emotional support needed

So I am a type 1 diabetic fighting almost an always losing battle with my weight; My highest weight peaked 190 lbs 2 years ago; I lost 20 and have been hovering around 170 since. Last summer I was 165 lb, then gained 8 this last school semester. I took matters into my hands and made my course load lighter so I could focus more on my health and well being. I work out 6.30 am throughout the week before classes and now I have time to cook myself healthy meals and lunches. I log my meals in a book and sometimes I'll come on here for a brief calorie check up to ensure I am not slipping from the track. So while I feel good about these healthy decisions (which I know reward will come with, in time), I have a problem!

My dad sends me monthly 'goodie' boxes--what college kid doesn't love that! The problem? It's ALWAYS full of chips, chocolate, candy, cookies--and I have told him SO MANY TIMES to STOP sending me junk food! He always goes "oh yeah of course, but a little treat every now and then doesn't hurt" but it does hurt, it hurts me, because I don't have the willpower to pick it up and throw it away! The guilt sets in (I mean, he went out of his way to get me all this) and the willpower crumbles (oh what is one cookie gonna do? then one becomes two becomes three..). And these come MONTHLY. It's to the point where I am in TEARS when I receive these because it is so painful for me as a diabetic to see this and have it waved into my face (an addictions an addiction everyone!)

I sent him another long email trying to explain to him that I plan to live to be over 50 (I work really hard to keep my blood sugars balanced)! I feel like nothing I say will work, I might just have to start getting angry with him.

I am not looking for advice on how to deal with him. I just need some motivation to stay on track with my new healthy habits or some sort of psychological way to not let this get to me. Please help me, I am going CRAZY OVER HERE

Replies

  • uconnwinsnc
    uconnwinsnc Posts: 1,054 Member
    You're not crazy. But, I am very sure you have some friends in school would would just love those cookies, chips, and snacks! Give them away to people and brighten their day. Your dad probably misses you and it is brutally difficult to buy any sort of gift for a college aged girl. I think his ignorance is getting the best of him, but his intentions are to be good.

    I'm not a doctor and have no right in telling a diabetic how to eat, but you need to try and not let food get an emotional hold over you.
  • NKoz82
    NKoz82 Posts: 25 Member
    I had Gestational Diabetes so I can feel your pain. Who doesn't want to give a pregnant woman food? You need to be open with your father and at this point it sounds like brutal honesty is the way to go. One cookie IS going to hurt. It will spike your blood sugars and require more insulin. You don't want to go blind, loose limbs, or die early. Tell him to send you things you need like healthy foods, gift cards to stores, or school supplies. If he will not stop then open the box in a public area and just give all the junk away immediately. Tell him Dad I opened the box and there was nothing I can eat in there so I gave it away. Eventually he will stop or you will make a ton of friends. He is your father and it sounds like he is just trying to take care of you and show you how much he loves you. Offer him suggestions on better ways to do that. I am a little confused that having a type 1 diabetic child he doesn't already know that you can't eat that stuff, I couldn't even eat a banana without my sugar shooting up.
  • You can always (You can do it!) refuse the package when the delivery man comes. It will get sent back to him, and he should hopefully realize you are serious.
  • manda1978
    manda1978 Posts: 525 Member
    I'd either send them back (so he understands that you're serious) or give them away unopened.
  • I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this. I couldn't imagine a family member doing this to a loved one who lives with type 1 diabetes. Maybe you could write down a list of all the reasons you want to be healthy such as: energy, looking good, taking less insulin, your future etc. Then whenever you get a package from your Dad remember what is truly important to you, your health. You have said that you have told your Dad clearly why you can't get these packages. Could you maybe also have someone from campus health mediate the message to him?
  • I appreciate everyones support and feedback a lot! Thank you kindly!
  • psmd
    psmd Posts: 764 Member
    My mom is the SAME way, tells me I need to lose weight and then gives me packages of heavy homemade food! You know what though, I never gained weight in college, because I would always give my food away!!! I was the most popular girl in my dorm!

    Just give those packages away immediately. Or leave them in a common kitchen/break area. I promise they will be gone the next day. Parents never listen, they always think they know what's best. By giving them away, they're not wasted and your dad's feelings aren't hurt!