Thanks.. I think..?

2»

Replies

  • krista2131
    krista2131 Posts: 33 Member
    I wouldn't give him the time of day since he made you look non existent not that long ago. I would rather be with someone or talk to people who liked me before and after weight loss than just when I lost weight. If he wasn't interested before than he is more about looks and that is not a guy you want to be with.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I think your reaction was a bit over-the-top. "Don't tell so-and-so" was meant to be a joke. As in, so-and-so might get jealous. Which is probably his motives for messaging you in the first place.

    You should have just kindly accepted the compliment and moved along. Honestly, you really shouldn't have bothered to tell so-and-so because why should she care what he thinks of your appearance. You kind of played into his game by telling her. I'm sure he didn't expect the reaction that he got, but he was hoping that you would tell her that he showed some interest in you. Or that you would take interest in him and tell her.
  • My 18-year-old daughter and I were talking about this very subject just this morning. Fortunately I'm married and don't have to deal with this very often, but I remember enough about my dating days to give her advice. I may be odd, but I prefer a guy to get to know me before he comments on my looks. There's SO MUCH MORE to me than what a person can glean from the surface. My daughter feels the same way, but that could be just because I raised her that way. Don't get me wrong, she's beautiful, but in our house comments about people's kindness, intelligence, thoughtfulness, talents, capability etc are bandied about MUCH more frequently than comments about looks. Therefore, comments from someone you barely know about your looks, though they may be well-meant, are very off-putting. Add to that the crazy comment about "don't tell our mutual friend that I've been after forever," frankly, it becomes somewhat disquieting. However, guys don't always get these social nuances and they tend to appreciate direct communication, so I think your response was exactly what was needed in the situation. Good for you! Also, good job on all your hard work!
  • ILoveTheBrowns
    ILoveTheBrowns Posts: 661 Member
    no
  • icywindow
    icywindow Posts: 33 Member
    I'm a guy, and I had a friend who was kind of drunk compliment me in front of his girlfriend saying "dude, you look awesome, I'd totally bang you." I knew what he meant by it (keep up the good work, man!), and it got me to laugh. Much different dynamic than your situation, though.