Is there anyone out there battling severe depression?

Krisstacular
Krisstacular Posts: 3
in Motivation and Support
Complimented with binge eating and what feels like such powerful rage you could go crazy on the outside screaming?

I feel just so alone right now :(
My diabetes management team didn't come through for me, i called asking for a way to get a hold of my psychologist so i could just talk to someone before i go crazy, and not only did they not answer when i called back later, but they didn't call me back with any solution.
Ive tried texting a couple co workers in hopes maybe they would just chat with me
no response all day.
I don't have any friends outside of work..
and family is incredibly unsupportive...
Am i alone out there?

Replies

  • Krisstacular
    Krisstacular Posts: 3
    It seems i always pick the times when im most desperate and there is not a soul to be found on the internet. :(
    Im sorry i seem so pathetic :(
  • RoyBeck
    RoyBeck Posts: 947 Member
    Hey. Why so sad? Talk to me.
  • Jennkies
    Jennkies Posts: 382 Member
    I'm here too!

    I feel similar feelings to you too... I get a loneliness I can't seem to satisfy. Sometimes it does help to talk it out, so if you need someone shoot me a message.
  • katpatoneill
    katpatoneill Posts: 56 Member
    I'm recovering from severe depression, too- consider yourself messaged.
  • IrishChik
    IrishChik Posts: 465 Member
    You are welcome to add me as a friend.
    I suffer from major reoccurring depression. Been there done that with psychiatric care.
    I'm also a recovering/relapsed binge eater.
    You are not alone. We just need to find you a different means of communication.
    When I was on the road to recover I would do the OA online meetings. They have them all day ever day so whenever I would feel a binge or start a binge I would immediately get online and 'attend' one of these meetings because none are in my area.

    http://www.oa.org/
  • mortuseon
    mortuseon Posts: 579 Member
    Try not to panic about the diabetes management. I imagine that they will eventually get back to you - of course, it doesn't help for you to be on your own for a while, but you'll hear from them soon I'm sure.
    Light exercise can really help to boost mood and control appetite. I go running for this very reason; it helps me to avoid the worst lows that might usually hit and also reduce the binge eating.

    If you can, find a form of distraction. This can seem impossible when you're seemingly 'buried' in a low or anxious mood and it is all you can think about, but performing a menial task to break the cycle of rumination, make your worries seem less significant by putting them aside for a moment. This might manifest as exercise, some sketching (reading, if you can concentrate), even cleaning...just something that allows you to take an hour out and focus on nothing but the task at hand. You will often find that after the hour, your low will have passed and troubles may well seem much more manageable.
    Hope that helped somewhat - best wishes!
  • jamienjennings
    jamienjennings Posts: 3 Member
    I'm sure things will work out for you! I also have depression, I've been taking medicine for it since I was 10. I've noticed that now that I've started exercising, those bad thoughts have been decreasing a bit. It's still hard though, of course! I dropped out of school because it was too hard to get up in the morning, but i hope that I can get back on track eventually. I hope you know you're not alone!!
  • Krisstacular
    Krisstacular Posts: 3
    While i appreciate everyones concern.. or.. whatever it is...

    i reopened this account hoping that reaching out would make me feel better but its not
    i can't help but just wish i would not wake up tomorrow.
    Diabetes is supposed to be eventually fatal, why am i still waking up the next day..
    i apologize for making this topic, i will not make another in the future.
  • gigglesinthesun
    gigglesinthesun Posts: 860 Member
    go for a walk or do an exercise video from youtube at home, it'll get those endorphins going at least for a little bit.
  • moya_rargh
    moya_rargh Posts: 1,473 Member
    *puts hand up* Attempted suicide last July and still in a very dark place now.

    I identify with your post, OP. I feel very alone most of the time. If you can't get out or exercise today, why not put some headphones on and catch up with your favourite music on youtube? Music is like medicine for me.

    OP has already deactivated their account :(
  • paigealexandra93
    paigealexandra93 Posts: 21 Member
    I have borderline personality disorder - believe me, I know the feeling of being alone. You are NOT alone, most people just don't understand because they don't feel what you do.

    I have to go to sleep, but please feel free to send me a personal message to talk. (:
  • MissKarlee89
    MissKarlee89 Posts: 40 Member
    I have bipolar. So I get u.. :) if u wanna add me.. We can talk x
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
    I had severe depression for about 8 years. I have overcome!

    Talk it up if you need too!
  • bumblebreezy91
    bumblebreezy91 Posts: 520 Member
    I'm recovering from severe clinical depression, generalized anxiety disorder, and self-injury. Uphill battle. :heart:

    ETA: Oh, OP is gone :frown:
  • moya_rargh
    moya_rargh Posts: 1,473 Member
    How did you overcome it? What was it that triggered you to lift your mind out of the sludge?
  • tapirfrog
    tapirfrog Posts: 616 Member
    *kitten*. OP has already deactivated account?

    OP, please come back. I'm worried.
  • uberdilettante
    uberdilettante Posts: 18 Member
    I know the OP has deactivated her account, and at the risk of sounding completely stupid/corny/cheezy, etc. . .

    I just want to say that seeing you guys' outpouring of concern and sympathy was really touching . . . I think I know where the OP was coming from (I've been there too) and if I had folks like you around to give encouragement and support, it would have helped me through a lot of rough times. You guys are great! Thanks for being good, decent people. :smile:
  • bumblebreezy91
    bumblebreezy91 Posts: 520 Member
    How did you overcome it? What was it that triggered you to lift your mind out of the sludge?

    Me?

    Oh man. Kicking and screaming. It took years. Therapists, more than one, didn't find the right one until a few months ago. I was in and out of hospitals. Suicidal ideation. Suicide attempts. Cutting, isolating, sleeping, insomnia, trying all med combos under the sun, eating too much, eating too little, gaining weight, losing some then gaining it back and then more, never leaving my room let alone my apartment.

    I got out of it a little at a time. I'm still getting out of it. In fact, I have been recovered from self-injury for many months but I was triggered last night (didn't act on it, don't worry) out of the blue! Whoa! There are times when I want to stay in bed. I can't let myself. I have to take care of myself very carefully. I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. An injury could leave me bed-ridden. Too much time in bed gives me too much time to think. That gives me too much time to go into a spiral.

    I go to therapy once per week. It took me three years and three other therapists to find her.

    I talk to my fiancé.

    I try to speak my mind. I'm an introvert. I'm shy. I'm anxious and don't want people to think ill of me. This is hard for me to do.

    It's hard to get out of. It doesn't happen all at once. It happens in stages and sometimes I fall back into it.
  • Akimajuktuq
    Akimajuktuq Posts: 3,037 Member
    Included in a long list of health problems, I had severe depression, anxiety, borderline personality disorder, and binge eating disorder. I was sick for all of my life to varying degrees. No drugs, therapy, or any other thing ever helped me to feel better; I just got sicker and sicker year after year.

    So, the answer to the question: no, I no longer battle with severe depression or any other health problem. All problems were completely resolved by changing WHAT I eat. True story. Malnourishment affects the entire health of the body; the brain is part of the body.

    Too bad if the OP deactivated but maybe someone else might find it useful to consider that the food might matter.
  • moya_rargh
    moya_rargh Posts: 1,473 Member
    How did you overcome it? What was it that triggered you to lift your mind out of the sludge?

    Me?

    Oh man. Kicking and screaming. It took years. Therapists, more than one, didn't find the right one until a few months ago. I was in and out of hospitals. Suicidal ideation. Suicide attempts. Cutting, isolating, sleeping, insomnia, trying all med combos under the sun, eating too much, eating too little, gaining weight, losing some then gaining it back and then more, never leaving my room let alone my apartment.

    I got out of it a little at a time. I'm still getting out of it. In fact, I have been recovered from self-injury for many months but I was triggered last night (didn't act on it, don't worry) out of the blue! Whoa! There are times when I want to stay in bed. I can't let myself. I have to take care of myself very carefully. I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. An injury could leave me bed-ridden. Too much time in bed gives me too much time to think. That gives me too much time to go into a spiral.

    I go to therapy once per week. It took me three years and three other therapists to find her.

    I talk to my fiancé.

    I try to speak my mind. I'm an introvert. I'm shy. I'm anxious and don't want people to think ill of me. This is hard for me to do.

    It's hard to get out of. It doesn't happen all at once. It happens in stages and sometimes I fall back into it.

    Thanks for taking the time to reply. I hope that you're in a better place these days.
  • Rgroupe
    Rgroupe Posts: 2
    It is terribly hard when you feel down on yourself and can't see the light. Weight is a big thing (because people can be so cruel) even if they were there themselves. Peer pressure/ dog eat dog mentality. The winter time is hard because of the lack of sunshine for me so I do eat more. Then mentally I will feel defeated and that I failed. I know it's easier to give advise than to take it, especially when depressed. Sometimes we have to push our way out ourselves! Get up and move. Yes, same ol' but do it!!! Go for a walk. look at the sky, the trees, the stucture of the buildings, animals. Look at the beauty around you. Even early in the morning I get up before anyone and take a moment to look at the stars. Silly, but it just does work for me. I get a little peace of how we are little and somethings are not as important as the breath we are taking right now! Think of you, yourself and how great something is, we all have something wonderful about us! We Really, Really do! Keep working on it and those people who are not there for you and maybe are only there when you aren't down, you should not rely on. Rely on yourself and in the end you definately will be proud of yourself because you did it! It being whatever it is you are working on now. Keep going, don't give up, your life is way too precious! There is a smile for you at the end of this e-mail and it is for you and it is sincere! :)
  • Rgroupe
    Rgroupe Posts: 2
    sorry I did 't read your response before I responded. I am sorry you are dealing with what you are dealing with. I will read up and educate myself on this syndrome. I hope all goes well for you.
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
    Mine was set off by postpartum, after I had a child (my childeren are now 15 and 17 yrs old). At first I felt embarrassed and didn't want to get help. Finally I did and went to therapy and was on medicine, this all helped but some days and weeks were a struggle. Finally I got a divorce and left a job that I absolutely hated, and I feel more in control than I've ever been. I've been off my meds and haven't seen anyone since about 2008. I have sad times, happy times, silly times and serious times. But now I cope with my emotions and move on.

    And in the past couple of years I've been dealing with my dad going through throat cancer, my mom having brain cancer and buying a new house. (-the last was joyous but can still be a little stressful) I am strong enough to help my mom whom gets confused now and sometimes has to be in a wheelchair.

    I just feel I kicked all the negative to the curb and took back 'MY' life and do the things 'I' want to do. I make myself happy first and not feel guilty or selfish like I used too. Because if my soul is not happy then I found I will not be strong and healthy enough to help others or be there for others.

    However, listen to your doctors and do not just stop your meds on your own!!! (I did that early on and it was almost fatal.)

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