Should I listen to myself or to everyone around me?

I had a sleepover with my girl friends last night, they all say I'm getting too thin. I only used to hear that from my mom so I didnt mind but now that more people are saying it , I dont know what to believe in. They say my boobs are way smaller and that I look like a stick already (I dont think so lol) Should I believe in what I see or to what everyone else says? Personally, I think I'm "just right" now, I'm an average but i wanna be leaner. I wanna get rid of my belly pooch. I workout, cardio and strength training 6x a week. I also eat 1200 cals + exercise calories.
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Replies

  • gigglesinthesun
    gigglesinthesun Posts: 860 Member
    I had a sleepover with my girl friends last night, they all say I'm getting too thin. I only used to hear that from my mom so I didnt mind but now that more people are saying it , I dont know what to believe in. They say my boobs are way smaller and that I look like a stick already (I dont think so lol) Should I believe in what I see or to what everyone else says? Personally, I think I'm "just right" now, I'm an average but i wanna be leaner. I wanna get rid of my belly pooch. I workout, cardio and strength training 6x a week. I also eat 1200 cals + exercise calories.

    well, what are your stats now?
  • lauraspberry
    lauraspberry Posts: 655 Member

    well, what are your stats now?

    Height: 5'7
    Weight: 129
    Bust: 35
    Waist: 27
    Hips: 37

    My tummy is wider than my hips so I am wanting to get rid of that last bit of love handles
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    if you're still wearing old clothes, it might make you look even thinner. solution?? shopping spree!!!
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
    begrudgers, looking good
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    Your friends are jelly!
  • focuseddiva
    focuseddiva Posts: 174 Member
    How do YOU feel at this weight? That's what is important.

    Your stats seem reasonable -- it's hard to say, though, b/c everyone looks different.

    I'm an inch taller than you and probably much, much older. I was once 138-140, and I was told I looked way too thin at that weight. So it's all relative. It's just how you feel. Funny, when people used to say that to me, I took it as a compliment. Now I see photos of myself from then and think -- ick. Scary bones sticking out. Not good, and not sustainable.

    So I say listen to yourself but be realistic about what you can maintain, how you feel, and don't fall into the "thanks for calling me skinny" trap.
  • Chase YOUR dreams :smile:
  • mg720
    mg720 Posts: 212 Member
    i think you look great! i very often get from my family comments that i am too thin or "obsessed" with the gym. i brush it off because i know that they just are not a group of healthy people themselves and dont understand what it means to be "fit" in general. As long as you are not taking any extreme measures I say keep up the outstanding work!
  • BeccaBollons
    BeccaBollons Posts: 652 Member
    I'm an inch taller than you and my hips and waist are an inch bigger than yours. My friends all think I'm too thin as well. I don't get to go for girly sleepovers though- I'm an old married mum!! But I think my friends comments are partly motivated by envy- they all seem to go on diets all the time, and yoyo significantly at times. I haven't made a song and dance about losing weight, just ate less and moved more, and I think my friends can't get to grips with that.

    If your profile pic is your latest, you don't look overly thin to me. Slim, yes certainly, but that is a positive, not a negative.
  • WhisperAnne
    WhisperAnne Posts: 453 Member
    When I first lost weight everyone said I was getting to thin, and to this day some still say it. But I'm happy with how I look and if you are happy with your body then that's all that matters!
  • KateK8LoseW8
    KateK8LoseW8 Posts: 824 Member
    You look fine. Your friends are probably a bit envious. Even if they aren't, and are just genuinely concerned, keep in mind that a lot of people have a skewed perception of what a healthy weight really is. My BMI is 22, and people tell me that I'm skinny. I'm not skinny, I am, theoretically, completely average. But most people are overweight.
  • WhisperAnne
    WhisperAnne Posts: 453 Member
    also, we are almost the same in measurements - my waist is 26 inches but hips and bust are the same.
  • eazy_
    eazy_ Posts: 516 Member
    Listen to yourself.
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
    1) you look super

    2) you look super
  • lauraspberry
    lauraspberry Posts: 655 Member
    Thanks you guys :) I was just starting to get worried because I might be taking it too far or something. I know in myself that I am living a healthy lifestyle but with everybody starting to nag me about getting too thin I'm starting to think that maybe I have body image problems which might lead eventually to a disorder lol :laugh: but honestly, I believe I'm healthy. It's just that when people starts to get up on your a** you start to question yourself lol
  • focknfree
    focknfree Posts: 66 Member
    Listen to yourself and stick to your plans! If you want to get toned, just do what it takes to get there. Maybe your friends are jealous. I don't know. Just keep listening to yourself.
  • Frelling_Tralk
    Frelling_Tralk Posts: 56 Member
    People have said to me that you look just right now/don't lose any more (I've lost around 12 pounds so far), and it really plays with your head because I know for a fact that at 144 pounds I am nowhere near my ideal weight and have at least 20 pounds to go to tone up my thighs and stomach. I don't know why people say that really cause I'm blatantly not that slim yet. Well no one has said that I'm too skinny, but they make comments like don't lose any more, and that's when I still have a roll of fat round my middle! I don't know if it's it guys worrying that you will lose your curves if you get really slim, people worrying that you may take it too far and not know when to stop, or what...
  • Jestinia
    Jestinia Posts: 1,153 Member
    I'm surprised someone who lifts heavy hasn't come into this thread and recommended reducing the cardio and adding more weight to the weights to add muscle and reduce jiggle without becoming emaciated, so I'll just do it.

    Someone correct me if I'm wrong.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member

    well, what are your stats now?

    Height: 5'7
    Weight: 129
    Bust: 35
    Waist: 27
    Hips: 37

    My tummy is wider than my hips so I am wanting to get rid of that last bit of love handles

    You're getting close to 'underweight' BMI now (assuming you're an adult). From your ticker, it looks like you want to lose about 10 lbs. more? That will put you at underweight. Your friends might know something we don't. I think you should listen to them, regardless of what you see in the mirror.
  • lauraspberry
    lauraspberry Posts: 655 Member
    I'm surprised someone who lifts heavy hasn't come into this thread and recommended reducing the cardio and adding more weight to the weights to add muscle and reduce jiggle without becoming emaciated, so I'll just do it.

    Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

    The word jiggle is funny :laugh: anyway, I'm scared of adding weights. I might bulk up or something. I only use 5lbs dumbells. Not that I'm saying I'm not open to it, it's just that I dont know if I should do it or not. Personally, I enjoy strength training than cardio so if you'd say that I should decrease the cardio and be more into lifting then that would make me REALLY happy :))
  • lauraspberry
    lauraspberry Posts: 655 Member

    well, what are your stats now?

    Height: 5'7
    Weight: 129
    Bust: 35
    Waist: 27
    Hips: 37

    My tummy is wider than my hips so I am wanting to get rid of that last bit of love handles

    You're getting close to 'underweight' BMI now (assuming you're an adult). From your ticker, it looks like you want to lose about 10 lbs. more? That will put you at underweight. Your friends might know something we don't. I think you should listen to them, regardless of what you see in the mirror.

    Idk honestly. Lol. I'm quite disturbed by the belly fat. Not sure if it's necessary to lose 10lbs or what. My goal is to just get rid of the last bit of belly roll.
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member

    The word jiggle is funny :laugh: anyway, I'm scared of adding weights. I might bulk up or something. I only use 5lbs dumbells. Not that I'm saying I'm not open to it, it's just that I dont know if I should do it or not. Personally, I enjoy strength training than cardio so if you'd say that I should decrease the cardio and be more into lifting then that would make me REALLY happy :))

    You should decrease cardio and lift more. Better? You won't bulk up. I lift 3-4 times a week....do I look like a body builder? For what you want to achieve, heavy lifting is your best friend right now. You're already thin, you'll probably get results fairly quickly. Ditch the barbie dumbbells and pick up a barbell. :bigsmile:

    And as far as the original question.....as long as you don't have major body image issues or history of an eating disorder, listen to yourself. (as long as you aren't tell yourself something stupid like eat 600 calories a day)
  • nytrifisoul
    nytrifisoul Posts: 499 Member


    Idk honestly. Lol. I'm quite disturbed by the belly fat. Not sure if it's necessary to lose 10lbs or what. My goal is to just get rid of the last bit of belly roll.

    You look good, but could afford to lose 5-10 if thats your goal. Dont let others change your game plan, it will just take away your motivation.

  • well, what are your stats now?

    Height: 5'7
    Weight: 129
    Bust: 35
    Waist: 27
    Hips: 37

    My tummy is wider than my hips so I am wanting to get rid of that last bit of love handles

    You're getting close to 'underweight' BMI now (assuming you're an adult). From your ticker, it looks like you want to lose about 10 lbs. more? That will put you at underweight. Your friends might know something we don't. I think you should listen to them, regardless of what you see in the mirror.

    I'd tend to agree. How about compromise and stay where you are because you said you like it anyways, and not worry about losing more, which seems to put you solidly into underweight? Meaning, keep with the plan, just up tiny bit of calories and focus on weight training, recomp that belly, add muscle, losing fat, while staying the same weight.
  • I think that you look fine! Maybe just tone up with out losing weight

    Personally, I am 5'8 when I look back at pictures of myself as a teen at 125 I personally think I look gross and way to skinny. I want to be around 140 but toned.
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
    Losing another 9 lbs will put you on the verge of being underweight. I'd also ditch the barbie weights and use heavier resistance since 5 lbs isn't much for many large muscle exercises.Considering your present approach, you're likely losing a fair amount of lean mass with the fat mass. The result is you won't look as lean after weight loss compared to if you maintained lean mass.
  • cuinboston2014
    cuinboston2014 Posts: 848 Member
    This is all about you. People do get annoyed though if you become obsessive about it and when you are with your girlfriends for a relaxing night talk about all the things you can or can't eat because you want to lose 10 pounds when you are in a healhty weight already.

    Do some toning and worry less about the scale. But do what makes you happy as long as it's not an unhealthy obsession, etc. I think you look really good but I'm not you :)
  • subsonicbassist
    subsonicbassist Posts: 117 Member
    I'm surprised someone who lifts heavy hasn't come into this thread and recommended reducing the cardio and adding more weight to the weights to add muscle and reduce jiggle without becoming emaciated, so I'll just do it.

    Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

    The word jiggle is funny :laugh: anyway, I'm scared of adding weights. I might bulk up or something. I only use 5lbs dumbells. Not that I'm saying I'm not open to it, it's just that I dont know if I should do it or not. Personally, I enjoy strength training than cardio so if you'd say that I should decrease the cardio and be more into lifting then that would make me REALLY happy :))

    Not sure how using 5 lb. dumbbells is considered "strength training", but women do not produce enough testosterone naturally to build insane amounts of myself. You are already slim, heavy lifting will definitely add muscle where you need it and help you retain a womanly figure. Guys do love the curves, and strength training keeps you from getting "skinny fat" :)
  • Stripeness
    Stripeness Posts: 511 Member
    Weights aren't going to make you bulky - you'll see some great pic examples of that if you browse through the success stories! I heartily recommend lifting and believe you'll be very happy with the changes it brings.

    All the comments about jealousy are certainly possibilities. However, we don't know your friends. They may very well be sounding an alarm you *do* need to hear. Especially if you're hearing concern from different folks at different times. And kudos to you for reaching out for more opinions in case your perspective is beginning to skew - knowing that can happen shows great awareness on your part!

    Your pic doesn't look as if you're skeletal, yet I can't jump on the "how you feel" bandwagon. I've seen friends with vertebrae sticking out from under their skin b/c they "felt great" being thinner (and thinner and thinner and thinner). It's scary, and hard to know what to say when you genuinely fear for someone, yet aren't trying to suggest they be your size.

    Another commenter mentioned your BMI and where 10 lbs will put you, so I won't belabor that point. However, may I also recommend (assuming you have medical insurance) asking a doc for a strictly medical evaluation? Not because anything's wrong, just to get some unbiased perspective on where you are, and where you want to go, now that you're in the fine-tuning phase.

    Regardless, super job on your loss - congratulations! You've put in a lot of hard work, and I sincerely wish you continued good health and success :-)
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Listen to yourself.

    What are your goals?