How do you deal with buffets with BED?

I have a binge eating disorder. On Wednesday,I binged over 5000 calories in one sitting. Not with good food though, it's never about the taste for me. It's just about consuming and filling up. (I filled up on kashi cereal, two family sized boxes along with fruits and almond milk). I'm trying to recover on my own and I've been doing well in the sense that I haven't binged like that for two weeks. I eat 1400 calories a day and I count my macros, I know i'm getting my nutrients. I'm 5 feet 8.5 inches and I weigh 151 pounds. Maybe more now since I binged. I know it seems stupid but that's a big accomplishment. Well, it was a big accomplishment.

There's a dinner on Saturday. It's at a buffet. I already binged this week. I don't know if I'll be able to handle another binge. I know it's mind over matter. That I can control. But when it comes to my binges, It's not about hunger. It's never about hunger. It's just about filling up and consuming as much as it takes to fill my stomach up. Taste is irrelevant. But I've been avoiding buffets for a year. I haven't had dinner with my family in a year. This is something I have to break. I need to stop being like this.

If you have BED, how do you handle buffets? How do you handle the urge?

Replies

  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    I don't have it but if I did I would ask my family to reconsider the buffet. I refuse to do buffets, if I have any input at all.

    Aren't you more likely to binge eating alone?
  • cnb165
    cnb165 Posts: 9
    They have a salad bar there and fruit. If you do binge do it on those.
  • I am starting to think i have it, but i'm not 100% sure..
    When it comes to buffets/family gatherings with food/big meals I think it's about planning ahead..
    Try to plan your meal and what items you are getting from the buffet and stay focused on what you had planned, maybe even calorie count them ahead of time. Stay focused on those items and then treat it like any other meal

    You are right it is mind over matter

    good luck!
  • grandmoo
    grandmoo Posts: 34 Member
    I, too, have BED and the only thing that works for me is to eat low carb. Whenever I've been faced with buffets, I can usually manage to find enough low(er) carb offerings to eat that won't set me up for a binge session. Since I've been lifting fairly heavy I've had to add back in some carbs, but not anything processed or starchy, just veggies and lower carb fruits. Otherwise, any carbs at all in the past have just been a slippery slope back to bingeing.

    I realize that won't help in the short run, but it might in the long run.

    Good luck!
  • I usually binge alone in my room. But when it comes to buffets or places where there's a lot of options and the "all you can eat" sign in there, the urge to binge overpowers my preference to eat alone.
  • I pre-log what I plan to eat at a buffet and write it on a sheet of paper. Then I take the paper with me and get ONLY what's on the paper. The checklist works for me to remind myself to be strong. I also tell everyone that I am with that I am only getting these things. Then I will feel too embarrassed to get anything extra, because then I will have to talk about it.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    I usually binge alone in my room. But when it comes to buffets or places where there's a lot of options and the "all you can eat" sign in there, the urge to binge overpowers my preference to eat alone.
    I mean this kindly because this breaks my heart and I know how easy it is to get this way about food, but do you think calorie counting might be contributing to the urge to binge? You're at a healthy weight. I'm pretty sure restricting does promote bingeing. Would you be less prone to binge if you 'loosened the collar' a bit?
  • I did pre log what I want to eat, I have the app in my phone. It's a sushi/Chinese buffet. I know sushi has a lot of calories even though it's a "diet" food. I'm thinking I'm going to stick with one cup of egg drop soup, a shrimp/veggie mix (spoonful), salad, and fruits. But the fact that there's going to be other foods, the ones I always binge on and the ones that appeal to me is going to be so hard. I can fill myself up with the foods on my list but I know that if I don't eat what I want, I'll just end up binging. I don't know, it's a continuous cycle of restricting and binging. It kills me just to step into supermarkets because of this.


    I definitely think MFP contributes to my binging. I never used to binge like this until I started to restrict. If I go two calories over and that red number comes up, it sparks something inside of me. It tells me "Hey, you went two calories over. Now, the day is ruined so go binge". And It's not a cheat meal where the normal would be like 500 calories over. I eat 4-5 thousand calories over. But If I stay under, about 200-300 calories under my 1400 calorie goal, I'm good. But with MFP, I lost over 45 pounds so I know it's effective in weight loss. But it really has messed up my mind with my binges. But I don't trust myself to go off MFP because it's how I got fat in the first place. If I let go of the control, I'll binge every day. I honestly don't trust myself with food. MFP is the only thing keeping me sane with weight control.

    I know I sound crazy, I'm sorry if I do.
  • dauvis
    dauvis Posts: 57
    I too try to avoid the buffets because of my control issues (don't know if it is BED but I have some sort of issue). The last time I went to a buffet was because there were no other choices. It was a chinese buffet. I stuck mostly to seafood and salads. I allowed myself some small amounts of the foods that I really like to satiate the cravings for those foods. I can't say that I did a good job (estimated 1200 calories total) but I did keep under my goal for the day.
  • I, too, have BED and the only thing that works for me is to eat low carb. Whenever I've been faced with buffets, I can usually manage to find enough low(er) carb offerings to eat that won't set me up for a binge session. Since I've been lifting fairly heavy I've had to add back in some carbs, but not anything processed or starchy, just veggies and lower carb fruits. Otherwise, any carbs at all in the past have just been a slippery slope back to bingeing.

    I realize that won't help in the short run, but it might in the long run.

    Good luck!

    Whenever I do binge, I do tend to binge on carbs. Such as Kashi cereal, Barbara's cereal, Sara Lee 45 calorie bread, and oatmeal. So perhaps I will try to avoid carbs even though they're the first thing I want :/
  • MsSerious
    MsSerious Posts: 9 Member
    my idea is to allow yourself your favorite super low calorie food. and make everything else restricted to one plate. maybe say nothing white or yellow/orange. good luck. :)
  • dauvis
    dauvis Posts: 57
    I, too, have BED and the only thing that works for me is to eat low carb. Whenever I've been faced with buffets, I can usually manage to find enough low(er) carb offerings to eat that won't set me up for a binge session. Since I've been lifting fairly heavy I've had to add back in some carbs, but not anything processed or starchy, just veggies and lower carb fruits. Otherwise, any carbs at all in the past have just been a slippery slope back to bingeing.

    I realize that won't help in the short run, but it might in the long run.

    Good luck!

    Whenever I do binge, I do tend to binge on carbs. Such as Kashi cereal, Barbara's cereal, Sara Lee 45 calorie bread, and oatmeal. So perhaps I will try to avoid carbs even though they're the first thing I want :/

    To get to where I am now, my first fight was to get my issues under control. It took me from April to mid-August/early September to get back in control. I did not log anything as weight loss was not the motivation at that time. I actually think that not having weight loss as a motivation and not logging contributed to in my being able to be where I am now.

    YMMV, but not logging until you get in control, might help you as well. Just a possibility to consider.
  • gngra5
    gngra5 Posts: 1
    Until you can manage the disorder it is seriously better to not go to buffets at all. Do not put yourself in that position until you are strong.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    I did pre log what I want to eat, I have the app in my phone. It's a sushi/Chinese buffet. I know sushi has a lot of calories even though it's a "diet" food. I'm thinking I'm going to stick with one cup of egg drop soup, a shrimp/veggie mix (spoonful), salad, and fruits. But the fact that there's going to be other foods, the ones I always binge on and the ones that appeal to me is going to be so hard. I can fill myself up with the foods on my list but I know that if I don't eat what I want, I'll just end up binging. I don't know, it's a continuous cycle of restricting and binging. It kills me just to step into supermarkets because of this.


    I definitely think MFP contributes to my binging. I never used to binge like this until I started to restrict. If I go two calories over and that red number comes up, it sparks something inside of me. It tells me "Hey, you went two calories over. Now, the day is ruined so go binge". And It's not a cheat meal where the normal would be like 500 calories over. I eat 4-5 thousand calories over. But If I stay under, about 200-300 calories under my 1400 calorie goal, I'm good. But with MFP, I lost over 45 pounds so I know it's effective in weight loss. But it really has messed up my mind with my binges. But I don't trust myself to go off MFP because it's how I got fat in the first place. If I let go of the control, I'll binge every day. I honestly don't trust myself with food. MFP is the only thing keeping me sane with weight control.

    I know I sound crazy, I'm sorry if I do.
    You don't sound crazy, you sound human. Restricting does that to all of us. It burns me up that people think MFP can be, or worse, HAS to be, a way of life. It's not normal to restrict and count. It messes you up. But it's also so hard to feel out of control, so I totally understand the desire to keep it all collared.

    I think there is a lot to be said for learning to live in the gray area. I struggle with it all the time.

    That feeling of wanting to binge because you went over is probably because we over-restrict and really do need a mental 'excuse' to just eat to fullness, for once, like people do. I think we need to feel full at 110% (or 300%) because our bodies don't trust us to feed it fully after too long of deficits. I think diet breaks are good. Gaining a little weight is a lesser evil. And practice having mini-binges. Usually what you think blew your goal out of the water actually barely hurt it. Learn to overeat by 100-400 calories by aiming to do so. Good luck!