Every day I fail

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  • 42nFab
    42nFab Posts: 36
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    hey Girl - if your are doing some cardio each day, it's better then not doing anything!!
    It's like quitting smoking - you can try a hundred times but you will know when you are ready and will do it,
    I am the biggest yo yo dieter around.....I work so hard to lose 20 pounds and then gain it all back because I feel confident again. This time I am focusing on making this apart of my life - not just to lose it temporarily. The weight didn't come on in 2 weeks so we can't expect it to come off in 2 weeks right :)

    You mentioned you do your cardio....is this earlier in the day? I recently tried to do my cardio in the evening and it's working out that I don't have the cravings I usually do if I'm sitting in front of the tv. Maybe it would be worth a try to move it to the evenings?

    Be in tune with your body. If you are feeling hungry and board at night, drink a ton of water.....you can also try Zumba classes on utube at no charge to get you moving if you don't feel like leaving the house!!!

    Add me as a friend if you'd like and we can chat when you need to! :).
  • lthames0810
    lthames0810 Posts: 722 Member
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    Me too, if eating and excercising exactly to plan is how I define success. I allow myself some wiggle room.

    I agree completely with @MinnieInMaine. Change only one thing at a time. In fact, her idea about just logging without trying to *diet* will show you where most of your excess calories are coming from. Maybe only a relatively small change will enable you to eat at a deficit without being miserable. For now, who cares if you're eating clean or paleo or whatever? Just get the weight moving and you can refine things later on.

    You are wise not to have a specific goal for weight loss (although you have to put something in the setup for MFP to calculate your calories.) That way any loss is a success and will motivate you further.

    Oh, and have you heard the old saying: "Idle hands are the devil's playground?" Well, idle hands are the dieter's enemy, too. Find some busy work to keep your hands occupied so you can't have food in them at the same time. You can do jigsaw puzzles or take up knitting or stuff like that. If you have several of those activities easily available to you, you can flit from one to another when focus becomes an issue.

    You can do this!
  • 42nFab
    42nFab Posts: 36
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    Bottle of wine and a footlong sub last night. Fail.

    Back on the horse this a.m.
    i like this guy!
  • tattedlady75
    tattedlady75 Posts: 185 Member
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    I started my diet/exercise plan 3 weeks ago and every day I fail. Things start out well, I do my cardio, watch my calories, but by the end of the day I just say 'eff this, I'm bored and hungry'.

    Maybe y'all can help motivate me.

    Here are some ideas that may help. Eat more fruits and veggies in the evening, get some low calorie snacks, eat more protein and get rid of any tempting food that would make you want to snack in the evening. When you get the urge that your bored and hungry grab a bottle of water and walk around drinking it. After drinking all that water if your still hungry have a small snack carrot sticks, an apple, hard boiled egg, cheese stick or some other low calorie snack. Lately the evening have been killer for me as well, I keep wanting to snack on foods and I have given in several times, but I start over the next day. Your aloud to have mess up days, try not to deprive yourself too much during the day and fill up on fiberous foods and protein.
  • 42nFab
    42nFab Posts: 36
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    I feel you. I had YEARS worth of "day 1" and "start tomorrow". Yes I wanted it badly, more badly than I can express, as I was miserable in a fat body. But still that didn't stop me from continually pushing my goals off until some non-descript "tomorrow".

    It doesn't change until you recognize that you aren't "failing", you're just choosing to put your enjoyment of food above your body goals. I had to recognize that food wasn't calling my name, I was DECIDING to eat in ways that weren't conducive to my goals. As miserable as I was I just didn't want it enough to affect change.

    But if you have the power to stay the same, or get worse, than you in equal parts have the power to change. It took me years to own my power, but eventually I did. It got to the point where I couldn't stay fat anymore and I refused to let anything stop me.
    You don't realize just how strong you are until you get over the initial hurdles of discomfort.

    Now I don't look at days as "failures" or "successes". I own that I chose to put every ounce of food in my mouth that goes in, or not. That's incredible freedom. I hope you find the same.
    freedom in deed!!! Well said!
  • kmantic
    kmantic Posts: 5 Member
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    I think that "eff this, I'm bored and hungry. " is probably a carb/sugar/food addiction of some kind that has a hold of you. Seriously.. those "bad" foods that spike your blood sugar are addictive and your body wants to stay addicted, just like when a person is on a real drug.

    My suggestion: GET RID of all that junk from your house. Eat if if you want, but don't buy anymore after that. Know when you're eating it "this is it, no more". Then buy some apples or something to satisfy your craving, but that won't kill your entire day. Binge on apples if you want, I guarantee no one ever got obese by eating apples or any other fruit. Then gradually wean yourself off that craving and onto better foods. A nice, pre-mixed chocolate protein shake also satisfies those cravings very well.

    Binging, from my experience, is a bi-polar, sort of out of body experience.. the person you are when you're binging who doesn't give a F about anything is not the same person as the one who keeps trying over and over and is sick of carrying the extra weight around. You have to kill the other person. Don't let them show up. Talk to yourself when you're about to eat sh*tty food. Put up stickies or signs when you're in that right frame of mind that will bring you back when you're about to enter the "eff it" state of mind. Plan your day so you're not bored, do something different to avoid that situation.

    Whether you liked the advice or not, the guy who said the only person who can ultimately help you, is you. The fact that you keep trying is a great sign, but ultimately - you have to find your "why".

    Friedrich Nietzsche: "He who has a why can endure any how."
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
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    Bottle of wine and a footlong sub last night. Fail.

    Back on the horse this a.m.

    Nothing wrong with a footlong if it fits your macros. The bottle of wine probably put you over your carbs though. :wink:
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
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    I think that "eff this, I'm bored and hungry. " is probably a carb/sugar/food addiction of some kind that has a hold of you. Seriously.. those "bad" foods that spike your blood sugar are addictive and your body wants to stay addicted, just like when a person is on a real drug.

    My suggestion: GET RID of all that junk from your house. Eat if if you want, but don't buy anymore after that. Know when you're eating it "this is it, no more". Then buy some apples or something to satisfy your craving, but that won't kill your entire day. Binge on apples if you want, I guarantee no one ever got obese by eating apples or any other fruit. Then gradually wean yourself off that craving and onto better foods. A nice, pre-mixed chocolate protein shake also satisfies those cravings very well.

    Binging, from my experience, is a bi-polar, sort of out of body experience.. the person you are when you're binging who doesn't give a F about anything is not the same person as the one who keeps trying over and over and is sick of carrying the extra weight around. You have to kill the other person. Don't let them show up. Talk to yourself when you're about to eat sh*tty food. Put up stickies or signs when you're in that right frame of mind that will bring you back when you're about to enter the "eff it" state of mind. Plan your day so you're not bored, do something different to avoid that situation.

    Whether you liked the advice or not, the guy who said the only person who can ultimately help you, is you. The fact that you keep trying is a great sign, but ultimately - you have to find your "why".

    Friedrich Nietzsche: "He who has a why can endure any how."

    Protein spikes your insulin response as much as sugar. I agree it is important to eat a BALANCE of your macros to keep blood sugar levels steady and binges at bay. No need to purge anything from your pantry unless you want to.
  • scottyg70
    scottyg70 Posts: 388 Member
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    I'm just echoing what others have said but don't make so many drastic changes it's overwhelming. It's a process, really. You're trying to undo behavior that took you years to develop, so it's not going to happen overnight. Don't dwell on failures. Recognize them, learn from the but don't dwell on them.

    You're doing to important thing, you're jumping back on the horse. Everyone fails. Anyone who says they don't is a liar. But you've got to do this for you. Not your significant other, your kids, your Uncle Bill or whoever, it's YOU. That is my motivation every day. If I skip a workout or if I thought Taco Bell was a great idea, I'm only hurting myself. Good luck!
  • kducky22
    kducky22 Posts: 276 Member
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    Bottle of wine and a footlong sub last night. Fail.

    Back on the horse this a.m.

    Is it bad that I think is sounds like an amazing night?!

    But the help out with the OP, I think a majority of us have to deal with the "I'm bored, let's eat" type of mentality. I think that's how we all got here in the first place. I think the best thing for you to do is to find something to occupy your time. I find that if I'm playing video games I won't mindlessly eat because I need both hands to play. Or I try to keep flavored water or tea next to me at all times. That way when I feel the urge to mindlessly much I try to grab those instead. For me it's trying to find things that keep you so busy that you don't have TIME to bored eat.

    GOOD LUCK!! Feel free to add me for extra motivation!
  • 4daluvof_candice
    4daluvof_candice Posts: 483 Member
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    Honest truth.. nobody here is going to make you succeed.. we can give you support but if you don't even make it 1 day (that is if your not eating in an extreme deficit) then you obviously aren't ready to lose weight.

    You're definitely not the type I wanted to respond. I came to the forum *for* support, not for you to give me a magic weight loss spell.

    Maybe you shold try the motivation thread instead of the general diet and weightloss help thread. :wink:
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,098 Member
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    When I feel I did not live up to my expectations. I ask myself what did I learn? What manageable change can I make. I just heard the quote, "Losing weight is a marathon not a sprint." in the book What am I Hungry For. Everyone has good days and not so good days. Hopefully as time goes on the good out weigh the bad and you make the progress you seek. Take care. I find their are more supportive than not supportive people here. I find it best just to ignore those who are not supportive. Good luck to you.
  • ils_1231
    ils_1231 Posts: 249 Member
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    maybe what you need to do is just log an entire day without adhering to mfp-- don't go nuts, but eat what you would eat if you weren't adhering to a calorie limit. Once you find this number try cutting out 200 calories, and then the next week try cutting out 300 calories, etc. it might help you get used to the idea of eating less, and it would ease you into it. i'm a slow and steady wins the race kind of girl and maybe its too big of a change for you at the moment to go from x amount of calories to say 1200 ( using this bc that seems to be the mfp magic starting number).
  • smithalexar
    smithalexar Posts: 3 Member
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    Making mistakes means that you are trying and that is half the battle!!!

    Check into your diet, are you geting enough calories to maintain your body? Are they they right calories and are you eating them at the right time of the day? I eat all day long and I am rarely ever hungry. It's all about what you are eating and when you are eating it! I would love to help on a more personal level - just message me!
  • JustinAnimal
    JustinAnimal Posts: 1,335 Member
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    Well, not to make my night sound any better, but did I mention I did this while watching KILL BILL! Oh yeah, it was THAT kind of good.

    I agree with a lot of the advice you're getting, original poster, from the other ladies. Eat more raw fruits and veggies. Before each meal, eat two servings of fruit or veggie, drink two big glasses of water, then eat your meal.

    Also, just exercise more. If you exercise like mad, you can somewhat justify some of those little splurges.

    Lastly, practice makes perfect. Trying IS half the battle. If you keep at it, this will become more routine. It just takes time. I understand getting frustrated. I'm still pissed I don't look better after all of my awful holiday splurging (curse you winter beer!).
  • poppyetpear
    poppyetpear Posts: 15 Member
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    Thanks everyone! and I will swing over to the motivation thread. I'm new to this site, but it definitely has helped so far. Maybe I'm just feeling a bit defeated today, but don't we all have our days where we feel defeated, but then do something that makes us feel good about ourselves :)
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
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    Kallie,

    All I can say is to take it one day at a time. It sounds like you are on the right track with just logging your food, using a tape measure to keep track of your weight loss, and just being aware of what you put into your mouth.

    I advise you eat what you've always eaten, and what you like, but stay conscious of food portions. Weigh your solid food and measure your liquids. For the solid food, don't trust any MFP entires that say a small, medium, or large anything ,but instead look for grams or ounces and then weigh food accordingly. This includes fruit, vegetables, peanut butter, nuts, etc.

    If you want support, there is plenty here but it often comes in the form of blatant honesty. Just hang in there, take it one day at a time, and work hard to get rid of that "every day I fail" mentality. :smile:
  • callyart
    callyart Posts: 209
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    Definitely baby steps

    I started by cutting out fizzy drinks, and having water or peppermint tea instead. Then I cut out take aways, and started cooking more at home (We were having 2 take aways a week so this has helped me so much)

    Then I started doing smaller portions, and eating healthier.

    If I feel hungry, I eat a piece of fruit, a rice cake, some nuts, or a cereal bar. These are much better options than crisps, cookies, and all the other junk I used to eat.

    You have to *want* to change in order to do this. There's plenty of times I have asked myself why don't I just order dinner tonight, or pop into maccies for a burger? Then I remind myself of the reasons why I am losing weight.

    - To feel healthier
    - Be more confident
    - Wear smaller size clothes
    - To have more energy

    These reasons are more important to me then the cravings, so I let it slide. I busy myself and think of other things.

    Also, I would recommend planning meals, purchasing weighing scales so you aren't just guessing at your calorie intake, gain the support of the people around you (in real life and on here - add people on here, there's so much support!)

    Slow and steady wins the race. Don't count on losing lots and fast, but keep reminding yourself.

    Don't be afraid to treat yourself. I eat what I want when I want, but I moderate so I don't go over my calories. If I do go over my calories, I try not to beat myself up, because tomorrow is another day

    Also, take a look at the 'Success stories' threads. There are amazing weight losses on this site that help remind me why I am doing this.

    Good luck!!
  • RockinTerri
    RockinTerri Posts: 499 Member
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    Kallie - Advice does come in all forms, and sometimes it is hard to hear the advice through negativity. I know, as it was hard for me at first too.

    That said, in order to achieve your goals and be successful, you do need something to measure your progress. A scale would definitely be one of the best ways, but there are others. If you have a measuring tape, take your measurements. If your clothes are fitting better or become loose, that's another way. As for measuring your foods, measuring cups, measuring spoons, and even using a guideline (such as a fist is about a cup) are all various ways of judging the amounts.

    Don't be too restrictive either - that can also be damaging. Make sure to have plenty of water in your diet, and a good balance of proteins, fiber, and healthy fats.

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