feeling down

MrsBishop05
MrsBishop05 Posts: 7
in Getting Started
I guess today is my official kick off to shedding 100lbs. I never thought I'd allow myself to get this big but I have and I am just so tired of it. The problem im having is that after eating oatmeal in the morning, a green smoothie for snack. I find myself obessing over a croissant my husband bought for himself. I kept walking back ans forth fighting the urge to eat it. Ginally I couldn't take it anymore... I ate two. Im not trying to be extremely strict with my intake but the fact that I couldnt resist the urge makes me feel like such a failure and maybe the reality is that I just dont have the will to do this. I'm not quite sure why Im posting this, I guess just to vent. Its to embarrassing to discuss this with anyone in my life.

Replies

  • jennibutch577
    jennibutch577 Posts: 1
    Oh I know how you feel! I am trying to lose around 30 and I find that my mind just goes into food mode and all I can think about is what (and when) I am going to eat. I think that I do ok at work but as soon as I walk in the door at home I am making a bee line to the fridge! by then I am so hungry or obsessed that I don't even stop and think I just chow down. I think the first step is realizing my thought pattern and trying to not let myself get to the point where I am so hungry that I over do it at home. your not a failure, think of this as a fluid thing, its going to shift; and the first step is just knowing what you are eating. I had a big problem with mindless eating.
  • runawayescape
    runawayescape Posts: 58 Member
    It's not the end of the world! It's okay to have the things you like just in moderation, so next time you crave something fit it into your cals :)
  • bstevens1021
    bstevens1021 Posts: 33
    Restricting yourself so stringently is one of the biggest reasons why "diets" fail. Don't completely eliminate things you want to eat, just eat a smaller portion of them. If you'd eaten half a croissant when you wanted it, you might not have eaten two later when your desire for them had become obsessive. Not saying that to be critical, it's just one of the lessons I've learned along the way.

    It's hard when you get so overweight because you desperately want all that excess weight to be gone, but it takes time. You didn't gain all that weight in a few weeks, so you're not going to lose it that fast either. Do small goals and celebrate your accomplishments when you meet them. If you look at the long-term goal and see how far you are from it, it will demoralize you.

    If you want support, feel free to friend me. I'm always good for encouragement mixed with realism mixed with a little bit of tough love. ;)
  • Sreneesa
    Sreneesa Posts: 1,170 Member
    I'm not sure if you started exercising or not, but I find that an exercise routine can help keep you on track as well.

    As the poster said, stay within your daily calories/macros and exercise.

    If you are at home right now and not busy, go for a walk. Or go on youtube and find a video. Do some jumping jacks. Anything to get you going and motivated. You may want to make a playlist for your walking or whatever exercise you choose.

    Don't beat yourself up. IT does nothing for your goals. Pick yourself up, smile, and keep it pushing!

    You gotta start somewhere.

    Good luck, you got this!
  • cally_
    cally_ Posts: 27 Member
    I personally dont do this, but my friend plans exactly what she is going to eat throughout the day and it seems to work for her - she even allows herself a treat every now and then. I know thats not always possible with working/family life but anyhow it's all about moderation! Tell your husband not to have more unhealthy food around you?
  • MrsBishop05
    MrsBishop05 Posts: 7
    You're right, I eat for entertainment! I need to readjust.
  • MrsBishop05
    MrsBishop05 Posts: 7
    Thank you, I'm trying not to get ao upset its just hard
  • editorgrrl
    editorgrrl Posts: 7,060 Member
    Log it accurately & honestly and move on. You don't have to be perfect, you just have to be good enough. We all make bad choices; once you start making more good choices than bad, you will start losing weight.

    One meal at a time. Get used to measuring & logging everything. Move more. You can do this. Fit in '14!
  • MrsBishop05
    MrsBishop05 Posts: 7
    You are completely right, eating half would have been the intelligent thing to do. Thanks for your comment it was very helpful
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    Making changes is always hard - and too many changes at once might be impossible.

    I think it's best to start out without changing your diet (in the sense of "food you normally eat," not "weird stuff you will give up as soon as you reach your goal"). Just log for a couple weeks. Use a food scale, and be honest: note down what you eat, how many calories it adds up to, and what your balance of macros (carbohydrates, protein, and fat) looks like.

    Then set MFP for a weight loss goal (I recommend no more than 1.5 lbs./week) and see what you need to change to meet your new calorie target. In my case, it was eating a smaller breakfast, cutting out chips or side dishes with lunch, and not having seconds at dinner. I also started cooking with somewhat fewer refined carbohydrates (sugars and starches) and more beans and vegetables. But I didn't make drastic changes.

    I agree with the poster who says it's about moderation. I like cheese, but now I have half an ounce or at most an ounce of cheese for dessert, instead of leaving the cheese on the table and taking multiple helpings. When I grill a steak, I cut it in half and put the rest away for later, instead of serving and eating it all. Basically, I am adapting my diet in ways I can live with the rest of my life.

    As long as you log accurately and honestly, and you meet your calorie goals, you will lose weight. It's hard - especially when you get hungry and people around you are eating - but it helps to think about the reason you're doing this.

    One thing to keep in mind, though, is that MFP often exaggerates exercise calories burned. If you use its estimates, start by "eating back" only 50-75% of the calories it estimates. You don't want to undereat, but a lot of people fail to lose weight because they think they are burning more in exercise than they are really doing.

    And as others have said, if you make a bad decision, don't beat yourself up about it. Try to figure out why you did it, and avoid doing it in the future if you can, but try to treat it as a problem to be solved, not as a moral failing.

    Good luck!
  • MrsBishop05
    MrsBishop05 Posts: 7
    No I haven't started working out, but im going to doing some videos ( im on maternity leave and have another child that's 14 months so its hard to get to gym at this current moment)
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    Oh and PS: The holidays are a really bad time to start major changes, because they take you out of your normal routine. I started last January 7, after getting back to my normal routine. Had I started just before New Year's Eve, I would have been pretty disappointed.
  • MrsBishop05
    MrsBishop05 Posts: 7
    Oh and PS: The holidays are a really bad time to start major changes, because they take you out of your normal routine. I started last January 7, after getting back to my normal routine. Had I started just before New Year's Eve, I would have been pretty disappointed.
    Lol true but I have absolutely no holiday plans so its just like any other week for me
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    sounds like you've restricted your calories too much. stick to MFP guidelines or do the TDEE -10% method.

    there's no reason to restrict your calories that much where you'd only be getting around 300-400 calories per day for breakfast and lunch.

    also a croissant is around 250 -350 calories.considering that you have 100 pounds to lose, eating 2 croissants in addition to what you had for breakfast is still putting you well below your maintenance - low enough to lose, so stop freaking out
  • happydaze71
    happydaze71 Posts: 339 Member
    the holidays are THE worst time to try and make these changes, you are being so hard on yourself.
    That being said, I know exactly where you are coming from and I can tell how miserable and unhappy you are with yourself.

    So here's my advise.....
    Start by planning your meals..pre log. This helps me ALOT.
    Plan some exercise in your day.
    The minute you start feeling guilty and pressuring yourself to be perfect is the minute you will start sabotaging yourself.

    Be kind and be positive.
    There' s a lot of things I have realised about myself since becoming really serious about losing weight - that the meaner I am to myself (putting myself down, looking in the mirror and calling myself names etc) the more likely I am not to stick to anything and go on huge binges.
    Then I feel like a failure, which of course leads to more self hatred and more binging.
    Treat yourself like you are worth it - which of course you are.
  • Ke11er
    Ke11er Posts: 147 Member
    Log it and move forward....while you're there try loggin in all the foods you want to eat for tomorrow. Now then you have a customized plan just for you for tomorrow. Your choices, you're in control of it. Tomorrow you'll know exactly what snack you do have to look forward to... and can enjoy thinking about that and the successes you're accomplishing, instead of what's sitting in the kitchen?

    That said, it can be tough when a favorite treat is sitting around. Perhaps it would be a good idea to have a chat with your husband? Ask him if he will be supportive of your goals by not bringing home the less healthy foods you find tempting that don't fit into your plans. If not, be sure you keep favs around that you do want to eat...and make that plan beforehand :-)
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    sounds like you've restricted your calories too much. stick to MFP guidelines or do the TDEE -10% method.

    there's no reason to restrict your calories that much where you'd only be getting around 300-400 calories per day for breakfast and lunch.

    also a croissant is around 250 -350 calories.considering that you have 100 pounds to lose, eating 2 croissants in addition to what you had for breakfast is still putting you well below your maintenance - low enough to lose, so stop freaking out

    ^ This sounds about right to me. Maybe next time just go ahead and have ONE croissant when you want it, so you don't build up so much stress and then binge when you finally give in to the craving. Don't give up your favorite foods, just eat less of them when you do eat them, and make them fit into your calories. I use exercise to earn extra calories when I want treats...:flowerforyou:
  • diadia1
    diadia1 Posts: 223 Member
    Making changes is always hard - and too many changes at once might be impossible.

    I think it's best to start out without changing your diet (in the sense of "food you normally eat," not "weird stuff you will give up as soon as you reach your goal"). Just log for a couple weeks. Use a food scale, and be honest: note down what you eat, how many calories it adds up to, and what your balance of macros (carbohydrates, protein, and fat) looks like.

    Then set MFP for a weight loss goal (I recommend no more than 1.5 lbs./week) and see what you need to change to meet your new calorie target. In my case, it was eating a smaller breakfast, cutting out chips or side dishes with lunch, and not having seconds at dinner. I also started cooking with somewhat fewer refined carbohydrates (sugars and starches) and more beans and vegetables. But I didn't make drastic changes.

    I agree with the poster who says it's about moderation. I like cheese, but now I have half an ounce or at most an ounce of cheese for dessert, instead of leaving the cheese on the table and taking multiple helpings. When I grill a steak, I cut it in half and put the rest away for later, instead of serving and eating it all. Basically, I am adapting my diet in ways I can live with the rest of my life.

    As long as you log accurately and honestly, and you meet your calorie goals, you will lose weight. It's hard - especially when you get hungry and people around you are eating - but it helps to think about the reason you're doing this.

    One thing to keep in mind, though, is that MFP often exaggerates exercise calories burned. If you use its estimates, start by "eating back" only 50-75% of the calories it estimates. You don't want to undereat, but a lot of people fail to lose weight because they think they are burning more in exercise than they are really doing.

    And as others have said, if you make a bad decision, don't beat yourself up about it. Try to figure out why you did it, and avoid doing it in the future if you can, but try to treat it as a problem to be solved, not as a moral failing.

    Good luck!

    nice post and advice.
    exactly how i think: this is not a diet this is a lifestyle.
    So if you don't expect to cut something you like for forever (which you won't), then don't . Just allows it in your daily macros.
    I eat chocolate everyday bc i just can't live without it!!! But i make sure i fit into my macro.

    And start by small goals. Just doing better healthy food choices is already is a huge step in that direction.

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