your worse or humiliating experience when fat? PART 2
sickofbeingfat1986
Posts: 30
You can share more here if youd like but these are my experiences that im sharing here since I have a whole lifetime of them;
if I come up with more I will jot them down.
As a young girl because of hormonal problems as well I developed breast and was fat and was tall so I looked older and one boy in particular would make my life hell about it or talk about my chest,
Another little girl also said I looked pregnant ( this would happen as an adult too. which I never understood since you can clearly see that im fat EVERYWHERE so why assume im pregnant?) but kids In school weren't as cruel surprisingly
All my life my very own father would make actually fun of me or favor my thin sister over me and would ridicule me to the point where my mother would have to yell at him to shut up
As a teen I had an ugly awkward phase and for a while some people thought I was a guy
when I went to high school for a while I didn't do gym- I didn't want to be exhausted in front of everyone and I didn't want to shower- other girls would ask why I didn't go- I made up an injury but I knew they only asked to mock me or think ''she NEEDS to go to gym''
I dread being around small children because they ALWAYS mention how fat you are for everyone to hear
''shes too fat and ugly'' ''if you don't eat so much candy why are you so fat?''
Of course passing by a group of men or teenage boys is a scary thing since you can almost sense an insult coming on
as a teen my whole family went to a carnival. of course I NEVER go on the rides because I wont fit, even though at that time I was smaller compared to now. My mother persisted that I go with my much smaller cousins on this tea cup like ride with them even though I protested, so I went and attempted to sit down I got stuck because it was so snug for me but as I did sit my fat from my leg literally was crushing my small cousins foot and he screamed out in pain and EVERYONE was looking at me. Not only because of how curious they were to see how id fit into the ride but because I crushed my cousins foot and couldn't get up right away. I wanted to absolutely die and kill my mother . btw normal sized adults could fit I just couldn't .
Recently I was in my car and 2 men at the red light asked me if I wanted to join LA FITNESS but I knew they were mocking me and I even heard them ask each other if they should ask me.
When I lived with my father as an adult for 2 weeks, he claimed that I BROKE his treadmill because I am too fat AND he wanted to have a family meeting about this to reveal this in front of my step mother . We also went to a sushi restaurant and I couldn't fit into a booth so I quickly got up but I can hear my step mother whispering to the hostess ''she cant fit into the booth''
some days now I still worry about booths at restaurant's
On transportation:
people on planes trains and busses always give me ''that look'', the look of dread and curiosity and they sometimes move away from me as if I have a contagious flesh eating disease
on my last 2 plane flights years ago this happened ; on one flight I sat down next to a guy and I can tell he was uneasy.so a few moments passed and he got up and talked to a flight attendant, I knew they were talking about me. then a min later he was moved to another seat. He actually got up from his paid and assigned seat to get away from me AND then later because the same flight attendant saw I couldn't put on my safety bet of course she handed me an extension as I asked her ''was there something wrong since that guy moved?'' she was nervous and quickly lied about it
on another flight as I was looking for my seat and the overhead bin , I heard a man not so quietly whisper ''she should have bought 2 tickets/seats'' -referring to the south west flights policy of overweight people buying two seats for one person- it turns out I had to sit next to that man the entire time and as I sat down he gave me this nervous and full of **** ''hello''
I don't like to fly anymore- I missed my own cousin's wedding for this very reason
ive gotten stuck or felt extremely in concert seats
I think ive broken furniture or have to be very careful of what I sit in
2 separate people in one day thought I was pregnant
people/stranger's think they can say WHATEVER they want to you about your looks
the CREEPIEST men are attracted to me
ive knocked stuff over with my body (stomach/*kitten*) when turning or trying to maneuver
I don't like to go out anymore or have no social life- if I go out with skinny pretty women, im the D.U.F.F.- designated ugly fat friend- or if I go out with other fat women we look like a fat mob .even when I had bf's I didn't like them touching me or being affectionate with me in public because I know wed get looks - they were thin
sales people treat you like ****
my father wanted me to go with him to buy a new treadmill since I supposedly broke his - really the damn belt needed lube I think- anyway he wanted to get into a discussion with a stranger on how bad or dangerous it is to be fat as Im standing there. another time he wanted to play dr and list all of the diseases id get or talk about how I wont be hired for a job- as if I didn't know already
if I come up with more I will jot them down.
As a young girl because of hormonal problems as well I developed breast and was fat and was tall so I looked older and one boy in particular would make my life hell about it or talk about my chest,
Another little girl also said I looked pregnant ( this would happen as an adult too. which I never understood since you can clearly see that im fat EVERYWHERE so why assume im pregnant?) but kids In school weren't as cruel surprisingly
All my life my very own father would make actually fun of me or favor my thin sister over me and would ridicule me to the point where my mother would have to yell at him to shut up
As a teen I had an ugly awkward phase and for a while some people thought I was a guy
when I went to high school for a while I didn't do gym- I didn't want to be exhausted in front of everyone and I didn't want to shower- other girls would ask why I didn't go- I made up an injury but I knew they only asked to mock me or think ''she NEEDS to go to gym''
I dread being around small children because they ALWAYS mention how fat you are for everyone to hear
''shes too fat and ugly'' ''if you don't eat so much candy why are you so fat?''
Of course passing by a group of men or teenage boys is a scary thing since you can almost sense an insult coming on
as a teen my whole family went to a carnival. of course I NEVER go on the rides because I wont fit, even though at that time I was smaller compared to now. My mother persisted that I go with my much smaller cousins on this tea cup like ride with them even though I protested, so I went and attempted to sit down I got stuck because it was so snug for me but as I did sit my fat from my leg literally was crushing my small cousins foot and he screamed out in pain and EVERYONE was looking at me. Not only because of how curious they were to see how id fit into the ride but because I crushed my cousins foot and couldn't get up right away. I wanted to absolutely die and kill my mother . btw normal sized adults could fit I just couldn't .
Recently I was in my car and 2 men at the red light asked me if I wanted to join LA FITNESS but I knew they were mocking me and I even heard them ask each other if they should ask me.
When I lived with my father as an adult for 2 weeks, he claimed that I BROKE his treadmill because I am too fat AND he wanted to have a family meeting about this to reveal this in front of my step mother . We also went to a sushi restaurant and I couldn't fit into a booth so I quickly got up but I can hear my step mother whispering to the hostess ''she cant fit into the booth''
some days now I still worry about booths at restaurant's
On transportation:
people on planes trains and busses always give me ''that look'', the look of dread and curiosity and they sometimes move away from me as if I have a contagious flesh eating disease
on my last 2 plane flights years ago this happened ; on one flight I sat down next to a guy and I can tell he was uneasy.so a few moments passed and he got up and talked to a flight attendant, I knew they were talking about me. then a min later he was moved to another seat. He actually got up from his paid and assigned seat to get away from me AND then later because the same flight attendant saw I couldn't put on my safety bet of course she handed me an extension as I asked her ''was there something wrong since that guy moved?'' she was nervous and quickly lied about it
on another flight as I was looking for my seat and the overhead bin , I heard a man not so quietly whisper ''she should have bought 2 tickets/seats'' -referring to the south west flights policy of overweight people buying two seats for one person- it turns out I had to sit next to that man the entire time and as I sat down he gave me this nervous and full of **** ''hello''
I don't like to fly anymore- I missed my own cousin's wedding for this very reason
ive gotten stuck or felt extremely in concert seats
I think ive broken furniture or have to be very careful of what I sit in
2 separate people in one day thought I was pregnant
people/stranger's think they can say WHATEVER they want to you about your looks
the CREEPIEST men are attracted to me
ive knocked stuff over with my body (stomach/*kitten*) when turning or trying to maneuver
I don't like to go out anymore or have no social life- if I go out with skinny pretty women, im the D.U.F.F.- designated ugly fat friend- or if I go out with other fat women we look like a fat mob .even when I had bf's I didn't like them touching me or being affectionate with me in public because I know wed get looks - they were thin
sales people treat you like ****
my father wanted me to go with him to buy a new treadmill since I supposedly broke his - really the damn belt needed lube I think- anyway he wanted to get into a discussion with a stranger on how bad or dangerous it is to be fat as Im standing there. another time he wanted to play dr and list all of the diseases id get or talk about how I wont be hired for a job- as if I didn't know already
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Replies
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This is very hard.
but you have to try to care less about what people think and do serious steps to handle your problem, not for people , for yourself.
when any embarrassing situations happens to me I usually start to think that this is "My" life not theirs, in future when I look back upon my life I don't want to say that "some strangers" stopped me from doing the things I wanted to do and stopped me from living my life properly.
don't wait for people to be considerate because they won't, screw them!0 -
It must have been over ten years ago. I was staying over at a friend's house (let's call him Jack), and my family came over with another one of my friends (let's call him Tom) to drop something off/check on me. Well, Tom thought it would be hilarious to tell me he saw the pictures of me shirtless from when my family and I were vacationing at Cancun, and he made a gesture to emphasize my fatness (then he laughed about it). After he was gone, I cried and tried to drown my sorrow in pizza and that's when Jack came by wondering what was wrong. Keep in mind I was probably around ten years old. Elementary school boys can be cruel. :grumble:0
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You have to find a way to let all of that pain go! Let go of all of those things that still haunt you. Love yourself and make sure to remind yourself that you're doing this for you! You are beautiful, you are worthy, and you can do this! Screw what everyone else thinks! The way you look is no one else's business. It has taken me a long time to get to this point, but when I go somewhere, I may feel uncomfortable but I don't care because I am there for me! Be unapologetically you!0
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I never have been picked on, or mocked by my peers. They were probably kind enough to do it behind my back. But children are the worst. I love kids, absolutely adore them. And you can't be mad at them for their genuine curiosity, but it doesn't make it any easier to deal with. The children I babysit with constantly talk about my big booty, or my big belly and they don't understand why it's big if I'm not having a baby. The booty is the main topic though. The first time of the day that they mention it, it's still funny. But as the day goes on I start to wonder if my booty really makes that much of an impression and draws that much attention.
I've always loved rollercoasters. Recently I've been going on them less, due to anxiety. Mostly anxiety about being able to fit. This past Thanksgiving, my family went to a theme park and my parents made me go on a ride with my brother. After standing in line for over an hour, we got to the train, only to find out my restraint wouldn't fit. I had to be that person that got off because they were too fat. It was awful. My little brother felt so terrible and tried to get off, but I wanted him to at least enjoy the ride, so we ended up being even more a spectacle as I told him that if he got off I would be very upset with him. Of course my parents asked how the ride was and my brother told them I couldn't go. It was the most horrifying experience of my life.
Every time I fly, I am terrified that they will ask me to buy an extra seat. I try to sit by someone with younger children, because they're less likely to complain and nobody wants to sit by them either.
As awful as these things make me feel, they are my motivation! If I don't want to go to the gym I ask myself if I'd rather go to the gym or be asked to buy a second seat next time I fly. Additionally, I think they've made me a more compassionate, understanding, and less judgmental person. So hang in there!
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Someone at work asked when my baby was due
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I lost 100lb last year after being treated horribly by my ex. I think I stayed with him even though he was an a**hole because I felt like at my size I would be alone otherwise. Then I realised that he wasn't an a**hole to me because of weight - partly he was just an a**hole full stop, but also, he had no respect for me because I had absolutely no respect for myself. I would beat myself up about my size all the time but I never DID anything. I lost 120lb grand total, met an amazing guy, got engaged, and put back on that 20lb you do when you are happy and comfortable and eating too many restaurant meals, so now I have that 20lb to lose again, but I know I can do it, and it will be for ME. You can do it too, because you deserve to be happy, and to have the life you want. Your dad and stepmother don't get to make you feel like you can't - it's a big journey, but you've started it and that's amazing - be proud of yourself!0
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seat belt extender on the plane! The worst was looking at a guy that I 'thought' was bigger than me not needing one.. and I needed one! sad sad day.0
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I agree with everyone else that these moments in your life... are past moments. I have been overweight since childhood. I have been ridiculed by family, friends, peers. but as time moved on and I became my own person I learned I already had thick skin and that I can endure almost anything. Even though I have always shopped in plus size, I take the time to think about what I wear, my hair, and how I present myself. If you allow yourself to appear weak, people will treat you as if you were weak. I have learned to put myself first and realize that I am beautiful inside and out... even when I weighed my heaviest. You have to be your own cheerleader and support team. I am here to lose my next 45lbs... I can even afford to lose more, but this is my goal now. Find what works for you...and run with it.
"It’s your emotional issues, physical issues, and mental issues that you have to overcome."
"One meal, one thought, one day at a time, I'm strengthening my weight loss muscles."0 -
Went on a plane for the first time and had to get an extender. That wasn't too bad, I had figured I'd need one so whatever.
But then walking through that tiny planes aisle to the bathroom... omg. Have you ever gone on vacation and loaded up on Immodium? Yeah, don't. Because the immodium will stop working on your five hour trip back home and you will have to penguin waddle up the tiny aisle, trying not to bump into people with your big booty. NOT FUN.
Also I'm claustrophobic so cramming my fat *kitten* into such a small bathroom... no thanks.
I'd just like to know what it feels like to be a regular weight.0 -
Hugs hun. Much love and respect for your bravery. Your father sounds like a ****. I am sorry you have to deal with him. Hang in there, we can and will do this together.
My most embarrassing moment was in middle school. someone kicked me in the rear, and it seemed to shake forever, of course the little ****s got a good laugh, but I was mortified.0 -
I think that sometimes the smaller or unsaid things are the worst over a long-term period. Going to stores with my friends and having to look at clothing in a different department and/or different stores than them. Being politely left out of discussions about flirty lingerie. Ruling out all possibility of attending a public pool or water park - not because of adults' looks...I can handle those...but because I knew some little child would point and say "she's really fat!" and it would cause me to become very angry & upset.
Even some things that have gone unnoticed by others have bugged me in the past. My ex husband owned a Jeep Wrangler and several times we would go places with his best friend who is a very obese man (over 400 lb). My ex was also obese, around 300-320 lb probably. So they definitely had to sit up front and I'd climb in the back. I had no problem getting back there, but then one time his other friend (a big guy around 6'3" and a bit overweight) got in back with me and put on his seat belt. I started to buckle my seat belt and it would not fit, no matter what. At 5'8" and 270-something I knew I was obese but still kinda felt like I looked smaller than this guy but clearly I was not. I pretended that my own seat belt buckled (fortunately the Jeep didn't have a sensor telling the driver otherwise) but I was so distraught I did not enjoy the "joyride". Such a relatively small issue but it had a big impact on me.0 -
Someone asked my bf if MIss Piggy (aka me) is his girlfriend. He got really angry but I was so hurt, especially when I knew how hard I am trying to lose weight.0
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