successful ... but still miserable...

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I have noticed a bunch of folks on MFP whose pics look like they are super skinny to me, and yet they are still trying to lose more weight. I wondered if these folks were really people with eating disorders or some other such problem. It seemed unreasonable.

Well, I'm not at my goal weight (I'm about 6-10 lbs away)....and my goal weight is evern a little high for someone my height.... but I did lose 30 lbs the first half of this year and kept it off the second half even though I had some serious sicknesses making me unable to exercise, etc.

Anyways, I normally feel pretty good about myself- i fit into my "skinny" clothes, etc. But yesterday, my tattoo artist was working on his portfolio and took a picture of a full side peice I have. He sent me the pic as a courtesy to show me what he was putting in his portfolio and I look HORRIBLE. Like so horrible, I couldn't sleep all night thinking about how everyone who comes to his shop or works at his shop (which includes friends of mine and their social connections) are going to see this picture of my lard. My belly stuck out and looked all lumpy and disgusting. It's really really really bothering me. And I am also feeling really angry that even after all this work, I still have this horrible, ugly belly. (Yes my profile pic looks like I"m skinny but it's only cuz I'm lying down. When I stand up, I have a lower belly "pooch".... the fact that I can look flat lying down is thanks to MFP). I already told him he can't use that picture unless he crops me out of it and just shows the ink.... but I"m wondering if anyone else has this problem...legitimately....that they have come so far, hit the "last ten" wall and are totally disheartened and angry that they still aren't skinny and feel like they look horrible.

Also, since we're on the subject....does anyone have any tips on how to get rid of that lower belly that doesn't involve surgery (I can't afford it)?? I'm working on lowering my carbs and increasing arobic exercise...but any herbs, magic pills, whacky exercises, meditations, potions, or ridiculous restrictions that will actually get rid of that horrid thing would be nice. I want to, for just ONCE in my life, actually be skinny and not have to worry about crap like cameras and lighting.

Now I feel really bad about my body. I don't want to eat, or wear any nice clothes. I just wanna bury myself in fluffy sweaters and walk until I pass out and cry. Am I being unreasonable or just human?

The tattoo is awesome...there's at least that.

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Replies

  • kmtetour
    kmtetour Posts: 300 Member
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    First off, I do not have a flat belly (more like a fat belly). However, I would think abdominal strength exercises (crunches and such) would help with that. It's at least worth a try.
  • watkinsc
    watkinsc Posts: 177 Member
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    You are far too hard on yourself. Women have real bodies. You maybe subconsiously comparing your self to the artificial images seen in magazines, and what-not. You have to be ok with 'who' you are. Just being a thinner version of yourself does not automatically make you happy. Look how far you have come. I can total relate to the self-hatred of your own image.. We are so critical of ourselves. You look at the picture of your tatoo and you see 'belly'. Other's look at the picture and see 'tatoo".. Relax, take a deep breath. Remember this is about being healthy. Not about trying to look like the most recent photoshopped pic of a supermodel. Refocus. You've got this.. You're doing great...
  • bostoto19
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    Hey!

    I know the feeling you are having right now! Unfortunetly there is no way to target a certain body part through workout. My advice is if you are going to a gym talk with a trainer about what you can do or change. I used to do a bunch of crunches/situps but was told by a trainer that I could do those until I was blue in the face and it wouldn't change anything in my stomach area. I would say keep working out, cardio etc and good luck!
  • digitalyssa
    digitalyssa Posts: 112 Member
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    This is the type of thing I wrote about yesterday in my blog too...

    Still trying to come to terms with it.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/digitalyssa/view/post-trip-uncertainty-49813
  • raelbee
    raelbee Posts: 219
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    Been there. You need to keep doing cardio to burn the fat off, and add some strength training to build your ab muscles. Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred DVD worked miracles for me - and I've had a baby and thought I would NEVER have a flat stomach or be able to see my abs again. I've accomplished both, and feel like I look pretty smokin' these days. You can do it, but you've got to sweat it out.
  • CORTNEY5
    CORTNEY5 Posts: 87 Member
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    I have the exact same issue. I am down to 135 lbs, (10 more to go) but am so totally disgusted with my stomach. The pouch and flabby part. I know you have to build muscle over your fat to get rid of it. There in lies the problem. I know just losing weight won't get rid of the belly. Yes, you'll look better in clothes when you lose weight. But plain and simple, the only thing you can do without cosmetic surgery, is work it off, build muscle over the fat, and that is it.
  • lotusfromthemud
    lotusfromthemud Posts: 5,335 Member
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    It's normal to feel this way sometimes. It's most likely due to an unflattering camera angle, with no photoshopping, which is what we've become accustomed to thinking "real" bodies look.

    Wear your sexy skinny clothes, and go out into the world. My guess is you'll feel better in no time. Don't hide, don't starve and don't punish yourself.
  • Bellydance
    Bellydance Posts: 105 Member
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    Oh honey, you are being unreasonably human I think. Why do we all want to be that perfectly flat, no flaws person. It's not reality (it's helping me say this by the way cuz I want it too). You look healthy and I understand about the flat while lying down thing. Maybe you will never be perfect..........Most of us wouldn't like you if you were LOL. J/K

    I guess I'm just saying that you are having a down, pity me day cuz of a pic you saw of yourself in the 'not the most flattering way' and you feel bad about it. Push it, literally, out of your head. Keep doing what you can and be happy with the success you have. No miserableness allowed. YOU SAID: Successful!!! stick with that. For myself, I'm just coming to terms that I will never be the way I've always wanted because by body is getting older. I may never have small arms, but they are going to be the tightest arms I CAN have. I think about that with most parts of my body :) Turn that little tummy pooch into something good. I actually think girls with a little pooch there is kinda cute. And it's normal to have that on most people.

    You look good..............I want you to FEEL good too. Give yourself a break and get that pic out of that shop!! And go with the awesome tattoo thoughts!
  • slrose
    slrose Posts: 164 Member
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    not hardcore, but a consistant cardio schedule (think 15 min jog, EVERY night) also stretching and yoga proves helpful
  • ErinMarie25
    ErinMarie25 Posts: 733 Member
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    I think about this a lot, too. I have a lower belly pooch that I am still working out and it sucks! Yes, I wear size small shirts, but I am unhappy with my little pooch chilling out there. I am NOT bikini material and I want to be so I can finally go to the beach and LIKE the beach. I always said I hated it, but I only hate it because of how I looked and would wear regular clothes. Cardio really is the best way to get rid of body fat, so I say to keep doing that. You can't spot fat reduction which also sucks.