"Why are you on a diet?"

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Is the question that I got asked by a guy with whom I was hooking up last night. He's a friend with whom I spend a reasonable amount of time and I'm pretty comfortable, so he (unlike a lot of other people I know) has seen me logging my food and working exercise into my schedule.

I honestly didn't know what to say. In part because that's not how I think of what I do. Yeah, I'm eating at a small deficit. I threw out a comment about how I lose weight in my torso before anywhere else (the comment was made at a moment where that was all that was obvious), which is true. He didn't seem to buy it, but the subject was dropped in favor of other things.

I have a normal BMI, and my body fat/muscle is distributed in ways that mean I have bones sticking out in some places and a little more body fat than I'd like in others. I'm comfortable with what I'm doing and I know I'm not doing anything unhealthy, but I don't always know how to respond to comments. Any advice?

Replies

  • hearthemelody
    hearthemelody Posts: 1,025 Member
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    Is the question that I got asked by a guy with whom I was hooking up last night. He's a friend with whom I spend a reasonable amount of time and I'm pretty comfortable, so he (unlike a lot of other people I know) has seen me logging my food and working exercise into my schedule.

    I honestly didn't know what to say. In part because that's not how I think of what I do. Yeah, I'm eating at a small deficit. I threw out a comment about how I lose weight in my torso before anywhere else (the comment was made at a moment where that was all that was obvious), which is true. He didn't seem to buy it, but the subject was dropped in favor of other things.

    I have a normal BMI, and my body fat/muscle is distributed in ways that mean I have bones sticking out in some places and a little more body fat than I'd like in others. I'm comfortable with what I'm doing and I know I'm not doing anything unhealthy, but I don't always know how to respond to comments. Any advice?

    It seems like a question that you should know the answer to before you begin, but I know what you mean. When I started weightlifting, I got asked a lot about why I was doing it.

    I finally answered that I was tired of being tired. I want to be strong and lean!

    Perhaps for you an option would be "There is always room for improvement!" or "I happily subscribe to modern beauty standards!"
  • esmeylull
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    Now I got asked this question every day. "Don't you think you are already skinny?" or "You don't have to change yourself for others" or something like that.
    They obviously don't see me at home (eating whole pies) , they choose to see me when I feel extraordinarily healthy and eating salads. When the person is someone I don't really care, I simply don't answer it or just say" Personal reasons."
    But sometimes my close friends or family members ask. I say the truth, I have a binge eating disorder and trying to have a healthier lifestyle and getting rid of the risk of diabetes. I am sure that it is not the case with you. The easiest thing to say would be "I want to make sure I am healthy by logging what I eat." or "I am trying to stay in shape and this helps me".
    Nobody is going to question or judge that.
  • _db_
    _db_ Posts: 179 Member
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    just tell him he's lucky to be hooking up with you and leave it at that.
  • luzye
    luzye Posts: 4
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    I share the same reasons as esmeylull: uncontrolled eating at night after being "healthy" all day and the fear of developing diabetes like the rest of my mother's family.
  • paul7799
    paul7799 Posts: 98 Member
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    Is the question that I got asked by a guy with whom I was hooking up last night. He's a friend with whom I spend a reasonable

    So more women will start sentences about me like the one above.
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
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    I've gotten that question in a similar situation too, and I answered that I want to have a fit body, and to get there, the first step is losing some more weight. Seemed to work fine, and it's true!
  • albloomfield60
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    I was thinking about this the other day. Should this really be called a "diet"? What I'm doing is a life style change, because when I get down to the weight I want, I'm going to keep logging and keep counting calories. A "diet" seems like a temporary thing, not something I plan on doing until the day I die.
  • Jkn921
    Jkn921 Posts: 309 Member
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    I was thinking about this the other day. Should this really be called a "diet"? What I'm doing is a life style change, because when I get down to the weight I want, I'm going to keep logging and keep counting calories. A "diet" seems like a temporary thing, not something I plan on doing until the day I die.

    I feel the exact same way I don't like the word 'diet' as it has a negative connotation to me, as if you're doing it for a period of time to slip up again...which is not what it means to a lot of us here.
  • knra_grl
    knra_grl Posts: 1,568 Member
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    Are you dieting or maintaining? A good answer would be that tracking is a healthy approach to eating. Tell him to make a profile and enter his food for a week.
  • stormbornkraken
    stormbornkraken Posts: 303 Member
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    I was thinking about this the other day. Should this really be called a "diet"? What I'm doing is a life style change, because when I get down to the weight I want, I'm going to keep logging and keep counting calories. A "diet" seems like a temporary thing, not something I plan on doing until the day I die.

    ^Precisely this. It becomes part of a lifestyle, a routine focused on health and long term well being.
  • LeahFerri
    LeahFerri Posts: 186 Member
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    Thank you all for the helpful replies! I don't know if it'll come up again, but if it does, I'll definitely emphasize that it's about health rather than specifically weight. Especially because that's really true for me when it comes to mental health, too.

    I don't like the word "diet" either, and I hear it so very little around here that hearing it applied to me was sort of a curveball--part of why I didn't know what to say!

    I'm pretty sure he knows he's lucky. :wink:
  • hzliiz
    hzliiz Posts: 166 Member
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    Get used to it, it never ends. Turn down the donut in the break room at work and you'll hear "But you're skinny, why are you on a diet?" or some endless variation on that interaction. I tell the truth -- "I watch what I eat to avoid getting fat." Done and done.
  • SherryTeach
    SherryTeach Posts: 2,836 Member
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    I just stay that keeping track of my food will help me lead a long, healthy life.