Anxiety about going to the gym
FaithInAes
Posts: 54 Member
Am I alone with this? I went to a new gym for the first time last night and the place was packed with super fit people. I felt so out of shape and out of place. I was going to go again tonight but I just feel so anxious about going. Any ways to overcome this?
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Replies
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Just do it anyway! Do not focus on others, as they are likely not focused on you. Once you go a few times, you will probably notice people of all different shapes and sizes and fitness abilities. Just do you! No excuses!!0
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First, great job on going to the gym, first step in the right direction. 2nd, who cares what everyone else looks like, your're gonna be there soon enough if you keep it up. If anyone stares or makes rude comments, ignore them. They aren't worth the time of day or the anxiety that they are causing you. Keep it up, you are awesome and you rock!0
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Everyone has to start somewhere. The more you go the more you learn. Don't be nervous, just do your own thing :flowerforyou:0
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Worry about yourself and walk in like you own it.0
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Just think of it this way- if you go or don't go you're still paying for it right? Don't you want to get your moneys worth and benefit from all the things your gym has to offer? Other people at the gym likely aren't even paying attention to anyone but themselves, so don't be concerned that they are judging you or anything like that. And in the very unlikely situation that anyone says anything rude to you, report it to the management. They don't take things like that lightly.0
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Im a regular gym guy and am always impressed with the newbies for actually getting there. I think you would be surprised at how many people are cheering you on. Go and get it done, you will soon see results and get familiar with the machines and the people.0
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Instead of using them as intimidation, try and see them as motivation. They're there for themselves (they're not focused on you), and the reason they're fit is because they go to the gym.
Focus on yourself and before you know it, you'll be one of the fit people at the gym.0 -
Usually the people who look the "fittest" are the ones who understand the most.. they've gone through the bad so they can relate to you.
Honestly, if I see anyone who brings intensity is really inspiring.. whether if that person is older, heavier, etc.0 -
Thanks everyone! I know I have no reason to have anxiety, but you know, low self esteem does that to ya! But I know the only way to fix that is to go again and keep going. Thank you for your kind words, I needed them0
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You know, a lot of those super fit people used to be in your shoes and look at how far they have come0
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Anxiety is hard. In the end, it is unreasonable, but it can be really hard to come. Do some slow breathing and ask yourself: do you want to be afraid and frail? Or do you want to get in there and join the ranks of the super fit? (Listening to Eye of the Tiger won't hurt.)
Plus, we're all here cheering you on! :flowerforyou: Come back and tell us how your experience was, okay?0 -
I completely understand where you coming from. Very insecure myself. But I decided to stop by this gym I hear about on the radio - the commercial kept repeating how they are - no judgment - no critic - place etc. and open 24/7 and only 10 $ a month.. so I decided to go in there and see how it is.
To my surprise - it really is the way they advertised. I saw just regular people, young, old- out of shape just like myself - I felt relaxed and never looked at .
It's called - Planet Fitness - they are almost in every city- if you have the chance / location etc- check them out .
Otherwise just do what everyone else already has suggested. We all have to start somewhere . I don't pay attention to the others - and most people nowadays are busy with their smartphones and checking themselves out Just go do your thing0 -
You're paying membership fees for the gym right? So go there and do what you came to do. Doesn't matter what everyone else is doing or what they look like. You all share a common goal. Majority of them probably won't pay any attention to you, cause their focused on what their doing. So just relax, everything will be fine.0
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I can totally relate. I purposely chose the appartment complex with the smallest, most limited gym. Just the basics. Only a few ppl use it. I just can't lose myself in the workout if there are other people there... And Id probably get kicked out of a populated gym for breathlessly "singing" Rage Against the Machine lyrics while struggling on the elliptical, with my eyes shut like some weirdo. I cringe to think how I look working out! I'd be way too embarrassed to walk over to the dumb bells and do squats. Omg. I'm sure some helpful guy would come over and tell me I'm doing it all wrong.0
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Is it possible to go at a different time? I usually go first thing in the morning and the crowd is good. Whenever I've gone after work it's packed and I can see why it could be intimidating.
Otherwise, as hard as it may be, just go in and do your thing, confidence will come in time.0 -
I felt that way, too, but I went anyway. The more you go, the more comfortable you'll get. Just go!0
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I started running outside about a year ago and my run route is close to a few schools, all of which get let out when I go for my run. So At first I had to deal with my paranoid delusions that people where looking at me, but that became motivation to keep going and not stop because I didn't want to have to look at them as I huffed and puffed. Eventually I got used to the glances from people and now I don't even give it a second thought. If they look if they don't it doesn't matter cause I'm doing it for me not them.
However, a few days ago when I passed the school where all the parents line up to pick up there kids, there was a woman who gave me a big smile and a thumbs up. :P (I got a few high fives from other runners too from time to time). But it just reminds me that there are good people out there who want to see you succeed even if they don't know you. You might even meet someone there who offers good advice. But either way, you're going to the gym for you, so don't deprive yourself of that because you're worried other people are looking.0 -
I have gym anxiety too...because people at my gym STARE. It's as though they've never seen a large lady on an elliptical before!! My husband and I found that we aren't very good at going to the gym, so we have started collecting a home gym. We have a small collection of hand weights, a medicine ball, a yoga ball, and our newest addition is a stationary bike. We're in Hawaii, so we're outside walking (I walk, he runs) a lot. Once we get back to the mainland we'll be saving to add a treadmill to get through the winters, and if I get my way, an elliptical and some more weights. It's much easier to work out before and after a long day at work when it's all right here.0
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I used to feel anxious about the gym. I still do, occasionally, if I'm moving on to something I didn't normally do. I stuck with treadmills and 'what I knew' for far too long because of that. But after a few years, I just stopped worrying (mostly) about what others might think and just went for it. I moved to weight machines and soon will move on to the Smith Machines, then free weights, then.... Baby steps. We've all been there. No worries.0
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I've found that people aren't watching you/judging you as much as you think they are. They are pretty focused on their own routine. (At least that's how I am0
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Understand 2 things:
1. The odds are that no one will notice because they are there to work on themselves, just like you.
2. If they do notice, the odds are that they either aren't getting the job done for themselves and want to take the low road (in which case, don't be like that...kick *kitten*, handle your business and have an awesome day) or they are admiring the fact that you are working so hard (in which case, good on you for being a positive force in the world!).0 -
Remember these facts:
1) People at the gym are focused on themselves, not you. When I'm on the bike or elliptical, I frequently just close my eyes and listen to music and don't even notice the person next to me.
2) Everyone starts somewhere. Those fit people you see were not always fit. When I started, I could only do about 15 min of cardio.
3) You are working harder than all those fit people. The more you weigh, the harder it is to exercise. Think about moving 300 lbs compared to 100 lbs. 100 lbs is a lot easier.
4) Forward progress is progress, no matter how slow it is.
Also, I've seen this on the web a few times, and it might help. I feel this exact same way as this writer. I was extremely out of shape when I started, and felt out of place at the gym. Then I found this, and it helped me a lot:
"Hey, Fat Girl.
Yes, you. The one feigning to not see me when we cross paths on the running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy. You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make you cringe.
You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.
You are awesome.
If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.
You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is possible.
You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people, know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health, “starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.
You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.
I bow to you."0 -
I felt the same way, so NO you are not alone:flowerforyou:
I jut went in and said Jules, just do one thing.
and then i went again...and it became less awkward every time
you can do it...you are worth it.
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I have been working out on my college campus, and every day I am stared at or laughed at or both. It bothered me at first, and I almost didn't go back. But my tuition covers the fees and I'll be damned if I let a bunch of conceited meat head jerks scare me out of the gym. Keep going, turn your headphones up, and go hard.0
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Understand 2 things:
1. The odds are that no one will notice because they are there to work on themselves, just like you.
2. If they do notice, the odds are that they either aren't getting the job done for themselves and want to take the low road (in which case, don't be like that...kick *kitten*, handle your business and have an awesome day) or they are admiring the fact that you are working so hard (in which case, good on you for being a positive force in the world!).
Great advice. And #3) People who talk badly about people at the gym aren't worth the worry. We're all there to better ourselves in whatever way matters most to us.0 -
Im a regular gym guy and am always impressed with the newbies for actually getting there. I think you would be surprised at how many people are cheering you on. Go and get it done, you will soon see results and get familiar with the machines and the people.
I started going to the gym @230lbs. I was easily one of the largest women there. I kept going even though I felt embarrassed and awkward. I was surprised and flattered by several kind people who complimented my effort, improved appearance and improved fitness. So go work it out, and be sure and compliment those you admire at the gym whether fit or in the process of getting fit. Giving others support helps take the focus off my anxiety.0 -
Do they offer any classes? Make a friend in one and it will help keep you motivated. Or make a promise with mfp friend to both go to the gym that day. Once it becomes routine it will feel more comfortable. You got this! !0
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Hi AES - Have a clear plan on what you want to do at the gym. Just get in there and put in your best effort. You will be surprised how quickly your body will adjust and your confidence will grow. If you are going to do if you are going to do weights do this after Cardio stretching exercises last - don't be afraid to ask an attendant (staff of the gym) to explain a bit of kit (it is better then using incorrect technique and if they give you grief find another gym that actually cares about people. You are at the door and decided that this is part of your strategy the best way to address your anxiety - in a week or two you will be glad you did and will wonder what you were worried about.0
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I had the same conversation with one of the fitness coaches at work today. We have a gym at most of our sites, however, I don't workout there for a couple of reasons: 1) too many people want to talk work, 2) I feel very self conscious working out with my colleagues (?) 3) out of shape and strugging with my work out and 4) fear of judgement.
I have, however, found a fantastic little gym where I feel comfortable and am excited to work out.
Hang in there, it's for you, you are going. I have faith in you, you are worth it!!0 -
Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement! I decided to face my fears and not let my low self esteem and unhealthy thoughts about myself or what other people think of me get in my way anymore! I stayed for an hour, I would have stayed longer but they were closing but I burned over 650 calories! I would call that a win! I'm so glad I decided to go and did my best. I'm a lot stronger than I let myself belief and sometimes it takes a kind word and gentle nudge to get me to realize my strength. So thank you everyone! I am looking forward to going again tomorrow. And what really helped was not allowing myself to be intimidated by all the fit people but using them as motivation instead. Thanks for the suggestion!0
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