Nervous

dontdomornings92
dontdomornings92 Posts: 47 Member
in Getting Started
I'm already quite small at 5'3 and 127lbs but I really want to lose a little bit of weight just to feel better about myself. I used to be around 110lbs but over the past couple of years I have steadily been gaining weight and I just want to nip it in the butt before my weight climbs any higher. I want to start working out but I am really afraid to tell my family and friends because I am afraid of what they might think or say. I feel like every time I mention anything about my working out I get comment like "but you are already real skinny", if that's the reactions I get talking about working out I can only imagine what they would say if I mentioned wanting to lose a little bit of weight... Plus I feel like if I mention that I want to lose weight to someone who weighs more than me, then i'll be like a slap in the face to them...

Ultimately I want to get back down to 110lbs, but I am not sure that goal is realistic. To get to my goal I'd have to lose 17lbs and that makes me nervous because I've never really felt the need to lose weight until now and 17lbs just seem like a lot to lose, especially for someone who's already coincided to be "tiny". Plus, I feel like if I lose too much weight that my friends and family will start to question me. I guess I'll start by losing 10lbs and see how I feel after that.

The thing is though, I don't feel as tiny as everyone else seems to think that I am. In fact, people often think I weigh far more than I do, and that bothers me. I really just want to lose weight so that I look better in a bikini, and so my clothes fit better, and so I can feel more comfortable in my own skin.

What are your thoughts on this? Does anyone else feel the same way, or am I just completely crazy?

Replies

  • Ladyluna39
    Ladyluna39 Posts: 17
    I can completely relate! I am 5'4, and was about 117. I wanted to get down to about 113 so my clothes would fit better because after five kids and pushing 40, I had gained a little. I decided last February to start insanity, and I initially lost and hit my goal, but then I gained and I am up to about 121. I think it is all muscle because I am super toned, and my clothes do fit better, at least most of them. People don't believe I have actually gained weight. If you approach it as " I am working on my health" people may be less critical.
  • dontdomornings92
    dontdomornings92 Posts: 47 Member
    I mean another reason I am nervous is because for one thing, nobody in my immediate family is health conscience really at all. A few years ago one of my best friends lost quite a bit of weight because of a medication she was on. My family was always talking about it and talking about how thin she was getting, how she was unhealthy (she wasn't, she had a doctor monitoring her so they could alter her medication if necessary), and even questioning if she had an eating disorder (again, she didn't). I just don't want that same type of attention put onto me, if I do decided to lose just a little bit of weight.
  • journey_man
    journey_man Posts: 110 Member
    I am not a fan of glibly dishing "SCREW ANYONE ELSE, ONLY YOU matter" advice. We are not children. The opinions of our family, friends and loved ones should and do matter; it is disingenuous to pretend otherwise.

    Yet even so, I must say that you are getting tortured to an a exceptional degree by everyone else's opinion of what you do with your own body. You entire post is consumed with that concern.

    I don't think your goals are unreasonable. So find a way to be confident in what you want, and limit your discussions of your fitness goals with your loved ones. I suspect you shy from confrontation. Accordingly, if they ask about your activities, say you want to be fit and healthy. Don't mention your weight.
  • mniakm
    mniakm Posts: 12
    I hear your pain. BUT you should not care what anyone else thinks. If you want to be fitter (even if you are already so petite), that is totally your choice. Yes, you may be tiny, etc, but you know that you feel slightly overweight and YES, as you get older it gets harder to lose and easier to gain. I am not sure why but when you look at your parents, uncles, aunts, etc you will see that most of them are heavier than they were in their 20s or 30s. So, you are doing the right thing to try to lower your weight, and that too to an acceptable level. There is nothing wrong with you wanting to be healthier. Feel proud of yourself and understand that when others are saying your tiny, that is meant in a positive way, so take it as a compliment but trust your desire to be even better! You also know that you are not comfortable at that weight and you want to be a bit slimmer. So go for it!

    Don't be nervous, trust that the people that care for you will admire your commitment to your goal. Tell people that you want to be healthier, not skinnier and they will understand better. In our society, often people feel that when a person says they want to lose weight, they want to turn into a stick figure and basically starve themselves, but this is not the case for sound people. Sound people understand that being healthy is more important than the number listed on the scale. They understand that slower weight loss over a longer period of time is better and more permanent than losing weight rapidly. 17 pounds of weight does seem like a lot, but you can do it. Do it slowly, be steady and don't think of it as dieting, but rather as a positive lifestyle change. It is a good thing and best of luck!
  • healthygreek
    healthygreek Posts: 2,137 Member
    Working out is more for fitness and general good health rather than weightloss so I would express that I want to become healthier and stay that way rather than making it about weightloss which is really no ones business but your own.
    I am 5'2" and weigh 124-125 but I'd like to weigh 115-120 and I've worked out 6x a week for many years for health and fitness.
    I think everyone should move a lot n whatever way is enjoyable for them.

    Edited for spelling.
  • snacker127
    snacker127 Posts: 75 Member
    I totally get this. I’m the same height and my goal is 110. My max is/was 117, and I am currently 114. I almost never talk to other people about my weight because when I do, I have to pull the knives out of my back when I walk away. Just remember what a good friend of mine said once, “Pants can be tight at any size”. If I dare mention Fitness Pal I get “Yoooouuuuu count calories?” I just want to scream “Yes, and I work my butt off literally. That’s why I am the size I am. It’s not magic and I’m not lucky, I work hard.” I say go for it, if you get too thin for your frame, you will be able to tell by the reactions of the family that really know you.

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