Advice to help me help a friend!

RavenNevermore15
RavenNevermore15 Posts: 36 Member
edited February 11 in Health and Weight Loss
Hey all, need some advice and tips here. A dear friend of mine had a partial hysterectomy near the end of September 2013. Since then she's gained about 45 pounds and she was already slightly overweight. She's very upset and terribly depressed about the weight gain. I lost about 25 pounds for my wedding last year and I've offered to help her but am unsure of where to start!! She's a smoker also so she is going to quit that too. She is not on any medication or hormone replacement therapy and has been given the 'all clear' to start losing weight from her doctor. Any advice on what she and I should tackle first would be great. I was thinking of suggesting MFP for her to start tracking calories and to get her to at least start walking a few days a week. Thanks in advance for help folks!! :)

Replies

  • tracywintn
    tracywintn Posts: 79
    I would just wait for her to ask for your help---if you already offered it she knows you are willing. She may be dealing with depression and/or her hormones may be out of balance. She knows she is overweight and probably doesn't need you telling her what to do. Everyone has to come to this in their own time. When she is ready she will ask. That is just my opinion. I am sure you are very well intentioned but honestly-don't we all know to watch calories, eat healthy and exercise? Just let her know when she is ready you are 100% there for her in every way and leave it at that.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    She should quit smoking first (if she doesn't want to actively try to lose weight and quit smoking at the same time), as that is the biggest threat to her health right now.

    Definitely suggest MFP and help her to get moving, even if it's just a little.
  • RavenNevermore15
    RavenNevermore15 Posts: 36 Member
    Thanks for the posts. I should have clarified that she has already asked me for help. She wants me to help her get all the right tools together to start her fitness journey.

    She saw her doctor today and her doctor even suggested MFP or Lose It! to help her out. We are going walking tomorrow together. So far so good!
  • psuLemon
    psuLemon Posts: 38,459 MFP Moderator
    Tell her to sign up, set account to 1.5 lbs per week and work with her on general food education.. and maybe buy her a food scale to be more accurate. If she wants to start to exercise, then a combination of weight training and HIIT/cardio would be beneficial and allow you to eat more calories.
  • RavenNevermore15
    RavenNevermore15 Posts: 36 Member
    Food scale is a great idea! Thanks!! :) I definitely want to get her walking to build her cardio stamina while she's kicking the smoking habit. Some body weight moves for start and then show her the awesome world of HIIT. Thank you!
  • rockmama72
    rockmama72 Posts: 815 Member
    Awesome, both of you working together! I just quit smoking for the 100th time and it feels so good to take a deep breath. To help her (and yourself)... Be the driver for a few weeks. Insist on walks and workouts and carrots for snacks. You're a good friend!
  • namelesshere
    namelesshere Posts: 334 Member
    Suggesting MFP would be a good start as many do not know of its availability and lack of cost. :-) Then I think I would let her take the lead, but you could mention printing out food diaries if she wanted you to take a look. If she has asked for this help I would be more proactive than if this is something "I think" she should do. Weight loss is a personal journey and though you can be supportive, you can not make them do the work.
  • RavenNevermore15
    RavenNevermore15 Posts: 36 Member
    Rockmama72 awesome job quitting smoking! Been there before and it is TOUGH! I totally want to support her and baby steps to getting her on track. It can be really overwhelming at first, we all know that!

    Namelesshere I totally know what you mean. It's super personal but she has to know deep down that she is committed and ready for the change. Absolutely agree that I can't do it for her, she has to want it 1,000%. Thanks all!! =)
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