New - Day One! Help!

Hello!

You should definitely try to eat as close to your calorie goal as possible. When you plug all of your information and goals into MFP, the calorie goal it gives you is what you need to eat to lose weight. Coming in too far under that goal can be counterproductive - it can be too restrictive and difficult to stick to, and if you eat too low, it can be too difficult to meet your body's nutritional needs. So yes, definitely eat that calorie goal, and if you add exercise to your daily routine, you should eat at least some of those exercise calories back as well.

As far as fruit goes, it's a great snack, but it may not be the best choice if you want something that will keep you full. Protein will fill you up and help keep you full for a longer period of time, and fat will make you feel more satisfied. Fiber also helps keep you full. You can play around with food combinations to find snacks/meals that combine protein, fat, and fiber to get the most out of your calories. But I highly recommend choosing foods that you enjoy eating. If you have a way of eating and exercising that you like, it will be much easier to stick to.

I would also recommend a book called Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch. You mentioned that doing MyFitnessPal again is your "last chance", which means that you've struggled with diets before. this is because dieting DOES NOT WORK, and in fact causes weight gain. I know it sounds like a paradox considering we're on a calorie counting website, but if there is any time in your busy mom life (congrats btw) to read, i would definitely read this book.

http://www.intuitiveeating.com/content/10-principles-intuitive-eating

Here.

I put this together a while back. It seems to have helped some folks. It worked for me and tons of others.

1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
2. Make sure you eat enough.
3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
12. don't set time restrictions.
13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
14 BE PATIENT.
15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
16. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

pretty much that.

...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

the typical MFP users does this:
1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
9. Argument ensues about who is right.

Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/

Don't eat under 1200 calories... seems counterintuitive but it really is important to eat enough just as it's important to not eat too much. Also the types and combinations of food you eat are important. When I had been seeing a dietitian she emphasized protein in EVERYTHING. If you want a yogurt for a sweet treat, make it greek - it has more protein. Also eat a small breakfast (1 slice whole wheat toast and 1 egg - the protein and good carb combo keeps you fuller longer). These are just some of the things that worked for me. What's been working lately is being in a game called diet betting it's a social dieting site where you can build a fantastic network of people in the same boat you are who are supportive and helpful. Plus there are so many people in some of the groups (2,000+ in one I am in) that everyone has different bodies and different experiences so they can give you ideas to try so you can find what works for you

I found that when I went too low the diary would show a warning that I was too low and might have difficulty losing weight. Don't forget exercise is not the only activity that burns calories. If you work all day and come home and do 3 hours of work around the house you could fall into a deep deficit. The diary should state activity instead of exercise. When you log in the activities for the day it will increase your calories to offset the extra calories burned. I found that once I started logging activities and replenishing those extra calories burned to keep my body even, that's when I started losing weight at a steady pace.