This is for the birds!!!

Ahmee2034
Ahmee2034 Posts: 1,330 Member
in Motivation and Support
Of course, it's a new year and, of course, I find myself back on MFP to start yet another "time to finally get healthy" year!!!! I wonder who I think I'm kidding. Oh, yeah, wait a minute, that would be ME!!! My cholesterol levels are at an all time high, I'm nearly 200 pounds...NEVER been this big. My back muscles hurt standing at the zinc washing dishes!!! Why can't I get motivated and STAY motivated??!!!! I really am tired of feeling like this and I know if I can drop those 60 pounds again I would be amazing!!!!!!

Even my doctors have given up on me. I tried talking to them and asking them for help, etc. and one simply rolled his eyes and told me, "Get a pair of walking shoes and start walking!" and walked out of the room. I feel SO defeated. I'm not usually this much of a Negative Nina but 2013 kicked my *kitten*. My son is still suffering from a broken neck as a result of an auto accident when he was 17, my husband's job is stressing US out! I just can't commit. I don't know if I can pick myself up this time...

Replies

  • anthony438
    anthony438 Posts: 578 Member
    YOU

    CAN

    DO

    THIS!!!!!

    This is your year, make the best of it.

    At times it may seem that the whole world has given up on you, but no matter what, do not EVER give up on yourself
  • mamma_nee
    mamma_nee Posts: 809 Member
    YES YOU CAN !
  • LizTyre
    LizTyre Posts: 3
    I know how you feel. I restart every 4 or 5 months and just stop. I can't believe you have such jerk docs! I am a horrible procrastinator. My attitude was always " I'll get to it tomorrow" But ultimately, It's your frame of mind that makes it or breaks it. If you need a motivation buddy you can add me! I just started on here, again, yesterday, but this time I am Determined to achieve my goals! Nothing will stand in my way this time! And they only thing standing in the way of yours is you. And only you can fix it, but I'm happy to help! :) You CAN do it!
  • GadgetGuy2
    GadgetGuy2 Posts: 291 Member
    Hmmm......"This is for the birds!!!" implies you don't think weight control is for you.

    Could it be that the lack of fitness in your life is just not bad enough yet for you to do something about it?

    A subject like "why can't I succeed at weight control" is a positive way of stating that you are committed, trying, and realize you are not succeeding. "for the birds" makes it sound like you are throwing in the towel, like you have in the past per your post.
  • Fitnin6280
    Fitnin6280 Posts: 618 Member
    YOU CAN DO IT! It is NOT easy, but you are strong! Right!?
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    i thought we were talking blue jays, cardinals
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    You know, something that really helped me was having someone ask me "how come your last diet didn't work out?". This was my best friend and we have these open honest conversations but I was still a bit taken aback at first and basiclaly blew it off with a "the past is the past" reaction. But I couldn't get it out of my mind and found myself really trying to come up with a good reason and after a while, I finally did... DEPRIVATION!

    Every "diet" I'd been on before involved cutting out foods I loved AND cutting way down on portions. And sure it'd last for a few months but then the cravings start kicking in and as a foodie, it just got depressing so I'd give up and get fatter again. This time I promised myself no more deprivation. I would eat the foods I love, just cut down on portions and make some healthy swaps and it's worked pretty damn well so far!! I've been at it for 4 years now and although I've got a little longer to go, I can honestly say this is the lightest and healthiest I've been since I was 18 and I can't see ever going back.

    I think it's the same thing that happens to most of us - we try to live off rabbit food and diet food because that's what people always tell you to do PLUS workout and get all sweaty and sore and it doesn't take long for all of that to get exhausting.

    Instead, make small gradual changes. Be proud of each small goal you reach. Sure it'll take a little longer to lose the weight but I bet you'll be less likely to give up and won't have to start over again. :)

    Good luck!
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    "Get a pair of walking shoes and start walking!"

    That's the way I started. So can you, if you want it enough. So, the question is "do you want it enough???"
  • GadgetGuy2
    GadgetGuy2 Posts: 291 Member
    You know, something that really helped me was having someone ask me "how come your last diet didn't work out?". This was my best friend and we have these open honest conversations but I was still a bit taken aback at first and basiclaly blew it off with a "the past is the past" reaction. But I couldn't get it out of my mind and found myself really trying to come up with a good reason and after a while, I finally did... DEPRIVATION!

    Every "diet" I'd been on before involved cutting out foods I loved AND cutting way down on portions. And sure it'd last for a few months but then the cravings start kicking in and as a foodie, it just got depressing so I'd give up and get fatter again. This time I promised myself no more deprivation. I would eat the foods I love, just cut down on portions and make some healthy swaps and it's worked pretty damn well so far!! I've been at it for 4 years now and although I've got a little longer to go, I can honestly say this is the lightest and healthiest I've been since I was 18 and I can't see ever going back.

    I think it's the same thing that happens to most of us - we try to live off rabbit food and diet food because that's what people always tell you to do PLUS workout and get all sweaty and sore and it doesn't take long for all of that to get exhausting.

    Instead, make small gradual changes. Be proud of each small goal you reach. Sure it'll take a little longer to lose the weight but I bet you'll be less likely to give up and won't have to start over again. :)

    Good luck!

    ^----This.
    Note the positive attitude. Note the self examination resulting in an understanding that a slight calorie deficit will lead to weight loss without having to feel like you are starving.

    Good luck....OP. Attitude.....then technique (like the quoted poster here).
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    Nobody can do this but you. Nobody can do it for you either. Motivation comes from within. At some point, you're going to have an "AHA moment" where you decide you just can't do this anymore.

    In April 2011, I went to a school event with my daughter. I could barely walk to the door from the parking lot - had to stop multiple times to catch my breath - and once inside the door, I had to sit on the floor because I was so out of breath and out of shape. I was humiliated and mortified that I had to do that, and had the nerve to blame the staff for making me walk so far. It was then that I decided something had to change.

    Fast forward to 2013. 2013 was both a good year and a bad year for me. I lost 115 pounds, and had surgery to remove extra skin from my belly. That part was GREAT. What sucked was that my recovery didn't go as well as I would have liked, and my dad passed away from battling cancer. I've actually gained back some of what I lost.

    Life always happens when you make other plans. I'm finally sick and tired of the scale going the "wrong way."

    My suggestion to you would be to get in touch with a dietician to help you get on the right track with what you're eating. Be willing to consider seeing a therapist (A bariatric doctor's office can help you find one). Be willing to join a group (either Weight Watchers, Overeaters Anonymous, or even start a group of your own). And most importantly, be willing to take small steps. Today, drink more water. If you buy your breakfast on the way to work, try bringing something like yogurt and fruit to work. Just keep adding small things to the list when you're ready - when it's "not as scary" to say, "Okay.....I'm okay with the water now (8 ea. 8oz. glasses/day); I'm now having yogurt and fruit for breakfast. Is there something I can add to this that won't completely freak me out? How about taking a lap around the office every 2 hours?"

    Good luck!!!
  • 20ever
    20ever Posts: 125 Member
    “If I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”

    - Gandhi


    “When the world says, ‘Give up’, Hope whispers, ‘Try it one more time.’”

    - Unknown
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    "Get a pair of walking shoes and start walking!"

    That's the way I started. So can you, if you want it enough. So, the question is "do you want it enough???"

    This^^ It also relieves stress and lets me clear my mind. When I first started I could barely walk a mile in 20 minutes. Now I am even starting to jog a little and hope to be running a mile this summer. break it into small things you can do easily and build from there. Try to forget the big goal because sometimes it seems sooooo far away why even bother trying.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    "Get a pair of walking shoes and start walking!"

    That's the way I started. So can you, if you want it enough. So, the question is "do you want it enough???"


    This!!

    I basically walked my way from 307 down to 262 before I joined MFP and calorie-counted my way to 203. For me that's a big deal as this is the lightest I've been since 8th grade. Still going, of course.

    That 104 lb loss also happened (over ~4 years) while dealing with generalized anxiety disorder, managing a stressful job, a loveless marriage, spouse's health problems, parents' health problems (some life-threatening), an EF-5 tornado destroying my home and all of my possessions, a major move, home purchase, sick pet, a divorce, several terrible jobs as I struggled to find a good fit, another move, new relationship, marriage, loss of a family member to cancer. AND another major life event I don't care to speak about here which was pretty difficult to get through.

    I'm not trying to sound heartless or unsympathetic. But job stress, injured family member...that stuff's rough but it is not an excuse to overeat or stagnant in your health habits. In fact, improving one's diet can help with stress. I wish you all the best!!
  • april1445
    april1445 Posts: 334
    Make a commitment that you can keep. Maybe it's coming on here every day, even if you don't log. Just to get motivation. It sounds like you need to make yourself a priority. It's vey hard for some people, but nobody wins if you don't take care of yourself.
  • jodycoady
    jodycoady Posts: 598 Member
    Your first paragraph was almost like I wrote it myself!

    Add me if you'd like. Ideally, I need to lose 25 lbs...

    I'd type more but I have an 8 month old to tend to :)
  • Stripeness
    Stripeness Posts: 511 Member
    "Get a pair of walking shoes and start walking!"

    That's the way I started. So can you, if you want it enough. So, the question is "do you want it enough???"

    +10!

    You don't even need to buy special shoes. Just wear whatever sneakers/tennies you already have.

    Remember the pre-flight instructions you're given on airplanes? Put your own mask on first, so you can be there for others. Forget "working out" or "dieting."

    Take a small sanity break and walk around your block. Look at the sky, trees, whatever's around you. Anything you do is more than what you're doing now, and you'll be better prepared to deal with your stresses.

    When you're ready, log your food. Just log it. Probably won't take long before you can see some small easy changes to make. Read or re-read: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    Breathe. Walk. You've got this.
  • darlilama
    darlilama Posts: 794 Member
    Don't think of it as "I have to lose 60 lbs!" That can sound overwhelming. Start by making small changes, setting attainable short-term goals (lose 5 lbs). Do a little exercise... if it's 5 or 10 minutes of walking, that's great. If it's 10 situps and you're done for, whatever. Just keep at it. Small changes can make a difference. WiIl you lose 60 lbs with just small changes.... probaby not, but you may lose 10 lbs. And that may make you want to make a few more changes in addition to the ones you've already done, and maybe you'll lose another 5 lbs. So, on and so forth.

    Changing your diet to consist of mostly healthful foods... even if you don't try to eat less volume...can improve your overall health.

    Think real, do-able, and short-term. You CAN do that. See where it goes.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    "Get a pair of walking shoes and start walking!"

    That's the way I started. So can you, if you want it enough. So, the question is "do you want it enough???"

    To elaborate, I started walking a couple of blocks several times a week. It took me about 30 minutes to walk a mile. After about 6 weeks of walking, I could walk a 20min mile without feeling winded or sore. So I started adding about 1/4mile to my walking route every couple of weeks. Fast forward one year...

    Walking is my escape from work, the house, the husband. It is my time for me, listening to some energizing music, walking the dog, feeling strong and confident and alive.

    I can now walk/hike 6 miles in 90 minutes. A "short walk" in the evening is 2.7miles in about 40mins. I have lost 34lbs (from 232 to 198), lost inches in my hips and thighs, and feel so much better. Best of all, I feel good about myself! I feel strong, confident, alive and (dare I say "sexy") when I walk. I have completed a 5K and am training for a 10K in April. Pretty damn awesome for someone who got winded walking up the 3 steps to her front porch.

    Take your doctor's advice. Just start walking - you will be amazed by what can happen when you lace up and put one foot in front of the other.
  • Ahmee2034
    Ahmee2034 Posts: 1,330 Member
    Thank you all for your wise advice. Everything said here is true. I have to accept the things I cannot change but make no excuses for the things I can! I have a renewed commitment to a HEALTHIER lifestyle, not a "dieting" lifestyle. I actually walked for about 30 minutes today AND from cutting calories all week and eating healthy, I lost a couple pounds. Thank you all and I look forward to sharing my successes with y'all.
  • FitnFeistyLyness
    FitnFeistyLyness Posts: 757 Member
    someone out there somewhere is doing what it takes to get what they want and what you want are you willing to do what it takes?

    you have to start..

    its not easy..
    when i weighed 370 pounds it wasnt easy to take that first step.. check out my profile now..im 165.. still working on me

    i dont give up ever.. i may fall, but i will always get back up.. the only one that can hold you down is you

    so get out of you way and do it!

    stop thinking, stop procrastinating. start today!

    you are worth it..
    we each are,
    trust me the journey is not always easy and there will be hills and obstacle to climb, run, jump, but the journey is worth taking because its your life,

    your here for a reason.. you want to do this or you wouldnt have joined.. so why wait?

    whats stopping you.. look in the mirror.. that girl is the only one stopping you.. the girl inside of you is screaming to get out..

    are you going to set her free or you going to keep her trapped up. thinking about doing it instead of taking action..

    you can do anything you set your mind to.

    i have a group if anyone wants to join me..

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/18785-motivation-support-and-accountability

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