374 lbs to 250! 115 lb. Loss

Taking accountability is one of the hardest things anyone can do when it comes to taking care of your body and trying to lose weight.

I learned this the hard way. For years I blamed my weight gain on a number of things. Stress, was my number one response ususally.Granted, I do live a very stressful life because of my career choice and the people I have surrounded myself with in the past, couple that with huge life changing situations and bad circumstances...well lets just say, I would have checked myself in somewhere if it didnt cease.

there was a time where I could sit and eat a large sub, 2 slices of pizza, french fries and a coke for just dinner. then maybe later finish it off with a large bag of cheeto puffs. My go to was, I had a really bad day, I deserve to binge. Or Im emotion eating , I would tell my husband.

But after a while, when I was breathing heavy trying to walk up the stairs to my room , or even to sometimes get dressed...I began to wonder about how my health was really holding up. My hair was looking oiley, my skin was full of acne, none of my clothes fit...I guess I really didnt feel like me anymore. where was the bright faced girl I knew 8 years ago? This isnt her face. this isnt her body. I know with age you change, but I just wasnt the same. there was no bounce in my step, no swagger in my walk. I was just the chubby girl, falling deeper and deeper into a weight based depression.

the first time in a long time I actually looked at my appearance, honestly I was mortified. The stretch marks plaguing my skin and the rolls of pudge that cropped over on pretty much all sides of my jeans sent me to tears. But It was something I had to deal with.

After two failed pregnanices and not much too look forward to in that stage of my life, I thought to myself, What else do I have besides myself? I have to live with this body. This shell. I have to look at it eveyday, spend time with it, think in it, breath. Is this how I want to spend my life? Is this who I want to be stuck with? No.

the next week I went to my doctor and got on the dreaded scale. I weight just over 374 pounds. It was mortifying and gratifying at the same time. While the number was shocking, since i hadn't weighed myself in two years , i was relieved to know that it was fixable. That it wouldn't be easy...but that i had a start off point, and there was no where else for me to go but down.



I stopped rewarding my sorrow with food and replaced it with yoga.

I stopped binging in front of the TV feeling sorry for myself.

I stopped making excuses. Period. either you are comitted or you arent.

There isnt an in between. You cant half *kitten* it. If you half *kitten* it, then you aren't committed you are just going through the motions.

Being committed means that even if you had a bad day, you get your *kitten* to the gym and you pound it out on that treadmill.Or you find a way to work out.

Being committed means that you give your all, 100% of the time, no matter the circumstances.



Being committed means knowing that you ****ed up and owning it.

I owned every single one of my eating and fitness faults from that point on. Sure, It took a little while to get used to thinking this way, but Ever since , there has been no doubt in my mind that I can and will reach my goals.

the sky is the limit my friends.

I went from 374 - 250lbs and am continuing to strengthen my body and lose weight every day.