Concearned over teens eating habits.

Not sure what forum to put this under. My 15yo has always been a bad eater. I cook dinner every night and pack her lunch every day and she barely eats what's offered. I hardly buy any snack foods anymore either. She earns her own momy and buys junk food in the cafeteria, and walks to the drugstore with her friend to buy junk. It seems like the friend she spends the most time with and her just watch tv and binge eat. Last night for NYE her friend slept over. As a treat I got them a brownie Sunday to share and some mcdonalds becuase I have 4 kids and it was a holiday and that is what they wanted. During the night the girls ate a bag of frozen French fries, a loaf of garlic bread, and finished off the chips and dip I got for the rest of the family. I purposely did not have sweets in the house and those would of been gone as well. I have 4 kids and don't think it's fair that I cannot keep some junk like garlic bread and frozen French fries for last minute crazy nights, but it seems that what it might come to.
Thankfully my daughter is not over weight and plays competitive soccer though she said she won try out for the highschool team.
After reading people's stories some are upset becuase their parents were too strict with food and other angry nobody helped them when they were kids.
I try to take the approach of being healthy and keep the focus off of weight. I almost want to tell her she cannot spend time with this friend until she does things with other friends. I am really lost on this one.

Replies

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    I don't have a teen, but I'd say, keep doing what you're doing and offering healthy food, the rest is out of your hands really. She's not overweight, so she's probably ok as long as she's active... When she starts gaining weight if she stops soccer, maybe she'll be more receptive then.
  • uconnwinsnc
    uconnwinsnc Posts: 1,054 Member
    As long as she is active, teens can eat and eat and eat and generally won't put on weight. Once they start sitting around they'll get fat.
  • einsteins2013
    einsteins2013 Posts: 20 Member
    We have a 15 yo that eats constantly. We cannot figure out where she puts all the food. She eats a combination of .... everything! We try to keep the junk food to a minimum but, she too has her own money. She is thin as a rail, and does gymnastics once a week. I worry more about the amount of sodium she takes in more than I do the calories. We work out a lot at home and when we are rowing or riding the bike, or strength training she will lay on the floor or across a chair and do crunches and v-ups.
    We all wish that we had her metabolism and hope for her sake it doesn't change anytime soon!

    Just when we thought no kid could possibly eat as much as she does, we fed her boy friend for the first time. He is 16 and plays varsity sports at their high school. Boy were we wrong..... OMG!!! You should see him eat! It must be a teenage thing.
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,149 Member
    1. What do you classify as "junk food"?
    2. Why are you restricting/keeping "junk food" out of your house?
  • JoshuaL86
    JoshuaL86 Posts: 403 Member
    Your kids are smoking pot! Lol, jk.
  • aubyshortcake
    aubyshortcake Posts: 796 Member
    We have a 15 yo that eats constantly. We cannot figure out where she puts all the food. She eats a combination of .... everything! We try to keep the junk food to a minimum but, she too has her own money. She is thin as a rail, and does gymnastics once a week. I worry more about the amount of sodium she takes in more than I do the calories. We work out a lot at home and when we are rowing or riding the bike, or strength training she will lay on the floor or across a chair and do crunches and v-ups.
    We all wish that we had her metabolism and hope for her sake it doesn't change anytime soon!

    Just when we thought no kid could possibly eat as much as she does, we fed her boy friend for the first time. He is 16 and plays varsity sports at their high school. Boy were we wrong..... OMG!!! You should see him eat! It must be a teenage thing.

    I definitely think the teenage thing help lol, when I was a teenager I remember having 21 chicken wings for dinner one night. Also my frequent lunch in school was a double order of fries dipped in ranch dressing, and this was during a time that I was pretty thin. It was only 10 years ago but there is no way in hell I could eat like that now and get away with it lol
  • LishieFruit89
    LishieFruit89 Posts: 1,956 Member
    1. What do you classify as "junk food"?
    2. Why are you restricting/keeping "junk food" out of your house?

    This.
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
    I have the opposite question. If garlic bread and french fries are fine for 'crazy nights' then they sound fine for a crazy sleepover, eh? Sometimes teens pig out. I think it can turn into a problem, but not letting her hang out with that friend is not the way to handle it, imho.

    Have the girls make sweet potato chips with you next sleepover maybe. Teach both of them how to make better food! Make it fun. Or at least make it a requirement of sleeping over, lol. Those kinds of rules you can set and not be too out there, imho.
  • Teens are growing and are generally more active than you'd think, leave her be unless it affects her health
  • psmd
    psmd Posts: 764 Member
    I had a friend in middle school who would binge and starve herself in between. Later she told me she was bulemic. Sorry but that's the first thought I had when I read your post. I would at least want to make sure that's not the issue. Good luck!!
  • la8ydi
    la8ydi Posts: 294 Member
    French fries and garlic bread and you're freaking out? Teens can and will eat more "junk" food than adults. Although I'd be more concerned if she were eating cake and cookies and was overweight. My teen daughter eats twice as much as I do - and some of the craziest combinations - but she's a dancer and she works it all off. We talk about (and I offer) "healthier" choices...but as a teenager, I let her make her own decisions. Once she had a sleep over with 5 teen girls - they ate 4 boxes of cereal, a dozen donuts, a box of microwave popcorn and a big barrel of cheese balls. All in the name of fun. It's all ok. Just keep an eye on her...but not your thumb or she will rebel.
  • keepongoingnmw
    keepongoingnmw Posts: 371 Member
    1. What do you classify as "junk food"?
    2. Why are you restricting/keeping "junk food" out of your house?

    This.
    I never used to,
    If I go to costco and buy a box of 40 granola bars they are gone in three days no exaggeration. Same with any sugary or starchy snack foods. The thee kids fight becuase someone ate most and and another only had one. And then the dinners I cook are untouched. My kids won't eat a healthy dinner if they are full from granola and cheezits So we decided to save junk food and treats for weekends. We pick a few things amongst us and enjoy them.
  • keepongoingnmw
    keepongoingnmw Posts: 371 Member
    French fries and garlic bread and you're freaking out? Teens can and will eat more "junk" food than adults. Although I'd be more concerned if she were eating cake and cookies and was overweight. My teen daughter eats twice as much as I do - and some of the craziest combinations - but she's a dancer and she works it all off. We talk about (and I offer) "healthier" choices...but as a teenager, I let her make her own decisions. Once she had a sleep over with 5 teen girls - they ate 4 boxes of cereal, a dozen donuts, a box of microwave popcorn and a big barrel of cheese balls. All in the name of fun. It's all ok. Just keep an eye on her...but not your thumb or she will rebel.
    The problem is what she is not eating, like any protein fruits and vegetables. If she ate normal dinners I would not care about it so much but she doesn't.
    I also would not mind it on occasion but it is a regular thing.
  • becky10rp
    becky10rp Posts: 573 Member
    I have the opposite problem; I have a 15 year old and she's a recovering anorexic. Thankfully - with therapy - she's doing better than she was 2 years ago.

    A few key ideas:

    - make your teen help you with the grocery list - so THEY pick the meals (guide them so they pick healthy choices)
    - have your teen help you prepare the meals - this also gets them involved
    - don't keep a lot of 'junk food' in your house - stock up on grapes, clementines - stuff your teen can snack on - but that are healthy. I have a hot-air popcorn popper - my daughter loves to use it; and they sell all sorts of flavored powders you can sprinkle over the popcorn

    AND - remember - your teen WILL eat some junk food - that (unfortunately) is part of being a teen. Don't condemn it - just keep healthy snacks at your home.
  • keepongoingnmw
    keepongoingnmw Posts: 371 Member
    I have the opposite problem; I have a 15 year old and she's a recovering anorexic. Thankfully - with therapy - she's doing better than she was 2 years ago.

    A few key ideas:

    - make your teen help you with the grocery list - so THEY pick the meals (guide them so they pick healthy choices)
    - have your teen help you prepare the meals - this also gets them involved
    - don't keep a lot of 'junk food' in your house - stock up on grapes, clementines - stuff your teen can snack on - but that are healthy. I have a hot-air popcorn popper - my daughter loves to use it; and they sell all sorts of flavored powders you can sprinkle over the popcorn

    AND - remember - your teen WILL eat some junk food - that (unfortunately) is part of being a teen. Don't condemn it - just keep healthy snacks at your home.
    So sorry you went through this and glad she is better. I guess the real issue I have is her not eating healthy foods.
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,149 Member
    1. What do you classify as "junk food"?
    2. Why are you restricting/keeping "junk food" out of your house?

    This.
    I never used to,
    If I go to costco and buy a box of 40 granola bars they are gone in three days no exaggeration. Same with any sugary or starchy snack foods. The thee kids fight becuase someone ate most and and another only had one. And then the dinners I cook are untouched. My kids won't eat a healthy dinner if they are full from granola and cheezits So we decided to save junk food and treats for weekends. We pick a few things amongst us and enjoy them.

    So you're upset that your kids a) eat like vacuum cleaners, and b) don't eat what you want them to eat? Is that right, or am I reading into it too much? Have you thought about why your kids want to eat that stuff?

    I'm no help then. My parents only concern was that I survived to adulthood and stayed out of prison, not whether I ate all my veggies.
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    I was a competitive soccer player in high school.

    I pretty much ate whatever I wanted.

    When I got to college and stopped moving as much, I put on weight. Then, I started watching what I was eating and found the gym on campus.

    Leave her alone, she's a kid and she's just fine. The more you attempt to control her eating habits, the more likely she is to revolt and resent you.

    Provide healthy options, but she will do what she wants to do.
  • XjXannX
    XjXannX Posts: 44 Member
    Saying she can't hangout with a specific friend for no real reason at all isn't going to do anything but make her rebel more
  • aschroeder2749
    aschroeder2749 Posts: 172 Member
    This is a tricky one. My parents never had pre packed foods or soda in our home when I was growing up. As a result, two things happened:

    1) Once I left the home, I gleefully gorged on everything I wasn't allowed to have growing up. Thankfully, wisdom and age changed that, and I only ate like that for about 4 years after leaving my parents' home.
    2) At almost 29 years of age, I have beautiful teeth and have never had a cavity; I attribute a lot of that to not growing up with sugary snacks and sodas.

    I believe a balance is best. Kids crave what they don't have.
  • FattyFatsoMcTubby
    FattyFatsoMcTubby Posts: 170 Member
    I was a competitive soccer player in high school.

    I pretty much ate whatever I wanted.

    When I got to college and stopped moving as much, I put on weight. Then, I started watching what I was eating and found the gym on campus.

    Leave her alone, she's a kid and she's just fine. The more you attempt to control her eating habits, the more likely she is to revolt and resent you.

    Provide healthy options, but she will do what she wants to do.

    ^^^ I agree. I raised 3 daughters, the youngest is a junior in college now. If they're active, they need the calories. It would be nice if they ate "healthy" calories, but how much control do we have as parents? They will eat what they want when they aren't home. Until she starts drinking, doing drugs, getting bad grades, or getting in other trouble, leave her alone. If she starts gaining weight, you will have an opportunity talk to her about eating better with a slight chance she will listen. Good luck.
  • keepongoingnmw
    keepongoingnmw Posts: 371 Member
    Saying she can't hangout with a specific friend for no real reason at all isn't going to do anything but make her rebel more
    I know an over reaction on my part. I never said anything to her about it.

    So I am over reacting. Besides a cereal selection I do keep most snack foods out just becuase of the problems it causes with sneaking and fighting over it. There are plenty of choices like yogurt fruit cheese ect. Thank you.
  • TAMayorga
    TAMayorga Posts: 341 Member
    If part of the problem is that she is getting more than her fair share of the packaged snacks (like granola bars), you could try divvying them up as soon as you get home. Each kid gets a zip-loc bag with their name on it and their share of the snacks. Hopefully she won't raid her siblings' stash.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    I have talked to my kids about their "friends" and it shed light on what they were thinking and feeling. It may also help your daughter realize that this behavior is not good. When I was in school, I had a friend whose parents were divorced. Her mother had some eating issues and when ever she visited her she came back with issues herself. Luckily at 16, she was able to say she did not want to see her mother anymore but she still struggled with eating problems.