OMG - Never, ever give up hope!

Calliope610 · February 2014

Just had to share this with my fellow MFPer's with unhealthy, unwilling SO's.

I have been on MFP for little over a year. In that time, I have lost 36lbs, taken up walking for exercise, am training for a 10k, learned better eating habits, etc. The only thing I haven't done was to get my husband on board. He has resisted giving up his Dr Pepper habit (6 cans/day), cookie/ice cream habit and has also resisted exercise. In the beginning, I nagged him like a good wife, telling him how concerned I was about his health, that I wanted him to be with me for a long time, etc, etc, etc. He would say "I'm not gonna eat that diet food". Although he was supportive about my interest in better health and fitness, he wasn't at that place yet.

After I realized that nagging just made him dig his heels in even more, I decided to concentrate on myself. I continued to cook the meals he enjoyed; I just ate less (and walked more and longer). I talked about the visits to the doctor who was encouraging me, proud of me and considering taking me off my medications for high blood pressure, high cholesterol and pre-diabetic Metformin. He talked about visits to his doctor (we share the same dr) who was telling him he needed to lose weight, cut the sugar, get exercise, many take more medications. I decided to quit playing "bad cop" - I'll let his doctor to that.

Last week after a dr visit, he decided to switch his Dr Pepper for Dr Pepper10, asked my to buy "no-sugar-added" ice cream. He gave up his store bought sugar cookies for my more wholesome homemade oatmeal raisin cookies. When he thanked me for the cookies, I told him I have a proposition for him. Every week he goes walking at least 3 times, I will bake a fresh batch of cookies.

Not ten minutes later, he grabbed his walking stick and went walking.

Now granted, this just the beginning. I don't know how this will proceed. But want I do know it that nagging and *****ing didn't do the trick. But leading by example, yeah that worked. And I will keep doing just that.

So don't lose hope. Just keep living healthy, taking care of you, lead by example.

fast_eddie_72 · February 2014

That's awesome! Way to set an example. I can tell you, it's so much easier when your spouse is doing it with you. My wife and I are doing this together, so cooking lots of good food for us to take to work for lunches and planning healthy dinners. The kids don't like it so much, though. lol We let them get their junk, but they have to keep it out of sight!

shortsunflower · February 2014

In the beginning 7.5 months ago, my husband was on board with me. I told him I had to do better than I was doing and I would not cook separate meals etc. He dropped his Dr. Pepper habit (1-2 44oz drinks a day) and started eating salads, more fruits and veggies, and although he did not exercise because of his severe back problems and being too tall for the gym equipment (he is 7'2" tall), he actually lost more than me initially. I am now at nearly 53 pounds lost and he has gained back at least 20-25 of the 35 he lost and is saying he doesn't care, it doesn't matter and still not exercising or even getting in the pool at the gym to give his back some relief at least. He is still supportive and encouraging of me, but I want so badly for him to keep working on it if only so his back will feel better, although with spinal stenosis and 1 major surgery already it will always cause him pain, but extra weight does not help. He just has no hope and I spent 15 years there so I can't judge him, but I want him to keep trying.

Anyway, thanks for sharing your story, way to go on your healthy habits and keeping on the journey. I will continue to pray that God will put the desire to care for his body in my husband's heart, because you are right... nagging accomplishes NOTHING!

OMG - Never, ever give up hope!

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