Relapse?

Any chance you could open your diary?

I hear you about having a relapse. I'd been diagnosed with depression and until then I hadn't fully recognized that my lower body gaining had been because I was eating way too many bad things and didn't log them out of shame. I'm getting better about it now because now I'm trying to take charge of the depression I battle everyday.

I go to the gym 5-6 days a week and I usually put in roughly 500-800 calories burns when I'm there (I use an hrm to make sure my counts are about as accurate as they can be)... One thing I struggled with last year was I was eating ONLY 1500 calories, not eating back my calories and was binge eating once a week. I got down to 138lbs but plateaued and started feeling weak and injured myself- gaining back 8lbs. After reevaluating last summer, I started using TDEE (total daily energy expenditure-http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/) and subtracting 20% from the top for my deficit. That set me at a comfortable 1800 calories to eat everyday and I noticed that I began toning better and more fat was coming off. That was before I started to slip into depression and began eating whatever the heck I wanted any time I wanted... I'm back on track now though with a different mindset.

I've recently bumped my calories up to 2000 (which is actually my TDEE minus 15%) let myself eat a little more on days that I'm hungry or a little less, but try to stay around the 2000 mark. In the last two weeks of doing that, I've lost 1.6 pounds and am within 7 lbs of my goal now, but will continue to eat the same ways even when I hit goal to see if I can get under goal, but in a healthier way. I guess the biggest thing is stop thinking of it as a diet, but a life style change. Do you want to eat like this every day of your life? If not, then reevaluate your goals and make them attainable by making new choices but not always sacrificing eating that delicious brownie, instead, divide it in half or quarters and enjoy it multiple days...

Some ways I've changed my way of eating is by eating 5-6 meals a day. If I'm hungry for something peanut buttery and chocolate I'll whip up a protein shake using peanut butter, cocoa, banana, and milk. Tastes delicious!! I also eat beef or turkey sticks during snacks and whole grain carbs for my snacks. Meal times I usually try to keep everything under 500 calories, but don't fret if I go over. I find the more I eat throughout the day, the more satisfied I am and the less likely I'll binge eat. I do stand by the belief though that it is okay to have a cheat day every once in a while (bi weekly.... but not more than once a week). In order to lose 1 lb, you need to cut 3500 calories in a week, by making it a slower loss, you will maintain easier once you get close to goal weight.

Hope this helps! Feel free to friend me too!

Someone very wise once said to me, "When you are ready to lose the weight - you will." I thought they were crazy and couldn't believe they didn't believe that I was totally ready.

Well, I wasn't ready for about 4 more years. When I was ready to put in all the hard work, I began to just do it. I've been doing it for 20 months now. I have never lost this much or maintained my lifting and running this long. It's hard but you can do it too. You just have to be ready. You have to want it more than anything else. Hope that comes to you soon!

I am not here to lose, but to track my calories and macros. I know lots of folks use MFP to maintain, so maybe there is your answer?

This for me too.


I've tried to leave in the past and I've noticed that things start to slide. So I figure I'm in it for the long haul.