sensitive to preservatives and additives but don't realize until we give them up. If I were you, I'd track sugar as well, just to see.

    You're doing really great on getting enough protein. Keep it up!

    Just a quick rant on fat free dairy...I think it's a waste of time. I don't know if you agree, but I think it tastes terrible. Eating 1 oz of full-fat cheese, or 1/2 cup of full-fat yogurt is gonna keep you full for way longer and will maintain the nutrients that are taken out with the cream in low-fat dairy. This is totally my opinion, but I've found that full-fat in moderation is way more satisfying in terms of taste and nutrition. Eating less fat isn't going to make you lose more fat.

    Long story short, you're doing a great job. Keep it up and see how things go. Don't be discouraged by a half pound gain the first week--that can be because of ANYTHING. If you need to do something to keep up motivation, reign in your intake by 100 cals and then push away for a few weeks. Keep it up! A 5 pound loss due to a cleanse is going to mean a 5 lb gain the next week :)
  • brandiuntz
    brandiuntz Posts: 2,717 Member
    1. One week is not enough to judge. .5lb could be natural body fluctuation.

    2. Patience. Weight loss can be slow, especially with only 20lb to lose.

    3. Consider NOT doing shakes, cleanses, or any fad thing to lose weight. If you want to lose weight and keep it off for life, you need to find a way to eat that will work for the rest of your life. Permanent Lifestyle change.

    4. Is your MFP goal set to lose 1lb a week or more? Set it to .5lb and try that. With only about 20lb to lose, .5lb is a better weekly target.

    5. Don't allow age to be a discouragement. I'm 42 and in the best shape of my life. I actually focus on body composition now, not the scale. Plenty others here even older can tell you the same thing.

    6. Once your injury has healed, get back to exercise. It will help and has many benefits.

    Good luck. You can do it.
  • TX_Rhon
    TX_Rhon Posts: 1,549 Member
    Give it longer than one week. Most cleanses require cutting back on certain foods (calories) during the cleanse which result in a loss. Your body naturally cleanses itself so don't waste your money. Make sure you are logging correctly. Lots of sushi - yum!! But are the measurements corrects?? Also check your sodium.

    Calories in/Calories out - trust the process. It works.

    Good luck!
  • AmyRhubarb
    AmyRhubarb Posts: 6,890 Member
    I'm also in my 40's and have struggled with the fact that it's harder to lose weight now. But not impossible, and giving up certainly isn't going to help. :smile:

    I looked over your diary and I think it looks pretty good! As for the .5lb gain - that's nothing, not worth stressing over, but something to get used to seeing if you're gonna stick with this for good. Weight loss isn't linear - you will have losses, you will have gains. I guarantee you that half a pound was not a half a pound of fat. It could be due to water retention (salty foods, sore muscles, etc), hormones, food/waste in your system that hasn't passed yet - whatever! Your friend who lost 5lbs in a week with a cleanse? Water weight - not fat, and as soon as she eats normally again, those pounds will be back.

    I would advise grabbing a tape measure and a camera and start tracking your measurements and taking some pics (you don't have to show anyone but you!) - these two things will often show you progress while the scale is busy messing with your head. Perfect example - I dropped a full pants size while my scale stayed exactly the same. I laughed at my scale, kicked it into the corner and went out and bought new jeans. Don't rely solely on the scale for checking progress!

    As for calorie goal - it looks good to me, and if you entered your info and goal accurately and realistically when you set up your MPF account, you're good to go. Keep in mind that the daily goal you're given already has that deficit built in - meaning eat to goal every day, do zero exercise, and you'll lose weight. Make sure you're eating at least a good portion of your exercise cals back to bring your net cals to, or very near goal every day, otherwise you're creating too large a deficit which can backfire on ya over time.

    Log as accurately as possible, weigh and measure foods and track everything you eat. Drink plenty of water. Get good rest. As for exercise, keep in mind that diet is for weight loss, exercise is for fitness, so don't stress if you're not able to exercise as much as you'd like. You can still drop the pounds through eating the right amount of cals.

    Have patience - if you want to make the changes and do the things that you can stick with for life, it will take some time to get there. But it's worth it, and you CAN do it! :smile: Good luck!
  • BR48
    BR48 Posts: 2 Member
    1600 is to high for your current weight and height. You need to stay between 1200 to 1400 calories. I am 5.4 and I have lost from 243 to 176 lbs. some weeks I do not show a loss and some week I show a 1 to 2 lb. loss. It has taken me a year to get to were I currently am and I still have about 30 lbs. to go so you can do this with patience and persistence.

    I do not eat any fried foods and barely any red meat or white foods like pasta, rice, white potatoes, white bread, I do eat a lot of grilled or baked fish and chicken. a huge helping or two of green veggies steamed but with out butter. I eat berries almost every day. I go to Aldi's and buy fresh strawberries every week, (I know that they are more expensive now but the are so much cheaper at Aldi Food Store then at the other grocery stores. I cut them up and put the Aldi food store's generic non calorie sweeter on them. I bought a lot of blue berries back with they were in season and cheap and froze them so now I add some of the frozen blueberries to the strawberries UMMMM they are so good together! I eat Greek yogurt, 1% cottage cheese, boiled eggs, very little cheese and only reduced fat. I do not buy any snacking foods because I can not control myself not to eat the hold bag. LOL
    I hope that this helps you. Don't let your disappointment cause you to give up. You just need to find out what works for your. Switch some of your foods around and be sure to stay under 1400 calories tops. Good luck! I know you have it in you to succeed!
  • BigGuy47
    BigGuy47 Posts: 1,768 Member
    1. One week is not enough to judge. .5lb could be natural body fluctuation.

    2. Patience. Weight loss can be slow, especially with only 20lb to lose.

    3. Consider NOT doing shakes, cleanses, or any fad thing to lose weight. If you want to lose weight and keep it off for life, you need to find a way to eat that will work for the rest of your life. Permanent Lifestyle change.

    4. Is your MFP goal set to lose 1lb a week or more? Set it to .5lb and try that. With only about 20lb to lose, .5lb is a better weekly target.

    5. Don't allow age to be a discouragement. I'm 42 and in the best shape of my life. I actually focus on body composition now, not the scale. Plenty others here even older can tell you the same thing.

    6. Once your injury has healed, get back to exercise. It will help and has many benefits.

    Good luck. You can do it.
    Solid post.

    I would add one more item to the list.

    7. Change your mindset.
    The thread title, Disappointed as usual, suggests that you expect yourself to fail. Stop doing that, set goals and challenge yourself to meet those goals. If you think "I will fail", you probably will fail again. Change your mindset and change your results.
  • extraordinary_machine
    extraordinary_machine Posts: 3,028 Member
    1600 is to high for your current weight and height. You need to stay between 1200 to 1400 calories.

    Sorry, but I respectfull call BS on this. I'm 40, 5'3", and when I was losing, I was doing it by eating 1700-1800 cals a day. (I ate back my exercise calories.)

    There are several calorie calculators that are more in depth than MFP's. Scooby's is a good one, or you can search the forums for heybales' spreadsheet, which also give a more in depth look at your measurements, activity level, etc. I'm on my phone or I'd give you the links myself, but...phone=pain to navigate.

    Also, when you can start working out again, I HIGHLY recommend throwing some strength training into the mix. Personally, I like to throw heavy weights around, but body weight stuff can be just as beneficial and you can do it at home. Nerdfitness.com has a great beginning body weight workout plan. Building muscle can help stave off osteoporosis and a slew of other things that occur as we age.

    Good luck!!
  • ElizabethFuller
    ElizabethFuller Posts: 352 Member
    You can do this! I am 58 and have been on thyroid medication for about 12 years, I find losing weight a struggle but it can be done. Your daily calorie limit seems a little high, I'm 5'5", currently set to a 2lb a week weight loss and I'm allowed 1200 calories a day. Check your settings just to make sure.
    If you're really not losing weight (and it's too soon to tell yet) then you are either under-estimating what you eat or over-estimating your exercise. It's really important to weigh your food - was that banana really 90 calories? Could it actually have been 120 or 130? It's a nasty shock when you weigh some things! Only use measuring cups for liquids, scales in grams for all solids. Some of the calorie values on MFP are a bit freaky, if in doubt double check them against the stated amounts on packs or the USDA.
    It is definitely more difficult to lose weight as you get older, you have to work harder (sadly!) but you can do it by gently re educating your eating habits, we're all here doing the same thing, ready to cheer you on! Go for it!
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    After reading about studies that showed BMR can vary by like 70% among people with the same LBM, I think it's kind of useless to compare your intake to others on the boards. It doesn't matter if X has to eat 1200 and Y gets to eat 1800. Between you being individual and everyone's logging being estimations (some decent, some terrible), just pick a level, check your results and make changes based on your loss or lack of loss.

    But a week is a pretty short test. I'd give it longer and I'd keep exercise out of the equation until you find an eating level you can lose at. You're not exercising, another week isn't going to kill you. But if you start now, then you get water retention issues muddying the waters more and if you're this disappointed and frustrated with one week or no results, you're going to quit entirely if you add exercise and don't see results, I think.
  • lindajay3
    lindajay3 Posts: 144 Member
    I also think your 1600 calories are fine - I'm 48 and agree with all previous posters that it is harder to lose or maintain now but we can do it!. As soon as you're able to get active and exercise you will see a change. It may be slow, but slow is better! I have found that adding some weight training into the mix has helped and made me feel better about how I look. Feel free to friend me if you need some motivation!:wink:
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    1600 is to high for your current weight and height. You need to stay between 1200 to 1400 calories.

    Sorry, but I respectfull call BS on this. I'm 40, 5'3", and when I was losing, I was doing it by eating 1700-1800 cals a day. (I ate back my exercise calories.)

    There are several calorie calculators that are more in depth than MFP's. Scooby's is a good one, or you can search the forums for heybales' spreadsheet, which also give a more in depth look at your measurements, activity level, etc. I'm on my phone or I'd give you the links myself, but...phone=pain to navigate.

    Also, when you can start working out again, I HIGHLY recommend throwing some strength training into the mix. Personally, I like to throw heavy weights around, but body weight stuff can be just as beneficial and you can do it at home. Nerdfitness.com has a great beginning body weight workout plan. Building muscle can help stave off osteoporosis and a slew of other things that occur as we age.

    Good luck!!

    I just ran OPs numbers on the Scooby's Workshop site and if she is not exercising, estimated TDEE is 1660 calories daily. So 1600 is not a cut... besides, we tend to underestimate our calories eaten.

    OP if you're starting to exercise, stay at 1600 and let your total daily burn increase from there, but don't eat back exercise calories. If you want to do things MFP's way, pop down to about 1400 or even 1300 and add in exercise calories each time you burn them.
  • focuseddiva
    focuseddiva Posts: 174 Member
    No specific advice I can give because I am new to this. Just wanted to say I feel your pain. What worked for me 4 years ago isn't working. I also felt a slowing when I hit 40. I have similar stats as u. 41 & 175 lbs. Looking to get to 150 as well. Keep it up. Giving up will frustrate u more. Good luck...
  • Be well, heal up. never give up. your message was heartfelt and although my advice is limited i send you positive energy. I'm in the struggle as well I'm in a good place right now but for me it will always be a battle. Ups' and downs will come. if you never get where you want to be fight the good fight. that's all you can ask of yourself. be honest with yourself. You know if you've given it your all. Like My Football coach always said "You gotta keep movin your feet" good luck
  • gsager
    gsager Posts: 977 Member
    How many calories does your fitbit say you're burning daily? Why do you just use it Monday thru Friday? That sounds like what I do for maintenance.
  • pollypocket3
    pollypocket3 Posts: 51 Member
    You said it yourself that 1 week was too soon to judge - because it is too soon to judge. Patience! I know we want what we want and we want it 5 minutes ago but as that annoying phrase goes - you didn't put it on in a (week, day, month.. blah blah blah), you're not going to be taking it off. As for your friend who did that cleanse. Chances are it's most likely water weight and she'll put it right back on... Either way, work towards you're goal, be diligent about it but don't get hard on yourself if you lose your footing along the way - just put yourself back on track.
  • gabrielleelliott90
    gabrielleelliott90 Posts: 854 Member
    I wouldn't worry about your friend. All she is losing is water weight. Are you aiming for a 2 pound or 1 pound loss? If you're aiming for 1 pound, try to go down to 2 pounds, it means less calories, but it should work. I believe when you start exercising the weight will shift also. When you are ready to go back to the gym, that should help a lot.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    After reading about studies that showed BMR can vary by like 70% among people with the same LBM, I think it's kind of useless to compare your intake to others on the boards. It doesn't matter if X has to eat 1200 and Y gets to eat 1800. Between you being individual and everyone's logging being estimations (some decent, some terrible), just pick a level, check your results and make changes based on your loss or lack of loss.

    But a week is a pretty short test. I'd give it longer and I'd keep exercise out of the equation until you find an eating level you can lose at. You're not exercising, another week isn't going to kill you. But if you start now, then you get water retention issues muddying the waters more and if you're this disappointed and frustrated with one week or no results, you're going to quit entirely if you add exercise and don't see results, I think.

    Do you have any links to those studies? Did they control for activity levels?
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    Hi. Consider having a look at what some of the members of this group are saying.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/506-near-or-post-menopausal-group

    You may have to make some additional changes now that you're in your 40s. ymmv of course.

    Best of luck!
  • I have started this weight lost challenge for me and my sister on thursday.

    week 1 drink 64oz of water each day
    week 2 no sweets
    week 3 workout 30 minute each day
    week 4 no alcohol
    week 5 no processed food

    I hope this work i will see if anyone want to try they are more than welcome to. Wish me luck
  • gabrielleelliott90
    gabrielleelliott90 Posts: 854 Member
    Btw, I'm 5'3, and I eat 1470 calories a day. That is for a pound loss a week. I do a lot of exercise so I eat most of my calories back. I think 1600 sounds right for a 5'4 person.
  • Jennacita
    Jennacita Posts: 116 Member
    1600 is to high for your current weight and height. You need to stay between 1200 to 1400 calories.

    Sorry, but I respectfull call BS on this. I'm 40, 5'3", and when I was losing, I was doing it by eating 1700-1800 cals a day. (I ate back my exercise calories.)

    There are several calorie calculators that are more in depth than MFP's. Scooby's is a good one, or you can search the forums for heybales' spreadsheet, which also give a more in depth look at your measurements, activity level, etc. I'm on my phone or I'd give you the links myself, but...phone=pain to navigate.

    Also, when you can start working out again, I HIGHLY recommend throwing some strength training into the mix. Personally, I like to throw heavy weights around, but body weight stuff can be just as beneficial and you can do it at home. Nerdfitness.com has a great beginning body weight workout plan. Building muscle can help stave off osteoporosis and a slew of other things that occur as we age.

    Good luck!!

    Well said. I will be 43 in 3 days. 1630 + eating exercise calories per MFP. I would recommend using Scooby also for a good calculation. A half pound gain is nothing. Try not to sweat it.

    I will add I am also finding it difficult to lose weight but that is due to my own inconsistencies.
  • matcartmill
    matcartmill Posts: 98 Member
    The first few weeks back after a fitness break are the most problematic. The metabolism takes time to kick back into high gear which allows for better fat burning. Also, eating better is a good start, but doing weight training and cardio go a lot further than simply calorie counting does. You need to be active for your body to keep stoking the metabolism furnace.

    Weigh yourself once a week, hit the gym, count calories. It's that easy, you just have to commit to it and give it time.
  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
    Metabolism. The most overrated excuse of them all.
  • mygrl4meee
    mygrl4meee Posts: 943 Member
    Good luck. I am 5'10 and 1540 is my calorie goal but I rarely eat that little since I eat back my exercise calories. Give it more time.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    Metabolism. The most overrated excuse of them all.
    ahh helpful advice to a woman in her 40s from a 30 year old male.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    After reading about studies that showed BMR can vary by like 70% among people with the same LBM, I think it's kind of useless to compare your intake to others on the boards. It doesn't matter if X has to eat 1200 and Y gets to eat 1800. Between you being individual and everyone's logging being estimations (some decent, some terrible), just pick a level, check your results and make changes based on your loss or lack of loss.

    But a week is a pretty short test. I'd give it longer and I'd keep exercise out of the equation until you find an eating level you can lose at. You're not exercising, another week isn't going to kill you. But if you start now, then you get water retention issues muddying the waters more and if you're this disappointed and frustrated with one week or no results, you're going to quit entirely if you add exercise and don't see results, I think.

    Do you have any links to those studies? Did they control for activity levels?

    See p.5 of the "naturally thin" thread. I assume they control for activity. The study was supposed to be on BMR.
  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
    Metabolism. The most overrated excuse of them all.
    ahh helpful advice to a woman in her 40s from a 30 year old male.

    So would you prefer it if I was in my 50s? Would that make my opinion more relevant?
  • charmcnab
    charmcnab Posts: 20 Member
    How many calories does your fitbit say you're burning daily? Why do you just use it Monday thru Friday? That sounds like what I do for maintenance.

    I only do M-F because on the weekends I do alot less walking and more sitting at home. During the week, I am in constant motion.